NEW MiSTING: The Field Trip [STNG, Marrissa, Ratliff] [PG] [5/8]
MBlackw415
[Mike, Crow, and Tom enter and take their places.]
Mike: o/~ ...One thousand men will die today
but only one, is a Throwaway! o/~
Crow: Let the dream die, Mike.
> Up ahead, the steam disappeared into a cliff.
Tom: And a Norm.
Mike: Come and see the reverse geyser!
> Up beside the
>grey stone cliff, a path lead upward.
Mike: To an upper place which was up above it.
> It was a fairly well
>traveled path, that apparently hadn't been used in a while..
Mike: Can you spot the logical contradiction here, boys & girls?
>Marrissa lead her bunch up the path, to the mouth of a cave.
Crow: [Marrissa] Come on, guys, we're the Goonies!
> It
>was a mid-size entry, roughly trapezoidal in shape, about two
>meters in height.
Tom: You don't find many trapezoids in nature.
Crow: It was actually a regular dodecahedron, but why pick nits?
> "Break out the lanterns, we're home," Marrissa said.
Mike: Hi, honey, we're home!
Crow: Ah, cave sweet cave.
Tom: If you lived here, you'd be trapped in a crappy fanfic by now.
> "We're going to live in a cave?" Clara said. "Why in the
>world would we want to live in a cave in this tropical paradise?"
Mike: It's rent controlled.
Tom: And the utilities are paid for.
> "Because, it's going to get really hot today, and the cave
>will be a constant comfortable temperature," Marrissa said.
Crow: Ah, this is one of those caves with the auto-thermostat
feature!
> "That and we've got enemy aliens scanning for us from orbit,
>and the rocks will help hide us," Jay said.
Crow: [Clara] Oh, right! We crash landed on a strange planet, and
our lives are in grave danger! Silly me, I almost forgot.
Mike: [Jay, ominously] I can feel the aliens scanning from orbit
in my mind.
Tom: And the rock cried out, "No hiding place for Marrissa!".
> "Really?" Clara said, as they entered the passage.
Crow: [Jay] Well, no. The scanners sometimes are able to scan
through rock. Sometimes they don't. It's almost as if
people were making up the scanner's abilities at whim.
> "Not much," Marrissa replied as the walked down the curving
>passage. "Every bit counts though." Suddenly the passage opened
>up.
Mike: It started babbling about its own needs and desires.
> The main chamber was about 3 meters high in the center, an
>irregular oval, 15 meters in diameter with three other passages
>leading off it.
Tom: Mapping. Get out the graph paper.
Mike: Got it.
> One of them lead downward. The other two were
>up a step.
[Mike scribbles on his paper.]
> Marrissa motioned Jay and Alex to check out one of
>the upper passage,
Tom: [Marrissa] Go see how many venomous creatures are in there.
> and Shayna and Clara to check the other one.
Tom: [Marlin Perkins] And while the rest of the kids are off
exploring potentially dangerous cave sections, I'll be back
here mixing up a pitcher of strawberry margaritas.
>She stayed in the main chamber and began unpacking. A lantern
>style light was quickly attached to the ceiling.
Mike: And here comes Hal Jordan, cussing her out.
> The model was
>one that Marrissa's parents had used on many camping trips, and
>Marrissa was very familiar with it.
Tom: A strangely familiar brass lantern is hanging from the ceiling.
Crow: Back to the GUE, huh Tom?
> After a couple minutes, the
>others returned.
> "What did you find?" Marrissa asked.
Crow: [Shayna] I found Enlightenment.
Tom: [Clara] I found an undamaged cache of pulsed phaser rifles!
Mike: [Jay] I found a rock.
> "It's a small chamber, about 3 meters by 4 meters," Jay
>responded. "No additional branches."
> "Same on our side, but ours was 3 and a half by 4 meters,"
>Clara remarked.
Tom: 'cause girls are *better*. Nyah-nyah.
