> Reasons I will never be a successful Semi-Hostess:
> 1) My boobs are far too pert
> 2) My back-story is insufficiently tragic
> 3) My annunciation, while not great, has not yet descended to the level
> where I’ll make something out of “strawburries” and “shremp bisk” and
> then declare that it’s “theck an’ retch an’ sodalishus.”
> 4) I just can’t make a good tablescape:

> I mean, look at that. I threw as much crap at it as I could stand. I
> made a pedestal out of an overturned salad bowl, flung fake rose petals
> on it, and covered it with all the Sandra related stuff I could scrounge
> up. And yet, there’s still room for the food.

> I am a failure.

> A few things to point out—while you can’t see her, Sandra Lee Barbie
> from last year is perched inside the memoir, but wearing a new red and
> white outfit to match this year’s theme. The heart shaped votive holders
> were 2 for $1 in the discount section of Target, where I also got the
> red plastic table cloth. The sheer is made from regular old mosquito
> netting curtain that I had lying around the house. I didn’t even finish
> the edges—if you could see the bottom of it, you’d notice the pocket for
> the curtain rod.

> If you haven’t guessed already, we had another ,
> roughly a year after the first such endeavor. This year was worse in
> some ways and better in others.

> http://jordanbaker.blogspot.com/2008/02/aint-no-party-like-sandra-par...