Truth Telling
Richard Karasik
distinction. (a mouthful) Sort of like you've been told everything that is
strange white meat "tastes like chicken" for so long that you really cant
distinguish them at all -even though they are different to people with
collapsed distinctions.
Your wife in a vaque something is wrong, was entirely right. Something is
wrong. However her collapsed distinctions lead to a viscious circle sort of
like
hmm... You're al f**ked up ..... No, No .. I guess its me who's all f**ked up
....well no , its the world that's all f**ked up .... no realy its you who's
.... and so on.
hitting a cycle and not knowing how to get out is probably the scariest thing
an individual can do. It's like being trapped underwater and knowing you can't
get out, and you're running out of air and .... (I know whereof I speak)
And we all hope for the big hand that reaches into the whirlpool and pulls us
out safe. But that's a fairy tale -or limited to rescue scenes.
THe scary part is reaching in and rescuing yourself. For most people it looks
exactly like shedding everything and going back to a basic state that we
thought we understood. IE not married -with friends making no demands.
This is typical - the way out is not a set piece and that's all I can tell you
having gone through two of these "rapids" sucessfully -there is no recipe
there is only being with the rapids as they occur -not the way you hope the
rapids are, not the way you would rather have the rapids, not home in bed, but
100% with the rapids.
A lot of it takes you and your spouse being your word in the matter, and
having a hard head, not for butting each other, but for absorbing some of the
blows thatthe rapids themselves have to offer.
-----With regard to the lady who mentionned understanding is the booby prize ..
there are many instances and this situation is one of them wherein there is
no understanding -no matter how you trim and punch the situation it defies
fitting a mold you can handle. Be carefull that you don't accept some form of
booby prize rather than the ride through the rapids.
As Bucky Fuller used to say "Learning about navigating isnt navigating"
and often "The only way to learn how to navigating is to navigate"
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