OT: Voice Mail Humor
silver
VOICE MAIL
Most of us have now learned to live with "voice mail" as a necessary
part of
our daily lives. But have you ever wondered what it would be like if God
decided to install voice mail? Imagine praying and hearing the following:
Thank you for calling Heaven. For Hebrew, press 1. For Yiddish, press
2. For
all other languages, press 0.
Please select one of the following options: Press 1 for Requests. Press 2
for Giving thanks. Press 3 for Complaints. Press 4 for all other
inquires.
I'm sorry; all personnel are busy helping other sinners right now.
However,
your prayer is important to us, and we will answer it in the order in
which
it was received. Please stay on the line.
If you require special attention and would like to speak to: God, press
1.
Jesus, press 2. Moishe Rabbeinu, press 3. If you would like to hear King
David sing a psalm while you are holding, press 4.
To find a loved one who has been assigned to heaven, press 5, then
enter his
or her social security number, followed by the "pound" sign. (If you
receive
a negative response, please hang up and try area code 666.)
For answers to nagging questions about dinosaurs, the age of the earth,
life
on other planets, and where Noah's Ark is, please wait until you arrive
here.
Our computers show that you have already prayed today. Please hang up and
try again tomorrow.
The office is now closed for the weekend to observe a religious holiday.
Please pray again on Monday after 9:30 a. m.
If you are calling after hours and need emergency assistance, please
contact
your local religious representative.
Thank you, and have a heavenly day.
Susan Esterby
Very funny, thanks for the laughs!
-Susan E.