at wits end
Jennifer G.
Slight background: I am a sm to my 9 year old ss whos bm is not in the
picture due to be in jail at the moment. But even before that she wasn't
totally there either.
Here's my problem. My ss recently had to get eyeglasses to see distance.
His bf picked out a frame costing nearly $200 for ss who has a past
reputation of irresponcibility. He can't even find his school assisgnment
book 5 minutes after he puts it in his desk at school etc.
Ss also never takes any responsibility for anything ie. If he doesn't get a
homework sheet it is always someone else's fault for not handing it to him
even though he has been told to go to the teacher and get the sheet then.
Also, if he gets in trouble for something, anything, its never his fault why
he's grounded it is the person who punishes him. Get my drift.
Ss just received the glasses last Wed. and every day after school I have to
ask him to see the glasses to make sure he didn't lose them.(He only has to
wear them to see the board) This Tuesday he didn't have them. He said he
thought he put them in his bag. I told him to double check his bag. Still
nothing. Needless to say, he instantly said he thinks some kid stole them.
His father and I told him to look in his desk in school, to ask his teacher
if she found them and to check the school lost and found. Yesterday,he
still hasn't found them.
This morning his father makes him check his bag agian. There they were, in a
different pocket then they usually are. The father said this whole incedent
was my fault for not standing over ss and watching him look through his bag.
As usual he is enabling ss lack of responcibility and showing him that
everyone around him has to do for him. This kid is 9 not 2. I think by now
he should be able to look for something on his own. He can find his toys
and that special comic book or pokeman card in his mess of a room but I have
to stand over him to find something in his bookbag. Am I being irrational?
Is this really my fault and I should do for him like I do for my 3 year old
nephew. My 5 year old nephew takes more responsibility and care than my 9
year old nephew.
thank you for letting me vent and any and all responces would be appreciated
Jennifer
--
Good luck and good fortune to you and yours.
april...@my-deja.com
year old to at least start taking some responsibility for his
actions/inactions. how else will he learn? BF is not helping his son at
all, by enabling him to continue being "helpless" and attacking you. He
has to realize that you and he, as a parental unit(the "my poor mommy
is around" excuse only holds water for so long), must stand together
and be firm and unanimous in your decisions. We had the same problems
with my SS, who just turned 9. He was forever "forgetting" things,
anything he couldnt find was always "stolen", if anything went wrong it
was always someone else's fault. Finally, we quit helping him out of
trouble all the time....if he forgot his homework, I wouldnt run it to
school, I'd let the teacher deal with him...after 2 warnings and one
detention, he hasnt missed an assignment since. If he left
toys/books/etc lying around, after repeatedly being asked to clean them
up, DH and I would go around with a garbage bag and toss everything
into it, where he cant touch it for a predetermined amount of
time...second offense? It gets thrown or given away.
If he accuses someone of stealing something, and it turns out that it
didnt happen, he is expected to go to that person and offer a sincere
apology....he hates doing his chores, and often "forgets" or does them
half-ass....I no longer say anything, I just wait till allowance day
and he stands there with his palms out expecting to be paid....he hasnt
received a full amount in the 3 months since we first implemented the
chore system(nothing major, just dishes 2xwk, take out garbage 1xwk,
help me with cleaning bathroom 1xwk, and keeping his room clean). There
has been times where he doesnt get anything at all. It's finally
starting to sink in. It takes a while, but they DO catch on eventually.
(my SD is a lot like your ss, she is very irresponsible when it comes
to her glasses....they've been broken more times than I can count, they
are always dirty, she "forgets" to wear them, etc, etc...finally we
gave up. The eye doctor told her if she wears them faithfully for a
year, she shouldnt need them after that...she knows that, but I guess
if she wants to wear glasses the rest of her life, it's her
perogative.) Sure hope you can sit down with your DH and work out
a "plan of attack", so to speak. Good luck, and hang in there!!!!! April
In article <s64apmt...@corp.supernews.com>,
Sent via Deja.com http://www.deja.com/
Before you buy.
Anne Haas
>nephew.
No & no.
>The father said this whole incedent
>was my fault for not standing over ss and watching him look through his bag.
>As usual he is enabling ss lack of responcibility and showing him that
>everyone around him has to do for him. This kid is 9 not 2.