Crow: And that extra half a meter will be significant later on, folks.
> "Good, those will be our sleeping chambers," Marrissa said.
Tom: [Marrissa] Let's all hang from our toes until sunset, then we
go hunt bugs with our internal radar.
>"We just have to make sure nothing has change on our bathing
>chamber, and we'll be okay."
Tom: What are the chances that they'd find loose change in their
bathtub?
Mike: About the same as them finding a cave in the wilderness with
two ideal bedrooms and a split foyer.
> "Pardon me, Marrissa, but how did you know about this cave
>and the planet's terrain?" Shayna asked.
Crow: [Shayna] You're not Q, are you?
Mike:[Marrissa] Of course not, mon capit- er, Shayna...
Tom: [Shayna] And what was that cryptic "bathing chamber" comment
about, anyway?
> "Detailed planetary survey," Marrissa said.
Mike: [Marrissa] While you and the George of the Jungle fan club
were out trying to make trip lines out of daisy chains, I
sent up a complex orbital surveillance system.
> "Star Fleet
>requires any shuttle going a extended distance have a copy of all
>the surveys of planets that it passes, just in case.
Tom: Just in case there are any future galactic despots who need
them.
Crow: Still it explains those huge boxes of AAA maps in the cargo
hold.
> This
>planet's one is quite well done.
Mike: I like my planets medium rare.
Tom: Geez Mike, are you Galactus?
> The Vulcan Science Vessel T'put
All: [TTTO "Whip It"] o/~I said T'put...T'put good. o/~
>completed it late last year. Like any Vulcan survey, it's very
>detailed.
Mike: [Vulcan] Hey Captain Nulek, would you say this blade of
grass is at a 78 or 78.1 degree angle?
> Plus, this cave was used as a staging point for that
>survey. We've got one more chamber, follow me."
Tom: *Next* week, on Plot Convenience Playhouse...
> The five children walked down the last passage.
Crow: Say, isn't this a scene from _Willy Wonka and the
Chocolate Factory_?
> It curved
>gently to the right and sloped downward for about 6 meters before
>opening up into the last chamber.
Tom: What, no naturally formed geyser-powered escalator?
> It was 3 meters in height,
>like the main chamber, but only 5 meters wide and 6 meters long.
Tom: I'm checking for secret doors!
>A waterfall on the far side,
Tom: Over there by a cave man, a French Mammoth, some leather-wearing
cows and the local branch of the Midvale School for the Gifted.
> let a stream of water in, gently
>flowing from an opening two meters up, over a small ledge.
Mike: They shouldn't go chasing waterfalls.
Tom: Yeah, they need to stick to the rivers and lakes that
they're used to.
> There
>was room enough under it for one to take a shower.
Crow: The water had also eroded away a soapdish, a razor, and a
bottle of conditioner.
> The stream
>flowed across the far side of the room, before disappearing into
>another opening.
Tom: ...where the roots of a tree had twisted into a
hydroelectric turbine.
> A small pool was in the middle of the room,
>about two and a half meters in diameter, and at least a meter in
>depth.
Mike: Okay, guys, which do you prefer: the lists of ranks and
positions, or this?
[Tom & Crow make "Hmmm..." sounds.]
> "Time to set up the bathing room," Marrissa said.
Crow: [Marrissa] Soon we'll have thousands of Romans paying to
use this place!
> "Clara
>hand me that lantern."
Crow: On the run from evil pirates, scared, tired, hungry - so
naturally, their first priority is a bath.
Tom: Raise high the roofbeam, Scott Carpenter! 'Cuz, see, it's
space and all...
>
>--
>Stephen Ratliff CS Major, Radford University.
Crow: You know, I've always wondered, but where exactly is Radford?
Mike: It's on the East Coast, over by Westford and Seaford.
Crow: Huh. Those names aren't very original.
Mike: Well, the colonists didn't have access to 20th Century
naming technology, like we do.
