The next level
Douglas D. Anderson
problem is to learn English as it is spoken. For example, a poor
Chinaman suffers mental hardship and privation to learn the meaning
of the word "probably". Unfortunately, he never hears the word
spoken. He needs further training to learn that when he hears either
"probly" or "prolly", it is the word he _thought_ they had told him was
"probably". Our entire language is like this, from complex expressions
like "kudackchuhly", as in, "they said the car kudackchuhly do 0-60
in 12 secnz", to simple questions like "Jeet?", to which appropriate
answers might be "Nachet..." or "yeah", or "I'm not really hungry."
Then imagine his consternation when he is stopped in the street by
two young people in cheap suits who ask him "Yubin saved?" The
poor fellow can only ask what they mean, to which they reply
perhaps "Joo bleevinjeezus? Yubin saved?"
Pollywolly
"Douglas D. Anderson" <d...@rr.rochester.com> wrote in message
news:YtTBa.5265$Cn....@twister.nyroc.rr.com...
Alas - the lack of good diction can cause such problems
>
marvin
"Pollywolly" <polly...@ihug.com.au> wrote in message
news:bb91op$9a3$1...@lust.ihug.co.nz...
nerds find this interesting?
--
marvin (:-
'coons and niggers run away'
Pollywolly
"marvin" <mar...@pissoff.com> wrote in message
news:3ed82736$0$19403$afc3...@news.optusnet.com.au...
I like nerds - they're tangy and nice to crunch
The Return Of GP
--
http://www.geocities.com/mystacy/atjfaq.htm
http://www.mystacy.com/fagboymel/melmorph.html
"marvin" <mar...@pissoff.com> wrote in message
news:3ed82736$0$19403$afc3...@news.optusnet.com.au...
>
too bad you're a queer roo banger.
Although we were being married in New Hampshire, I wanted to add a touch
of my home state, Kansas, to the wedding.
My fiancée, explaining this to a friend, said that we were planning to
have wheat rather than rice thrown after the ceremony.
Our friend thought for a moment. Then he said solemnly, "It's a good
thing she's not from Idaho."
The Return of Mel
in message <vuqidvgf6thq79c1l...@4ax.com>:
>Ironically, Spit may have had a point about 'traditional' Christianity.
spitfire doesn't have any points worth writing on a piece of shit paper and
wiping your arse with.
>I've
>been reading in this thing for a few days now:
>http://www.revelations-unsealed.com/acts/acts1.htm
>If this is correct (and from checking different passages, I'm pretty sure it
>is), the whole of Christianity has been blinded by the Antichrist from day one..
>..Catholics, Baptists, Charismatics, Lutherans, etc.. ALL have the wrong Bible,
>a Bible whose entire middle of the New Testament is littered with the "bible" of
>the Antichrist. I was actually looking for a quote about Jesus to mess with
>Spitfire and his crusade against Dubya, our duly elected President, when I
>inadvertantly ran into this. Thanks to Spitfire, more people might end up
>knowing about Jesus, His true plan for salvation, and the blatant errors of the
>current Bible. Spitfire may end up being soley responsible for bringing the
>TRUTH of the _real_ Bible to millions of souls worldwide that will have a direct
>impact on their entire salvation and closeness with God, the Creator of the
>universe..
i've read some of that claptrap since following your link.
it is bullshit. total bullshit. it is complete and utter tripe.
that site is published by a 12 step cult member. he uses the jargon of the
12 step cult (e.g. "people pleaser", "powerless") and promotes participation
in the 12 step cult for everyone in order to take on the 12 step beliefs and
way of thinking about things. his whole diatribe is littered with the jargon
of 12 steppism.
[ an aside: the founder of AA (Bill Wilson) claimed a "Damascus road"
experience:
http://www.revelations-unsealed.com/acts/acts2.htm
:By contrast, Bill Wilson, the founder of Alcoholics Anonymous, and Melody
:Beattie, the author of the book Codependent No More,--both of whom had
:their Spiritual Awakenings in the form of the Lord's appearance in light
[...]
:Worthy of mentioning again is that Jesus did not make His appearance to Paul
:that day the same way that He appeared to Bill Wilson, Melody Beattie, and
:all the other people whose Spiritual Awakenings are legitimate and occur by
:means of seeing the Lord in a vision of light.
does anyone believe that these folks had a genuine Damascus road experience?
I mean, come on. That is pure bullshit. And yet the whole worldwide 12 step
movement is based on a man who claimed that. <laughter track>
clearly both these folks were lying bastards. they started a new world
religion (based on the 12 step program which forms the spiritual foundation
of all the anonymous 12 step groups) and claimed some divine event. this is
common amongst cults. and gullible folks slurp that shit up.
the greatest travesty is that the US government has inveigled itself with
this dangerous cult which is spreading worldwide. 12 step cult members are
in positions of authority and they started the practice (in the US) of
court-ordering addicts into the 12 step program. which contravenes the US
separation of state from religion because courts are ordering people to
accept a dangerous religious cult as cure for their addiction. and this is
all justified because drugs are such a "clear and present danger" to
American society. drugs are a problem, but the "cure" is worse.
why do i state that the 12 step cult is dangerous? because it's central
message (which is stated in the first step) assures the person (with a drug
problem or whatever other problem) that they are powerless to do anything
about it (themselves) and need God's help and, more importantly, the group's
help to overcome it. thus they attempt to ensnare people. and this into a
group which is effective in helping less than 5% of people with drug
problems. 5% is actually less than the spontaneous remission rate (people
quitting drugs on their own bat). what that means quite simply is that NA
hinders rather than helps people with drug problems. ]
many of his points appear very weak, if not spurious even.
he also heavily criticises Christians and calls them silly names (e.g.
"Christendumb"). He also refers to Christians as "xians" which is derogatory
and derisive. this strikes me as being directly at odds with his stated
stance of being in favour of the teachings of Christ.
I'll quote one paragraph to make my point clear:
URL: http://www.revelations-unsealed.com/acts/acts4.htm
quoted paragraph:
:When one considers all the great intellectual theologians, past and present,
:who have accepted both stories as being true, we catch at least a glimpse
:of why God says the Christians are sick, sick, sick (666) in the head
where does God say such a thing? this is pure bullshit sucked out of the
author's arse. Equating 666 with "sick sick sick" is pure foolishness.
The author basically believes that Christians are sick in the head. That's a
nasty generalisation. and untrue.
:living in La-La Land oblivious to reality, the way things really are. Their
:denial and delusion is severe."
the words "denial" and "delusion" are common 12 step parlance and have no
basis in reality. it is a way of defaming and shaming folks that is very
common in the 12 step cult.
this is a guy who believes in a made up Higher Power and is now talking out
of his arsehole.
this is not a site worth taking seriously. although it makes for interesting
reading since I always enjoy a good conspiracy yarn (one of the reasons I
enjoy reading David Icke - http://www.davidicke.com).
--
smash yer modem, reboot, kill yerself
http://atjfaq.shorturl.com
ur_droll
"The Return of Mel" <m...@mel.com> wrote in message
news:h37kdvont3l6aab0o...@4ax.com...
: On Sun, 01 Jun 2003 02:56:48 GMT, "ŃšS-|-MŠ" <mĆŠMĮ×¹@ÅsSremover.com>
maxie is a follower...... he needs direction in his life
Vanilla Gorilla (Monkey Boy)
wrote in alt.tasteless.jokes:
>this is not a site worth taking seriously. although it makes for interesting
>reading since I always enjoy a good conspiracy yarn (one of the reasons I
>enjoy reading David Icke - http://www.davidicke.com).
In that case, I think you would enjoy a book I've been reading,
"Bushwhacked: Inside Stories of True Conspiracy" -- by Uri Dowbenko
Just be forewarned, it's quite terrible. Since buying a new copy only
supports and encourages more such idiocy, I would urge you to look for
one in your local used book store, or a library. Basically, Uri never
met a conspiracy he didn't love, no matter how thoroughly or
frequently it has been debunked.
Most kooks will focus in on one or two, and make those the central
theses of their lives, but not Uri. According to him, they're ALL
true. JFK, MLK, complete global political corruption, "the
Corporate-Media Propaganda Conglomerate",
Illuminati-Freemason-Bilderbergers, UN/CFR/MAFIA/CIA/NSA/NASA/ONI
Assassin Goon Squads, mind-control beams, Nibiru/Planet X, reptilian
aliens in the European Royalty, interdimensional beings, Annunaki and
Nephalim, all of it. The "rock-and-roll formula" was lifted directly
from Sumerian cuneiform tablets, and used as a mind-control technique
to make Western Youth want to take drugs and have sex, as if they
didn't already. And, to "back up" his assertions, he ends up quoting
just about every other kook that has come down the pike in the last
300 years. I think he skipped Nostradamus, but that's about the only
one I can think of. Naturally, in amongst such alleged luminaries as
Elizabeth Claire Profit, Zachariah Sitchin, Targ & Puthoff, there's
Icke, big as life and twice as dumb.
There are Commies, Nazis, and Fascists around every corner, and under
every bed. Except for Uri and a small handful of other Truth
Warriors, we are all a bunch of brainwashed, mindless
sheeple-drone-robot-slaves, subsisting on little more than McDonald's
and Must See TV.
Then, for no apparent reason, right in the middle of his endless
stream of conspiracies, there's a chapter about the Montessori
Schools, of which he appears to be in complete support. I kept
waiting for him to reveal Satanic Child Sacrifice rituals, or some
connection to the New World Order, the Roman Catholic Church, the IMF,
space aliens, or some other global evil force, but he never did.
That's just a sampling of what you'll find in there. There's lots
more. The bibliography alone for this book is enough to keep you
buried neck-deep in kookdom for at least a year. I don't have the
stomach for that much, but "it's all there." I also kept waiting for
him to reveal some kooky "Grand Theory of Everything" to tie it all
together, but if he did, I must have missed it. Parts of what he says
are verified facts, other parts are probably true, too, but they are
buried in so much unmitigated bullshit that it just comes out as the
ravings of a nuttier-than-average lunatic, complete with all the usual
kooky slurs, catch-phrases, and Random Capitalizations.
Hey, if someone doesn't have anything to start with, what's the point
of suing them for slander? Take away his Radio Shack cassette
recorder, his Underwood manual typewriter, and his Chrysler K-Car?
Total value: $250.
--
V.G.
"People are more violently opposed to fur than leather, because it is eaiser to harrass rich women than it is motorcycle gangs." - Bumper Sticker
(This sig file contains not less than 80% recycled SPAM)
Sarcasm is my sword, Apathy is my shield.
The Return Of GP
--
http://www.geocities.com/mystacy/atjfaq.htm
http://www.mystacy.com/fagboymel/melmorph.html
"ur_droll" <Ch...@xtra.co.nz> wrote in message
news:T1uCa.4630$JA5....@news.xtra.co.nz...
you better get your directions straight kiwi.
There once was a little green man living in a little green house on the top
of
a little green hill. One day the little green man wanted to take a bath so
he
went and took his little green bottle of shampoo and his little green bar of
soap and also his little green towel and into his little green bathroom he
went. As he took off his little green shirt and his little green pair of
shorts, he stepped under his little green tap and started to bathe. Just
then a
saleswoman came to the front of the little green man's house and rang on his
little green bell. "Ting Dong". The little green man heard his little green
bell and he thought that his pizza had arrived so he hastily took his little
green towel, wrapped it around his little green waist and rushed to the
door.
As he opened his little green door, his little green towel came undone, and
dropped unto his little green doormat, exposing his little green, uh...never
mind. The saleswoman gave a shriek and rushed out of the little green house.
In
all her haste and all her horror, she did not see the Truck coming at 120
mph
which struck her, killing her on the spot.
Q: The Moral of the Story?
A: DON'T CROSS THE ROAD WHEN THE LITTLE GREEN MAN IS FLASHING
>
>
The Return of Mel
<vgor...@pobox.alaska.net> wrote in message
<abpkdvklknou4ur5g...@4ax.com>:
i think you had more fun typing that out than i had reading it.
Vanilla Gorilla (Monkey Boy)
wrote in alt.tasteless.jokes:
Probably.
Spitfire
>
> On Sat, 31 May 2003 01:23:04 GMT, Douglas D. Anderson hurled
> <YtTBa.5265$Cn....@twister.nyroc.rr.com> into the abyss of alt.tasteless.jokes,
> where it constantly lurks, whines, and trolls, crapping on society with 16
> bandwidth-killing lines of moronic idiocy...
> been reading in this thing for a few days now:
>
> http://www.revelations-unsealed.com/acts/acts1.htm
>
> If this is correct (and from checking different passages, I'm pretty sure it
> is), the whole of Christianity has been blinded by the Antichrist from day one..
>
> ..Catholics, Baptists, Charismatics, Lutherans, etc.. ALL have the wrong Bible,
> a Bible whose entire middle of the New Testament is littered with the "bible" of
> the Antichrist. I was actually looking for a quote about Jesus to mess with
> Spitfire and his crusade against Dubya, our duly elected President, when I
> inadvertantly ran into this. Thanks to Spitfire, more people might end up
> knowing about Jesus, His true plan for salvation, and the blatant errors of the
> current Bible. Spitfire may end up being soley responsible for bringing the
> TRUTH of the _real_ Bible to millions of souls worldwide that will have a direct
> impact on their entire salvation and closeness with God, the Creator of the
> universe..
That should REALLY scare ya.
--
Spitfire
You done yet?
Spitfire
That's why this administration is so fun, you don't even need to
be a "conspiracy theory" nut, you can just read the news and see
for yourself the lies and corruption,....they've even started to
brag about it.
The Return of Mel
<vgor...@pobox.alaska.net> wrote in message
<6moldvk98uasnqm55...@4ax.com>:
>On Mon, 02 Jun 2003 03:30:25 +0200, The Return of Mel <m...@mel.com>
>wrote in alt.tasteless.jokes:
>>On Sun, 01 Jun 2003 13:40:00 -0800, "Vanilla Gorilla (Monkey Boy)"
i hope i didn't offend you.
johnreyn...@yahoo.com
think?
At the very least, the Prosecution should be charged with contempt of
court, for leaking autopsy records. Geragos is too much of a gentleman
to charge the Rocha's for burglarizing the Peterson home.
The prosecution was trying to paint the picture that the poor Rocha
family represented the sympathetic victims while the Peterson's were
the so mean, that they even denied the Rocha family the opportunity to
collect Laci's things.
The plot to demonize the Peterson family was right on cue, but the
Prosecution's creepy scheme fell apart because they were trying to put
out two fires at the same time. Detective David Sween had frequently
indicated that gunfire was the main cause of death and the compelling
suggestion that Laci was shot in the head by her captor created a
frenzy in the office of the Prosecution. Somebody invariably suggested
that they could use the autopsy to dispel the rumor that Laci was shot
in the head and that is why the Prosecutor's Office defied a court
order and leaked the autopsy records. The Prosecution is absolutely
desperate and their conduct is absolutely criminal.
It doesn't pay to try to replace the truth with a sleazy, publicity
campaign.
