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Have wife and mistress, but still bored

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Bob Evans

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Apr 19, 1999, 3:00:00 AM4/19/99
to
I am very frustrated with my life. I am married to a wonderful
woman. In addition I have a mistress who pleases me in every way. But
I am still bored and need more variety in my life. I am thinking about
divorcing my wife to live a single life again, but am concerned about
losing my assets in divorce and violating my wedding wows. I was raised
to hold them sacred. What to do?


OnMyWay

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Apr 19, 1999, 3:00:00 AM4/19/99
to
dear bob:

find out why you are bored before you do anything. answer this
question and you will probably know what to do about your marriage.
there might be something you would like to do but you are stuck in
some way. i'll bet it has nothing to do with your spouse, only YOU.

plb

Bob Evans wrote in message <9245421...@erols.com>...

ETA

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Apr 19, 1999, 3:00:00 AM4/19/99
to
HOW ABOUT COMMIT SUICIDE?


Bob Evans <bear...@erols.com> wrote in message 9245421...@erols.com...

Rich Zado

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Apr 19, 1999, 3:00:00 AM4/19/99
to

Bob Evans wrote:

[snip...]

TROLL TROLL TROLL......Geesh, they aren't even that imaginative these
days...


Joel Tepp

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Apr 19, 1999, 3:00:00 AM4/19/99
to
On Mon, 19 Apr 1999 12:15:20 -0500, be...@erols.com (Bob Evans) wrote:

>I am very frustrated with my life. I am married to a wonderful
>woman. In addition I have a mistress who pleases me in every way. But
>I am still bored and need more variety in my life. I am thinking about
>divorcing my wife to live a single life again, but am concerned about
losing my assets in divorce and violating my wedding wows. I was raised
>to hold them sacred. What to do?


Use drugs that impair short term memory
Find a woman with Multiple Personality Disorder

Meanwhile, perhaps your wife and mistress would enjoy reading
"Women: Escape the Slavery of Heterosexual Marriage". Together.

J

Oh and one more thing, Use drugs that impair short term memory.

Sourdough

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Apr 19, 1999, 3:00:00 AM4/19/99
to
Not a sheep. I can't think of a sheep story with a troll in it. You need
a goat. There's one in Billy Goats Gruff, I think.

Trent wrote in message <371b6a97...@nntp.ix.netcom.com>...
>Buy a sheep.


Victoria Lee

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Apr 19, 1999, 3:00:00 AM4/19/99
to
On Mon, 19 Apr 1999 12:15:20 -0500, bear...@erols.com (Bob Evans)
wrote:

>I am very frustrated with my life. I am married to a wonderful
>woman. In addition I have a mistress who pleases me in every way. But
>I am still bored and need more variety in my life. I am thinking about
>divorcing my wife to live a single life again, but am concerned about
>losing my assets in divorce and violating my wedding wows. I was raised
>to hold them sacred. What to do?

Come up with a better story than that if you're going to troll.

Victoria Lee

Daisy

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Apr 19, 1999, 3:00:00 AM4/19/99
to
You have a wife that doesn't satisfy you, you also have a mistress that
doesn't satisfy you either....gee, how about a blow up doll? They can't
feel emotions so you can just deflate her and inflate her when the urge
hits?

Daisy
Visit the ASD "Who's Who" Web page at:
http://www.geocities.com/SouthBeach/Cape/6475/
To include yourself send picture and brief biography to:
da...@terraworld.net

Bob Evans wrote in message <9245421...@erols.com>...

Daisy

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Apr 19, 1999, 3:00:00 AM4/19/99
to
My God Trent!! We agree, could this be the start of something big??? :)

Daisy
Visit the ASD "Who's Who" Web page at:
http://www.geocities.com/SouthBeach/Cape/6475/
To include yourself send picture and brief biography to:
da...@terraworld.net

Trent wrote in message <371b6a97...@nntp.ix.netcom.com>...