>srat...@runet.edu Radford, Virginia 24142-7496
>rec.arts.tv.mst3k.misc's polite target. Marrissa Stories Author
>http://www.cs.runet.edu/~sratliff/
>http://www.cs.runet.edu/~sratliff/FAQs/ FAQ Maintainer for ASC.
>http://www.cs.runet.edu/~sratliff/ascindex/ Index Maintainer too.
>also at: http://archive.nu/
>
>"Savor the fruit of life, my young friends.
Crow: Turn into pudding. Bake it in pies. Include it in scented
herbal shampoos.
> It has a sweet taste when
>it is fresh from the vine. But don't live too long.
Mike: Die and decay quickly.
> The taste turns
>bitter after a time." - Kor, ST:DS9 "Once More Unto the Breach"
>From: srat...@runet.edu (Stephen Ratliff)
>Subject: NEW TNG The Field Trip 5/9 [G] (Marrissa Stories)
>Date: 21 Nov 1998 00:00:00 GMT
>Message-ID: <736sol$5...@newslink.runet.edu>
>Organization: Radford University
>Newsgroups: alt.startrek.creative
>
Tom: If you don't have an oxy*less*on, you have...
>
>Title: The Field Trip
>Author: Stephen Ratliff (srat...@runet.edu)
Crow: Still, I'm holding out hope that this story is just
the result of a massive trip that I'm on.
>Series: TNG, Marrissa Stories
>Parts: NEW 5/9
>Rating: [G]
>Codes: n/a
>
>101374
>Chapter Four
>
> Jay was standing on top of the cliff.
Tom: [Kosh] Jump! Jump NOW!
> It had been a climb
>up to the top,
Crow: Something that still surprised Jay.
> but as Marrissa had said, they needed to find out
>if their Enemy was coming down to get them.
Crow: 'Cause if the Enemy does get them, Uncle Screwtape will be
pretty ticked.
> So Jay was scanning
>the sky with his binoculars.
Mike: It's Stephen Ratliff's Rear Plateau!
> Clara was working on a wood and vine
>ladder to make the climb easier.
Tom: [Marrissa]: Hey Clara, you can stop now! I found a helicopter
made out of wind-eroded sandstone!
> Alexander and Shayna were
>trapping the path up against the cliff from the stream.
Mike: Because as any soldier will tell you, walking single-file
along a clearly marked path where the enemy has just gone is
the only safe way to catch a group of fugitives.
> Marrissa
>was setting up the cave while working on lunch.
[All hum "Gilligan's Island" incidental music]
> Jay paused to wipe the sweat off his forehead. It was rather
>warm on the top of the cliff. He had taken off the top of his
>jumpsuit.
All: AAAAAAAAAGGGGGHHHHHHHH!!!!!
Tom: ...a decision he regretted when the hot sun charred his
pale flesh.
> A brief glance down at Alexander, revealed that he had
>done the same.
All: AAAAAAAAAGGGGGHHHHHHHH!!!!!
Mike: Wait, how can you take off half of a jumpsuit?!?
Tom: I dunno, but the thought of - of -
[pause]
All: AAAAAAAAAGGGGGHHHHHHHH!!!!!
> The girls had all switched to white tank top
>tops, probably their underwear, at Marrissa's suggestion.
Mike: Eww. I don't want that mental image.
Crow: Jay later remembered to thank Marrissa for accepting his bribe.
> It was
>hot outside.
Crow: Yet despite this, we all have cold chills of dread running down
our spines at the thought of... of...
All: AAAAAAAAAGGGGGHHHHHHHH!!!!!
> Jay returned to scanning the skies.
Mike: KEEP WATCHING THE SKIES!!!
> A white streak appeared
>on the horizon.
Mike: The Pillsbury Dough Boy has come to their rescue!
> Jay zoomed in as much as he could, hitting
>record on the binoculars.
Mike: He should've just preprogrammed it to record.