Scott "did it" people cannot simply explain away the simple facts:
According to the case timeline, Scott left at 9:30am to the Marina he
produced a time-stamped receipt.. Several neighbors saw Laci walking
the dog that morning. At 10:30am a neighbor found Laci's dog with a
muddy leash wandering in the street... If Laci did not walk the dog, a
neighbor would not have found him wandering in the street with his
muddy leash at 10:30am while Scott was traveling to the Berkeley
Marina. Nobody saw a dog wandering the streets other than the neighbor
that found him, therefore the dog was evidently alone in the street
for a very short time, confirming the exact time that Laci was
kidnapped.
http://www.1st.shorturl.com
mel
wrote in message <df7mdv4bn3qtlgt7l...@4ax.com>:
>On Sun, 01 Jun 2003 13:40:00 -0800, Vanilla Gorilla (Monkey Boy) hurled
><abpkdvklknou4ur5g...@4ax.com> into the abyss of
>alt.tasteless.jokes, where it constantly lurks, whines, and trolls, crapping on
and one of them wrote that revelations-unsealed.com site. except she is
Satan-in-the-flesh but also gradually becomes demon possessed.
have you read that shit? and realised how the author contradicts herself
while picking at threads in the New Testament that supposedly are
contradictions?
mel
wrote in message <nj6mdvs0k6jedic4r...@4ax.com>:
>On Sun, 01 Jun 2003 17:48:10 +0200, The Return of Mel hurled
><h37kdvont3l6aab0o...@4ax.com> into the abyss of
>alt.tasteless.jokes, where it constantly lurks, whines, and trolls, crapping on
>>On Sun, 01 Jun 2003 02:56:48 GMT, "ŃšS-|-MŠ" <mĆŠMĮ×¹@ÅsSremover.com> wrote
>>spitfire doesn't have any points worth writing on a piece of shit paper and
>>wiping your arse with.
i'm an illegal alien. i'm an englishman in cape town.
>>>I've
>>>been reading in this thing for a few days now:
>>>http://www.revelations-unsealed.com/acts/acts1.htm
>>>If this is correct (and from checking different passages, I'm pretty sure it
>>>is), the whole of Christianity has been blinded by the Antichrist from day one..
>>>..Catholics, Baptists, Charismatics, Lutherans, etc.. ALL have the wrong Bible,
>>>a Bible whose entire middle of the New Testament is littered with the "bible" of
>>>the Antichrist. I was actually looking for a quote about Jesus to mess with
>>>Spitfire and his crusade against Dubya, our duly elected President, when I
>>>inadvertantly ran into this. Thanks to Spitfire, more people might end up
>>>knowing about Jesus, His true plan for salvation, and the blatant errors of the
>>>current Bible. Spitfire may end up being soley responsible for bringing the
>>>TRUTH of the _real_ Bible to millions of souls worldwide that will have a direct
>>>impact on their entire salvation and closeness with God, the Creator of the
>>>universe..
>>i've read some of that claptrap since following your link.
>>it is bullshit. total bullshit. it is complete and utter tripe.
>I thought so too until I took out a Bible and started looking at the proofs it
>was referring to..
i'm not about to overhaul my religious beliefs after reading that web site.
the chick is a loon. with an axe to grind. her animosity towards Christians
is blatant.
contempt oozes out of every pore of her body. that contempt does not come
from God. that anger and that belittling of Christians is something else.
it's the outpourings of a mad woman.
she contradicts herself several times.
>>that site is published by a 12 step cult member. he uses the jargon of the
>>12 step cult (e.g. "people pleaser", "powerless") and promotes participation
>>in the 12 step cult for everyone in order to take on the 12 step beliefs and
>>way of thinking about things. his whole diatribe is littered with the jargon
>>of 12 steppism.
>it wouldn't matter if the Ku Klux Klan wrote it.. it makes a lot of valid
>points
the source does matter. that's her whole point btw. she claims that Satan
himself wrote the works of St. Paul.
the author (possibly called Betty Lee) is a person enmeshed in the 12 step
cult. a group which lures people in by claiming to have a solution to drug &
alcohol addiction. i once took it very seriously because i bought their lie
that they were essential to my getting rid of my drug problem.
their whole cult is founded upon the theory that drug addiction stems from
an underlying disease which has no cure.
quotes are taken from the basic text (a book simply titled "Narcotics
Anonymous", ISBN: 0-912075-02-3)
P. 3: "We are people in the grip of a continuing and progressive illness
whose ends are always the same: jails, institutions or death."
P. 14: "Many of us ended up in jail, or sought help through medicine,
religion and psychiatry. None of these methods was sufficient for us. Our
disease always resurfaced or continued to progress until in desperation, we
sought help from each other in Narcotics Anonymous. After coming to NA we
realised that we were sick people. We suffered from a disease from which
there is no known cure."
at the start of every meeting, it is compulsory that various sheets be read
out. those sheets contain the above quotes. those sheets are read out to
indoctrinate newcomers into the NA way of thinking about things.
the last quote basically places the idea firmly in the minds of newcomers
that this NA way is _the_ way and no other method is of any use, so don't
even bother going there to check it. we've already done all the
investigation for you and NA is the only way. stick with our program.
that is cult.
and furthermore it is a cult which does not even achieve what it claims to
achieve. less than 5% of folks attending a 12 step program of any
description will get what they went there for.
but this cult has managed to get an official stamp of approval from the US
government. the war on drugs has provided a convenient backdoor for 12 step
cult members to infiltrate their ideas into the governments of this world.
the whole disease concept of addiction is without merit. if you want to
understand addiction _rationally_ then go here:
http://www.rational.org/Crash.html
the desire to use drugs is not caused by an underlying disease that needs
treatment. the desire is merely part of our healthy appetites which has
attached itself to a source of pleasure.
>>[ an aside: the founder of AA (Bill Wilson) claimed a "Damascus road"
>>experience:
>>http://www.revelations-unsealed.com/acts/acts2.htm
>>:By contrast, Bill Wilson, the founder of Alcoholics Anonymous, and Melody
>>:Beattie, the author of the book Codependent No More,--both of whom had
>>:their Spiritual Awakenings in the form of the Lord's appearance in light
>>[...]
>>:Worthy of mentioning again is that Jesus did not make His appearance to Paul
>>:that day the same way that He appeared to Bill Wilson, Melody Beattie, and
>>:all the other people whose Spiritual Awakenings are legitimate and occur by
>>:means of seeing the Lord in a vision of light.
>>does anyone believe that these folks had a genuine Damascus road experience?
>>I mean, come on. That is pure bullshit. And yet the whole worldwide 12 step
>>movement is based on a man who claimed that. <laughter track>
>Paul's Damascus road experience, as recorded in Acts, is part of the proof that
>Paul could have been the true Antichrist.
or you can take it at face value.
>I went by the passages they pointed
>out, not their 'filler' crap. I didn't read about someone in the 12-Step
>program that claimed he had a similar experience, but if true, I would probably
>ignore that particular claim.
the quotes above come from that site. but before i read it there, i was
aware that the AA "Big Book" contains that claim by Bill Wilson.
The founder of AA and indeed of all 12 step programs claimed to have had a
Damascus road experience of God Almighty who gave him the program.
Does that sound a little bit like Joseph Smith?
those are the cold hard facts about AA/NA. the guy who started them claimed
to have had a special Spiritual Awakening when God Almighty visited him in a
vision of light.
and the US government endorses such a program for the treatment of people
arrested in possesion of drugs (if they claim to have a drug using problem).
i mean, come on, that is soooo not what your constitution is about. the US
constitution specifically was designed to not throw people into harmful
religious cults. but that is precisely what is happening and not just in the
United States of America. It is happening all over the world. Don't you find
that a little bit disturbing?
the US government should have ZERO to do with any 12 step program.
>>clearly both these folks were lying bastards. they started a new world
>>religion (based on the 12 step program which forms the spiritual foundation
>>of all the anonymous 12 step groups) and claimed some divine event. this is
>>common amongst cults. and gullible folks slurp that shit up.
>no.. gullible folks pay attention to the source,
nonsense. it is always important to see who is saying something. because
everyone has an agenda. so what is this person's agenda in writing that
nonsense? it is plain to see from the way she expresses herself: she has a
huge problem with Christians.
>don't ask questions and don't do their own research to verify claims.
I know a bunch about the 12 step cult. and I know that they are lying scum.
>>the greatest travesty is that the US government has inveigled itself with
>>this dangerous cult which is spreading worldwide. 12 step cult members are
>>in positions of authority and they started the practice (in the US) of
>>court-ordering addicts into the 12 step program. which contravenes the US
>>separation of state from religion because courts are ordering people to
>>accept a dangerous religious cult as cure for their addiction. and this is
>>all justified because drugs are such a "clear and present danger" to
>>American society. drugs are a problem, but the "cure" is worse.
>..sounds to me like they're ignoring the separation of state from religion,
>providing a possible 'cure' for one of the deadliest diseases of mankind,
see right there... you have been exposed to the insidious misinformation by
the 12 step cult.
there is no disease of addiction. it is a myth.
and then I've read opinions of some 12 steppers that it's not that important
if it's a disease or not. they wanna gloss the issues. but the issue is
stark - the whole 12 step cult is founded on the idea that drug addiction is
caused by an underlying incurable disease. denying that the disease exists
is known by the smear term "being in denial". if you are "in denial" then
you are really playing with fire. you are a danger to yourself and to
society. you must be placed in jail until you can see the error of your ways
and admit that you do have a disease, because only then is "recovery
possible".
all cult hooey. but it is not a joke. it is deadly serious business because
the government justice systems of the world have largely been persuaded to
believe this cult hooey.
>and doing so in the face of adversity and being labled as a 'cult'..
they are a cult. and cults are always harmful while masquerading as being
useful.
they do not solve the problem they claim to solve. they only make it worse.
their message is the diametric opposite of what is helpful to a person with
a drug problem.
>Cult or not, they pointed out many things that are wrong with Christianity.
now you are going off on some weird tangent that has no basis in reality.
the cult itself has nothing to say about other religions. what i am saying
is that a 12 step cult member has expounded their own personal theory that
St. Paul was Satan-in-the-flesh. can you imagine anything more insane than
that? without audio-visual aids, I find that task Herculean.
>I don't agree
>with the attitude they take towards Christians, as if it's somehow their fault
>they were deceived, but the truth of what they're saying, at least as far as
>what can be verified in the Bible, is real.
no sale here.
i've read her arguments and found that she contradicts herself.
>>why do i state that the 12 step cult is dangerous? because it's central
>>message (which is stated in the first step) assures the person (with a drug
>>problem or whatever other problem) that they are powerless to do anything
>>about it (themselves) and need God's help and, more importantly, the group's
>>help to overcome it. thus they attempt to ensnare people. and this into a
>>group which is effective in helping less than 5% of people with drug
>>problems. 5% is actually less than the spontaneous remission rate (people
>>quitting drugs on their own bat). what that means quite simply is that NA
>>hinders rather than helps people with drug problems. ]
>no.. it means that 95% of the people probably start relying only on
>_themselves_ instead of continuing to rely on God to help them. For those 95%,
>God isn't real and therefore can be of no help.
are you listening to me or are you too busy gabbling your bullshit?
more than 5% of folks with a drug problem who seek no outside help, recover
spontaneously.
therefore if NA sports a recovery rate less than that, it means that they
are not even a placebo - they are poison. which is what one could expect
from a cult.
God is not needed in order to recover from any addiction.
>>many of his points appear very weak, if not spurious even.
>I was amazed at the detail of the revelations..
example?
>>he also heavily criticises Christians and calls them silly names (e.g.
>>"Christendumb"). He also refers to Christians as "xians" which is derogatory
>>and derisive. this strikes me as being directly at odds with his stated
>>stance of being in favour of the teachings of Christ.
>this I agree with.. there's no need for it
that is your strongest clue that her whole theory does not emanate from
goodwill and a genuine desire to help. it comes from a desire to destroy
Christianity by means of a nefarious theory.
basically this person admits having an alcohol problem. maybe the years of
abuse have seriously fucked with this person's ability to think rationally?
back in 1996 I had my own personal experience with such a person. he also
had weird religious theories which made little sense.
>I may, however, somewhat understand his position. The claims they make about
>the Bible, particularly about one of Christianity's favorite people in the Bible
>(Paul), seems at first to be so far-fetched and laugh-out-loud stupid that most
>people won't give it a second thought. Paul is the "crutch" of Christianity,
>the one who makes it seem 'simple' and self-serving. He claims that by a few
>magical words, one can be saved from the fires of hell. The truth is, the
>letters of Paul (Romans, Galatians, Ephesians, etc..) 'add to' AND 'take away
>from' the Gospel (Matthew, Luke, Mark, and John), the Acts of the Apostles,
>Peter, John, Jude, Hebrews and Revelations. Ask most Christians and they will
>confirm that Paul is their favorite 'apostle'. Why? Because he makes
>Christianity, _his_ FALSE Christianity, seem so simple and straightforward.
>Easily the most blatant twisting of words that I have seen from Paul (only after
>it was pointed out by the evil 12-steppers) is the comparison of a 'quote' that
>Paul makes from the Old Testament to the ACTUAL quote _from_ the Old Testament..
>..look at the passages yourself, it doesn't matter which version of Bible (KJ,
>NIV, etc..)
>Look at Romans 3:4, at Paul's 'quote' from Psalm 51:4..
>Romans Chapter 3 Verse 4:
>"Certainly not! Indeed, let God be true but every man a liar. As it is
>written:
>** 'That You may be justified in your words,
> And may overcome when You are judged' ** "
>..in the context that Paul meant to communicate (read Romans 3:1-3), he is
>essentially saying that it is OK or in man's nature to be a liar and that our
>unrighteousness demonstrates the righteousness of God. There is some truth,
>especially from man's perspective, in that statement, but regardless of the
>amount of truth in the statement, the quoted passage is being BOTH _misquoted_
>AND _taken out of context_, not to mention that it substitutes the intended
>subject from the Psalm's quote (God) with the opposite subject (man), and twists
>the meaning so blatantly that the more you read and compare the two, the more
>the deceit is revealed.
>Now look at Psalm 51:1-4
>Psalm 51.1 "Have mercy upon me, O God, according to your loving kindness.
>According to the multitude of your tender mercies blot out my transgressions.
>2 Wash me thoroughly from my iniquity. Cleanse me from my sin,
>3 for I acknowledge my transgressions, and my sin is ever before me.
>4 Against you, you only, God, have I sinned, and done evil in your sight --
>** that You may be found just when You speak,
> And blameless when You judge **
>..David (the psalmist) is saying the exact opposite of what Paul promoted. If
>nothing else, look at who they are referring to. Paul's "You" is referring to
>_us_, mankind ('when You are judged'). David's "You" (in Psalms) is referring
>to _God_ ('when You judge'). The twisting of words is SO elaborate that 99.99%
>of the people that read what Paul said automatically assume that it's the same
>thing from Psalms. Even a comparison of the two, side-by-side, unless you are
>looking for the discrepancy, we simply won't see it.
on the surface (and I am no Biblical scholar) it does appear to be the case
that St. Paul misquoted the original psalmist's verse and changed it's
meaning.
I'm not sure however if that is sufficient evidence to draw the conclusion
that St. Paul was actually Satan-in-the-flesh.
>Again, I don't care if this thing was written by the KKK, they pointed out
>verifiable truths that are absolutely amazing and they may have used the harsh
>language against Christians because they want to shock them into curiosity that
>will ultimately reveal a truth they never in a million friggin years would have
>thought could be true..
or they make have totally messed it up.
>>I'll quote one paragraph to make my point clear:
>>URL: http://www.revelations-unsealed.com/acts/acts4.htm
>>quoted paragraph:
>>:When one considers all the great intellectual theologians, past and present,
>>:who have accepted both stories as being true, we catch at least a glimpse
>>:of why God says the Christians are sick, sick, sick (666) in the head
>>where does God say such a thing? this is pure bullshit sucked out of the
>>author's arse. Equating 666 with "sick sick sick" is pure foolishness.
>..doesn't matter _how_ they put it if you're looking for verifiable facts. I
>ignored their writing style and let the Bible speak for itself.
maybe they have found something of interest. the people who wrote "The Bible
code" also thought so and they made some money.
this person is seeking a publisher. But their general illiteracy is not
exactly an attractor.
