Somewhat OT: Mid-Life (Crisis or Crossroads?)
Thea Barbato
I'm once again coming out of lurkdom in a rare moment . . . this time, to
ask your input on my current work/aspiration situation. For one thing,
posting here is cheaper than going to a therapist and I daresay, your sage
wisdom generally rivals that of any Clinical Psychologist anyway (yes, you
may pat yourselves on the proverbial back now : - ). And for a second
thing, it's nice to have women of like age (and mind) to come to when in a
quandary. I don't think this is quite dire enough for the Whines and Woes
though : - ).
Knowing how verbose I can be, please bear with me if I run on too long. As
I may have mentioned during a prior 'coming out of lurkdom' message, it's
probably a mixed blessing that I don't post very often because you would
probably see a sunrise and a sunset before you got through with one of my
posts!
Anyhoo, I'm not really even sure that I'm so much asking for advice as I am
just looking for a sounding board to vent or perhaps even shared
experiences. So, here's the deal. I will be 55 in July and inasmuch as I'm
sure it's better than the alternative, etc., etc., I'm just almost shocked
to find myself at this juncture - like, when did this happen and what
happened to the years after oh, say 35 or 40? I don't feel 55 (whatever
that feels like) and according to some people, I don't look it either. But
here I am, in virtual shock and awe over the whole development! But numbers
aside, the more specific question running through my mind is . . what
happened to my life in terms of making it be rewarding and less about not
doing what I wanted and more about doing exactly what sets my spirit
soaring? And, in my case, that's my art. I used to do art as a small child
and teenager but then got away from it for years until a couple of years ago
when I took a non-curricular drawing class, leading to a renewed interest
and latent talent for it once more, not to mention the sheer love of doing
it.So my dilemma of sorts is that I'm compelled to work full time in the
business world while I'm also trying to go to school for an Associates in
Fine Arts - a two year degree that will take six years or more at the rate
I'm going ( at only one course a semester). Then I recently found out that
I will probably lose my job as of June 30th so I will be on the job hunting
track once again. So my crisis/crossroads is the pursuit of my art vs. the
need to have a steady income, not to mention the funds to continue to go to
school, even at the plodding pace I've been keeping. Seems my primary
recourse is to get another job for income's sake (and yes, I'm married and
he's working, but my income is needed too), continue to go to school as I'm
able and then do my art on the side as time and circumstance allow. I have
considered part-time work and part-time or full-time school options, but
ultimately, I probably need to get another full-time job in order to provide
adequate income. I know none of this is earthshaking and in fact, it's
almost trivial in light of the more serious and profound issues of life that
many face. But still - now that I've rekindled my passion at mid-life, it
would just be nice if it were not such a complicated thing to be able to
pursue it with abandon, instead of working around and with the obstacles
with which life can be fraught! A little bit of independent wealth would go
very nicely with my 'starving artist' future right about now!
A bright note for today is that I sold my first commissioned artwork today -
it was quite inexpensive since it a dog portrait for a co-worker (at a
steal), but it still means I have turned professional!! I even have two
other commissioned works to do as well (mainly pet portraits right now, but
ya gotta start somewhere!!). So it is nice to have validation for my work!
Thanks for allowing, and listening to, my meanderings this evening. I will
be at work tomorrow so won't be able to check asm until the evening, so just
talk amongst yourselves until I get back to sample your succinct words!
Thanks!
Thea
Chakolate
news:Do8fg.17723$JW5....@southeast.rr.com:
> A bright note for today is that I sold my first commissioned artwork
> today - it was quite inexpensive since it a dog portrait for a
> co-worker (at a steal), but it still means I have turned
> professional!! I even have two other commissioned works to do as well
> (mainly pet portraits right now, but ya gotta start somewhere!!). So
> it is nice to have validation for my work!
>
What does it matter if a two-year degree takes you six years? Got
something better to do? You're loving what you do, that's all that
matters. And if you get really good at it, you'll be doing what you
love, as well. :-)
Chak
--
You can no more win a war than you can win an earthquake.
--Jeannette Rankin
Mickey
gallery or museum (provided you live near a large city) and still be able to
take your courses towards your degree. whatever you decide, i think you
should keep at it. never give up something that brings you happiness.
mickey
"Thea Barbato" <tbar...@carolina.rr.com> wrote in message
news:Do8fg.17723$JW5....@southeast.rr.com...
Thea Barbato
Since I have to keep working FT, I don't want to deal with going to school
at the same time for years as well. Then, again, maybe I have too much of
my so called self esteem tied up in that flimsy piece of paper since both my
siblings are college educated (RN and MD, respectively) so I've always felt
like the odd one out. And I'm an inpatient sort when it comes to getting
stuff done, so getting that piece of paper is no different. And yes, I love
the art for sure and that's important to me. But I don't love the work I
have to do for an income (not that it's horrible or anything - it just
greatly pales next to doing art). I guess I just need to do my art when I
can, enjoy it when I do it and look forward to when I can do it again. And
recognize in-between the doing of it that my income producing job is what
provides the resources with which I can create art.
Ah well, what will be will be. Thanks for the pep talk!
T.
"Chakolate" <chakolateDea...@gmail.com> wrote in message
news:Xns97D3EAF5FF103c...@204.153.244.170...
Thea Barbato
I definitely will keep at it. I left it already once in my life and don't
plan to do so again, I assure you. Getting a job at a gallery is a good
idea and I'm in a large city, but it unfortunately is not know for the arts,
but rather, for banking and finance. There are a few galleries (very few)
that I could investigate. But the other thing is that I know I can make more
money in the corporate world and just relegate art to being a side activity.
I think I'll see what doors open (and which ones present themselves to begin
with) as I commence with this next job transition. Could be that I may be
able to possibly work part time and then have more time for school and art.
Thanks for the encouragement! It helps a lot!
T.
"Mickey" <mic...@omega-advisors.com> wrote in message
news:4e5ekuF...@individual.net...