>On Mon, 19 Apr 1999 12:15:20 -0500, bear...@erols.com (Bob Evans)
>wrote:
>

>>I am very frustrated with my life. I am married to a wonderful
>>woman. In addition I have a mistress who pleases me in every way. But
>>I am still bored and need more variety in my life. I am thinking about
>>divorcing my wife to live a single life again, but am concerned about
>>losing my assets in divorce and violating my wedding wows. I was raised
>>to hold them sacred. What to do?
>

>Buy a sheep.
>
>
>Trent
>
>-- The sad thing about bad sex is that we're able to know the
> difference.
>
>
>

Tazz

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Apr 19, 1999, 3:00:00 AM4/19/99
to
On Mon, 19 Apr 1999 17:40:57 GMT, trent...@hotmail.com (Trent)
wrote:

>On Mon, 19 Apr 1999 12:15:20 -0500, bear...@erols.com (Bob Evans)
>wrote:
>
>>I am very frustrated with my life. I am married to a wonderful
>>woman. In addition I have a mistress who pleases me in every way. But
>>I am still bored and need more variety in my life. I am thinking about
>>divorcing my wife to live a single life again, but am concerned about
>>losing my assets in divorce and violating my wedding wows. I was raised
>>to hold them sacred. What to do?
>
>Buy a sheep.
>
>
>Trent
>
>-- The sad thing about bad sex is that we're able to know the
> difference.
>
>
>

Baaaaaaaaaaa stard,!!


That was funny.!


Tazz


reply to
Bry...@ix.netcom.com

Tazz

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Apr 19, 1999, 3:00:00 AM4/19/99
to
On Mon, 19 Apr 1999 12:15:20 -0500, bear...@erols.com (Bob Evans)
wrote:

>I am very frustrated with my life. I am married to a wonderful
>woman. In addition I have a mistress who pleases me in every way. But
>I am still bored and need more variety in my life. I am thinking about
>divorcing my wife to live a single life again, but am concerned about
>losing my assets in divorce and violating my wedding wows. I was raised
>to hold them sacred. What to do?
>


I think you have only one option.
Homosexuality.

Tazz


reply to
Bry...@ix.netcom.com

Althea

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Apr 19, 1999, 3:00:00 AM4/19/99
to
Uhhhhh, didn't the mistress part already violate those vows?

Althea


Bob Evans wrote in message <9245421...@erols.com>...

Burt

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Apr 19, 1999, 3:00:00 AM4/19/99
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Bob Evans wrote in message <9245421...@erols.com>...
>I am very frustrated with my life. I am married to a wonderful
>woman. In addition I have a mistress who pleases me in every way. But
>I am still bored and need more variety in my life. I am thinking about
>divorcing my wife to live a single life again, but am concerned about
>losing my assets in divorce and violating my wedding wows. I was raised
>to hold them sacred. What to do?


Look up the word asshole in the dictionary.
Next to it you will find your name.

http://www.geocities.com/WallStreet/5169/

Belinda

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Apr 19, 1999, 3:00:00 AM4/19/99
to
hey, get the wife and the mistress together...that should cause some
excitement !!

geezzzz, give me a break !
Belinda

Bob Evans <bear...@erols.com> wrote in article

Donna Tschetter

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Apr 19, 1999, 3:00:00 AM4/19/99
to Joel Tepp
Gret one Joel!

One thing I might to your post would be perhaps that a heterosexual
marriage may the slavery that bores Bob so much.

Bob - there are lots of good men out there ya know!

D.

On 19 Apr 1999, Joel Tepp wrote:

> On Mon, 19 Apr 1999 12:15:20 -0500, be...@erols.com (Bob Evans) wrote:
>
> >I am very frustrated with my life. I am married to a wonderful
> >woman. In addition I have a mistress who pleases me in every way. But
> >I am still bored and need more variety in my life. I am thinking about
> >divorcing my wife to live a single life again, but am concerned about
> losing my assets in divorce and violating my wedding wows. I was raised
> >to hold them sacred. What to do?
>
>

Vicki

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Apr 19, 1999, 3:00:00 AM4/19/99
to
I think you are just bored with yourself :) Happiness and contentment are
not coming from someone else, they are coming from inside of you...


Bob Evans wrote in message <9245421...@erols.com>...

Kim Miller

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Apr 19, 1999, 3:00:00 AM4/19/99
to
You have GOT to be kidding! You cannot be for real. And if you are...I
pity you.

--
Kim Miller
Your Gateway To My World:
http://www.geocities.com/Athens/Agora/4459/index.html
dreams...@worldnet.att.net
eFax: (508) 256-6185

Donna Tschetter wrote in message ...