>>:living in La-La Land oblivious to reality, the way things really are. Their
>>:denial and delusion is severe."
>>the words "denial" and "delusion" are common 12 step parlance and have no
>>basis in reality. it is a way of defaming and shaming folks that is very
>>common in the 12 step cult.
>so, there's madness in their method..
there's a lot of madness.
mel
wrote in message <oa8mdvcao9ki9e0s6...@4ax.com>:
>On Mon, 02 Jun 2003 07:28:19 GMT, Spitfire hurled
><3EDAF328...@my-deja.com> into the abyss of alt.tasteless.jokes, where it
>constantly lurks, whines, and trolls, crapping on society with 47
>bandwidth-killing lines of moronic idiocy...
as if this fool did anything.
Spitfire
Meanwhile,....on the other side of town Dubya LIED and dragged the country
into an illegal war to steal Iraq's oil and offered Hal Burton (Dick Cheney's
old company) no bid contracts, first to "fight fires" then to "manage Iraqi
revenue" as thousands of innocent Iraqis DIED including women and children
along with hundreds of American solders, and they're still dying....
.....and the American sheeple said, "Thank Jesus! It's not a lie about sex!
BAAAAAAAAAH!,.....look! 'Survivor' is on!"
Spitfire
>
> On Mon, 02 Jun 2003 07:28:19 GMT, Spitfire hurled
> constantly lurks, whines, and trolls, crapping on society with 47
.....I got just the paper to wipe it with....
<tearing pages from the bible>
The Return of Mel
<db614e92.0306...@posting.google.com>:
>I think the plot to demonize the Petersons has failed, what do you
>think?
true. so far i have not read any compelling evidence which ties Scott to
Laci's death.
it's all media baloney.
Vanilla Gorilla (Monkey Boy)
wrote in alt.tasteless.jokes:
Not at all. Most of what I write is for my own amusement, and if
someone else happens to get something out of it, that's just a bonus.
Jesus
<vgor...@pobox.alaska.net> wrote in message
<nd3odv0oqa8vl1euu...@4ax.com>:
you know, we're very alike.
Once you heard, "Believe on the Lord Jesus and you will be saved."
I tell you now truly that only those who were pre-ordained were sealed for salvation. To see whether you qualify please refer to:
http://www.savedbyjesus.universe?surname=<your surname>?firstname=<your firstname>?dob=<your date of birth>
Tommy
"mel"
> >>Just be forewarned, it's quite terrible. Since buying a new copy only
> >>supports and encourages more such idiocy, I
> >>buried neck-deep in kookdom for at least a year. I don't have the
> >>stomach for that much, but "it's all there."
Snipped a load of something or other -
Anyway I thought you might be interested in the English language -it's a
peculiar languge, full of contradictions - much like conspiracy theorists
everywhere -
Cheers
Tommy
Richard Lederer
"English is a Crazy Language"
From: "Crazy English"
By Richard Lederer
English has acquired the largest vocabulary of all the world's
languages, perhaps as many as two million words, and has generated one
of the noblest bodies of literature in the annals of the human race.
Nonetheless, it is now time to face the fact that English is a crazy
language -- the most loopy and wiggy of all tongues.
In what other language do people drive in a parkway and park in a
driveway?
In what other language do people play at a recital and recite at a play?
Why does night fall but never break and day break but never fall?
Why is it that when we transport something by car, it's called a
shipment, but when we transport something by ship, it's called cargo?
Why does a man get a hernia and a woman a hysterectomy?
Why do we pack suits in a garment bag and garments in a suitcase?
Why do privates eat in the general mess and generals eat in the
private mess?
Why do we call it newsprint when it contains no printing but when we
put print on it, we call it a newspaper?
Why are people who ride motorcycles called bikers and people who
ride bikes called cyclists?
Why -- in our crazy language -- can your nose run and your feet smell?
Language is like the air we breathe. It's invisible, inescapable,
indispensable, and we take it for granted. But, when we take the time to
step back and listen to the sounds that escape from the holes in
people's faces and to explore the paradoxes and vagaries of English, we
find that hot dogs can be cold, darkrooms can be lit, homework can be
done in school, nightmares can take place in broad daylight while
morning sickness and daydreaming can take place at night, tomboys are
girls and midwives can be men, hours -- especially happy hours and rush
hours -- often last longer than sixty minutes, quicksand works very
slowly, boxing rings are square, silverware and glasses can be made of
plastic and tablecloths of paper, most telephones are dialed by being
punched (or pushed?), and most bathrooms don't have any baths in them.
In fact, a dog can go to the bathroom under a tree -- no bath, no room;
it's still going to the bathroom. And doesn't it seem, a little bizarre
that we go to the bathroom in order to go to the bathroom?
Why is it that a woman can man a station but a man can't woman one,
that a man can father a movement but a woman can't mother one, and that
a king rules a kingdom but a queen doesn't rule a queendom? How did all
those Renaissance men reproduce when there don't seem to have been any
Renaissance women?
Sometimes you have to believe that all English speakers should be
committed to an asylum for the verbally insane:
In what other language do they call the third hand on the clock the
second hand?
Why do they call them apartments when they're all together?
Why do we call them buildings, when they're already built?
Why it is called a TV set when you get only one?
Why is phonetic not spelled phonetically?
Why is it so hard to remember how to spell mnemonic?
Why doesn't onomatopoeia sound like what it is?
Why is the word abbreviation so long?
Why is diminutive so undiminutive?
Why does the word monosyllabic consist of five syllables?
Why is there no synonym for synonym or thesaurus?
And why, pray tell, does lisp have an s in it?
English is crazy.
If adults commit adultery, do infants commit infantry? If olive oil
is made from olives, what do they make baby oil from? If a vegetarian
eats vegetables, what does a humanitarian consume? If pro and con are
opposites, is congress the opposite of progress?
Why can you call a woman a mouse but not a rat -- a kitten but not a
cat? Why is it that a woman can be a vision, but not a sight -- unless
your eyes hurt? Then she can be "a sight for sore eyes."
A writer is someone who writes, and a stinger is something that
stings. But fingers don't fing, grocers don't groce, hammers don't ham,
humdingers don't humding, ushers don't ush, and haberdashers do not
haberdash.
If the plural of tooth is teeth, shouldn't the plural of booth be
beeth? One goose, two geese -- so one moose, two meese? One index, two
indices -- one Kleenex, two Kleenices? If people ring a bell today and
rang a bell yesterday, why don't we say that they flang a ball? If they
wrote a letter, perhaps they also bote their tongue. If the teacher
taught, why isn't it also true that the preacher praught? Why is it that
the sun shone yesterday while I shined my shoes, that I treaded water
and then trod on the beach, and that I flew out to see a World Series
game in which my favorite player flied out?
If we conceive a conception and receive at a reception, why don't we
grieve a greption and believe a beleption? If a firefighter fights fire,
what does a freedom fighter fight? If a horsehair mat is made from the
hair of horses, from what is a mohair coat made?
A slim chance and a fat chance are the same, as are a caregiver and
a caretaker, a bad licking and a good licking, and "What's going on?"
and "What's coming off?" But a wise man and a wise guy are opposites.
How can sharp speech and blunt speech be the same and quite a lot and
quite a few the same, while overlook and oversee are opposites? How can
the weather be hot as hell one day and cold as hell the next?
If button and unbutton and tie and untie are opposites, why are
loosen and unloosen and ravel and unravel the same? If bad is the
opposite of good, hard the opposite of soft, and up the opposite of
down, why are badly and goodly, hardly and softly, and upright and
downright not opposing pairs? If harmless actions are the opposite of
harmful actions, why are shameful and shameless behavior the same and
pricey objects less expensive than priceless ones? If appropriate and
inappropriate remarks and passable and impassable mountain trails are
opposites, why are flammable and inflammable materials, heritable and
inheritable property, and passive and impassive people the same? How can
valuable objects be less valuable than invaluable ones? If uplift is the
same as lift up, why are upset and set up opposite in meaning? Why are
pertinent and impertinent, canny and uncanny, and famous and infamous
neither opposites nor the same? How can raise and raze and reckless and
wreckless be opposites when each pair contains the same sound?
Why is it that when the sun or the moon or the stars are out, they
are visible, but when the lights are out, they are invisible; that when
I clip a coupon from a newspaper I separate it, but when I clip a coupon
to a newspaper, I fasten it; and that when I wind up my watch, I start
it, but when I wind up this essay, I shall end it?
English is a crazy language.
How can expressions like "I'm mad about my flat," "No football
coaches allowed," "I'll come by in the morning and knock you up," and
"Keep your pecker up" convey such different messages in two countries
that purport to speak the same English?
How can it be easier to assent than to dissent but harder to ascend
than to descend? Why is it that a man with hair on his head has more
hair than a man with hairs on his head; that if you decide to be bad
forever, you choose to be bad for good; and that if you choose to wear
only your left shoe, then your left one is right and your right one is
left? Right?
Small wonder that we English users are constantly standing meaning
on its head. Let's look at a number of familiar English words and
phrases that turn out to mean the opposite or something very different
from what we think they mean:
A waiter. Why do they call those food servers waiters, when it's the
customers who do the waiting?
I could care less. I couldn't care less is the clearer, more
accurate version. Why do so many people delete the negative from this
statement? Because they are afraid that the n't...less combination will
make a double negative, which is a no-no.
I really miss not seeing you. Whenever people say this to me, I feel
like responding, "All right, I'll leave!" Here speakers throw in a
gratuitous negative, not, even though I really miss seeing you is what
they want to say.
The movie kept me literally glued to my seat. The chances of our
buttocks being literally epoxied to a seat are about as small as the
chances of our literally rolling in the aisles while watching a funny
movie or literally drowning in tears while watching a sad one. We
actually mean The movie kept me figuratively glued to my seat -- but who
needs figuratively, anyway?
A non-stop flight. Never get on one of these. You'll never get down.
A near miss. A near miss is, in reality, a collision. A close call
is actually a near hit.
My idea fell between the cracks. If something fell between the
cracks, didn't it land smack on the planks or the concrete? Shouldn't
that be my idea fell into the cracks (or between the boards)?
A hot water heater. Who heats hot water? This is similar to garbage
disposal. Actually, the stuff isn't garbage until after you dispose of it.
A hot cup of coffee. Here again the English language gets us in hot
water. Who cares if the cup is hot? Surely we mean a cup of hot coffee.
Doughnut holes. Aren't those little treats really doughnut balls?
The holes are what's left in the original doughnut. (And if a candy cane
is shaped like a cane, why isn't a doughnut shaped like a nut?)
I want to have my cake and eat it too. Shouldn't this timeworn
cliche be I want to eat my cake and have it too? Isn't the logical
sequence that one hopes to eat the cake and then still possess it?
A one-night stand. So who's standing? Similarly, to sleep with
someone. Who's sleeping?
I'll follow you to the ends of the earth. Let the word go out to the
four corners of the earth that ever since Columbus we have known that
the earth doesn't have any ends.
It's neither here nor there. Then where is it?
Extraordinary. If extra-fine means "even finer than fine" and
extra-large "even larger than large," why doesn't extraordinary mean
"even more ordinary than ordinary"?
The first century B.C. These hundred years occurred much longer ago
than people imagined. What we call the first century B.C. was, in fact
the last century B.C.
Daylight saving time. Not a single second of daylight is saved by
this ploy.
The announcement was made by a nameless official. Just about
everyone has a name, even officials. Surely what is meant is "The
announcement was made by an unnamed official."
Preplan, preboard, preheat, and prerecord. Aren't people who do this
simply planning, boarding, heating, and recording? Who needs the
pretentious prefix? I have even seen shows "prerecorded before a live
audience," certainly preferable to prerecording before a dead audience.
Pull up a chair. We don't really pull a chair up; we pull it along
the ground. We don't pick up the phone; we pick up the receiver. And we
don't really throw up; we throw out.
Put on your shoes and socks. This is an exceedingly difficult
maneuver. Most of us put on our socks first, then our shoes.
A hit-and-run play. If you know your baseball, you know that the
sequence constitutes "a run-and-hit play."
The bus goes back and forth between the terminal and the airport.
Again we find mass confusion about the order of events. You have to go
forth before you can go back.
I got caught in one of the biggest traffic bottlenecks of the year.
The bigger the bottleneck, the more freely the contents of the bottle
flow through it. To be true to the metaphor, we should say, I got caught
in one of the smallest traffic bottlenecks of the year.
Underwater and underground. Things that we claim are underwater and
underground are obviously surrounded by, not under the water and ground.
I lucked out. To luck out sounds as if you're out of luck. Don't you
mean I lucked in?
Because we speakers and writers of English seem to have our heads
screwed on backwards, we constantly misperceive our bodies, often saying
just the opposite of what we mean:
Watch your head. I keep seeing this sign on low doorways, but I
haven't figured out how to follow the instructions. Trying to watch your
head is like trying to bite your teeth.
They're head over heels in love. That's nice, but all of us do
almost everything head over heels. If we are trying to create an image
of people doing cartwheels and somersaults, why don't we say, They're
heels over head in love?
Put your best foot forward. Now let's see.... We have a good foot
and a better foot -- but we don't have a third -- and best -- foot. It's
our better foot we want to put forward. This grammar atrocity is akin to
May the best team win. Usually there are only two teams in the contest.
Similarly, in any list of bestsellers. only the most popular book is
genuinely a bestseller. All the rest are bettersellers.
Keep a stiff upper lip. When we are disappointed or afraid, which
lip do we try to control? The lower lip, of course, is the one we are
trying to keep from quivering.
I'm speaking tongue in cheek. So how can anyone understand you?
Skinny. If fatty means "full of fat," shouldn't skinny mean "full of
skin"?
They do things behind my back. You want they should do things in
front of your back?
They did it ass backwards. What's wrong with that? We do everything
ass backwards.
English is weird.
In the rigid expressions that wear tonal grooves in the record of
our language, beck can appear only with call, cranny with nook, hue with
cry, main with might, fettle only with fine, aback with taken, caboodle
with kit. and spick and span only with each other. Why must all shrifts
be short, all lucre filthy, all bystanders innocent, and all bedfellows
strange? I'm convinced that some shrifts are lengthy and that some lucre
is squeaky clean, and I've certainly met guilty bystanders and perfectly
normal bedfellows.
Why is it that only swoops are fell? Sure, the verbivorous William
Shakespeare invented the expression "one fell swoop," but why can't
strokes, swings, acts, and the like also be fell? Why are we allowed to
vent our spleens but never our kidneys or livers? Why must it be only
our minds that are boggled and never our eyes or our hearts? Why can't
eyes and jars be ajar, as well as doors? Why must aspersions always be
cast and never hurled or lobbed?
Doesn't it seem just a little wifty that we can make amends but
never just one amend; that no matter how carefully we comb through the
annals of history, we can never discover just one annal; that we can
never pull a shenanigan, be in a doldrum, eat an egg Benedict, or get
just one jitter, a willy, a delirium tremen, or a heebie-jeebie. Why,
sifting through the wreckage of a disaster, can we never find just one
smithereen?
Indeed, this whole business of plurals that don't have matching
singulars reminds me to ask this burning question, one that has puzzled
scholars for decades: If you have a bunch of odds and ends and you get
rid of or sell off all but one of them, what do you call that doohickey
with which you're left?
What do you make of the fact that we can talk about certain things
and ideas only when they are absent? Once they appear, our blessed
English doesn't allow us to describe them. Have you ever seen a horseful
carriage or a strapful gown? Have you ever run into someone who was
combobulated, sheveled, gruntled, chalant, plussed, ruly, gainly,
maculate, pecunious, or peccable? Have you ever met a sung hero or
experienced requited love? I know people who are no spring chickens, but
where, pray tell, are the people who are spring chickens? Where are the
people who actually would hurt a fly? All the time I meet people who are
great shakes, who can cut the mustard, who can fight City Hall, who are
my cup of tea, who would lift a finger to help, who would give you the
time of day, and whom I would touch with a ten-foot pole, but I can't
talk about them in English -- and that is a laughing matter.