At 9, your SS should start taking responsibility for his behavior. When things
are calmer, you might talk with DH about responsibility concerning his son.
Find out what he feels his son should be responsible for now. Ask him what he
thinks would happen to his son when he's an adult if the boy doesn't learn
responsibility now. Most of us have worked with someone who doesn't take
responsibility for their work/actions. They don't last in the job long
usually.
Does SS have chores around the house? Does he get an allowance based on his
performance of the chores? (My SD only has to keep her room & bathroom clean
and do her own laundry. If her room goes more than one day without being
straightened up, she loses $5 from her allowance.) To me, an allowance is like
a job trial run. If you don't do the work, you don't get paid.
I have found that when I talk with someone about a "volatile" subject, it is
best to get their opinions on the subject and then to ask questions to get them
thinking about the ramifications of the actions being taken. For example, if
we allow SS to not be responsible for his actions now, how could that affect
him as an adult when we aren't there to go to bat for him?
It's not easy to do that. I sometimes have to pull myself short when talking
with DH or anyone about things because I do tend to be somewhat opinionated and
like to express those opinions. *bg* But it is also easier to get someone to
"agree" with you if they think of it with the help of questions to guide them.
:-)
Am I manipulative? Yeap, without a doubt. But I do not manipulate in a way
where it only benefits myself. I told SD one day that I do sometimes
manipulate her but to benefit her - to help her grow into the type of woman
that she has expressed on numerous occasions that she wants to be.
Sometimes we have to engineer the situation so that it's best for everyone
concerned by giving the other person a "way out" where they don't feel like
they are caving in to us or feel rebellious. I did that with SD & therapy.
She needed it & refused to go. She admitted to my best friend that she needed
it, but, God forbid, she would say that to us!!!! LOL. One day, after a
run-away incident, she said that she had told her then latest & greatest that
she did want to change. I told her that maybe he might believe that if she got
therapy. She agreed & I immediately set up the appointment. There's nothing
like a graceful way out. :-)
Best of luck to you, Jennifer, and I hope you will have a wonderful holiday
season.
Anne H.
"To the world you might be one person, but to one person you might
be the world."
Johanna Hazelton
I would also look into some Special Education needs. If his
irrresponsibility has been going on for awhile he may have some sort of
short term memory difficulties and needs some remediation. Repeated
frustrations in this area may have increased his dendancy to lie also
because he's constantly being blamed for things he may not be able to help.
Deciding to get Spec Ed services is one of the hardest decisions to make.
On one hand he may finally get the help he needs to be successful but having
to deal with the stigma of a label is also difficult. I would talk to his
teacher and a teacher of learning disabilities about your ss's difficulties.
Together you may be able to come up with some strategies to try with out him
having to be labled.
Hope this helps somewhat. Good Luck
Jennifer G.
and long. He just doesn't seem to care about anything.
When he couldn't find the glasses at school he came back to me and said in
a flat dead voice, "Oh well, can't find the glasses guess we just have to
sell my toys"
You have to deal with it to understand. My whole family believes my ss
needs some help --therapy-- of some sort to help him with the bad behavior
he seems to have picked up from his bm. The "it's not me it's everybody
else" syndrome. Ie. you see him trip over his desk chair, he blames the
chair; you see him push another kid, he didn't do even thought you watched
him do it and so on. It goes on with everything. He has no respect for
anybody and his bf is finally noticing that, just a month ago it was me just
picking on the kid now the bf is seeing how the ss just does not respect nor
want to respect/listen to anything I say. It has gotten a little better but
at times I feel it has gotten worse.
Ugh, I'm rambling. I need a vacation from my life. Just one week.
Please....
"Johanna Hazelton" <joha...@ix.netcom.compost> wrote in message
news:83tl79$9k6$1...@nntp2.atl.mindspring.net...
Jennifer G.
"Anne Haas" <asta...@aol.comnospam> wrote in message
news:19991223104404...@ng-cu1.aol.com...
> >The father said this whole incedent
> >was my fault for not standing over ss and watching him look through his
bag.
> >As usual he is enabling ss lack of responcibility and showing him that
> >everyone around him has to do for him. This kid is 9 not 2.
>
> At 9, your SS should start taking responsibility for his behavior. When
things
> are calmer, you might talk with DH about responsibility concerning his
son.