>Gret one Joel!
>
>One thing I might to your post would be perhaps that a heterosexual
>marriage may the slavery that bores Bob so much.
>
>Bob - there are lots of good men out there ya know!
>
>D.
>
>
>
>On 19 Apr 1999, Joel Tepp wrote:
>
>> On Mon, 19 Apr 1999 12:15:20 -0500, be...@erols.com (Bob Evans) wrote:
>>

>> >I am very frustrated with my life. I am married to a wonderful
>> >woman. In addition I have a mistress who pleases me in every way. But
>> >I am still bored and need more variety in my life. I am thinking about
>> >divorcing my wife to live a single life again, but am concerned about
>> losing my assets in divorce and violating my wedding wows. I was raised
>> >to hold them sacred. What to do?
>>
>>

Daisy

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Apr 19, 1999, 3:00:00 AM4/19/99
to
Maybe we need a good goat picture for the ASD page? The ape is getting old.
:)

Daisy


Songo Man wrote in message <19990419222456...@ng12.aol.com>...


>
>Not a sheep. I can't think of a sheep story with a troll in it. You need
>a goat. There's one in Billy Goats Gruff, I think.
>>>
>

>Whoa. A little competition for the postiion of ASD comedian?
>
>...this was pretty damn funny.
>
>songoman
>
>Beer nuts is the official disease of Milwaukee
>
>

powerpuff

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Apr 20, 1999, 3:00:00 AM4/20/99
to
Isn't Bob Evans a brand of sausage?

PIG!

In article <9245421...@erols.com>,


bear...@erols.com (Bob Evans) wrote:
> I am very frustrated with my life. I am married to a wonderful
> woman. In addition I have a mistress who pleases me in every way. But
> I am still bored and need more variety in my life. I am thinking about
> divorcing my wife to live a single life again, but am concerned about
> losing my assets in divorce and violating my wedding wows. I was raised
> to hold them sacred. What to do?
>
>

-----------== Posted via Deja News, The Discussion Network ==----------
http://www.dejanews.com/ Search, Read, Discuss, or Start Your Own

sapp...@my-dejanews.com

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Apr 20, 1999, 3:00:00 AM4/20/99
to
Bob,

Not to sound rude or anything...but didn't you violate your wedding vows
when you took a mistress? Or did you have different vows than the usual?


Sapphire


bear...@erols.com (Bob Evans) wrote:
> I am very frustrated with my life. I am married to a wonderful
> woman. In addition I have a mistress who pleases me in every way. But
> I am still bored and need more variety in my life. I am thinking about
> divorcing my wife to live a single life again, but am concerned about
> losing my assets in divorce and violating my wedding wows. I was raised
> to hold them sacred. What to do?
>
>
--

Sapphire7

Serious error.
All shortcuts have disappeared.
Screen. Mind. Both are blank.

Michelle Magness

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Apr 20, 1999, 3:00:00 AM4/20/99
to
You've already violated your vows by having an affair!! I don't see why you
should be concerned now.

Bob Evans wrote in message <9245421...@erols.com>...

Songo Man

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Apr 20, 1999, 3:00:00 AM4/20/99
to

Songo Man

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Apr 20, 1999, 3:00:00 AM4/20/99
to
You have a wife that doesn't satisfy you, you also have a mistress that
doesn't satisfy you either....gee, how about a blow up doll? They can't
feel emotions so you can just deflate her and inflate her when the urge
hits?
>>

you're suggesting he should marry my ex wife?

Simplicity

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Apr 20, 1999, 3:00:00 AM4/20/99
to
Get a life!

Bob Evans <bear...@erols.com> wrote in message
news:9245421...@erols.com...

666big...@my-dejanews.com

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Apr 20, 1999, 3:00:00 AM4/20/99
to
In article <9245421...@erols.com>,
bear...@erols.com (Bob Evans) wrote:
> I am very frustrated with my life. I am married to a wonderful
> woman. In addition I have a mistress who pleases me in every way. But
> I am still bored and need more variety in my life. I am thinking about
> divorcing my wife to live a single life again, but am concerned about
> losing my assets in divorce and violating my wedding wows. I was raised
> to hold them sacred. What to do?

I think the best advice I could give to you, even if you had children, is the
following:

1) Would you like your wife to do the same?

2) Ditto your mistress

Now irrespective of your answers, my advice to you is this......

Go fuck yourself, therein finding the only partner worthy of your attention.

Big Surf

trina

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Apr 20, 1999, 3:00:00 AM4/20/99
to
In article <9245421...@erols.com>,
bear...@erols.com (Bob Evans) wrote:
> I am very frustrated with my life. I am married to a wonderful
> woman. In addition I have a mistress who pleases me in every way. But
> I am still bored and need more variety in my life. I am thinking about
> divorcing my wife to live a single life again, but am concerned about
> losing my assets in divorce and violating my wedding wows. I was raised
> to hold them sacred. What to do?
>
>

-- Leave your wife and your mistress and take up golf or something. That will
relieve your BOREDOM and relieve your wife and mistress of being involved
with a man who only loves himself. If you were raised to hold your wedding
vows sacred then why are you fooling around on your wife????