If the truth be told, all languages are a little crazy. As Walt
Whitman might proclaim, they contradict themselves. That's because
language is invented, not discovered, by boys and girls and men and
women, not computers. As such, language reflects the creative and
fearful asymmetry of the human race, which, of course, isn't really a
race at all.
That's why we wear a pair of pants but, except on very cold days,
not a pair of shirts. That's why men wear a bathing suit and bathing
trunks at the same time. That's why brassiere is singular but panties is
plural. That's why there's a team in Toronto called the Maple Leafs and
another in Minnesota called the Timberwolves.
That's why six, seven, eight, and nine change to sixty, seventy,
eighty, and ninety, but two, three, four, and five do not become twoty,
threety, fourty, and fivety. That's why first-degree murder is more
serious than third-degree murder but a third-degree burn is more serious
than a first-degree burn. That's why we can open up the floor, climb the
walls, raise the roof, pick up the house, and bring down the house.
In his essay "The Awful German Language," Mark Twain spoofs the
confusion engendered by German gender by translating literally from a
conversation in a German Sunday school book: "Gretchen. Wilhelm, where
is the turnip? Wilhelm. She has gone to the kitchen. Gretchen. Where is
the accomplished and beautiful English maiden? Wilhelm. It has gone to
the opera." Twain continues: "A tree is male, its buds are female, its
leaves are neuter; horses are sexless, dogs are male, cats are female --
tomcats included."
Still, you have to marvel at the unique lunacy of the English
language, in which you can turn a light on and you can turn a light off
and you can turn a light out, but you can't turn a light in; in which
the sun comes up and goes down, but prices go up and come down -- a
gloriously wiggy tongue in which your house can simultaneously burn up
and burn down and your car can slow up and slow down, in which you fill
in a form by filling out a form, in which your alarm clock goes off by
going on, in which you are inoculated for measles by being inoculated
against measles, in which you add up a column of figures by adding them
down, and in which you first chop a tree down -- and then you chop it
up. (By Richard Lederer)
ur_droll
SHUT UP
The Return Of GP
--
http://www.geocities.com/mystacy/atjfaq.htm
http://www.mystacy.com/fagboymel/melmorph.html
"mel" <m...@mel.com> wrote in message
news:9oemdvo7v8hajjsn7...@4ax.com...
is that your skanky mommy fag boy?
>
> have you read that shit? and realised how the author contradicts herself
> while picking at threads in the New Testament that supposedly are
> contradictions?
try and learn to read yourself fag boy.
A man from Southern Nantucket
took a shit in a big rusty bucket
He got wedged in that pail,
an embarrassing tale...
It was only a fart that unstuck it.
>
> --
> smash yer modem, reboot, kill yerself
> http://melsqueers.shorturl.com
The Return Of GP
--
http://www.geocities.com/mystacy/atjfaq.htm
http://www.mystacy.com/fagboymel/melmorph.html
"ur_droll" <Ch...@xtra.co.nz> wrote in message
news:bx6Da.8009$JA5.1...@news.xtra.co.nz...
>
> SHUT UP
make me kiwi.
I have a dear friend who is an engineer in NASA's Safety Office at Marshall
Space Flight Centre in Huntsville. Her group is the one that gives the okay
on shuttle flights so far as safety matters are concerned. I invited her
and a few more friends to my apartment for a party. I asked her to make the
daiquiris.
After she had been in the kitchen for quite some time I went in to see what
the problem was. I found her staring at the blender with a puzzled look on
her face. I asked her what was wrong.
She said, and I quote, "This mix says add 3 parts daiquiri mix to 1 part
rum. I can't find the PART measurement on this blender." And we wonder why
the Challenger blew up.
>
>
Jesus
wrote in message <441pdvsuuh570vicf...@4ax.com>:
>>she contradicts herself several times.
fuck you.
>>>I don't agree
>>>with the attitude they take towards Christians, as if it's somehow their fault
>>>they were deceived, but the truth of what they're saying, at least as far as
>>>what can be verified in the Bible, is real.
>>no sale here.
>>i've read her arguments and found that she contradicts herself.
>..and I'd love to hear what you really think when you're not putting on an act
>for yer 'audience'
it's horseshit.
>>>>many of his points appear very weak, if not spurious even.
>>>I was amazed at the detail of the revelations..
>>example?
>read it yourself..
then fuck you again.
you didn't say anything of merit.
that site is bogus.
--
Jesus
wrote in message <231pdvs45pg74gmv7...@4ax.com>:
>>and one of them wrote that revelations-unsealed.com site. except she is
>>Satan-in-the-flesh but also gradually becomes demon possessed.
>>have you read that shit? and realised how the author contradicts herself
>>while picking at threads in the New Testament that supposedly are
>>contradictions?
>http://islamicbookstore.com/b7170.html
bullshit site.
>http://www.themillennialdispensation.org/sot.html
404
>http://www.tkz.net/netmech/paulfault.txt ..<eg>
the contents of this URL:
***
Posted by [MG]Gambit on August 14, 1997 at 07:02:01: DOUBLE WINNER
Hail all and behold! I come to thee speaking of great
wisdom that has been bestowed on me by the great
enlightened one above! This revelation of utmost
undeniable truth came to me as I worshipped the great
porcelain toilet god after expanding my mind with the
help of a few sheepers and a bottle of Goldschlauger.
As I hung there over the bowl, contemplating life,
liberty, and that ever present brown stain on the
bottom of the bowl, a bolt of clarity stuck me so
forcefully that I was forced to burp out loud in
amazement! I realized the truth that had eluded
me throughout all these years: IT'S ALL PAULS FAULT!!
The ramifications of this hit me just as
Knockmore opened the bathroom stall door too fast
and whacked me on the noggin. As I fell with a
splash into the toilet headfirst, I contemplated
all the things that were now changed. No longer
would I fret over a lost match or a bad connect,
cause IT'S ALL PAULS FAULT! Nevermore would
I claim responsibility for my mistakes,
cause IT'S ALL PAULS FAULT! That match I lost
last week against a newbie? PAUL'S FAULT!
As I bobbed amongst my twice warmed dinner in
the toilet, I also realized that these deeds
were not limited to the online world, but extend
to my entire life! All the mistakes I've made,
all the bad luck I've had, all the beer that has
been flat, and those = sales at the computer store I've missed have
all been PAUL'S FAULT! All sense of personal
responsibility for my actions flushed down the
toilet just as Knock hit the lever. As the roar
of the water assailed my increasing headache, I
knew that I would have to spread this news far
and wide, so that everybody could be as enlightened
as I came to be. As I reentered the bar, tripped
over Steels outstretched foot and fell to the
floor knocking my self out cold, my last thought
of consciousness was that I was going to have one
heck of a hangover.....all thanks to PAUL!!
Gabmit
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
Posted by DocHolliday on August 14, 1997 at 11:07:24: WINNER
In Reply to: IT'S ALL PAULS FAULT!! posted by [MG]Gambit on August 14, 1997
at
07:02:01:
Hey Gabmit,
You missed a few:
Global Warming, Deforestation, Smog, The Election of Bill Clinton,
the UPS strike, Kenedy's assasination (Paul was the second gunman
on the grassy Knowl =) Taxes, Inflation, Cancer, and Dislexia in
relationships, Overtime, Winter, Summer heat, Rain, snow, hail, tornados,
floods, earthquakes, lightning, and cyclonic winds, ALL PAUL's FAULT.
Not to mention that every time you buy a computer there is something
better the very next month for less cash. Paul is working with the
Japanees on this one, trust me.
Oh yea, that flat tire was Paul's fault as well as you not getting
that last raise.
I even heard Michael Jackson was Paul's Creation and then made your
favorite band break up.
Face it, Paul Your just killing all of us :^
/O (Ouchy I think I broke a nail, that's Paul's Fault too)
DocHolliday
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
Posted by DocHolliday on August 15, 1997 at 04:21:49:
OVER THE TOP QUADRUPLE WINNER
In Reply to: Re: IT'S ALL PAULS FAULT!! posted by DocHolliday on August 14,
1997 at
11:07:24:
More missed items:
First, Paul Just caused the power to surge so that I would have to
retype this entire thing. Paul You really stink.
Ok, Paul Created Puberty, and Pimples. Paul then created Fatcells because
he wanted all children to suffer for his amusement. He created the feelings
if inadequecy, inferiority, and depression that torture all children.
Paul Owns AOL ! ! !
Ladies, It is Pauls fault that men normally reach sexual satisfaction before
you, and it is
also Pauls fault that we like to go to sleep after.
Paul is the guy who drives around hitting poor little defensless black
Labbrador
retriever puppies. He thrives on seeing their little happy faces turn to
utter
terror as they for the first time realize that they are going to die. He
loves
the look in their poor little blue puppy dog eye's as a small tear starts to
form.
He does this to cause pain and suffering in little 5 year olds who have gone
to their
first day at Kindegarten. They come home to play with their puppy only to
get out of the
bus and see pooor little rover splattered, but still bairly alive, wimpering
in missery.
He know's it is a sight that they will never be able to forget.
Wait, I'm getting ahead of myself.
In the Begining There was Darkness, God Said Let there be Light and there
was light,
but PAUL was still lurking in the shodows and all through history has spread
missery.
Bear with me on this.
Paul first official act was to convince Satan that God loved People more
than he loved his
angels. Paul LIED so well that God had to throw 1/3rd of the angels from
heaven. This was
all part of Pauls master Plan to bring into existance human sufferage.
Pauls seccond official act was to convince Satan to lure Poor Eve to the
Apple tree. He
Taught Satan how to lie and decieve people for his own evil means. This is
how PAUL
Created
Sin, and all of the Trials that God and Satan put all of us through on a
daily basis.
The next place Paul was seen was with David. Paul convinced David to send
his most loyal
servant out
into an unwinable battle to be killed so David could marry his wife. That is
how Paul Created
Lust.
The Village that God turned to Salt, that was Pauls Home town. Paul
unfortunately wasn't
home. Paul then
Moved to Sodam and Gamorae. (where else do you think Sodamy could come from,
Only a
mind as twisted and evil
as Pauls) Then moved to Egypt where he was close Personal aid to the Pharoe.
Paul was able
to cause much repression
there, but Moses came and put an end to it, vexing Paul for alittle while,
but in retalliation Paul
infiltrated the
Israelites and insited the Party and Idoletry that happend while Mosses was
on the mountain
getting the commandments.
See, the commandments are actually Gods way of saying NO More Paul.
Paul was Next Seen at the Crucifixtion. Paul Drove the
Nails in Christs hands.
Paul took a break, but turned up in Europe in the Middle ages, the MID_EVIL
ages. Paul
created those dark times, and planted
the seeds for the Black Plague.
Paul then Went to France, where he stopped the revolution that would have
changed French
life by over 600 years of democracy.
Paul then invented the Gioteen.
Paul told the Pope, Hey, Taxes are a good Idea, thus creating taxes.
Paul then created the ROCOCO, putting an end to the Classical Reanesaunce.
He did it again
in the early 1900's to put an end to the
baroque. Why infact Paul created Impressionism, Pastels for interior
decorating and Dada in
the early 40's, and all of that Abstract
Impressionism of the 60s and 70's, but I digress
Paul introduced the Indian nation to small pox, and Paul created milaria.
Paul was the close personal tutor to: Hittler, He helped him write his first
book, Lenin, and then,
since Lenin wasn't Harsh enough,
Paul brought in Stalin.
Paul is responsible for all root canals. Paul also invented modern
dentistry.
Paul was the first Lawyer. Paul was also the first true Politician, and is
responsible for feeding
them all of the lies that they tell you and me.
Paul created the Mustard gas used in the first world war, he then invested
in Dupont making a
fortune on chemical weapons development and
weapons of mass destruction.
Paul then started US involvment in Vietnam.
Paul infact invented the human state of mind that caused war to begin with.
Basically greed
and rivalry. Those are Pauls doings.
Paul is the one who killed the last Condor.
Paul also stole your Prom date.
Paul was the fat mean math teacher you had, and Paul was the bully who
picked on you when
you were 5.
That ring that gets in your toilet bowl, Paul Puts that there. Paul is also
responsible for the
scumm that builds up in your bath tub.
Paul is the one who puts holes in your suit while it hangs in the closed.
Paul is the guy who comes over and breaks all of your stuff the day after
the warrenty is up.
Paul is responsible for allllll car salesmen.
For kicks Paul started Bosnia.
Paul is Sadam Husains father.
Paul was driving the Tanker that Exon had crash in Alaska.
Paul is the guy who dumps all of the toxins in the river's and makes needles
wash up on the beach.
Paul invented the O ring that caused the space shuttle to crash.
Paul invented Baldness, and gray hair. Paul invented tooth decay also. read
above under
denistry. Paul also invented Bad Breath.
Paul was at 3 mile island.
Paul caused the Chicago fire.
Paul was the little voice inside of Mandelos, Manson, and Jeffery Dommer's
head. Paul is the
voice inside of all twisted and evil minds because he was the first twisted
and evil mind.
Paul caused the police to beat the guy that cased the LA Riots.
It's on Video. Paul was the guy who was using the knight stick.
Paul was responsible for the Edsel, and the Yugo.
Paul also causes rust, Look you car over good folks you'll see Paul at work
first hand.
Paul puts nails in your driveway.
Paul is the gremlin that causes all airline fatalities.
Paul caused the titanic to sink. That wasn't an Iceberg. It was an Ice boat
Pioleted by
Paul.
Paul is in the minds of all supervisors and Bosses. Paul is the own who
makes them so callus
to human needs.
You see, Look deeeeeeep into Pauls eyes. Inside there you will see the true
meaning of all
mans most vial, dispicable, and tainted thoughts. Look at Pauls head. You'll
see that it is
really 7 heads, and each has the number of the beast stamped on it. If you
would cut one off
it would grow back, because Paul is the AntiChrist. Paul is Satan incarnated
into human form.
Umm, I think that about sums it up. There is more, but here is a tip. It it
is evil, painful,
sad, or bad, then it is Pauls Fault. But it isn't really a fault, it is just
Pauls way of bringing
pain into your lives
/O
DocHolliday
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
Posted by DocHolliday on August 15, 1997 at 04:30:14: WINNER
In Reply to: Re: IT'S ALL PAULS FAULT!! posted by DocHolliday on August 15,
1997 at
04:21:49:
I forgot to mention, becaused Paul made me forget,
Paul Caused the first 2 world wars, Plain and simple. Paul is feverishly
working
on getting the third world war going.
LOL Paul so far you've failed to get that Thermal Nuclear War going.
A warning to all who read. Paul's next really big act of aggression will
happen in 9 years.
Paul will bring about Peace in the Middle east. That will be the beginning
of the Rapture, but it
will
finally spell the end of PAUL. The second coming is around the corner. Your
day's are
numbered PAUL ! ! !
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
Posted by (GZ)KingToady on August 14, 1997 at 21:26:19: DOUBLE WINNER
In Reply to: Re: IT'S ALL PAULS FAULT!! :The NEW CONTEST posted by Paul on
August 14, 1997 at 15:32:59:
Forgive me if I'm repeating anyone else's, but I have a few bones to pick
with Paul as well.
First off, why does he have to steal every other sock out of my laundry
until I have no matching
pairs? When I was 12 Paul invented a biological weapon to kill my goldfish,
and with an
elaborate scheme of falsified evidence he fiendishly made it appear as if it
died because I did
not feed it!
