Coons and Bluegrass (long)
Purvis Jackson
Parts of this are a tad Tut-like. -> Bluegrass Content
Andrew Roblin (author of Valerie's Waltz, a beautiful composition)
describes his reaction to the use of the word "coon" during stage
patter at IBMA, suggesting the reference was racially derogatory and,
therefore, odious and deserving of reprimand by act (walking out) if
not word (booing, etc.) or perhaps both (a boo over the shoulder
during departure?). Bangs, with his usual surgical precision, disects
Andrew's point of view to the dismay of several and the applause of
several more. The issue of context, or its lack, is central to the
argument: Andrew heard the remark in context and found it racial;
those absent lack context, regardless of how they judge the remark.
Therefore, Andrew's conclusion cannot be challenged, since the rest of
us lack context, we cannot say anything about what was really uttered;
rather, we can offer explanations of how the utterance may not have
been racial, attributing it to other habits of speech, such as
"Southernisms" or "From-the-sticksisms" or
"pick-what-fits-you-bestisms" dejour.
The point is moot.
What is interesting is Andrew's double entendre in appealing to us to
bring Bluegrass from ". . . the back of the bus." It strikes me that
the problem is more of the fact that Bluegrass has never made its way
to the back of the bus.
In agreement with the timeless wisdom of the Bangsmeister, however, I
do not think the coon was a person that Jimmy Martin had Old Pete
("Listen what a jaw on a dog!") out to catch for the preacher man;
nor, however, would I put such a thing beyond the possible for Jimmy.
I grew up in parts of South Carolina where coon was both a victual
delight and a social reference: We had coons, coonasses, coonheads,
and coonspooks. We did not, however, have "raccoons" anywhere except
in zoos for yankee city-slickened visitors to gawk at as though they
were beasts of the jungle. Say the word "raccoon" where I grew up and
you'd just as likely get your jaw jacked as not, for the locals would
have thought you some kind of a queer for talking like that. Same for
"oppossum" as a rule. But while on the subject, somebody (Dian = Sugaree)
mentioned cooking:
Now I put it to you: What is the best way to prepare the scrumptuous
north american marsupial: the possum? Though some may say, "fried,
baked, boiled," I have to insist the creature must be broiled, for the
ensuing juices are appropriate for the hair and other items that need
to be oiled.
The proper method is to fatten the beast; to clean out its system requires
one week at the least. Once the creature acquires a fat lazy manner, hit it
center cranium with a hatchet or hammer, which may require additional blows
until the skull pops and the brain is exposed (don't assume it's dead
because its eyes are closed). Slit it along the lips to allow the skin to
be peeled from the head and neck in one piece. Break the forelegs in
several places to remove them without damaging the pelt. Once the "ankles"
are exposed, snip through them with lineman's pliers, leaving the footbones
and tiny paws attached to the hide. Continue the process until the back
legs are removed and you reach the southmost part of the northward pointing
carcass. Using the pliers, snip though the joint where the tail attaches to
the spine. Thus you have a one piece possum pelt, good for a lady's purse;
the pouch is most useful for change and other such items.
Rather than opening the stomach tract to remove the entrails, simply stretch
the mouth open wide and slit the muscle holding the jawbones taut. Snip the
jaw hinges with your pliers, and force the upper and lower jaws into a 180
degree alignment (not unlike setting a steel trap). With the mouth
stretched open wide, reach down its throat and into the stomach with a
needle nose pliers. Probe about with the pliers (the index finger will
suffice if you have small hands) until the exit is located. With your free
hand, insert the nub of the tail into the jaws of the needle nose pliers
(between thumb and index finger for the small handed). When the tail is
firmly grasped, quickly jerk your arm from its mouth, holding the nose with
your free hand. If successful, the possum should now be inside out; it
may be necessary to repeat the process several times. Don't worry if you
miss the first time; you'll get the hang of it pretty quickly.
The next step is to clean the entrails. This may be done by any of several
methods: Most people prefer "dog pulling" and "stump lashing". For the
dog pulling method, you need at least one Walker or Black-and-Tan hound,
preferably trained to respond to commands. Slip an axe handle through the
inverted possum, and let the tip of an intestine dangle several inches.