Crow: Well, Jay's no electronics whiz - his binoculars are still
flashing "12:00".
> It was an alien shuttlecraft, all
>black with a round cylinder for a main body, and bat-like wings.
Tom: It's Bruce Wayne from "Kingdom Come".
Crow: Or "The Dark Knight Returns".
Tom: Or "DC 1,000,000".
Crow: Or-
Mike: Enough! I'm drowning in comic book references!
Crow & Tom: *Graphic Novels!*
Mike: *whimper*
>Near the outer edge of the wings were yellow spikes which pulsed
>as it descended.
Tom: Oooh! The rare Warp-Capable Lesser Fritillary! Pretty.
Crow: Sigh. I get the feeling that Ratliff's taken an interest
in ornithology.
> Jay yelled down to Clara, "enemy shuttlecraft spotted."
Crow: Flash Gordon approaching!
Tom: Send out War Rocket Ajax to bring back his body!
> "Where's it heading?" Clara yelled back up.
> "The beach I think," Jay said.
Mike: They're being invaded by Frankie & Annette!
> Marrissa exited the cave, apparently hearing Jay's yelling.
Crow: Are you sure he didn't just call her on the pager they made
from grass and dry mud?
>"Jay, watch it until it lands, then come down for lunch," she
>ordered.
>
Tom: [Marrissa] I'd like you to get a good meal in before you get
vaporized.
> Alexander, Shayna, Clara, and Marrissa were sitting together
>in the main chamber. They had just finished their lunch. Clara
>had four tricorders that she had just finished reprogramming.
Crow: She's trying to pick up "Furniture To Go" on The Learning Channel.
>All were shifting uncomfortably on the hard surface of the cave.
Mike: Wait...I think it's a *bad* thing when inanimate objects
start shifting uncomfortably.
Tom: Ahem.
Mike: Oh...sorry.
> "I reprogrammed them, just like you asked," Clara said.
Mike: Now they don't have to pay for their DIVX movies.
>"I'm not sure what good it will do though."
Tom: [Clara] I mean, should we really be playing Quake at a time
like this?
Mike: [Marrissa] You're just mad because I always win.
> "It's our early warning system," Marrissa said, pulling out
>a PADD with a map on it. We'll try to place them at these
>places.
Crow: [Marrissa] Or locate them at these locations.
Mike: [Marrissa] Or redundancy these redundancies.
> Alex,
Tom: [Marrissa] I'll take Quotable Quotes for 500.
> you take these two, I'll take the others."
> "What about the aliens?" Shayna asked.
Tom: [Marrissa] Let 'em get their own tricorders!
> "We'll try to avoid them," Marrissa said.
Mike: Ooh...brilliant. Sun Tzu has nothing on Marrissa.
> "Why are you going?" Clara said. "You're our leader. You
>should say here."
All: Here.
> "We need to get these placed quickly and well hidden,"
>Marrissa said. "Alexander and I are the only two of us who have
>any survival skills.
Mike: I guess the rest of them just melt if left out in the open.
Crow: Still, leaving Jay alone with a bunch of camping supplies is
just asking for trouble.
Tom: [Marrissa] The rest of you are all dead...you just haven't
stopped moving yet.
> I want to limit the chances of anyone being
>captured and increase the chances of us knowing were the enemy
>is.
Crow: Nice way of saying "We're going to look around and try not to
get caught."
> Jay will be in charge until I return.
Mike: [Jay] But I need you to order me around! I have no free will!
> Shayna, relieve him
>from the watch post.
Crow: She'd have to be really agile to do that, wouldn't she?
Tom: Need a strong stomach, too.
Mike & Crow: Ewwww!
> Clara, make sure Jay gets something to eat,
Mike: [Marrissa] Then give him his binky and tuck him in for nap-nap.
>then see about improving our living situation.
Crow: [Marrissa] Alexander! Get a better job! Clara! Get some coupons!
Shayna! Get some spackle and paint and clean this place up!
