The longer version:
     If Raksha really meant for all of us Transfans to "think for
ourselves", hold our OWN opinions and remain "true" to our OWN
convictions, then she would just agree to disagree and let that be
that. If she applied the slogan, "Never compromise yourself" to any-
body else but her, then she would not have ended a five-year long
friendship over a changed opinion about a f*#king cartoon character--
which, incidentally, she did to me one year ago when she discovered
that suddenly I had changed my mind about her little romance between
Megatron and Nightbird. Anybody remember my essay, "Resolution
Revised"? Here's what she said to me about it, that nobody here on
ATT had the pleasure of seeing:

        So late Friday night I knocked on her door. Vulcana opened it,
and I addressed Raksha, who was sitting on the end of the bed, looking
over slides that apparently dealt with her herpetology work. Note that
most of this conversation is as close to verbatim as I could possibly
get it.
        "We need to talk. And not about Transformers."
            She continued looking at her slides, responding very curtly.
"I'm busy."
        I looked at Vulcana, who was busily gathering up Avatar to put
her to bed. The only other person in the room was Straxus, slumped in a
chair on the other side of the bed. I asked him if he was okay, to which
he casually responded, "Oh, just tired." He said nothing else the entire
time I was there, nor did Vulcana.
            That established, I repeated myself. "Like I said, we need
to talk--not about Autobots, Decepticons, Cybertron, or any of that. I
want to talk about you and I agreeing to disagree and being friend
again."
        Raksha finally looked up. "It's a little late for that, Tut."
        "Why? Why is it 'too late'?"
        She put her slides down. "Because you attacked me, when you put
that garbage--that absolute _garbage_ on the group, turning against
everything that we stood and fought for! How dependable can I expect you
to be, if you turn around and attack me and slander the Decepticons and
Nightbird like that?"
         I didn't appreciate my writing being referred to that way, but
that wasn't my biggest concern. I had hoped to talk civilly about
friendship, not an opinion about Megatron or Nightbird or whoever else.
But I rapidly figured out that was not to be.
        "I changed my mind, Raksha. Look, Robert said himself that it's
a threadworn cliche, but people change. What I feel about you didn't
change, only my opinion of the characters."
        "But how could you say you like someone, then turn completely
around and say that they're an example of what not to be?" In all
honesty, I don't remember every word she said because she tended to
repeat herself on the same points; she said something about the
Decepticons not being evil, and how could you consider them "wrong" for
wanting to clear humans out of the way and take Earth for themselves,
and she emphatically stated that Nightbird was a living being, and a
Decepticon. She also added that the Decepticons had qualities to look up
to, and that she saw Optimus Prime as a complete hypocrite.
        "In your universe, of course, but not in mine," I responded.
"There's nothing wrong with your opinions, but I have the right to mine.
We all have our own different versions of the Transformers' universe."
        She responded each time I offered the point of individual
versions of the mythos with a distinctive sneer and a short, dirisive
sort of laugh. Actually, she responded to a lot of what I said in that
manner. She asked me if I'd even watched the episodes of the cartoon,
and I told her matter-of-factly that I watched every tape that _she_ had
made for me. After a few minutes she finally said, "Go to Hell, Tut."
        I started for the door. "I'll see you there," I spat back.
        "You think you will."
        "Oh, I _know_ I will."
        At this point she said something--I don't even remember what it
was, I was so angry--all I remember is turning around, slamming the door
shut behind me, and continuing the argument with renewed vigor. Again,
we covered the point of whether or not the Decepticons are evil: I said
that from their own point of view they're not, but from a human or
Autobot p.o.v. of course they are; she then accused me of trying to
"sneak" posts onto ATTCM by getting other people to post them even after
I'd been rejected, to which my defense was that I'd been having trouble
with my account and wanted help making sure that my server wasn't at
fault for the problems. I apologized for the fact that I'd spoken
angrily about her on ATT back in December, which now I almost wish I
hadn't apologized for, because she only proved me right. In a
contemptuous tone she mentioned something about she'd heard that I now
like Beast Wars, and the "Pretender to the Name", and how I probably
liked him for the exact same reasons she hated him. I most certainly did
not appreciate having my viewpoints belittled, and if I could have had
the savvy to make one smartass response, it would have been to the
accusation about 'I bet you like him for the same reasons I hate him'--
I'd've simply intoned, "Yeessssss...." Too bad I didn't.
        Continuing on, she tried to debate the point about Optimus Prime
leaving Elita-One behind on Cybertron to 'protect'  her, and how that
was not something to aspire to do as I had said in my essays. I made
only a brief attempt to counter that argument, because again, my whole
intent was NOT to argue about Transformers in the first place. But
again, she could argue about nothing else. She then made another
accusation about me saying in my essays that my 'sources' about
Nightbird were 'stupid' and that I was therefore attacking her outright.
I countered that I did no such thing--for one, I did not mention her
work,  nor her name, anywhere in my essay. She snarled something in
response about, "Come on, Tut, everybody knows who started the idea". I
maintained my innocence; I hadn't been on the TF newsgroups as long as
