Why "Theory of Mind" does't have to be absent to be a problem

[Blackjar]

Part of the problem with "Theory of Mind" that autistic people have is
simply that using it doesn't always work for us. Autistics think
differently than normal people, and experience life differently than
normal people. So, when an autistic person puts xyr self into a normal
person's "shoes," and tries to see how they would feel, the result is
often wrong. When an a normal person does this with another normal
person, xe may be wrong, but there is a good chance that xe is right -- it
doesn't work that way when an autistic person tries to do the same thing
to a normal person. Because this fails so often, the idea of trying to do
this doesn't become as habitual for autistics as it does for normal people
(though certain situation may be exceptions). Furhter, it leaves the
autistic person in a confusing world of people whose motives are so
different and unpredictable that it can be overwhelming -- the autistic
person does not have the luxury of assuming so easily what another person
is feeling. This same thing happen when normal people deal with autistic
person, except that normal people aren't use to it, and so they are simply
confused by the odd behavior of the autistic person -- as one parent once
commented about their child, "he follows a beat, but it's a beat we can't
understand." autistics with perfectly functional "Theories of Mind"
may not benefit from it in many social situation, simply because it gives
wrong result, and the same is often true of normal people dealing with
autistics.
.
Many parents know this intuitively, and are eager to ask question of
autistic person, about their own autistic child -- even to the point that
the poor autistic person is overwhelmed with deep questions about someone
they have never even met! (Of course, normal people don't always
understand each other, and the same is true of autistics, but when a
normal person and an autistic person meet the confusion can be
overwhelming for both.) Still, most parents have some intuitive
understanding that "our child is not like us, maybe someone like xem could
help...."

This is not to say the ToM is not a problem for some autsitc people, but
the not for all -- the concept that it underlies autism and the associated
social diffculties is absurd.

Jared Blackburn
http://members.aol.com/blackjar/

[Dave Spicer]

On 3 May 1997 21:31:37 GMT, blac...@aol.com (Blackjar) wrote:

> So, when an autistic person puts xyr self into a normal

>person's "shoes,"...

> xe may be wrong, but there is a good chance that xe is right --

For those who haven't seen these two words before, they were developed and are
used in some other lists as a completely gender-independent way of referring to
a person.

- Dave