Jay! We're going to have to sell some of your organs.
> Alexander, let's
>get going."
> Shayna, Marrissa, and Alexander left the cave. Clara,
>meanwhile, began to carefully look over the cave. It had
>possibilities.
>
Tom: [Clara] The TV will be here... the surveillance network
over here... hmm, should we put the antiaircraft guns near the
stereo or would that mess up the reception?
> Jay had just finished his lunch when the PADD beeped and
>began playing an image.
Crow: [Jay] Neat! "Johnny Bravo"'s on!
> There were five PADDs arrayed up against
>the wall between the two sleeping chambers, each of them bearing
>the name of one of the children. It was Jay's that turned on.
Crow: Turn me on, dead PADD.
>Jay's was programmed to receive transmissions from the shuttle.
> The transmission was labeled "Delayed Ten Minutes."
Mike: So...it's more of a *late* warning system.
> The
>view was of the open door of the shuttle. An alien was bending
>down to enter the shuttle.
Mike: He had better not start squealing like a pig.
> His skin was black and his hair was
>yellow and long.
Crow: It's a race of RuPauls!
> As he entered, a fine red mist descended,
Mike: Hey, it's "V" all of a sudden.
>sneezing power.
Tom: [He-Man] BY THE POWER OF...sneezing?!?
> He sneezed, then again, then he went into a
>violent seizure, collapsing to the ground outside the shuttle.
Mike: [Alien] *hackhack* Drat this *gasp* hay *snort* fever
*WHEEEEEEZE*!
>The seizure ended, and the alien remained there, unmoving. Then
>a purple bolt hit him, vaporizing the alien.
Tom: Another purple bolt? TAFKAP must be really trigger happy.
Mike: Ahh...a typical trap set up with elements found in the forest.
> A second one entered, and moved to look in the overhead
>storage.
Tom: [Alien] Dammit, I know I stored my carry-on here somewhere!
> A puff of barely visible mist hit him, stinky scent (a
>perfect addition Shayna's whoopie cushion).
Crow: So a cloud of flatulence just gave him a right hook, then?
> This had no
>immediately noticeable effect.
Tom [Shayna] Damn! I was so proud of that one.
> A third alien entered, moving toward the cockpit. He sat
>down at the co-pilot's seat and attempted to bring up the
>controls. Jay smiled at his frustration. He had locked down the
>controls.
Mike: So neither of them notices their pal's been vaporized?
Crow: [Alien 1] Hey, wasn't Zorgatz here a second ago?
Tom: [Alien 2] Ah, who knows? Let's hotwire this puppy & scram!
> It had taken a while, but it was worth it. The alien
>stopped to scratch his hands.
Tom: He thought he was Dale.
Mike: Wrong season.
> Shayna would be happy to know that
>all of her traps had worked, beyond expectations.
>
Crow: Especially the hand-scratching thing. Absolutely brilliant.
Tom: "When Fourth-Graders Attack"...next on Fox.
> Marrissa was up in a tree
All: K-I-S-S-I-N-G!
> fixing one of the observation
>tricorders into position, when she first heard the noise.
Tom: Her stuffy nose prevented her from smelling the funk.
>Someone was coming.
Mike: In a Ratliff story? Only if they're married.
> Using the other tricorder she had brought
>with her, she quickly determined that it wasn't one of her
>friends.
Crow: Oh, *that* certainly narrows it down!!
> As the sounds got closer, she drew her phaser, and
>pressed herself up against the trunk.
> The alien came into view below her.
Crow: [Marvin the Martian] Oh, drat, where is my Illudium PU-38
Space Modulator?
> As she was about two
>and a half meters up the tree, he would have to look up to see
>her. However, once he did, there was very little chance he'd
>miss her.
All: Hey! Up there! C'mon, fella, look up! Above you, ya knit!
> Marrissa was wearing bright red pants with a white
>tank-top.
Crow: Not the best camouflage, but very stylish!