> Find out what he feels his son should be responsible for now. Ask him
what he
> thinks would happen to his son when he's an adult if the boy doesn't learn
> responsibility now. Most of us have worked with someone who doesn't take
> responsibility for their work/actions. They don't last in the job long
> usually.
normal for that age. I disagree and I'm the one with the ss the most, bf
works odd hours. I'm sorry but I refuse to serve a very smart 9 year old, as
if I was his maid. I'm not, I'm his sm and he should be learning to do a
little. I bought him a bike 4 years ago that he wanted badly yet he still
hasn't learned to ride it. He puts no effort into anything. He makes me
(an admitted procrastinator and lazy being) feel like I'm doing a marathon
every minute of my life.
>
> Does SS have chores around the house? Does he get an allowance based on
his
> performance of the chores?
out the garbage. But that's all he does but not without a fight.
And yes he gets an allowance, that was something I started for him to help
teach him some responsibility but if he doesn't get his allowance he says we
are keeping it from him. When we inform him that he didn't earn it he says
we are wrong and he did earn it. I've even kept charts on the frig for him
to check off and he still won't see it. And it doesn't help when his
bio-grandparents just give him money for nothing anytime he just asks for
it.
crazy
> can't find it" ? Like whatever he is looking for is giong to jump up and bite
> him in the butt?
I know what its like and I agree with you he should be more responsible
Crazy (bio mom of 3 and step mom of 2)
Dana
on like SS does. I am not sure what to do about the glasses. My SD has
glasses and they always look terrible and they are all scratched up. We
plan to send them off since we have her all week, except, she told me she
can not see with them on. Kepp in mind SD glasses are an inch thick and
when she has them off her eyes cross almost all the way in. She says she
can see better without them. Whew, went way off topic there. Anyway
Jennifer, I think that you may be fighting a losing battle. Does your SS
take well to rewards. Maybe you could give him a sticker everytime he
brings them home in one piece and reward him at the end of the week with
something.....just a suggestion.
Dana
"Jennifer G." <reg...@pioneeris.net> wrote in message
news:s64apmt...@corp.supernews.com...
> different pocket then they usually are. The father said this whole
incedent
> was my fault for not standing over ss and watching him look through his
bag.
> As usual he is enabling ss lack of responcibility and showing him that
> everyone around him has to do for him. This kid is 9 not 2. I think by
now
> he should be able to look for something on his own. He can find his toys
> and that special comic book or pokeman card in his mess of a room but I
have
> to stand over him to find something in his bookbag. Am I being
irrational?
> Is this really my fault and I should do for him like I do for my 3 year
old
jane lawrence
>
> I do not think it is your fault. It seems to me that DH likes passing blame
> on like SS does. I am not sure what to do about the glasses. My SD has
> glasses and they always look terrible and they are all scratched up.
Most kids around here have contacts. They don't get lost or
scratched. They change them once a week, I think, so parental
supervision is pretty minimal. Is that an option?
jane
Dana
close to her eye.
Dana
"jane lawrence" <jan...@excite.com> wrote in message
news:3867AE7C...@excite.com...
Jennifer G.
"Dana" <mid...@icok.net> wrote in message
news:SzN94.27910$Ye.5...@monger.newsread.com...
Does your SS
> take well to rewards. Maybe you could give him a sticker everytime he
> brings them home in one piece and reward him at the end of the week with
> something.....just a suggestion.
>
> Dana
No, he is horrible with rewards. If you give him any reward his behavior
goes from bad to worse, almost like he is thinking that he can now get away
with more. Something else I don't understand nor how to deal with.
Jennifer
Jennifer G.
"jane lawrence" <jan...@excite.com> wrote in message
news:3867AE7C...@excite.com...
> Dana wrote:
> >
> > I do not think it is your fault. It seems to me that DH likes passing
blame
> > on like SS does. I am not sure what to do about the glasses. My SD has
> > glasses and they always look terrible and they are all scratched up.
>
> Most kids around here have contacts. They don't get lost or
> scratched. They change them once a week, I think, so parental
> supervision is pretty minimal. Is that an option?
>
> jane
Contacts is not an option. Doctor said to only wear them when reading the
school board or going to the movies or any other activity where you have to
see distance. He is not to wear them when reading books etc..
Basically the chance of loss is doubled because he has to keep taking them
off then putting them back on, but his eyes are not that bad we just don't
want them to get any worse.