she had, and had no way of knowing that she was the very first person to
say Nightbird was sentient or in love with Megatron. Nor did I ever say
that my fanfic sources were "stupid". If I had meant to say something
was a piece of s#@t, I told her, then I would have used those exact
words.
        In any case, I continued, and said that my opinions had changed
because a lot of things had happened in my life, and she'd never given
me the chance to explain myself, something I would've been glad to do.
Her response, which I remember her saying at least twice, struck me as
particularly audacious:
        "The Decepticons didn't cause your parents' divorce, Tut." This
coming from somebody whose own parents divorced when she was twelve. So
I shot back:
        "No, the Decepticons didn't cause my parents' divorce, nor did
they cause yours'. The Autobots didn't cause your parents' divorce
either, and Optimus Prime did not stand over you while your father
molested you as a child!"
        Typical sneer in response. "My father didn't molest me as a
child; where did you get that?"
        "It's a logical conclusion. Why else do you hate men?"
        "I don't hate men."
        "Oh yeah, well if you don't hate men, then explain to me why
you're thirty years old and never even been kissed?"
        "That's not true--see, you're making assumptions again. You're
making this up."
        I folded my arms. "Well, if you have, then you could give me
names. Tell me who it was."
        "I don't have to tell you. I'm not obligated to tell you any
details about my personal life."
--Now, I'll admit right now that I might be wrong. But I've known Raksha
for five years, spoken to her over email, snail mail and the phone, and
even had her as a guest in my home. We've had numerous private
conversations, certainly enough to support my educated guess. If Daddy
didn't do something to make her so bitter, then somebody did.
        Apparently she decided to counter with her own accusation--which
frankly, I anticipated hearing at some point. "How much does Daryn have
to do with all this? I mean, why all this about Optimus Prime and the
humans being right?"
        "Daryn had nothing to do with it. I watched the episodes and
came up with this on my own."
        "Oh, and what were you _doing_ when you watched the episodes?"
        "We watched them 'with our eyes open'."
        "And what was _he_ doing while you were watching the episodes?"
        "He was watching them with me."
        From here on, it was pretty much the verbal equivelent of tires
spinning in deep mud. I had tried to keep the conversation away from the
same tired arguments about the Transformers, but she was to have none of
it.
        "How could you turn against everything we've been fighting for
all these years?" she finally demanded, for probably the second or third
time.
        "Look, Raksha, I didn't see us as _fighting_ for anything. I was
on the newsgroup expressing my own opinions, and I thought you were
mature enough to base a friendship on more than just an opinion about a
f*#king cartoon. Besides, the only time I actively argued the same
points as you was briefly on ATT during the summer of 1995. A lot's
happened to me since then."
        "Yeah," she finally seemed ready to humor me, "like what?"
        Frankly, that's a lot to squeeze into fifteen seconds. Nobody
can do that. I just said, "Well, I was younger then, and looking back I
don't think I conducted myself that well on the newsgroup--in fact, I've
gone back and apologized to a couple of people for it. I've gotten
older, and I've grown since then."
        "Grown?!" she echoed with audible scorn. I could tell that
trying to explain a damned thing would have been pointless. She was set
in her own mind, and the only thing left for me to do was hear out of
her own mouth, once and for all, what the truth really was. So I asked
her:
        "So, your opinions about the Decepticons are the only correct
ones?"
        "Not necessarily."
        "Okay. But, in as many words, your opinion about Nightbird is
the only correct one?"
        "Yes."
        "I changed my mind, Raksha."
        "You slandered the Decepticons!"
            "So you have no use for anybody who changes their mind?"
        "I have no use for anyone who slanders the Decepticons."
        "Alright," I said, deciding that I'd had quite enough. "I see
what you base your friendships on. So, yes or no, Raksha--am I your
friend?"
        We were sitting across from each other on the bed, and I could
look her in the face and see the hazel color in her eyes as she very
simply said, "No."
        "You are f&#king shallow, Raksha." I got up. There was nothing
else to be done here.
        "If that's what you think."
        "You ended this friendship, not me."
        "You ended it when you wrote your essay."
        "Because YOU decided that was basis to end it," I snapped as I
walked out the door.
        SLAM.

        Folks, if this doesn't illustrate plainly enough, I don't know
what will. Raksha  bases her friendships on whether or not you agree
with her about the Decepticons, and if you associate with her, then she
thinks that you're telling her she's right. Whether or not that's what
you wish to tell her, I leave to you, but remember that a true friend
is not somebody from whom you have to withold your beliefs about
anything. And for the record, I won't judge anybody on a simple matter
of opinion--especially over a cartoon.

       --Oh, and Skyflight, since I *know* you're going to have to
say SOMETHING to defend your would-be girlfriend, know this: I'm not
out to "get" Raksha, I'm out to tell people the truth about her. She
just happened to give it to me in plain English. I gave her as many
chances as I could, but she didn't want them. So I'm just letting
my fellow "sheep" and "cesspool"-mates know about it.

     Some call me a traitor, but I never betrayed myself. I dared to
be myself.
                                              --Tut

 LONG LIVE ATT.