> In the dark purple foliage she was rather easy to
>spot. Marrissa tried to be as still and make as little noise as
>possible as the alien moved past her.
Tom: Since she was in the middle of an accordion solo, it was
pretty difficult.
> The tall black alien was
>carrying a black hunk of something,
Tom: Burnin' love.
> probably a gun.
Crow: Or it could be fudge.
> As he passed
>beneath the tree and away from the direction of the cave,
>Marrissa noted that his bright yellow hair was held back with two
>ribbons, one red, one gray.
Crow: As usual, Ratliff gives us the attention to clothing we
know and love.
> She stayed up in the tree for five
>minutes after the alien passed. Then she scanned around her.
>Finding nothing, she descended and carefully made her way back to
>the cave.
>
>--
>Stephen Ratliff CS Major, Radford University.
>srat...@runet.edu Radford, Virginia 24142-7496
>rec.arts.tv.mst3k.misc's polite target. Marrissa Stories Author
>http://www.cs.runet.edu/~sratliff/
>http://www.cs.runet.edu/~sratliff/FAQs/ FAQ Maintainer for ASC.
>http://www.cs.runet.edu/~sratliff/ascindex/ Index Maintainer too.
>also at: http://archive.nu/
>
>"Savor the fruit of life, my young friends. It has a sweet taste when
>it is fresh from the vine. But don't live too long. The taste turns
>bitter after a time." - Kor, ST:DS9 "Once More Unto the Breach"
Crow: Kor....the Klingon Morrissey.
>From: srat...@runet.edu (Stephen Ratliff)
>Subject: NEW TNG The Field Trip 6/9 [G] (Marrissa Stories)
>Date: 24 Nov 1998 00:00:00 GMT
>Message-ID: <73df9i$l...@newslink.runet.edu>
>Organization: Radford University
>Newsgroups: alt.startrek.creative
>
>
>Title: The Field Trip
>Author: Stephen Ratliff (srat...@runet.edu)
>Series: TNG, Marrissa Stories
>Parts: NEW 6/9
>Rating: [G]
>Codes: n/a
>101374
Mike: Stephen must into this whole "Born-on dating" craze.
>Chapter Five
>
> Clara was relaxing in the warm pool in the bathing chamber.
>They'd chose to set up the room Japanese style,
Tom: With a collapsing economy?
Crow: Mostly American with some traditional features?
Tom: With the highest teen suicide rate in the world?
Crow: With lots of ex-American baseball players?
Tom: With Gamera attacking every few minutes?
Crow: With big-eyed porn cartoons?
Mike: Okay, guys, I think we’ve punished the Japanese enough.
Crow: Says you, Mike!
Tom: Yeah, you only had to endure two of those stinkballs! We
still carry scars from “Time of the Apes” and "Fugitive Alien"!
> wash under the
>cold waterfall then soak for a while in the pool. A rock had
>been heated and tossed in to warm the pool, which was now a
>comfortable 95 degrees F.
Mike: ...for the five or six seconds before the rock cooled off and
the pool became ice-cold.
Crow: Musta been a helluva big rock!
Tom: Yeah, and fish are dying by the thousands from the sudden
temperature shift!
> If you didn't count the crash landing,
>and the aliens chasing after you,
Mike: Suddenly the kids are Benny Hill.
> life was good.
Crow: Of course! Everyone had ice cream! And lots of it!
> Aside from
>having that annoying tune from the Lion King running though your
>head that is.
Tom: Well, how about if songs from "Great Illusions" were
running through your head?
Mike: [Puzzled] Like what?
Crow: Mike! No!
Tom: Like, o/~ I'm sailing away.... o/~
Crow: NO!
Mike: [To Servo] Got him again.
Tom: Yep.
Crow: ...setanopencoursetotheviriginsea....
> Clara was next to last. The boys had had the room first.
Tom: Is that legal in Marrissa's matriarchal regime?