Jennifer
Vicki Robinson
:Contacts is not an option. Doctor said to only wear them when reading the
:school board or going to the movies or any other activity where you have to
:see distance. He is not to wear them when reading books etc..
:Basically the chance of loss is doubled because he has to keep taking them
:off then putting them back on, but his eyes are not that bad we just don't
:want them to get any worse.
Ah ha. Bifocals. I'm not kidding. I had them when I was 12, and my
daughter had them at 10. You don't need to get the kind with
noticeable lines, and they can have plain glass in the uppers (for
distance) and his prescription in the lower lens, for reading.
My daughter's bifocals had the visible lines and no one gave her any
grief about it, but it's not necessary to risk it. And it does get
rid of the need to take them off and put them on 50 times a day.
They'll stay cleaner and collect far fewer scratches.
Vicki
--
Mediation and Alternative Dispute Resolution Resources:
http://www.rit.edu/~vjrnts/mediation/mediation.html
The alt.folklore.urban FAQ and archive can be found at
http://www.urbanlegends.com/
Geri and Brian
>close to her eye.
Or, if she is like my SD, her own grubby little fingers. Yikes! :-)
Geri
~~~~~~~~~~
"Cats don't have nine lives, just two - theirs, then yours."
~~~~~~~~~~
To e-mail us, dump the litterbox. :-)
walk...@eisner.decus.org
> Contacts is not an option. Doctor said to only wear them when reading the
> school board or going to the movies or any other activity where you have to
> see distance. He is not to wear them when reading books etc..
> Basically the chance of loss is doubled because he has to keep taking them
> off then putting them back on, but his eyes are not that bad we just don't
> want them to get any worse.
>
I would think he's too young for contacts anyway.
My daughter will be getting glasses shortly but won't need them for
close-up work either and she's told me that what her friends do when
they take their glasses off is to tuck one earpiece in the top of
their shirts and hang the glasses there so they don't get lost.
Would this work for you? Or how about one of those cords that
he could wear around his neck so the glasses just dangle there when they're
not on his face?
-- GW
Dana
the coin, such as, if he loses the glasses, you take so much of his
allowence for so long. If he does not bring them home everynight, he can
not do whatever for X amount of time?
Dana
"Jennifer G." <reg...@pioneeris.net> wrote in message
news:s6gabm...@corp.supernews.com...
Dana
me insane!
Dana
"Geri and Brian" <gple...@aol.comlitter> wrote in message
news:19991228033919...@ng-cb1.aol.com...
merrie
and therefore feels guilty when he gets one.
Jennifer G. wrote in message ...
merrie
Make sure his teacher knows and that he sits at the front of the class.
At the time I bought older SS glasses, I purchased the kid insurance, which
guaranteed to replace them regardless. (I still can't figure out how they
can offer this.)
Contacts require a bit of maturity - I still don't know if SS (17) is
there yet. He had disposable, and was handling them too roughly and
breaking them. He told me one broke in his eye and we told him he needs to
go back to the eye doctor and have a conversation about this. We're still
waiting.
Merrie
Vicki Robinson wrote in message <8499va$u9g$1...@allhats.xcski.com>...
>In a previous article, "Jennifer G." <reg...@pioneeris.net> said:
>
>:Contacts is not an option. Doctor said to only wear them when reading the
>:school board or going to the movies or any other activity where you have
to
>:see distance. He is not to wear them when reading books etc..
>:Basically the chance of loss is doubled because he has to keep taking them
>:off then putting them back on, but his eyes are not that bad we just don't
>:want them to get any worse.
>
Jennifer G.
> Hummm...sounds like my SD, kind of. Whew.....how about the other side of
> the coin, such as, if he loses the glasses, you take so much of his
> allowence for so long. If he does not bring them home everynight, he can
> not do whatever for X amount of time?
>
have been tried before
Jennifer
Jennifer G.
Jennifer
"merrie" <mer...@svn.net> wrote in message
news:0P7a4.193$CY1....@nntp1-sf.pbi.net...
> A guilty reaction. I would guess he doesn't feel he deserves a reward
> and therefore feels guilty when he gets one.
>
>
> Jennifer G. wrote in message ...
> >
Jennifer G.