And don't forget decomposition... Paul is in fact responsible for
decomposition, a lot of people
blame that on bacteria but its not true. In fact, Paul is responsible for
bacteria in general.
Paul lures deer out into the middle of busy roads late at night, when he is
not busy with crop
circles and cattle mutilations. Paul bugged my phone and listens to my
private conversations.
Paul gave Jim Jones the recipe for Kool-Aid. Paul invades our dreams and
gives us horrible
nightmares.
Paul brought about the fall of the Roman Empire. Paul is responsible for
flatulence. Paul killed
Bambi's mom. Paul swayed Anniken Skywalker to the Dark Side. Paul stepped on
my foot.
Paul "made my brain transparent".
Paul needs help. No, I need help. We all need some serious help here. Yes,
help. Right. Help
me!
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
Posted by (SRM)LtC Lucifer on August 14, 1997 at 20:12:42: WINNER
In Reply to: Re: IT'S ALL PAULS FAULT!! :The NEW CONTEST posted by Paul on
August 14, 1997 at 15:32:59:
Thank the Lord it is Paul's fault.
I have recently bought a new m/b and pentium II processor.
Well this has created some unexpected difficulties. You see
the only m/b's a pII uses are the ATX form factor. Well of course
this requires a new case(AT and ATX cases are in no way, shape or
form compatible ;). So I went down to my local computer store to
purchase a brand spanking new ATX case. And much too my surprise
they don't carry them. Hmmm, I thought to myself, i will just goto
the competition. Hehe that will show them. So, I went back home and
looked in the Yellow Pages for a place to call. Well fifteen places
later, I finally found someone who could order me an ATX case that
fit my m/b. Well, I am sure by now that anyone who is reading this
far is saying to his/herself, well how is that Paul's fault? All
it has been is a little inconvenience. AH HA I say to the doubters, here
is where it is Paul's fault. I placed all the components in the new case:
peripheral cards,memory, new processor, etc... and flipped on the power
switch
and...NOTHING. So here I sit with a new m/b and a new processor
that are doing absolutely nothing because I have a power supply
that does not work. This I say, must be Paul's fault. I will attempt
to get this problem rectified on the morrow, but ...Sigh...will
Paul strike again?
(SRM)LtC Lucifer
"pirates get all the chicks"(and if for some reason we don't...then
it is Paul's fault as well)
PS Did I mention that I had to disassemble my old computer then
assemble by new, then disassemble my new, then reassemble my old
to get on the net to be able to post this message? Once again...
Pauls fault.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
Posted by [MG]Gambit on August 14, 1997 at 16:15:01: WINNER
In Reply to: Re: IT'S ALL PAULS FAULT!! :The NEW CONTEST posted by Paul on
August 14, 1997 at 15:32:59:
: You guys suck!! Now I'm really mad!! How dare you guys say
: this!! You didn't even mention that I am responsible for
: dandruff! How could you have possibly forgotten that. You
: old forget to mention I cause moldy bread and overexposed film.
: Yep, last time you took that vacation and the pictures didn't
: come out, that was me. Ooops!! sorry about that.
: OK I'll award 20 points to the group that can come up with
: the most creative thing to blame on Paul. The most foul
: wretched chat post gets 20 points given to the group of their
: choice. I'll even let those on the banned list play, just to
: show I'm a good sport (sometimes!). So cut me down, knock me
: down or knock me up (if you could). :)
(Takes a deep breath) Global warming! Al Gore! Hairy armpits! Impotence!
Belly button lint!
Dry rot, wet rot and flesh-eating bacteria, e-coli, and don't forget sour
milk!
And finally, i blame you for not giving my group 20 points 'cause I had the
original post! =P
(Trying to squeeze some extra points any way I can)
Gambit
Clan Mongoose
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
Posted by Khan Jackal *KERENSKY* on August 14, 1997 at 17:36:54:
TRIPLE WINNER
In Reply to: Re: IT'S ALL PAULS FAULT!! :The NEW CONTEST posted by Paul on
August 14, 1997 at 16:33:15:
Ohmanomanomanomanoman....I am ROFLMAOWTIME. This is TOO much!!!
Sheesh, I guess I have to get in on this too...here goes...
divorce(he cheats with ALL of our wives AND/or boyfreinds), pain in my back
(cuz he
MAKES me sit in front of this darn comp all night),
the holocaust (he WAS Hitler, ask anybody), the cuban missile crisis and the
bay of pigs(used
to be J. Edgar H's right hand man),
pets mysteriously vanishing (he cheats with them too), AIDS (cuz of all his
cheating), the
impending invasion by alien forces (he
is in league with them ALL I swear, I have the e-mail to prove it), car
trouble(he builds design
flaws into the car companies factory automation systems), bike trouble (yeah
THEIR factories
too), bad attitudes (cuz he is SUCH a lovable guy),
the baseball, football, and hockey strikes, (he secretly PAID THEM ALL OFF),
The valujet airlines and TWA crashes (he secretly placed the oxygen
cannisters aboard), Bill
Gates' rise to superstardom (cuz Paul wouldn't take the job), computer
viruses (he invented
them ALL),
the homeless situation in america (he automates EVERYTHING and makes jobs
unnecessary), INFOMERCIALS (yep HIS idea), the assasination of Martin Luther
King (he
just LOVES the southland), trash mags like
the National Enquirer (he started them all), REAGANOMICS (he was Bush's best
freind),
Iran-Contra (then he buddied up to Ollie North, thus corrupting another fine
upstanding
citizen), STUPIDITY (cuz of all his inbreeding),
the invention of CRACK (he accidentally mixxed his stash of cocaine up with
ether-BINGO),
ICE (he ran out of CRACK), The Oklahoma City Bombing (it was HIM), ISHTAR
(check the
credits), the cancellation of Scooby-Doo (YEP, HE invented the Power
Rangers),
long lines at the grocery store (he rigs their computers so the cashiers
take TWICE as long),
the toyz U never got for x-mas (he knocked off SANTA), WORLDWIDE HUNGER (he
eats
ALL the food in the fridge), the rise in teenage pregnancy (see above under
PROMISCUOUS),
crappy weather (see above under ALIENS), AL GORE DANCING IN PUBLIC (who do
ya
think his instructor was? YEP Paul again), and finally TIPPER GORE AND THE
PRMC (he's
sleeping with HER too).
WHEEEEEWWWWWW!!!!
Can I have my 20 points now?!?!?!
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
Posted by Gamma on August 20, 1997 at 20:58:40: DOUBLE WINNER
In Reply to: Re: IT'S ALL PAULS FAULT!! :The NEW CONTEST posted by Khan
Jackal
*KERENSKY* on August 14, 1997 at 17:36:54:
ilKhan Jackal *KERENSKY*
^^^
Paul's faul no doubt...... *GAG*.... :)
-Gamma, The unafiliated all-around map-guy
^^^^^ This too, now you all have to pay for his crimes.
And it's also his fault that all these other posts are too long for me to
read,
so these have all already been covered by someone else.
One last thing, it's Pauls fault that my ISP is charging me an
extra $20 a month for being it's most visited site.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
Posted by [cbs]droopy on August 14, 1997 at 23:07:40: DOUBLE WINNER
In Reply to: Re: IT'S ALL PAULS FAULT!! :The NEW CONTEST posted by Khan
Jackal
*KERENSKY* on August 14, 1997 at 17:36:54:
ok well here goes:
you (paul) are responsible for that build it yourself particle-board
furniture that
never has two of the same part, and you also put japanese, french swedish,
chinese, russian, and farsi directions in the damn box but forget the ones
in english!
you are also responsible for making companies decide to have some assembly
required
and batteries not included in all their products.
you (paul) are the reason no one in the baby boomer generation knows how to
program
a VCR clock (hes like big brother i tell ya).
you (paul) made the beta max vcr tape obsolete (bastard i have 40 videos
that i cant
watch now!!!)
you are responsible for all the carts at the grocery store that have the
uneven wheels
and the ones that only want to go the opposite way you turn them.
you are the reason that i dont have a private jet, 3 mansions, 20 cars, a
harem, and
1 billion bucks.
you killed the dinosaurs (told you not to throw rocks in the solar system
and look what
happened)
you made the bee gees the most popular band of the 70's and forced everyone
to wear bell
bottoms
and hang out in disco bars. i am still hating you for that.
you are responsible for the rapid spread of scabies, syphillis, gonoreha,
and hepatitis
(all known strains).
you made sonny and cher stars.
you are responsible for slavery.
you are the reason that no one can make a movie without creating 10 sequels
that are 50
time worse than the original.
you make people illiterate.
the 8 track was your idea.
and last but not least YOU KILLED ELVIS YOU DIRTY
)@(#@$!*$!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
thank you,
[CBS]Droopy
Clan Black Sheep
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
Posted by [DCM]ChaosCreat on August 14, 1997 at 21:05:05:
In Reply to: Re: IT'S ALL PAULS FAULT!! :The NEW CONTEST posted by Khan
Jackal
*KERENSKY* on August 14, 1997 at 17:36:54:
And THAT is why it is all of his fault for the great clan merger
controversy...he was so busy
doing all of this other stuff he didn't check his mail!
ROFLMAO
R
[DCM]ChaosCreat
(and the car company thing explains my transmission leak, thanks for
clearing that up!)
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
Posted by [DCM]ChaosCreat on August 14, 1997 at 10:53:36: WINNER
In Reply to: Re: IT'S ALL PAULS FAULT!!: Yep it is!! posted by Paul on
August 14, 1997 at
08:58:39:
Hmmm. I can't see blaming Paul for my hangovers, but I WILL blame him for
all of the
looooong rounds on all of those friggin high grav planets. And maybe for the
Transmission leak
on my truck too, just to be safe. (ROFL)
R
[DCM]ChaosCreat
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
Posted by Paul on August 15, 1997 at 08:24:24:
OK after reading these, I think it is only fair
to raise the stakes to 2,000,000 points, but since
I am unfair, I'm not doing that. ;) I will however
raise the stakes to 2000 points and award multiple
prizes. I think I already see 3 or 4 winners posted.
Paul
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
Posted by (SY)Chilliman on August 17, 1997 at 23:28:06: WINNER
In Reply to: The Stakes are Raised AND IT'S ALL PAUL'S FAULT posted by Paul
on
August 15, 1997 at 08:24:24:
It's all your fault that i don't have a grl ...
and i have to move to good forsaken australia
and i have to move back home
and my mom makes me clean my room
and i have to repeat the first 2 years of university again
because of administration bungility
It's all your fault paul it's all your fault
booohooohooo ..... boohooohooo ..... i want my mommy ... boohoo
hooo .... i WANT my mommy .... waaaaaa!!!!! waaa!!!!!
it's all your fault that the world is round
and i have to eat my vegies
and my butt is itchie from poison ivy
and my IQ is low
and my love life sux cecause i have to leave my beloved country
to come to this land of loserville
boohooohoo .... boohooohoo ...i want my mommy ...boohoohoo
... I WANT my mommyyy ...... WAAAAA!!!!!! ....
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
Posted by Khan Titan Kerensky on August 15, 1997 at 17:33:40: WINNER
In Reply to: The Stakes are Raised AND IT'S ALL PAUL'S FAULT posted by Paul
on
August 15, 1997 at 08:24:24:
All the other things already posted are true; it is Paul's fault I did not
get to post them first. It is
Paul's fault there are fire ants in the back yard. It is Paul's fault that
there are Macintoshes. It is
Paul's fault that we have Bill Clinton as President. Abortions are his
fault. It is his fault that
Larry Niven has not yet written the sequel to Protector (which was written
15-20 yrs ago). It
is HIS fault that FANTASY books get put in the same section as SCIENCE
FICTION. It is his
fault that I get bad connections and often cannot get on Kali. It is HIS
fault that my computer
does not have much memory left. It is HIS fault that I forgot everything
else I was going to
post.
Khan Titan Kernsky fo Caln Snow Pahtner
/|\HIS FAULT THAT HAPPENED
|
|
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
Posted by Khan Titan Kerensky on August 15, 1997 at 17:42:15: WINNER
In Reply to: iT'S ALL PAUL'S FAULT posted by Khan Titan Kerensky on August
15, 1997 at
17:33:40:
: All the other things already posted are true; it is Paul's fault I did not get to post them first. It is
Paul's fault there are fire ants in the back yard. It is Paul's fault that
there are Macintoshes. It is
Paul's fault that we have Bill Clinton as President. Abortions are his
fault. It is his fault that
Larry Niven has not yet written the sequel to Protector (which was written
15-20 yrs ago). It
is HIS fault that FANTASY books get put in the same section as SCIENCE
FICTION. It is his
fault that I get bad connections and often cannot get on Kali. It is HIS
fault that my computer
does not have much memory left. It is HIS fault that I forgot everything
else I was going to
post.
: Khan Titan Kernsky fo Caln Snow Pahtner
: /|\HIS FAULT THAT HAPPENED
: |
: |
It is Paul's fault I forgot to post these. It is HIS fault that the I it
iT's ALL PAUL'S FAULT is
not capitalized. It is his fault that the image on previous message will not
load and the link will
not work. Darth Vader's death is his fault; so is the delay of the next Star
Wars movie. It is his
fault that someone on this board misspelled Anakin Skywalker's name.
It is HIS fault I have write this post.
KHAN TITAN KERensky
What do you know, it is his fault I held down the shift key!
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
Posted by NC-Mr.Pibbleton on August 15, 1997 at 11:30:43:
OVER THE TOP QUINTUPLE WINNER
In Reply to: The Stakes are Raised AND IT'S ALL PAUL'S FAULT posted by Paul
on
August 15, 1997 at 08:24:24:
Paul, you bastard, its your fault I have a hairy back !
its your fault I can't pay my electrolysis bills,
its your fault that I've been confused with bigfoot
8 times this month, its your fault that some wacko from idaho
tried to put a tracking collar on me, its your fault that pee wee
herman was caught masturbating in a porno theater, its your fault
that my dog has genital warts now, its your fault that they have
those mysterious white balls in hot dogs, its your fault that the
swedish woman's(thank god there isn't a men's bikini team) has never
dropped by my house. Its your fault that all my cousin's invisible
friends got brutally murdered by my uncle and his invisible shotgun
its all your fault that gas prices keep on rising, its all your fault
that potholes exist, its your fault that calvin and hobbes is no
longer in print(I'll get you for that, oh yes I will !) its your
fault that my boss at work couldn't find his ass in the dark with
a flashlight and instructions, its your fault that that my dog humps
pillows, it your fault that my dog also humps blankets, stuffed animals,
dishrags, the dust buster, and sleeping bags, its your fault I have
lockjaw and can't yell at you anymore, the drool maybe more annoying,
but its just not as witty, its your the lines in the dmv are so long
its your fault that postal workers are always going ballistic, its
your fault that the mascot for the nova cats has yet to be housebroken
its your fault america lost the war of 1812, by rights we should own
canada too ! its your fault that bell bottoms are no longer popular
its your fault that my grandpa makes me buy depends for him, its
your fault that elvis is dead, that he doesn't haunt graceland,
and that aliens did not clone him ! Its your fault that english
isn't the only language in the world, its your fault british food
sucks, its your fault old people drive slow, its your fault america
doesn't have a national everyone get naked day, its your fault
that kibble and bits doesn't taste as good as the commercials make
you think! its your fault ellen degeneres is a lesbian, its your
fault that roseane barr isn't a lesbian, its your fault I'm not a
crime fighting bishop who knows kung fu and has a sidekick called
"alter boy" its your fault people think you can get diseases from
kissing toilets, and are not worrying about why they are kissing
toilets in the first place ! its your fault that few people know
you are really cerebro, its your fault that saturday night live
sucks now, its your fault that silencer can't get a date, it your
fault that there are way to many male flashers running around its
your fault that there aren't enough female flashers running around
its your fault that the new fake fat causes anal bleeding, its your
fault that tofu tastes like crap, its your fault I'm running out
of ideas, it your fault my victims were able to track me down, its
your fault I had to shoot the hostages, its your fault that stamp
prices are on the rise, its your fault that the walls are laughing
at me, and not with me ! its your fault that 60's style musicals involving
at least
one character called "the acid queen" aren't more common ! its
your fault everytime someone steps on a crack, I have to break
their mother's back, and rob the house, cause I am really behind
schedule on this little project ! its your fault that hitler
looked a lot like charlie chaplin, its your fault they can't all
be gems its your fault that a bunch of nuns beat me up, its your
fault my shotgun jammed during the robbery, its your fault that
silencer is making me hold back the really nasty crap about paul,
its your fault the witnessess disapeared before they can testify,
wait nevermind, I did that one =) its your fault I killed 24 people
due to a defective straight jacket you obviously made ! its your
fault that no one appreciates or understands my interpetive dances
its your fault that the corpses in my basement never have anything
positive to say to me ! its his fault on star trek everything has
to do with tachyone pulse emissions ! Its your fault that ricardio
is the father of angelina's baby on general hospital, and that
angelina is really ricardio's sister's bestfriend's cousin who has
a hair lip ! Its your fault that my illegitmate children keep on
finding me ! its your fault i'm not a international porn star,
lord knows I have the drive and the talent ! its his fault that
my butt only itches when people are around ! Its his fault that
aliens went and stole my memories so I can't blame paul as much
as I should !