>Tomorrow they'd do something to divide the room into male and
>female.
Tom: So Stephen has basically turned Roddenberry's liberal Utopia
into Victorian England?
Mike: Yup, pretty much.
Crow: ...theskieshesaidcomesailawaycomesailawaycomesailawaywithme.
[Pants] I hate you, Tom.
> Clara was already working on an idea.
Mike: It involved a genie and a magic lamp.
Crow: No, don't say that - that might be all the cue they need here
to break into a rousing chorus of "Arabian Nights"!
Tom: [Clara] We'll cryogenically freeze ourselves and wait until
the cave naturally erodes away four separate shower stalls!
> Marrissa's voice floated down the passage to the bathing
>chamber. "Can I join you Clara?" she said.
Crow: Oh, God, no.
> "Go right ahead," Clara said. "Just don't let the boys come
>down."
Tom: o/~ Buffalo boys don't you come down tonight... o/~
> "Don't worry, they're busy," Marrissa said, as she entered
>the room. As she undressed, she continued.
Mike: Oh, no - no more, please, no!! Ratliff's either out to blind us or
get us on a morals rap!
Crow: It's Jim Henson's Porno Babies!
Tom: Another naked Marrissa scene? Mike, I want you to promise me
you'll shut me down if there's ever another one.
Crow: Me first.
> "Alexander left a
>couple communicators around where our alien friends camped, and
>Shayna is giving them a concert."
Tom: Coming soon, Shayna! Live at Red Rocks! With special
guest, The John Tesh the XXVIIth Project.
> Marrissa walked over to the waterfall and began washing.
Mike: Out, out damn spot...
>"Her haunting rendition of the Battle Hymn of the Republic is no
>doubt keeping them awake."
Mike: She's playing that on a harmonica? Isn't that a war crime?
Crow: They're obviously too dense to just find the communicators
and either blast them, or trace the beam back to the source.
Mike: Well, they *are* Ratliff villains , so...
Crow: So they *are* that stupid. Right.
> Marrissa flipped back her long blond
>hair after letting the water run though it for a while, sending a
>spray of water arching behind her.
Mike: Sounds like she's coming down with Supermodelitis.
> Clara was jealous of
>Marrissa's hair.
Crow: And her ability to accumulate followers like cat hair
on a sweater.
> Clara's hair had been brown when she was little
>and was gradually darkening. People liked girls with light
>colored hair, like Marrissa.
Mike: Mary and Laura Ingalls in the 24th-and-a-half century!
> In fact Marrissa had it all.
Crow: And Marrissa explains it all! Thank you.
> She
>was already developing breasts, and she was only ten.
[All groan]
Crow: *Much* too much information, Stephen!
Tom: Okay, we surrender, just - no more of this, please!
> Clara
>hoped she would be as pretty when she was older. She sighed.
> "Something wrong, Clara?" Marrissa said.
Tom: Yes! Everything about that last sentence was wrong!
Everything in the world is wrong! Ratliff has killed all
that is good and decent!
> "I wish I was as pretty as you," Clara commented.
> "I'm not that pretty," Marrissa said, as she sat down to
>wash her feet.
Tom : o/~ Try not to get worried, try not to hold onto, problems
that upset you...o/~
Crow: So, Stephen's moved onto Andrew Lloyd Weber.
Mike: Yep. Still, the cameo by Ted Neeley and Carl Anderson
should be good.
Crow: True.
> "My hair is like straw,
Mike: Ray Bolger *IS* Marrissa!
> I'm starting to have acne
>problems, and to make matters worse, everyone thinks I'm dumb
>because I'm a blonde."
Mike: Hey! What have you done with the *real* Marrissa?
Crow: Yeah, Marrissa, it's really held back your progress so far.
Tom: Sheesh, what would a *brunette* 10 year old have done for
the Science Fair?
> "Everyone thinks blondes are pretty," Clara said.
Mike: Yeah, that Linda Tripp is a fox.