roll of stepmom with adult kids
casablanca
I have been seeing an exwife for about six months. In order to
continue the relationship I have asked her to commit to accepting my
adult children as they are since I cannot change them. They are good
kids and in the past my Ex has pounded on me for what they have done
even though none of it really affected her. I feel that your partner
should be supportive and non combative about your children.
They need to have respect for the step parent and the step parent the
same to them.
One example is my 24 year old daughter is married to a good man who has
long hair and more than a few earrings. If the step parent will not
accept him the way he is my daughter will support her husband. As long
as my daughter is respectful to the step parent she, the step should be
accepting also and not put conditions on my daughter's husband. She
will not be seen with him in certain situations because she is
embarrassed of his appearance. I am very conservative myself but I
love my daughter and want her in my life as well as the step mom. What
is the right thing to do?
I think the step parent has to accept the kids as they are or realize
we are not the right family for her. I want a family unit not a war
zone.
* Sent from RemarQ http://www.remarq.com The Internet's Discussion Network *
The fastest and easiest way to search and participate in Usenet - Free!
lilblakdog
>I think the step parent has to accept the kids as they are or realize
>we are not the right family for her. I want a family unit not a war
>zone.
You've said exactly the right thing, right there. If you don't think you
can have that, you have not found the right woman for you. It's one thing
if the children were abusive and unaccepting of her. But for her to not
want them around, based on the appearance of the people they choose to love
and who make them happy, is simply closed-minded and inflexible.
lil
---
"Who is at fault when a monster is a monster? Is it the monster's? Or the
person who created it to be a monster?"
Anne Robotti
Anne
casablanca wrote:
>
> I am a father who raised his three children alone for the past 10 years.
>
> I have been seeing an exwife for about six months. In order to
> continue the relationship I have asked her to commit to accepting my
> adult children as they are since I cannot change them. They are good
> kids and in the past my Ex has pounded on me for what they have done
> even though none of it really affected her. I feel that your partner
> should be supportive and non combative about your children.
>
> They need to have respect for the step parent and the step parent the
> same to them.
>
> One example is my 24 year old daughter is married to a good man who has
> long hair and more than a few earrings. If the step parent will not
> accept him the way he is my daughter will support her husband. As long
> as my daughter is respectful to the step parent she, the step should be
> accepting also and not put conditions on my daughter's husband. She
> will not be seen with him in certain situations because she is
> embarrassed of his appearance. I am very conservative myself but I
> love my daughter and want her in my life as well as the step mom. What
> is the right thing to do?
>
> I think the step parent has to accept the kids as they are or realize
> we are not the right family for her. I want a family unit not a war
> zone.
>
merrie
to her, then I would think she would find your observed acceptance of him to
also be embarrassing to her.
casablanca wrote in message <0642d4ab...@usw-ex0107-050.remarq.com>...
jane lawrence
>
> If the observed acceptance of your daughter's son-on-law is embarrassing
> to her, then I would think she would find your observed acceptance of him to
> also be embarrassing to her.
Yeah, but, lots of people are embarrassing to be seen with.
Lately, I'm a walking humiliation, even when I'm not chasing a
school bus in bunny slippers.
If the guy's tolerance itself is embarassing to his GF, doesn't
that make her awfully judgmental?
jane