> Ah ha. Bifocals. I'm not kidding. I had them when I was 12, and my
> daughter had them at 10. You don't need to get the kind with
> noticeable lines, and they can have plain glass in the uppers (for
> distance) and his prescription in the lower lens, for reading.
>
> My daughter's bifocals had the visible lines and no one gave her any
> grief about it, but it's not necessary to risk it. And it does get
> rid of the need to take them off and put them on 50 times a day.
> They'll stay cleaner and collect far fewer scratches.
>
> Vicki
Thank you, I never thought of that. The next time we go to the doctors I
will bring that idea up to them.
Jennifer
Jennifer G.
> Make sure his teacher knows and that he sits at the front of the
class.
> At the time I bought older SS glasses, I purchased the kid insurance,
which
> guaranteed to replace them regardless. (I still can't figure out how they
> can offer this.)
The teacher will not let him sit at the front. His permenant desk is
located right next to hers. He has this problem called 'ss cannot listen to
anyone what-so-ever.' Besides the class is arranged in groups not rows.
The room is actually not that big.
Jennifer
Jennifer G.
>
> My daughter will be getting glasses shortly but won't need them for
> close-up work either and she's told me that what her friends do when
> they take their glasses off is to tuck one earpiece in the top of
> their shirts and hang the glasses there so they don't get lost.
> Would this work for you? Or how about one of those cords that
> he could wear around his neck so the glasses just dangle there when
they're
> not on his face?
>
> -- GW
would definately lose them, constantly flaring his body and arms. He won't
wear them on a cord around his neck he would thing it was funny, due to the
fact that I wear both pairs of my glasses that way (one for distance and one
for reading -- bifocals give me massive headaches) and both his grandparents
have theirs on cords.
Jennifer
jane lawrence
>
> Neither of these ideas would work for him. If he hangs them in his shirt he
> would definately lose them, constantly flaring his body and arms. He won't
> wear them on a cord around his neck he would thing it was funny, due to the
> fact that I wear both pairs of my glasses that way (one for distance and one
> for reading -- bifocals give me massive headaches) and both his grandparents
> have theirs on cords.
> Jennifer
I probably shouldn't say this. My mother never got the hang of
it. She wore glasses for over 50 years. Even with bifocals,
she took them off and misplaced them all the time. She sat on
them and broke them. She scratched them. She scarred me deeply
by appearing with them held together with a bandaid when I
brought friends from school home.
jane
Newsgroups
> by appearing with them held together with a bandaid when I
> brought friends from school home.
kitley
jane lawrence <jan...@excite.com> wrote in message
news:3869718E...@excite.com...
jane lawrence
>
> >She scarred me deeply
> > by appearing with them held together with a bandaid when I
> > brought friends from school home.
> oh, jane!!! as sad as that is, it gave me a chuckle. do you icq or im?
I hate icq. All I ever get are porn ads. I have IM - janela66,
- which I'll try to turn on more often if you like. I have a
bunch of others, too.
jane
Newsgroups
kitley
jane lawrence <jan...@excite.com> wrote in message
news:38697B31...@excite.com...
Sarai
when I was a kid, I would bring my friends home to my mom wearing granny
glasses. I'm talking *real* granny glasses, the little rectangle shaped
kind that they wear way down on their noses. Lol, but all my friends loved
her nonetheless, I guess because she mothered everyone, and was so sweet.
Heather M.
jane lawrence wrote in message <3869718E...@excite.com>...
>Jennifer G. wrote:
>>
>> Neither of these ideas would work for him. If he hangs them in his shirt
he
>> would definately lose them, constantly flaring his body and arms. He
won't
>> wear them on a cord around his neck he would thing it was funny, due to
the
>> fact that I wear both pairs of my glasses that way (one for distance and
one
>> for reading -- bifocals give me massive headaches) and both his
grandparents
>> have theirs on cords.
>> Jennifer
>
>I probably shouldn't say this. My mother never got the hang of
>it. She wore glasses for over 50 years. Even with bifocals,
>she took them off and misplaced them all the time. She sat on
>them and broke them. She scratched them. She scarred me deeply
>by appearing with them held together with a bandaid when I
>brought friends from school home.
>
>jane
kevin
> Newsgroups wrote:
> >
> > >She scarred me deeply
> > > by appearing with them held together with a bandaid when I
> > > brought friends from school home.
