take it a few steps further -- I really believe it should be banned in all
public places, even bars.
Anyway, we've decided that smoking is out for our wedding. So far, we plan
to add "thank you for not smoking" to the bottom of the invitation and/or
the directions.
We've also asked the Inn to post nonsmoking signs.
But here's where we get just a bit controversial:
1. We plan to instruct the caterer to use only nonsmokers at our wedding.
We don't want to smell cigarette smoke from the kitchen, and don't want
smoke near our food.
If someone sneaks a drag in the kitchen, I'll smell it, even from out on
the dance floor. Yes, I am that anal and that opposed to smoking.In fact,
I can smell a smoker even though they're not smoking.
I really don't want someone who stinks from stale smoke carrying food to my
guests. And they WILL stink, even if it was just one cigarette in the car
on the way to work.
2. We plan to ask our guests to not smoke at all, not even in the
courtyard outside. Again, it looks disgusting, disrespectful, and above
all, smells awful. Leave your nicotine addiction at home.
Most of our guests do not smoke, so it's not a major issue with them. Do
you think I'm being out-of-line with the wait staff and caterer? After
all, WE ARE PAYING THEM.
This is not meant to be a debate on smokers rights vs banning smoking.
This is our event, and we don't want to smell smoke. If you got past a 3rd
grade education, there's no excuse for being near a cigarette, you know
better. We want to enjoy our day without someone fouling the air or
breathing their "cancer breath" on our food, clothes, and other guests.
Katherine (and David)
12-15-95 and 6-22-96
As for the catering staff, write it into your contract with them. Hopefully
you haven't finalized the contract and still can. If you have already signed
one, see if they will allow an addendum. But please be realistic about your
catering staff. Many use temporary help and really have little control over
what that help does.
If you are having a long reception, people will probably smoke. Hate to break
it to you, but even with no smoking signs and stuff, people will go to
restrooms and light up or go outside or to their cars. Whatever it takes.
You're also not going to be able to control what the help does on their way to
the reception. You'd be violating their rights by trying to write that into a
contract! You pay them to perform a service and I'm sure they will do their
best to accomodate you.
Bottom Line: Try and relax about it. I GUARANTEE that unless they smoke in
your face, you'll be too busy to notice or care about it. That's how wedding
receptions are.
Melissa
In article <4j708v$f...@news1.h1.usa.pipeline.com>
>As to the cater, if he can agree to your terms, than so be it. But, keep
in mind
>what you are requesting is descrimination. He may face a law suit if he
refuses
>to hire smokers, or decides fire an employee based their legal habits.
You are
>paying them, but you don't own them. Requesting them not to smoke in the
>kitchen, or while serving is reasonable.
Just an aside, I don't believe that discriminating against smokers is
against the law. Insurance companies do it all the time (i.e., higher
premiums for smokers than non-smokers). What is against the law is
discrimination against race, origin, gender, disabilities, and religious
beliefs.
Karmela
: >
If you have found a caterer that allows people to smoke in the kitchen,
then you need to find another one. Smoking, along with long hair hanging
down are no-nos in any food service business, and if they allowed that,
then you need to find someone else. I won't even comment on the rest, but
just wanted to let you know that part.
Jenn
--
Signature? You expect me to have a signature? My name is changing in just a few short months, I'll have to learn to write my name again before I can have a signature...
Gaelen (& Stacy)
**July 12, 1996**
**in beautiful malibu, ca**
*********
I'm a non-smoker, but a couple of comments. You ask not to be flamed, but then
use terms like "cancer breath" and suggesting that smokers have the equilvant of
a third grade education. Is that necessary??
Also bars, are not public places, but rather privately owned businesses. This
type of regulation is another form of sensorship like seen with CDA. If a
bar owner wants to limit his clients, that that is his decision, not Big
Brother.
As to the cater, if he can agree to your terms, than so be it. But, keep in mind
what you are requesting is descrimination. He may face a law suit if he refuses
to hire smokers, or decides fire an employee based their legal habits. You are
paying them, but you don't own them. Requesting them not to smoke in the kitchen,
or while serving is reasonable.
