_p_ost_ing s_of_tware
btjb...@gigsuleax.com
__Pos_te_d_ us_in_g_ _the _d_ash_ify _o_ption
_t_his_ _ma_kes_ _eve_r_y m_essag_e _tot_a_lly
u_ni_q_ue an_d_ _s_til_l_ re_ad_ab_l_e.
_B_e_tte_r_ _to_ _h_ave_ a_ _fu_n_n_y lo_oki_ng
_mes_sag_e_ th_an non_e_ a_t_ _a_ll!
__This _i_s _ju_s_t_ _o_n_e o_f the _av_a_ilab_le
__op_t_ions in_clu_de_d i_n_ t_his_ so_f_tw_a_re
>> P_o_sted _usi_n_g_ s_m_art po_st_ pro
>> _D_o_wnl_o_ad_ a_ cop_y _at
>> __ht_tp_:/_/_d_ef_iso_f_.b_i_zla_nd._co_m/
>> R_em_ov_e_ _t_he_ _
Mike and Edie Christianson
by Ian - cybe...@cyber-ant.org
Tell me what you think, it's my first one.
* * * * *
Enter SOL
(Here we see Tom and Crow both holding chain saws trying
to hack each other to bits.)
Tom: I say we watch the wood cutting competition!
[He swipes at Crow barely missing]
Crow: I say we watch Highlander!
[Crow lunges at Tom, also missing]
[Mike walks in]
Mike(while trying to break them up): Whoa! Hold on guys!
Tom: He started it.
Mike: What's up with the chainsaw fight.
Crow: I wanted to watch Highlander and he wanted to watch
the woodcutting finals. So we decided to combine the
two and fight to determine the best show.
Mike: Don't you guys ever worry about killing each other
or anybody else?
Tom and Crow: No.
[Light Flashes]
Mike: Boris, Natasha, and Fearless Leader are calling.
* * * * *
Castle F
(Castle Forester looks as normal as always. Except Bobo
is curled up on the floor.)
Pearl: Nelson, I have decided to try something new today.
Spamming has always been a plague to everyone, filling
up newsgroups and e-mails with advertisements, pyramid
schemes, and chain letters. I have decided to harness
that energy and release it on you by means of slow
agonizing torture.
* * * * *
SOL
Mike: Pearl, could you tell me why Bobo is lying on the ground
in a fetal position?
* * * * *
Castle F
Pearl: Just a little negative reinforcement, Mike.
* * * * *
SOL
Mike: Oh, I see.
* * * * *
Castle F
Pearl: Brain Guy, send them the spam.
Observer: Sure thing just one second.
[psychic nose is made]
Observer: There, done.
* * * * *
SOL
(Now Mike has a chainsaw as well.)
Mike: I think we're better off with the chainsaw fight.
[Spam Sign - SOL shakes and lights flash]
Mike: We've got Spam Sign!
6 - 5 - 4 - 3 - 2 - 1
* * * * *
The Theater
[everyone takes their normal seats]
Subject: _p_ost_ing s_of_tware
Date: 5 Jul 2000 02:23:36 GMT
From: btjb...@gigsuleax.com
Crow: Hey Mike, don't you have some gigsuleax somewhere?
Mike: Yea, I use it as fryer oil.
Organization: [posted via Eidosnet]
Newsgroups: alt.tv.mst3k.mstings
Tom: alt.tv.mst3k.mstings eh? I'll have to remember
this newsgroup.
>
> __Pos_te_d_ us_in_g_ _the _d_ash_ify _o_ption
> _t_his_ _ma_kes_ _eve_r_y m_essag_e _tot_a_lly
> u_ni_q_ue an_
Tom: I have always been a devote follower of
uniquean philosophy.
> d_ _s_til_l_
Mike: ...for three hours to form a powerful
concentrate.
re_ad_ab_l_e.
>
> _B_e_tte_r_ _to_ _h_ave_ a_
Crow: ...life.
> _fu_n_n_y lo_oki_ng
> _mes_sag_e_ th_an non_e_ a_t_ _a_ll!
Tom: I'm not sure but I would think that to some,
it would be better to be mangled by wolverines
than to live with this text.
>
> __This _i_s _ju_s_t_ _o_n_e o_f the _av_a_ilab_le
> __op_t_ions in_clu_de_d i_n_
Mike: Includedin, for 24 hour allergy relief.
> t_his_ so_f_tw_a_re
ALL: ...sucks!
>
>
>
Tom: Looks like the contents of Dan Quayles's head.
> >> P_o_sted _usi_n_g_ s_m_art po_st_ pro
> >> _D_o_wnl_o_ad_ a_ cop_y _at
> >> __ht_tp_:/_/_d_ef_iso_f_.b_i_zla_nd._co_m/
Crow: Didn't we deep fry some bizla's in the gigsuleax
oil last monday?
Tom: Yeah that was fun.
Mike: What _is_ a bizla?
Tom: That's what we call the rats in the storage bay.
Mike: You said it was fried chicken nuggets! *mrph*
[Mikes runs off]
> >> R_em_ov_e_ _t_he_ _
Crow: ...the what? What I am I supposed to remove?
Tom: I think we're being told to remove our clothes.
Crow: We don't wear clothes.
Tom: So we're covered.
1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5 - 6
* * * * *
SOL
(Crow and Tom have the fryer out. You can hear it
boiling.)
Tom: Good thing we still had that Varmit Vac.
Crow: Yeah, that made it easier.
[Mike enters]
Mike: Never feed me anything like that ever again!
* * * * *
Castle F
Pearl: So Mike, how strong are your first feelings of
anger and aggression that are a sign of what's to
follow?
* * * * *
SOL
Mike: That was ...um ...short.
Tom: Yeah, that was a breeze compared to Space Chief.
Crow: Since you failed miserably, Servo and I felt sorry
for you and fried up some chicken nuggets just for you.
[Crow holds up a platter covered in "chicken nuggets"]
* * * * *
Castle F
Pearl(wiping her eyes): Thank you guys. You are the best.
Brain Guy, will you do the honors.
Observer: Sure thing Pearl.
[Psychic noise again, the platter appears in his hands]
[Pearl picks one up and takes a bite making a large crunch
noise]
(Fade to credits)
All characters mentioned and portrayed are copyright their
original owners and no harm is intended by this MiSTing.
"I don't like spam!"
-Monty Python Spam Sketch
Best Brains