>
> I hate icq. All I ever get are porn ads. I have IM - janela66,
> - which I'll try to turn on more often if you like. I have a
> bunch of others, too.
>
> jane
>
and I'm on ICQ a lot. How come others seem to be deluged with them? Is it
because I don't make my details generally available? Is it because I
always sit in invisible mode? And the other thing - I don't get bothered
by unwanted "what's your ASL?" messages. (Age, Sex, Location). Is it
because I have a male nickname? Does anyone know?
And jane, if you'd ever been on icq in the last few months, I would have
sent you very calm and soothing messages : )
kevin
<who is at this very moment having a discussion on icq with cindy about
the advantages of owning a tennis raquet>
jane lawrence
>
> a bunch of other porn ads or a bunch of other messengers?
Oh shut up, kitley. I have the other pagers, like yahoo and
excite. I think I still have powwow and birch, was it birch?
jane
Newsgroups
turn on your im sometimes. or send whatever you usually have on. i don't
know anything about excite, powwow, yahoo or birch.
kitley
jane lawrence <jan...@excite.com> wrote in message
news:386A5C9E...@excite.com...
jane lawrence
>
>
> >
> What is it with ICQ? . . I get a porn ad about once every three weeks,
> and I'm on ICQ a lot. How come others seem to be deluged with them? Is it
> because I don't make my details generally available? Is it because I
> always sit in invisible mode? And the other thing - I don't get bothered
> by unwanted "what's your ASL?" messages. (Age, Sex, Location). Is it
> because I have a male nickname? Does anyone know?
>
> And jane, if you'd ever been on icq in the last few months, I would have
> sent you very calm and soothing messages : )
Beats me. It drove me nuts. I let it seek the internet
connection on its own. I kept getting beeps from XXX sites and
idiots in Brazil.
jane
Gina
Click on the Ignore Tab.
Make sure you check the following boxes:
Accept messages only from users on my contact list.
Do Not Accept Multi-User Messages from Users Not On My Contact List
Do Not Accept WWPager Messages
Do Not Accept EmailExpress Messages
That will take care of the porn spammers.
Gina
>kevin <see...@cwcom.net> wrote in message news:MPG.12d40b652...@news.cwcom.net...
> In article <38697B31...@excite.com>, jane lawrence says...
> > Newsgroups wrote:
> > >
> > > >She scarred me deeply
> > > > by appearing with them held together with a bandaid when I
> > > > brought friends from school home.
> > > oh, jane!!! as sad as that is, it gave me a chuckle. do you icq or im?
> >
> > I hate icq. All I ever get are porn ads. I have IM - janela66,
> > - which I'll try to turn on more often if you like. I have a
> > bunch of others, too.
> >
> > jane
> >
> What is it with ICQ? . . I get a porn ad about once every three weeks,
> and I'm on ICQ a lot. How come others seem to be deluged with them? Is it
> because I don't make my details generally available? Is it because I
> always sit in invisible mode? And the other thing - I don't get bothered
> by unwanted "what's your ASL?" messages. (Age, Sex, Location). Is it
> because I have a male nickname? Does anyone know?
>
> And jane, if you'd ever been on icq in the last few months, I would have
> sent you very calm and soothing messages : )
>
Anne Haas
Don't know.
<snip>
>How come others seem to be deluged with them? Is it
>because I don't make my details generally available? Is it because I
>always sit in invisible mode? And the other thing - I don't get bothered
>by unwanted "what's your ASL?" >messages. (Age, Sex, Location).
Is it
>because I have a male nickname? Does anyone know?
Don't know. I do. Doubt it. Never got one
on ICQ. Maybe, but I've heard of reverse "harassment."
I don't. I think in the 3 or so years I've had ICQ, even when I used it daily,
I've gotten a total of about 5-6 porn/unwanted messages. I have a rather
provocative nickname on ICQ. (Long joke from long ago and I'm not going into
it. *g*)
Maybe it's the luck of the draw?
Anne H.
"To the world you might be one person, but to one person you might
be the world."
kevin
> In ICQ, go to the Security & Privacy menu.
> Click on the Ignore Tab.
> Make sure you check the following boxes:
> Accept messages only from users on my contact list.
> Do Not Accept Multi-User Messages from Users Not On My Contact List
> Do Not Accept WWPager Messages
> Do Not Accept EmailExpress Messages
> That will take care of the porn spammers.