Sincerely,
Mr.Pibbleton
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
Posted by DocHolliday on August 15, 1997 at 10:21:13: WINNER
In Reply to: The Stakes are Raised AND IT'S ALL PAUL'S FAULT posted by Paul
on
August 15, 1997 at 08:24:24:
Yea Right,
Paul You are so evil, how can we believe you.
Oh, I'd like to personally thank you for making the Paint flake off of the
hood
of my 28,000 dollar truck this week, and for the masive Shopping Cart
Scratch in the.
side. It's only 2 months old! I'd also like to thank you for making the
Dealership
Put me in a NEON ! ! ! I Climbed out of my F-150 4X4 and stepped down into
this Goat Cart they call a car. I actually have to Look up to see into a
Yugo.
I'll even bet you are responsible for the entire Subcompact Car idea.
Oh, and Thanks for making the Dealership take longer than expected. I won't
get it back till
Monday, so the Rental is coming out of My Pocket for the last 2 days of it.
I can't believe
I actually have to PAY to drive a NEON ! ! !
Paul You again show you are the AntiChrist, and I am Jobe.
ARRRRRRRRRRRRRG. Errrrrr.
Have You no Decency? Even God takes a day off each week.
/O
DocHolliday
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
Posted by [DCM]ChaosCreat on August 15, 1997 at 09:10:02: DOUBLE WINNER
In Reply to: The Stakes are Raised AND IT'S ALL PAUL'S FAULT posted by Paul
on
August 15, 1997 at 08:24:24:
Ok, this is the ultimate wrong. Nothing more evil or despicable can ever be
laid at Paul's
doorstep than this charge....
DANOCO is all Paul's fault!!!!!!!!
heh heh
R
[DCM]ChaosCreat
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
Posted by [MG]Gambit on August 15, 1997 at 09:23:28: WINNER
In Reply to: Re: The Stakes are Raised AND IT'S ALL PAUL'S FAULT posted by
[DCM]ChaosCreat on August 15, 1997 at 09:10:02:
: Ok, this is the ultimate wrong. Nothing more evil or despicable can ever be laid at Paul's
doorstep than this charge....
: DANOCO is all Paul's fault!!!!!!!!
: heh heh
: R
: [DCM]ChaosCreat
No you fool! Paul IS DANOCO! They are ONE AND THE SAME!! Ever wonder why
DANOCO posts almost as much as Paul on this board? Hmm? They are the same
person!
Either that or this drink is way too strong....
Gambit
Clan Mongoose
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
Posted by HadesPrime on August 15, 1997 at 17:00:52: TRIPLE WINNER
In Reply to: Re: PAUL .... DANOCO???? posted by Zor on August 15, 1997 at
14:06:39:
ahhh I will have to add one short Pually to this all (hehe a Paully)
ITS ALL PAULS FAULT THAT IDIOTS LIKE YOU POST TO THIS BOARD .
HadesPrime
: Paul is responsible for CBL being on TKZ so long when they
: never had enough members!!! Oh, wait, were we supposed to
: be making these up to win?
: Zor
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
Posted by [CBS]Droopy on August 15, 1997 at 09:19:57:
In Reply to: Re: The Stakes are Raised AND IT'S ALL PAUL'S FAULT posted by
[DCM]ChaosCreat on August 15, 1997 at 09:10:02:
(Spits beer all over monitor)
roflmao
holy zark we have a winna! give the man a ceeeegar!
dude that one takes the grand prize man congratulations.
heehehe
[CBS]Droopy
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
Posted by EagleOwl on August 16, 1997 at 19:48:05: WINNER
Yep. You read the subject right. It is all Paul's fault. For what you ask?
Well, the full explanation
is a bit long, but the abridged version isn't bad. It does help if you have
an understanding of the
Chaos theory (specifically the butterfly effect) and Special Relativity
though.
One night, when having nothing to do, I got to thinking. What was it exactly
that caused the
Hubble telescope to have a faulty mirror? I decided to log onto the internet
for the answer. As I
got to searching, I found out that one man was the direct cause of it. No,
it wasn't Paul. One
poor Vietnamese worker, who was only getting payed $.12 an hour to work on
the Hubble,
sneezed. After that, the snot, for lack of a better term, hardened, and
caused the mirror to
deform. As I delved deeper, I found that it was pollen that had gotten in
the man's nose, and
caused him to sneeze. Odd, I thought. Pollen, in a clean room? I researched
harder than ever
now. I found that Paul had been working too hard and too late one evening.
He worked so late,
that he, without his knowing, caused space-time to destablize around him,
and he got pushed
out of temporal sync.
What did Paul do while he was out of our temporal sync? Well, he stepped on
a cockroach. The
wind disturbance from this (similar to the butterfly effect) built up,
causing a huge tsunami in
Japan, several years ago (Paul was out of temporal sync). This tsunami
stirred up some pollen.
This pollen was then drawn through a wormhole (caused by Paul working late
on a different
night), to be deposited in the clean room (only semi-clean now), on the
vietnameese worker,
and that is when he sneezed.
So that is how Paul hurt the Hubble telescope.
Now, you may be saying, "So what, they corrected that." Yes, they did. But I
can tie Paul in
with other things throughout our history. Hitler, the Kennedy Assasination,
William Shatner's
lack of hair, the lack of new Babylon 5 shows. And I also did some
calculations, the answers of
which were frightening. If Paul, does not relax IMMEDIATELY, he may cause
Bill Gates, yes,
Bill Gates, to become ruler of the planet. If Bill Gates becomes ruler of
this planet, then we all
know who to blame. Just send many emails to Paul Sundling, saying, "IT IS
ALL YOUR
FAULT PAUL!!!".
Thank you for your time. By reading this letter, you wave some of your US
citizen rights, and
you pledge your alliegence to the Anti-Gates infantry. Void where prohibited
by law. Your
rights may vary from state to state.
Michael Mancini
eagl...@fls.infi.net
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
Posted by EagleOwl on August 18, 1997 at 20:05:47: WINNER
In Reply to: IT IS ALL PAUL'S FAULT! posted by EagleOwl on August 16, 1997
at
19:48:05:
Okay, I think it is Paul's fault for the Big Bang, and therefore, it will be
his fault for the Big
Crunch. He also is the one that caused black holes. And Paul was responsible
for the Ice Age,
which killed all the dinosaurs. Therefore, Paul is responsible for genocide,
the mass murder of
an entirely innocent species.
I tell you, Bill Gates WILL become the ruler of the planet if Paul is not
stopped.
Michael Mancini
eagl...@fls.infi.net
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
Posted by EagleOwl on August 16, 1997 at 20:08:21: WINNER
In Reply to: IT IS ALL PAUL'S FAULT! posted by EagleOwl on August 16, 1997
at
19:48:05:
Whoops! I almost forgot. The broken patriot missles were Paul's fault, as
well as those
directions that were translated to english from japaneese.
And I saved the worst atrocity I can think of for the last, next to Bill
Gates ruling the planet.
You know that itching, burning sensation between your toes? (a.k.a.
athlete's foot) Well, Paul
caused that one too. He actually was able to cause a large enough distortion
to go to the Big
Bang, and spread the bacteria causing athlete's foot. So we need to watch
out, giant aliens
composed of athlete's foot may be right now hurtiling through space towards
us, to conquer us.
I personally would rather have them than Bill Gates.
I tell you, if he is not stopped now, Bill Gates will not only be your ruler
but he will appear on
your underwear too!!!
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
Hey yall,
I just thought I'd let you know Paul now owns stock in Gerber
knives. I've known and used Gerber Knives for all of my knife
needs for years. Actually 4 out of 5 Psycho's perfer Gerber
knives, however:
My EZout TM Gerber knife is a problem. I'd recomend if you
were thinking bout buying one that you not. Seems Paul talked
to the design team at Gerber Knives and convinced them that
the best way to put the rubber gripper strips was to cut a huge
whole in the handle and leave a 1/16th by 1/16th inch square
strip of plastic shrouding the rubber. The plastic ofcourse
stresses and breakes, letting the rubber grip strip fall out and
leaving half of the blade exposed when Closed.
Buy a Spyderco for now. I'm currently talking directly with
Gerber Knives to see if I can undo all that Paul has done.
;) couldn't resist Paul. Actually this is a true story, except
for the Paul involvment, Hmmm, or is the Paul Involvment really
happening. Anyhow, I hate buying something with a design flaw
and wanted to pass on the info. Gerber is a quality product,
but they missed the boat in the design of the EZout, and it is
a crying shame. It is a wonderful knife except for that.
/O
DocHolliday -OH, COOOOL, WAR ON TKZ, ALL OUT WAR-
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
Posted by [DCM]ChaosCreat on August 23, 1997 at 12:23:54:
In Reply to: Knives posted by Holliday on August 22, 1997 at 23:08:33:
I have a little Gerber pocketknife that I have had for over 20 years now,
and it is still in good
shape.
Of course that was pre-......PAUL!
Is there NO END to the man's evil schemes?
hehehe
R
[DCM]ChaosCreat
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
Posted by KOOB121 on August 23, 1997 at 18:30:10:
In Reply to: Re: Knives posted by [DCM]ChaosCreat on August 23, 1997 at
12:23:54:
: I have a little Gerber pocketknife that I have had for over 20 years now, and it is still in good
shape.
: Of course that was pre-......PAUL!
********************
: Is there NO END to the man's evil schemes?
********************
Probably not.....
(NWH)KOOB121
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
Posted by TargetLoc on August 21, 1997 at 16:41:07:
I'm not sure if the contest is over yet, but if it is,
well some things just have to be said .
Paul is responcible for all the "S" words:
Spam: He discovered the secret formula for it while
chewing on his genitals
Bob Sagat: Why do you make the rest of us suffer with
your ongoing funding for Americas Funniest Home
Videos?
StarTrek Voyager: COME ON! Let the show die in peace
ok? Three shows are enough! I mean it reached its
peak in The Next Generation. UPN doesn't need
your suggestions! You've just gone and ruined a
good thing!
From the ever waiting to pay you back for what you have
done.... TargetLoc
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
***
face it. you are an arsehole. a great big steaming turd of an arsehole.
--
Once you heard, "Believe on the Lord Jesus and you will be saved."
I tell you now truly that only those who were pre-ordained were sealed for salvation.
To see whether you qualify please refer to:
http://www.savedbyjesus.universe?surname=<your surname>?firstname=<your firstname>?dob=<your date of birth>
*******************************
Read the Official atj FAQ here:
http://atjfaq.shorturl.com
*******************************
David James Polewka
>SHUT UP
Thanks:
http://meshier.com/fs/a/index.html
=========================
"Endeavor to persevere"
=========================
David James Polewka
>some non 12-step sources..
>
>http://islamicbookstore.com/b7170.html
>http://www.themillennialdispensation.org/sot.html
>http://www.taliyah.org/pdfs/paul.pdf
>http://www.tkz.net/netmech/paulfault.txt ..<eg>
Also:
Pollywolly
"ŃšS-|-MŠ" <mĆŠMĮ×¹@ÅsSremover.com> wrote in message
> On Mon, 02 Jun 2003 07:48:22 -0700, Otto hurled
> <020620030748221946%alcoh...@autonomous.org> into the abyss of
> alt.tasteless.jokes, where it constantly lurks, whines, and trolls,
crapping on
>
> <snip>
>
> >> are you listening to me or are you too busy gabbling your bullshit?
> >
> >Who are you and why should anyone listing to your gabbling bullshit?
>
> who invited yer fuckwit opinion, shitpacker..
No-one gets invited - they all gatecrash
>
> MŠ
>
> <sig pending>
ur_droll
"ŃšS-|-MŠ" <mĆŠMĮ×¹@ÅsSremover.com> wrote in message
: On Mon, 02 Jun 2003 07:48:22 -0700, Otto hurled
: <020620030748221946%alcoh...@autonomous.org> into the abyss of
: alt.tasteless.jokes, where it constantly lurks, whines, and trolls,
crapping on
:
: <snip>
:
: >> are you listening to me or are you too busy gabbling your bullshit?
: >
: >Well, like you say "the source is important" and so is the "agenda."
: >Who are you and why should anyone listing to your gabbling bullshit?
:
: who invited yer fuckwit opinion, shitpacker..
"Shitpackers" always make you 'uptight'... eh?..<beg>
marvin
"ŃšS-|-MŠ" <mĆŠMĮ×¹@ÅsSremover.com> wrote in message
> On Wed, 04 Jun 2003 15:18:19 +0200, Jesus hurled
> <9jrrdvsm2ld1lomru...@4ax.com> into the abyss of
> alt.tasteless.jokes, where it constantly lurks, whines, and trolls,
crapping on
>
> >On Tue, 03 Jun 2003 05:20:34 -0600, "ŃšS-|-MŠ" <mĆŠMĮ×¹@ÅsSremover.com>
> >wrote in message <231pdvs45pg74gmv7...@4ax.com>:
> >>>and one of them wrote that revelations-unsealed.com site. except she is
> >>>Satan-in-the-flesh but also gradually becomes demon possessed.
> >>>have you read that shit? and realised how the author contradicts
herself
> >>>while picking at threads in the New Testament that supposedly are
> >>>contradictions?
> >>some non 12-step sources..
>
> >>http://islamicbookstore.com/b7170.html
> >
> >bullshit site.
>
>
> >>http://www.themillennialdispensation.org/sot.html
> >
> >404
>
> ..forgot ya still use dial-up
>
> BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!> <snip 3,000 line C&P>
>
> >face it. you are an arsehole. a great big steaming turd of an arsehole.
>
>
> MŠ
>
> <sig pending>
well y'r ass is like a fat woman's - turn around - naw!
Spitfire
>
> SHUT UP
Make me.
Spitfire
>
Damn,...I to it TOTALLY for my own amusement....
Jesus
wrote in message <qk3udv4vhtlpquk1o...@4ax.com>:
>>as if this fool did anything.
i drew first blood.
Jesus
wrote in message <dm4udvgofos8drb48...@4ax.com>:
>>face it. you are an arsehole. a great big steaming turd of an arsehole.
yes.