I think your going a bit overboard in requesting both guests, and workers not to
smoke outside your reception. Also, I'm assuming the hotel you've rented is not
exclusively yours for the evening. You will have no control over other events at
the hotel, or hotel guests.
I do not like smoking either, but many feel that smoking is their 'right', and I
have to agree. This is America, not Red China.
--
Ron Frank
Mirror Image Photography
Conifer, CO (303) 838-3099
ron....@consumer.mci.com
What insurance companies do is a little different. Smokers are generally
less healthy and more of a risk. It's the same with people who have bad
driving records - - they will have higher car insurance premiums (as it
should be).
Insurance premiums also vary with age, gender and sometimes disability.
Lisa
You may be right, I'm not a lawyer, but insurance companies are not refusing to
insure smokers, they just charge them more. I believe if an employeer refused to
hire a smoker, and stated that as the reason, some lawyer would be happy to sue.
I'm sure the scumbag at esq...@primenet.com would be happy to file the motion.
In reality, there are precious FEW reasons on which you are not permitted
to discriminate (race, religion, national origin, sex -- I think I got
them all there. And even those are limited, such as when there is a
bona fide occupational requirement (e.g., *Hooters* - yech - claims that
its a BFOQ to hire women with large chests, no men)) There may be some
state law issues here, but my bet would be that you would win if you
would refuse to hire smokers. One thing you definitely CAN do is declare
that your workplace is a smoke free environment.
I am not a fanatic, but we did it the easy way -- we were married, and
had the reception, in a smoke-free place. Now, if one of the waiters
smoked on the way there, or went out on a break, I don't know. In fact,
I wouldn't place bets that my mom and the best man weren't out front with
a cigarette themselves. You can try to control those things in advance,
I suppose, but if you spend your wedding day trying to sniff out the
waiters, and checking the kitchen, you're not going to spend it enjoying
yourself.
Barbara
I am very allergic to smoke to the point that it gives me asthama attacks
and I will be ill for several days. I do not think it would be proper to
say anything on the invitation, however I think it would be proper to say
something on directions or other follow up mailings to people who plan to
attend. I might just say, the Inn does not allow smoking in the reception
room. I think you may have a real hard time having the Inn make both the
inside and outside smoke free, especially if there are other events at the
Inn, but you can try. You may be out of line with the wait staff and
caterer requesting only non smokers, you may have to settle for no smoking
on the premises. Good luck and let me know how it works out.
>
--
Abby Riba
Abby Designs
Custom Dressmaker
PACC Member-at-Large National Board Representative
Clearwater, FL
Deirdre and David 8/9/96
i plan to have a smoke fee wedding. I am getting married on july 21, and
people are more then welcome to take a step outside!
MY FIANCEE HAS ASTHMA AND I JUST CAN'T STNAD THE SMELL OF THE STUFF!
I HAVE NO PROBLEM ASKING PEOPLE NOT TO SMOKE IN MY RECEPTION HALL...AND
YES, IT IS MY DAY :)
GINA (JULY 21, 96)
My fiance and I are both allergic to smoke and have requested that the
hotel inform our guests that it is a smoke-free reception. We are also
putting tent-signs on our tables (courtesy of the American Cancer
Society) that say "thank you for not smoking". Our disc jockey/MC
will also be making an announcement.
It is "our" day and we feel it is our choice. If our guests want to
smoke they can go to the hotel bar or outside.
Debbie & Larry
6-8-96
In article <Pine.SOL.3.92.960402...@planetx.bloomu.edu> "Gina
M. Guarino" <gmg...@planetx.bloomu.edu> writes:>Subject: Re: We Want A
Smoke-free wedding>From: "Gina M. Guarino" <gmg...@planetx.bloomu.edu>
>Date: Tue, 2 Apr 1996 20:51:52 -0500
Exactly. They can go outside. The original poster said something about
letting the guests know that he would have a conniption fit if they even
went outside to smoke. He then went on to say that anyone who smokes is
uneducated and a bunch of other insulting things. All this was after
saying that they were inviting some smoking friends to their wedding.
I'm sure his friends would be thrilled to know that he considers them
repulsive and uneducated.
Kris