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Fun with Mr. Gerbil

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Big Red Dog

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Feb 14, 1994, 5:30:14 PM2/14/94
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"In retrospect, lighting the match was my mistake. But I was only
trying to retrieve the gerbil." Vito Bustone told doctors in the
severe burns unit of Salt Lake City Hospital.
Bustone, and his homosexual partner Kikki Rodriguez, had been
admitted for emergency treatment after a felching session had gone
seriously wrong. "I pushed the cardboard tube up his rectum and slipped
Faggot, our gerbil, in," He explained. "As usual, Kikki shouted
'Armageddon.' my cue that he'd had enough. I tried to retrieve Faggot
but he wouldn't come out again, so I peered into the tube and struck a
match, thinking the light might attract him."
At a hushed press conference, a hospital spokesman described what
had happened next. "The flame ignited a pocket of intestinal gas and a
flame shot up the tube igniting Mr. Bustone's mustache and severely
burning his face. It also set fire to the gerbil's fur and whiskers
which, in turn, ignited a larger pocket of gas further up the intestine
propelling the rodent out like a cannonball."
Bustone suffered second degree burnes and a broken nose from the
impact of the gerbil, while Rodriguez suffered first and second degree
burns to his anus and lower intestinal tract. Sheriff Hugo Root later
told reporters:"It's Faggot I feel sorry for. Being stuffed up some
queer's trademan's entrance."

-cliff

Jeffrey D. Angus

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Feb 17, 1994, 2:06:02 AM2/17/94
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In article <2jou1m$9...@portal.gmu.edu> ckri...@mason1.gmu.edu writes:

> Bustone suffered second degree burnes and a broken nose from the
> impact of the gerbil, while Rodriguez suffered first and second degree
> burns to his anus and lower intestinal tract. Sheriff Hugo Root later
> told reporters:"It's Faggot I feel sorry for. Being stuffed up some
> queer's trademan's entrance."
>
> -cliff

Bzzzzt! Thank you for playing "Newbies!" with us Cliff. And now, for a
chance at the prize behind door 3, can you repost the scrotum self-repair
story.


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