<flush>
ur_droll
"Spitfire" <spitf...@my-deja.com> wrote in message
news:3EDF03F8...@my-deja.com...
: ur_droll wrote:
: >
: > SHUT UP
:
: Make me.
<Swings machete in wide arc chopping the top half of spiffys head off.....
looks in>...... no wonder his voice echoes
Spitfire
Oh sure, you can only with I would be open minded concerning you.
The Return Of GP
--
http://www.geocities.com/mystacy/atjfaq.htm
http://www.mystacy.com/fagboymel/melmorph.html
"ur_droll" <Ch...@xtra.co.nz> wrote in message
news:pLEDa.10930$JA5.2...@news.xtra.co.nz...
> Us "shitpackers" always make you 'uptight'... eh?..<beg>
no one really likes queers kiwi.
Q. What's the difference between Pee-wee Herman and O.J.?
A. It only took 12 jerks to get O.J. off.
>
>
The Return Of GP
--
http://www.geocities.com/mystacy/atjfaq.htm
http://www.mystacy.com/fagboymel/melmorph.html
"marvin" <mar...@pissoff.com> wrote in message
news:3edf32ef$0$26635$afc3...@news.optusnet.com.au...
you trying to get a fatter queer ass than fag boy mel has roo banger?
Q. How do we know God is a man?
A. Because if God were a woman, semen would taste like chocolate.
>
>
ur_droll
: ur_droll wrote:
: >
: > "Spitfire" <spitf...@my-deja.com> wrote in message
: > news:3EDF03F8...@my-deja.com...
: > : ur_droll wrote:
: > : >
: > : > SHUT UP
: > :
: > : Make me.
: >
: > <Swings machete in wide arc chopping the top half of spiffys head
off.....
: > looks in>...... no wonder his voice echoes
:
*with*with*with............*with*with*with*.....................with*with*wi
th*....
--
Q. What has 4 legs and an arse at each end of its otherwise sluglike body?
A. peter copeman
marvin
all the cum is dripping out!
ur_droll
--
Q. What has 4 legs and an arse at each end of its otherwise sluglike body?
A. peter copeman
"Spitfire" <spitf...@my-deja.com> wrote in message
news:3EDF03F8...@my-deja.com...
:
:
The Return Of GP
--
http://www.geocities.com/mystacy/atjfaq.htm
http://www.mystacy.com/fagboymel/melmorph.html
"ur_droll" <Ch...@xtra.co.nz> wrote in message
news:2WMDa.11535$JA5.2...@news.xtra.co.nz...
been watching rambo again kiwi?
A stranger was seated next to Little Johnny on the plane when the
stranger turned to Little Johnny and said, "Let's talk. I've heard that
flights will go quicker if you strike up a conversation with your fellow
passenger."
Little Johnny, who had just opened his book, closed it slowly, and said
to the stranger, "What would you like to discuss?"
"Oh, I don't know," said the stranger. "How about nuclear power?"
"OK," said Little Johnny. "That could be an interesting topic. But let
me ask you a question first.
A horse, a cow, and a deer all eat grass. The same stuff. Yet a deer
excretes little pellets, while a cow turns out a flat patty, and a
horse produces clumps of dried grass. Why do you suppose that is?"
"Jeez," said the stranger. "I have no idea."
"Well, then," said Little Johnny, "How is it that you feel qualified to
discuss nuclear power when you don't know crap?"
>
>
Douglas D. Anderson
F.H.
Whose cruel idea was it for the word "Lisp" to have a "S" in it?
George Carlin
Pollywolly
"Douglas D. Anderson" <d...@rr.rochester.com> wrote in message
news:dF6Ea.18045$y05....@twister.nyroc.rr.com...
>
> "Spitfire" <spitf...@my-deja.com> wrote
> > ur_droll wrote:
> > >
> > > "Spitfire" <spitf...@my-deja.com> wrote in message
> > > news:3EDF03F8...@my-deja.com...
> > > : ur_droll wrote:
> > > : >
> > > : > SHUT UP
> > > :
> > > : Make me.
> > >
> > > <Swings machete in wide arc chopping the top half of spiffys head
off.....
> > > looks in>...... no wonder his voice echoes
> >
> > Oh sure, you can only with I would be open minded concerning you.
I had no idea Spitty had a 'lithp'
The Return Of GP
--
http://www.geocities.com/mystacy/atjfaq.htm
http://www.mystacy.com/fagboymel/melmorph.html
"marvin" <mar...@pissoff.com> wrote in message
news:3ee03c49$0$17054$afc3...@news.optusnet.com.au...
close your mouth roo banger.
There were two men who played golf together frequently. One was
several strokes better than the other. The lesser player was very
proud, and never wanted to take any strokes to even up the game.
One Saturday morning, he shows up with a gorilla at the first tee.
He says to his friend, "I've been trying to beat you for so long
that I'm about ready to give up. But, I heard about this golfing
gorilla, and I was wondering if it would be alright if he plays
for me today. In fact if you're game, I'd like to try to get back
all the money I've lost to you this year. I figure comes to about
a thousand bucks. Are you willing?"
The other guy thought about it for a minute, and then decided to
play the gorilla. "After all, how good could a gorilla be at golf?"
he thought.
Well, the first hole was a straightaway par 4 of 450 yards. The
guy hits a beautiful tee shot, 275 yards down the middle, leaving
himself a 6 iron to the green. The gorilla takes a few powerful
practice swings and then laces the ball 450 yards, right at the
pin, stopping about 6 inches away from the hole.
The guy turns to his friend and says "That's incredible, I would
have never believed it if I hadn't seen it with my own eyes. But,
you know what, I've seen enough. I've got no interest in being
totally humiliated by this gorilla golfing machine. You send this
frigging gorilla back to where he comes from. I need a drink;
better make it a double, and I'll write you a check."
After handing over the check, and well into his second double the
guy asks, "By the way, how's that gorilla's putting?"
The other guy replies, "Same as his driving."
"That good, huh?"
"No, I mean, he hits putts the same way - 450 yards, right down
the middle!"
>
>
Jesus
in message <3EE0FFC3...@earthlink.net>:
>"Douglas D. Anderson" wrote:
>> "Spitfire" <spitf...@my-deja.com> wrote
>> > ur_droll wrote:
>> > > "Spitfire" <spitf...@my-deja.com> wrote in message
>> > > : > SHUT UP
>> > > : Make me.
>> > > <Swings machete in wide arc chopping the top half of spiffys head off.....
>> > > looks in>...... no wonder his voice echoes
>> > Oh sure, you can only with I would be open minded concerning you.
>> "If withes were hortheth, beggerth would be riderth."
>Whose cruel idea was it for the word "Lisp" to have a "S" in it?
and all those brackets... must have been invented by a woman.
ur_droll
news:bbraek$rip$1...@lust.ihug.co.nz...
:
: "Douglas D. Anderson" <d...@rr.rochester.com> wrote in message
: news:dF6Ea.18045$y05....@twister.nyroc.rr.com...
: >
: > "Spitfire" <spitf...@my-deja.com> wrote
: > > ur_droll wrote:
: > > >
: > > > "Spitfire" <spitf...@my-deja.com> wrote in message
: > > > news:3EDF03F8...@my-deja.com...
: > > > : ur_droll wrote:
: > > > : >
: > > > : > SHUT UP
: > > > :
: > > > : Make me.
: > > >
: > > > <Swings machete in wide arc chopping the top half of spiffys head
: off.....
: > > > looks in>...... no wonder his voice echoes
: > >
: > > Oh sure, you can only with I would be open minded concerning you.
:
: I had no idea
ah Huh
marvin
"ŃšS-|-MŠ" <mĆŠMĮ×¹@ÅsSremover.com> wrote in message
> On Thu, 05 Jun 2003 18:39:00 +0200, Jesus hurled
> <iopudvo1eu06ittc6...@4ax.com> into the abyss of
> alt.tasteless.jokes, where it constantly lurks, whines, and trolls,
crapping on
>
> >On Thu, 05 Jun 2003 03:34:49 -0600, "ŃšS-|-MŠ" <mĆŠMĮ×¹@ÅsSremover.com>
> >wrote in message <qk3udv4vhtlpquk1o...@4ax.com>:
>
> >>>as if this fool did anything.
> >>..he got ya to killfile him
> >
> >i drew first blood.
>
>
> MŠ
>
> <sig pending>
<pats nas on the behind>
marvin
"ŃšS-|-MŠ" <mĆŠMĮ×¹@ÅsSremover.com> wrote in message
> On Thu, 5 Jun 2003 22:09:19 +1000, marvin hurled
> <3edf32ef$0$26635$afc3...@news.optusnet.com.au> into the abyss of
> alt.tasteless.jokes, where it constantly lurks, whines, and trolls,
crapping on
>
> fixed it..
marvin
"ŃšS-|-MŠ" <mĆŠMĮ×¹@ÅsSremover.com> wrote in message
> On Thu, 5 Jun 2003 22:14:22 +1200, ur_droll hurled
> <pLEDa.10930$JA5.2...@news.xtra.co.nz> into the abyss of
alt.tasteless.jokes,
> where it constantly lurks, whines, and trolls, crapping on society with 21
> bandwidth-killing lines of moronic idiocy...
>
> >"ŃšS-|-MŠ" <mĆŠMĮ×¹@ÅsSremover.com> wrote in message
> >news:ts3udv4fuqs2p749s...@4ax.com...
> >: On Mon, 02 Jun 2003 07:48:22 -0700, Otto hurled
> >: <020620030748221946%alcoh...@autonomous.org> into the abyss of
> >: alt.tasteless.jokes, where it constantly lurks, whines, and trolls,
> >crapping on
> >: society with 125 bandwidth-killing lines of moronic idiocy...
> >:
> >: <snip>
> >:
> >: >> are you listening to me or are you too busy gabbling your bullshit?
> >: >
> >: >Well, like you say "the source is important" and so is the "agenda."
> >: >Who are you and why should anyone listing to your gabbling bullshit?
> >:
> >: who invited yer fuckwit opinion, shitpacker..
> >
> >"Shitpackers" always make you 'uptight'... eh?..<beg>
>
marvin
"ŃšS-|-MŠ" <mĆŠMĮ×¹@ÅsSremover.com> wrote in message
> On Thu, 05 Jun 2003 18:39:24 +0200, Jesus hurled
> <9pqudv0ls8ap6sgkv...@4ax.com> into the abyss of
> alt.tasteless.jokes, where it constantly lurks, whines, and trolls,
crapping on
>
> >On Thu, 05 Jun 2003 03:52:26 -0600, "ŃšS-|-MŠ" <mĆŠMĮ×¹@ÅsSremover.com>
> >wrote in message <dm4udvgofos8drb48...@4ax.com>:
>
> >>>face it. you are an arsehole. a great big steaming turd of an arsehole.
> >>..ya think I'm cute..
> >
> >yes.
> >
> ><flush>
>
>
> <reaching to wipe ass>
>
> THUD!
>
> <looking>
>
> oh.. thanks marvin
marvin
"ŃšS-|-MŠ" <mĆŠMĮ×¹@ÅsSremover.com> wrote in message
> On Thu, 5 Jun 2003 20:11:24 +1000, Pollywolly hurled
> <bbn511$jkq$1...@lust.ihug.co.nz> into the abyss of alt.tasteless.jokes,
where it
> constantly lurks, whines, and trolls, crapping on society with 26
> bandwidth-killing lines of moronic idiocy...
>
> >"ŃšS-|-MŠ" <mĆŠMĮ×¹@ÅsSremover.com> wrote in message
> >news:ts3udv4fuqs2p749s...@4ax.com...
> >> On Mon, 02 Jun 2003 07:48:22 -0700, Otto hurled
> >> <020620030748221946%alcoh...@autonomous.org> into the abyss of
> >> alt.tasteless.jokes, where it constantly lurks, whines, and trolls,
> >crapping on
> >> society with 125 bandwidth-killing lines of moronic idiocy...
> >>
> >> <snip>
> >>
> >> >> are you listening to me or are you too busy gabbling your bullshit?
> >> >
> >> >Well, like you say "the source is important" and so is the "agenda."
> >> >Who are you and why should anyone listing to your gabbling bullshit?
> >>
> >> who invited yer fuckwit opinion, shitpacker..
> >
> >No-one gets invited - they all gatecrash
>
>
> ..that was easy
Vanilla Gorilla (Monkey Boy)
in alt.tasteless.jokes:
>>
>> MĞ
>>
>> <sig pending>
><pats nas on the behind>
>
No wonder you're always "under attack from gays".
--
V.G.
"People are more violently opposed to fur than leather, because it is easier to harrass
rich women than it is motorcycle gangs." - Bumper Sticker
(This sig file contains not less than 80% recycled SPAM)
Sarcasm is my sword, Apathy is my shield.
The Return Of GP
--
http://www.geocities.com/mystacy/atjfaq.htm
http://www.mystacy.com/fagboymel/melmorph.html
"marvin" <mar...@pissoff.com> wrote in message
news:3ee2276e$0$13752$afc3...@news.optusnet.com.au...
doesn't seem to work does it roo banger.
A lady is feeling a bit down in the dumps and decides to
treat herself to a meal at the Ritz Carlton. She manages
to get a table that very night and enjoys a delicious meal
on her own -- nothing too extravagant, but nice all the
same.
The head waiter brings the bill and she's horrified to
see the total: $150! She doesn't expect this at all and
asks the waiter "Would you mind holding my breasts while
I write the check please?"
The head waiter is taken aback. In all his years in the
job he's never been asked that before, but always eager
to please the customer, he obliges.
She gets up to leave and the waiter is still perplexed.
His curiosity gets the better of him and he catches up
with her at the door and asks, "I'm sorry to bother you
Miss but I'd like to know why you asked me to do that
just now."
"Oh, it's quite simple really," she replies, "I love to
have my breasts held when I'm being screwed!"
>
>
The Return Of GP
--
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"marvin" <mar...@pissoff.com> wrote in message
news:3ee22777$0$13750$afc3...@news.optusnet.com.au...
is your tongue hard yet roo banger?
There was once a great actor who could no longer remember his lines. One
day he finds a theatre where they are prepared to give him a chance to shine
again.
The director says, "This is the most important part, and it has only one
line. You walk on to the stage at the opening, carrying a rose. You hold
the rose to your nose with just one finger and thumb, sniff the rose deeply
and then say the line, 'Ah, the sweet aroma of my mistress.'"
The actor is thrilled. All day long, before the play, he's practicing his
line over and over again.
Finally, the time came. The curtain went up, the actor walked onto the
stage, and with great passion delivered the line, "Ah, the sweet aroma of my
mistress."
The theatre erupted, the audience was screaming with laughter, and the
director was steaming - "You bloody fool!," he cried, "You have ruined me!"
The actor was bewildered, "What happened? Did I forget my line?"
"No!" screamed the director. "You forgot the rose!"
>
>
The Return Of GP
--
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"marvin" <mar...@pissoff.com> wrote in message
news:3ee2278b$0$13750$afc3...@news.optusnet.com.au...
still trying to get a hard on roo banger?
Guy buys a brand new Jeep Grand Cherokee for $30,000+, and
has $400.00+ in monthly payments. He's pretty proud of this
rig, and gets a hold of his friend to do some male bonding
with the new ride.
They go duck hunting and of course all the lakes are frozen.
These two bright boys go to the lake with their guns,the dog,
the beer and, of course, the new vehicle. They drive out on
to the ice.
They want to create a natural landing area to attract ducks -
something the decoys will float on. Remember it's all ice,
and in order to make a hole large enough to interest a flock
of ducks and a hole big enough to entice ducks to land, they
needed to use a little more than an ice hole drill...Sooo,
out of the back of the brand-new Jeep Grand Cherokee comes a
stick of dynamite with a short 40 second fuse.