Now have the dog "sit" directly in front of you. Lower the intestine till it
dangles just above the dog's nose. Brace yourself, and yell "Get 'im, Buck",
assuming your dog is named Buck; otherwise, use the dog's name. As soon as
Buck latches ahold of the entrails, he will stiffen his legs and begin to back
away, shaking his head from side to side. The beauty of this is that the
entrails will pull right off the possum, occasionally creating a spinning
motion on the axe handle that, so help me, is not unlike the feeling you
get when trying to land a large-mouth bass on a flyrod.
Once cleaned, the possum should have a consistency likened to beef tripe.
Re-invert the carcass and insert a metal rod through it; a rear axle from
a John Deere 40-20 works best, but I have heard those from a 1956 Studebaker
Champion will suffice. You need a square broiling pit built from cement
blocks to a height of about 2.5 feet. Fill this pit with dried cow chips
and dowse them with corn 'licker'; put an old car door or metal feeder
trough over the possum; light the cow chips. Don't fret the roaring flame,
for it will last but a minute or two, imparting a crispness to the possum
that cannot be had otherwise. Turn the possum 1/4 turn every 15 minutes
and cook for about 1.5 hrs, or until the chips stop smoldering. Be careful
when turning it, for the metal rod will be quite hot, which is required to
cook the possum on the inside. Most folks use two 36 inch pipe wrenches,
one on either end, to turn the possum without getting burned; old rags will
also work if you move quickly.
By the time the possum is ready, you should have boiled down a bushel
of collard greens to get them cooked slippery. In a separate
washpot, cook 5 lbs of cornmeal with 1 gallon of buttermilk, 8 eggs,
a small box of arm & hammar baking soda, and 6 tablespoons of salt.
Assuming you start the whole project at daybreak, it should now be just
about noon. Go wash your face and hands, get a bowl, and combine one cup
collard greens and one cup crumbled cornbread; tear off strips of possum
about 1/2 inch wide and use them to scoop the mush from the bowl. This, my
friends, is good eatin' in any language, but to do it right you should be
sitting under a mossdraped live oak with mosquitoes buzzing in your ears and
gnats crawling around the perimeter of your mouth lapping up the possum
grease that invariably runs down your chin.
Now I know what you're thinking at this point: "Is it really worth all that
trouble?" To this I must respond with an unqualified yessirbuddy. But you
must remember that the success of the entire recipe depends on fresh possum.
Whatever you do, don't be foolish enough to try it with Mrs. Paul's frozen
possum, for the texture and taste are not of a high quality. Enjoy.
BTW: I don't know if it's still there, but if you're ever in Eutaw
Springs, S.C., stop by Vernon DeLauder's AMOCO station and get some
possum dip, a possum sandwich, or a piece of his fast becoming famous
possum pizza. If it's still there, it's downright bodacious.
Ben S. Austin
Friends,
Purvis was of thoughtful to share with us his wonderful
instructions for cleaning and preparing the "possum." Can't wait to try
it! But recipe inspired me to share a recipe for another type of critter
which has been maligned almost as much as the possum, namely, the carp.
The following recipe has been in my family for a long time and
some of you folk, not native to the southern part of the country, might
like to have it.
1. First, you gotta catch the carp. I will leave you to your
own devices on this one -- I simply use a dough ball on a
big hook and some 20 lb test line. Some of these southern
carp are huge.
2. Carp are better skinned instead of scaled. Cut off the
head right behind the gills. Take a pair of pliers and
just pull the skin of'n him.
3. Take a good sharp fillet knife and incise the critter
along the bottom from one end to the other. This will allow
you to remove entrails, bladder, etc.
4. Now that you got him cleaned, lay him on a fresh pine
plank just a little longer and wider than the fish. Salt
and pepper to taste, put a little butter on him and, if you
want to, a little garlic.
5. Cut up three pretty good sized potatoes and one big onion.
Lay the onion rings all along the length of the carp.
Put the quartered potatoes on top. If you like carrots,
they're good too.
6. Wrap the whole thing in aluminum foil and put in in the
hot coals. It helps to rake some coals on top of it. Let
it bake for about 40 minutes.
5. Unwrap the foil, throw everything away and eat the pine
board.
Ben Austin
====================================================
Ben S. Austin, Assistant Professor of Sociology
Middle Tennessee State University
Murfreesboro, Tennessee 37132
bau...@frank.mtsu.edu
http://www.mtsu.edu/~baustin
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T. Roy Matthews
This is great!! Here's a virtual slap on the back!!