>
> Gina
>
> news:MPG.12d40b652...@news.cwcom.net...
> > In article <38697B31...@excite.com>, jane lawrence says...
> > > Newsgroups wrote:
> > > > >She scarred me deeply
> > > > > by appearing with them held together with a bandaid when I
> > > > > brought friends from school home.
> or im?
> > >=20
> > > I hate icq. All I ever get are porn ads. I have IM - janela66,
> > > - which I'll try to turn on more often if you like. I have a
> > > bunch of others, too.
> > > jane
> > >=20
> > What is it with ICQ? . . I get a porn ad about once every three =
> weeks,=20
> > and I'm on ICQ a lot. How come others seem to be deluged with them? Is =
> it=20
> > because I don't make my details generally available? Is it because I=20
> > always sit in invisible mode? And the other thing - I don't get =
> bothered=20
> > by unwanted "what's your ASL?" messages. (Age, Sex, Location). Is it=20
> > because I have a male nickname? Does anyone know?=20
> >=20
> > And jane, if you'd ever been on icq in the last few months, I would =
> have=20
> > sent you very calm and soothing messages : )
> > kevin
> > <who is at this very moment having a discussion on icq with cindy =
> about=20
> > the advantages of owning a tennis raquet>
>
>
Kevin
--
EXPRESSIONS FOR HIGH STRESS DAYS
#17. Everyone thinks I'm psychotic except my friends deep inside the
earth.
kevin
> kevin wrote:
> >
> >
> > >
> > What is it with ICQ? . . I get a porn ad about once every three weeks,
> > and I'm on ICQ a lot. How come others seem to be deluged with them? Is it
> > because I don't make my details generally available? Is it because I
> > by unwanted "what's your ASL?" messages. (Age, Sex, Location). Is it
> >
> > sent you very calm and soothing messages : )
>
> connection on its own. I kept getting beeps from XXX sites and
> idiots in Brazil.
>
> jane
>
provocative in there.... I'll let you know :-D
Oh and the other thing that really confuses me is Anne R - She appears on
my list as online about once every blue moon . . and neither she nor I
know why she doesn't appear more often . . .
kevin--
EXPRESSIONS FOR HIGH STRESS DAYS
#13. I can't remember if I'm the good twin or the evil one.
kevin
> jane, I'm just off to look at your details to see if there's anything
> provocative in there.... I'll let you know :-D
>
Fogged
Kevin
--
Old habits can't be thrown out the upstairs window. They have to be
coaxed down the stairs one at a time. - Mark Twain
--
EXPRESSIONS FOR HIGH STRESS DAYS
#10. “Whisper my favorite words: " I'll buy it for you.”
Anne Robotti
once in a blue moon lately. It's just that when I'm on the computer
I'm working or paying bills, and we all know how easy it is for me
to get sucked into a chat for an hour... or two.... and I'm just
overwhelmed right now as it is. Now that the holidays are over I'm
getting organized, and I hope it'll be more sane.
Although there is definitely something weird there, because I know
that sometimes I'm online and Kevin will ICQ me saying, "I took a
chance you were online" when everybody else on my ICQ can see that I
am.
Anne
Anne Robotti
one at all it makes more spam.
Anne
Nicole {Freezing in Wisconsin}
wrote:
> I have a rather
>provocative nickname on ICQ. (Long joke from long ago and I'm not going into
>it. *g*)
Aw, c'mon... not fair to bring it up and then keep us all in suspense
;)
Nicole
*****
I have gone looking for myself. If I return before I come back, please let me know I'm looking for myself.
My Homepage: http://www.fastbytes.com/users/cinirb/
*****
Someone
profile. I took it all out, and *bam* silence :)
Anne Robotti <rob...@worldnet.att.net> wrote in article
<386B4A35...@worldnet.att.net>...
: I didn't put anything in my profile at all. I think if you have
:
jane lawrence
> Nope. Must be one of the most boring users infos I've ever seen : )
It is a talent of mine.
jane
kevin
> > >
> > Nope. Must be one of the most boring users infos I've ever seen : )
>
> It is a talent of mine.
>
> jane
>
kevin
--
EXPRESSIONS FOR HIGH STRESS DAYS
#4. Don't bother me, I'm living happily ever after.