Now, to their credit, these two rocket scientists DID take
into consideration that if they placed the stick of dynamite
on the ice at a location far from where they (and the new
Grand Cherokee) would be waiting and ran back quickly, they
would risk slipping on the ice as they ran from the imminent
explosion and could possibly go up in smoke with the resulting
blast. After a little deliberation, they come up with some-
thing less than a great idea of THROWING the dynamite, which
is what they end up doing.
Remember a couple of paragraphs back when I mentioned the
vehicle,the beer, the guns AND THE DOG????? Yes, the dog.
The driver's pet Black Lab (used for retrieving - especially
things thrown by the owner). You guessed it, the dog takes
off at a high rate of doggy speed on the ice, reaching the
stick of dynamite with the burning 40 second fuse about the
time it hits the ice - all to the woe of the two idiots who
are now yelling, stomping, waving arms and wondering what
the heck to do now...
The dog is happy and now heads back toward the "hunters"
with the stick of dynamite. I think we all can picture the
ever-increasing concern on the part of the brain trust, as
the loyal Labrador retriever approaches. Finally, one of
the guys decides to think - something that neither had done
before this moment, grabs a shotgun and shoots the dog. This
sounds better than it really is, because the shotgun was
loaded with #8 duckshot and hardly effective enough to stop
a black Lab. The dog DID stop for a moment, slightly confused,
but then continued on. Another shot, and this time the dog -
still standing, became REALLY confused and of course scared.
The pooch takes off to find cover with a now extremely
short fuse still burning on the stick of dynamite. The
cover the dog finds? Underneath the brand new Grand Cherokee
worth 30-some thousand dollars, the $400.00+ monthly payment
vehicle that is sitting nearby on the lake ice. BOOM!
Dog dies, vehicle sinks to bottom of lake, and these two
"Co-Leaders of the Universe" are left standing there with
the well known " Oh, Shit" look on their faces.
When the owner of the vehicle called his insurance company
he was informed that sinking a vehicle in a lake by illegal
use of explosives is NOT covered on his policy...
He had yet to make his first car payment.
>
>
The Return Of GP
--
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"marvin" <mar...@pissoff.com> wrote in message
news:3ee22794$0$13750$afc3...@news.optusnet.com.au...
better give up and go back to kangaroos roo banger.
A prostitute visiting Australia goes to a bar and sits down
beside a Koala bear. She was bored so she asks the Koala bear if he'd
like a little action. The Koala bear agrees and they check into a
hotel room. She gets undressed and lies on the bed.
The Koala immediately goes down on her, then gets up and jerks
himself off all over her and then quickly heads for the door.
The prostitute says:"Wait a minute. Where do you think you're going?
Aren't you forgetting something?"The Koala say:"Like what?".
The prostitute says: "I'm a prostitute. Look it up in the
dictionary" The Koala looks it up...".PROSTITUTE: one who earns
money by engaging in sexual relations with others for a fee"
He then says to the prostitute:"Well, I'm Koala bear. Look that
up in the dictionary."She does and it says " KOALA: a furry
marsupial, native to Australia; eats bush, shoots and leaves."
>
>
The Return Of GP
--
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"marvin" <mar...@pissoff.com> wrote in message
news:3ee22781$0$13750$afc3...@news.optusnet.com.au...
getting rejected again roo banger?
Three absent-minded professors were talking together in a bus terminal. They
got so engrossed in what they were saying that they didn't notice the bus
had pulled in. As the driver sang out, "All aboard," they looked up startled
and dashed from the platform. Two of them managed to hop on the bus, but the
third didn't make it. As he stood sadly watching the bus disappear into the
distance, a stranger tried to cheer him up, saying, "You shouldn't feel too
bad. Two out of three made it, and that's a pretty good average."
The professor shook his head. "But THEY came to see ME off."
>
>
ur_droll
: On Thu, 5 Jun 2003 22:14:22 +1200, ur_droll hurled
: <pLEDa.10930$JA5.2...@news.xtra.co.nz> into the abyss of
alt.tasteless.jokes,
: where it constantly lurks, whines, and trolls, crapping on society with 21
: bandwidth-killing lines of moronic idiocy...
:
: >"ŃšS-|-MŠ" <mĆŠMĮ×¹@ÅsSremover.com> wrote in message
: >: On Mon, 02 Jun 2003 07:48:22 -0700, Otto hurled
: >: alt.tasteless.jokes, where it constantly lurks, whines, and trolls,
: >crapping on
: >:
: >: <snip>
: >:
: >: >> are you listening to me or are you too busy gabbling your bullshit?
: >: >
: >: >Well, like you say "the source is important" and so is the "agenda."
: >: >Who are you and why should anyone listing to your gabbling bullshit?
: >:
: >: who invited yer fuckwit opinion, shitpacker..
: >
: >"Shitpackers" always make you 'uptight'... eh?..<beg>
:
: no Drip.. my shit will always freeflow for ya
Yup..... forced out between yer teeth when I blow my load up yer arse.
ur_droll
news:ncd4ev0bi09i3ddca...@4ax.com...
: On Sun, 8 Jun 2003 03:57:11 +1000, "marvin" <mar...@pissoff.com> wrote
: in alt.tasteless.jokes:
:
: >>
: >> MĞ
: >>
: >> <sig pending>
: ><pats nas on the behind>
: >
:
: No wonder you're always "under attack from gays".
You think you're attacking him?
Jesus
wrote in message <6p44evohq2c9su2h4...@4ax.com>:
>On Thu, 05 Jun 2003 18:39:00 +0200, Jesus hurled
>>On Thu, 05 Jun 2003 03:34:49 -0600, "ŃšS-|-MŠ" <mĆŠMĮ×¹@ÅsSremover.com>
>>>>as if this fool did anything.
>>>..he got ya to killfile him
>>i drew first blood.
>AIDZ is yer only weapon..
pestilence is part of my arsenal, yes, along with floods, fire, earthquakes,
asteroids, loose foam...
anytime i want you, i just have to whisper your name, and your time is up.
The Return Of GP
--
http://www.geocities.com/mystacy/atjfaq.htm
http://www.mystacy.com/fagboymel/melmorph.html
"ur_droll" <ur-d...@xtra.co.nz> wrote in message
news:jEsEa.15264$JA5.2...@news.xtra.co.nz...
> Yup..... forced out between my teeth when you blow a load up my arse.
taste good kiwi?
There are five things going on simultaneously which need to be taken care
of:
1. The telephone is ringing.
2. The baby is crying.
3. Someone knocks at the front door or rings the doorbell.
4. There is laundry hanging on the line outside and it begins to rain.
5. The water faucet in the kitchen is running.
In what order do you take care of the problems? Jot down your order, and
scroll
down after you've made your decision.
*** Each represents something in your life. Don't cheat.
1. The phone represents...... your job or career.
2. The baby represents...... your family.
3. The visitor represents......your friends.
4. The laundry represents...... your sex life.
5. The running water represents...... money or wealth.
Makes you think, eh??? Hmmmmmmm How close did this test match your
priorities
in Life?
>
>
The Return Of GP
--
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"ur_droll" <ur-d...@xtra.co.nz> wrote in message
news:fFsEa.15266$JA5.2...@news.xtra.co.nz...
> "Vanilla Gorilla (Monkey Boy)" <vgor...@pobox.alaska.net> wrote in
message
> news:ncd4ev0bi09i3ddca...@4ax.com...
> : On Sun, 8 Jun 2003 03:57:11 +1000, "marvin" <mar...@pissoff.com> wrote
> : in alt.tasteless.jokes:
> :
> : >>
> : >> MĞ
> : >>
> : >> <sig pending>
> : ><pats nas on the behind>
> : >
> :
> : No wonder you're always "under attack from gays".
>
>
> You think you're attacking me?
>
>
> Q. What has 4 legs and an arse at each end of its otherwise sluglike body?
>
> A. colin green
Hear about the new game that White House interns play?
It's called swallow the leader.
>
>
Pollywolly
>
> <coming through yer gate>
Sure you didn't get stuck in the gatelatch?
>
> ..that was easy
Was it?
>
> MĞ
>
> <sig pending>
Pollywolly
"ŃšS-|-MŠ" <mĆŠMĮ×¹@ÅsSremover.com> wrote in message
> On Sun, 8 Jun 2003 13:22:12 +1000, Pollywolly hurled
> <bbua5c$71k$1...@lust.ihug.co.nz> into the abyss of alt.tasteless.jokes,
where it
> constantly lurks, whines, and trolls, crapping on society with 17
> bandwidth-killing lines of moronic idiocy...
>
> >>
> >> <coming through yer gate>
> >
> >Sure you didn't get stuck in the gatelatch?
>
You have no hands?
>
> >>
> >> ..that was easy
> >
> >Was it?
>
> <thinking fast>
>
> for me!
>
> after all, yer tight as a drum..
You're not banging my drum
>
> <whew!>
>
> MŠ
>
> <sig pending>
ur_droll
"ŃšS-|-MŠ" <mĆŠMĮ×¹@ÅsSremover.com> wrote in message
: On Sun, 8 Jun 2003 09:16:52 +1200, ur_droll hurled
: <jEsEa.15264$JA5.2...@news.xtra.co.nz> into the abyss of
alt.tasteless.jokes,
: where it constantly lurks, whines, and trolls, crapping on society with 32
: bandwidth-killing lines of moronic idiocy...
:
: >"ŃšS-|-MŠ" <mĆŠMĮ×¹@ÅsSremover.com> wrote in message
:
: >: no Drip.. my shit will always freeflow for ya
: >
: >Yup..... forced out between yer teeth when I blow my load up yer arse.
: _"ass"_
:
: oh wait.. yer a limey transplant
sliding down the back of your throat
Q. What has 4 legs and an arse at each end of its otherwise sluglike body?
A. peter copeman
The Return Of GP
--
http://www.geocities.com/mystacy/atjfaq.htm
http://www.mystacy.com/fagboymel/melmorph.html
"ur_droll" <ur-d...@xtra.co.nz> wrote in message
news:5TVEa.17860$JA5.3...@news.xtra.co.nz...
>
> "ŃšS-|-MŠ" <mĆŠMĮ×¹@ÅsSremover.com> wrote in message
> news:ikp7ev0jh2ba7uu0e...@4ax.com...
> : On Sun, 8 Jun 2003 09:16:52 +1200, ur_droll hurled
> : <jEsEa.15264$JA5.2...@news.xtra.co.nz> into the abyss of
> alt.tasteless.jokes,
> : where it constantly lurks, whines, and trolls, crapping on society with
32
> : bandwidth-killing lines of moronic idiocy...
> :
> : >"ŃšS-|-MŠ" <mĆŠMĮ×¹@ÅsSremover.com> wrote in message
> : >news:9734ev4gpfqbneone...@4ax.com...
> :
> : >: no Drip.. my shit will always freeflow for ya
> : >
> : >Yup..... forced out between yer teeth when I blow my load up yer arse.
> :
> : _"ass"_
> :
> : oh wait.. yer a limey transplant
>
> with cum sliding down the back of my throat
and you call that a warm meal don't you kiwi
There were two buddies, one with a Doberman Pinscher and the other with a
Chihuahua. The guy with the Doberman Pinscher says to his friend, "Let's go
over to that restaurant and get something to eat."
The guy with the Chihuahua says, "We can't go in there. We've got dogs with
us."
The buddy with the Doberman Pinscher says, "just follow my lead."
They walk over to the restaurant, the guy with the Doberman Pinscher puts on
a pair of dark glasses, and he starts to walk in.
The bouncer at the door says, "Sorry, Mac, no pets allowed."
The man with the Doberman Pinscher says, "You don't understand. This is my
seeing-eye-dog."
The bouncer says, "A Doberman Pinscher?" He says, "Yes, they're using them
now, they're very good and protect me from robbers, too."
The man at the door says, "Come on in."
The buddy with the Chihuahua figures, "Why not," so he puts on a pair of
dark glasses and starts to walk in.
Once again the bouncer says, "Sorry, pal, no pets allowed."
The guy with the Chihuahua says, "You don't understand. This is my seeing-
eye dog."
The bouncer at the door says, " A Chihuahua?"
The man with the Chihuahua says, "A Chihuahua?????? They gave me a
Chihuahua?!"
>
>
> Q. What has 4 legs and an arse at each end of its otherwise sluglike body?
>
> A. colin green
>
>
Jesus
wrote in message <8lp7evc4a1jqobolv...@4ax.com>:
>On Sat, 07 Jun 2003 23:48:49 +0200, Jesus hurled
>>On Sat, 07 Jun 2003 10:32:06 -0600, "ŃšS-|-MŠ" <mĆŠMĮ×¹@ÅsSremover.com>
>>>>On Thu, 05 Jun 2003 03:34:49 -0600, "ŃšS-|-MŠ" <mĆŠMĮ×¹@ÅsSremover.com>
>>>>>>as if this fool did anything.
>>>>>..he got ya to killfile him
>>>>i drew first blood.
>>>AIDZ is yer only weapon..
>>pestilence is part of my arsenal, yes, along with floods, fire, earthquakes,
>>asteroids, loose foam...
>>anytime i want you, i just have to whisper your name, and your time is up.
you should see it from space.
><tapping foot>
>..destroy it already, will ya?
i'd rather create than destroy.
nothing is very boring.
The Return Of GP
--
http://www.geocities.com/mystacy/atjfaq.htm
http://www.mystacy.com/fagboymel/melmorph.html
"Jesus" <je...@heaven.universe> wrote in message
news:4va9evg80k45tgagf...@4ax.com...
> On Sun, 08 Jun 2003 19:45:18 -0600, "ŃšS-|-MŠ" <mĆŠMĮ×¹@ÅsSremover.com>
> wrote in message <8lp7evc4a1jqobolv...@4ax.com>:
> >On Sat, 07 Jun 2003 23:48:49 +0200, Jesus hurled
> >>On Sat, 07 Jun 2003 10:32:06 -0600, "ŃšS-|-MŠ" <mĆŠMĮ×¹@ÅsSremover.com>
> >>>On Thu, 05 Jun 2003 18:39:00 +0200, Jesus hurled
> >>>>On Thu, 05 Jun 2003 03:34:49 -0600, "ŃšS-|-MŠ"
<mĆŠMĮ×¹@ÅsSremover.com>
> >>>>>>as if this fool did anything.
> >>>>>..he got ya to killfile him
> >>>>i drew first blood.
> >>>AIDZ is yer only weapon..
> >>pestilence is part of my arsenal, yes, along with floods, fire,
earthquakes,
> >>asteroids, loose foam...
> >>anytime i want you, i just have to whisper your name, and your time is
up.
> >this planet of yers is getting a little mundane..
>
> you should see it from space.
theirs not a rocket powerful enough to take off with your fat faggot ass
onboard fag boy.
>
> ><tapping foot>
> >..destroy it already, will ya?
>
> i'd rather create than destroy.
another lie fag boy.
>
> nothing is very boring.
you're boring fag boy.
LITTLE MISS MUFFET
Sat on a tuffet,
Her clothes all tattered and torn.
It had not been the spider
that crept up beside her
But Little Boy Blue and his horn.
>
> --
> Once you heard, "Believe on the Lord Jesus and you will be saved."
> I tell you now truly that only those who were pre-ordained were sealed for
salvation.
> To see whether you qualify please refer to:
> http://www.savedbyjesus.universe?surname=<your surname>?firstname=<your
firstname>?dob=<your date of birth>
> *******************************
> Read the Official atj FAQ here:
> http://melsqueers.shorturl.com
> *******************************