Joel Tepp

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Apr 20, 1999, 3:00:00 AM4/20/99
to
In <7fhmrk$bcl$1...@nnrp1.dejanews.com> trina <tha...@my-dejanews.com>
writes:
>
>In article <9245421...@erols.com>,
> bear...@erols.com (Bob Evans) wrote:
>> I am very frustrated with my life. I am married to a wonderful
>> woman. In addition I have a mistress who pleases me in every way.
>>But I am still bored and need more variety in my life. I am thinking
>>about divorcing my wife to live a single life again, but am concerned
>>about losing my assets in divorce and violating my wedding wows. I
>>was raised to hold them sacred. What to do?
>>
>>
>
>-- Leave your wife and your mistress and take up golf or something.
>That will relieve your BOREDOM and relieve your wife and mistress of
>being involved with a man who only loves himself. If you were raised
>to hold your wedding vows sacred then why are you fooling around on
>your wife????

For heaven's sake, keep this guy off the course. He's going to spend
half an hour on each hole trying to choose a club.
J

Dan Daugherty

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Apr 20, 1999, 3:00:00 AM4/20/99
to
Too bad you're not an engineer. It's the ideal situation to have both
a wife AND a mistress. Because when your wife thinks you are with
your mistress and your mistress thinks you are with your wife, you
have time to do a little engineering. <g>

-- Dan Daugherty

Andre Lieven

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Apr 20, 1999, 3:00:00 AM4/20/99
to

Songo Man (song...@aol.com) writes:
> You have a wife that doesn't satisfy you, you also have a mistress that
> doesn't satisfy you either....gee, how about a blow up doll? They can't
> feel emotions so you can just deflate her and inflate her when the urge
> hits?
>
> you're suggesting he should marry my ex wife?

Ooohh...nasty... and you were married to my ex wife, too ?
>
> songoman

Andre

--
" The noblest achievement of the imagination is to make time run some
other way, and terminate in beauty and forgivness "
David Gelernter, " 1939 "

Andre Lieven

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Apr 20, 1999, 3:00:00 AM4/20/99
to

Joel Tepp (joel...@ix.netcom.com) writes:
> In <7fhmrk$bcl$1...@nnrp1.dejanews.com> trina <tha...@my-dejanews.com>
> writes:
>>
>>In article <9245421...@erols.com>,
>> bear...@erols.com (Bob Evans) wrote:
>>> I am very frustrated with my life. I am married to a wonderful
>>> woman. In addition I have a mistress who pleases me in every way.
>>>But I am still bored and need more variety in my life. I am thinking
>>>about divorcing my wife to live a single life again, but am concerned
>>>about losing my assets in divorce and violating my wedding wows. I
>>>was raised to hold them sacred. What to do?
>>
>>-- Leave your wife and your mistress and take up golf or something.
>>That will relieve your BOREDOM and relieve your wife and mistress of
>>being involved with a man who only loves himself. If you were raised
>>to hold your wedding vows sacred then why are you fooling around on
>>your wife????
>
> For heaven's sake, keep this guy off the course. He's going to spend
> half an hour on each hole trying to choose a club.
> J

....or, do something *very* rude with the holes....which will get everyone
else on the course, " teed " off....

Lori Redman

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Apr 20, 1999, 3:00:00 AM4/20/99
to
Ok, I think we should all thank this troll for some very creative humour on
this list. I have chuckled (guffawed!) more at the ad libs and the one line
zingers than at the regular jokes. What a funny (and I mean haa haa...) group
we are!

Hi Andrei,

How was your latest trip? I'm doing ok.....I am not suffering from boredom
between banks, house appraisers art shows and commissions from art shows!

Lori Redman

Donna Tschetter

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Apr 20, 1999, 3:00:00 AM4/20/99
to
Hey! I resent that, I know the *value and purpose of sex*!!!

...to put a smile on my face....

:)

D.

On 20 Apr 1999, Bje1000 wrote:

>
> NEW BOOK: WHY WOMEN INITIATE 91% OF DIVORCE(win free copy)
>
> Who would have thought that a revolutionary discovery about sex and
> relationships was possible in 1999? But there is one. We were never told that
> women initiate divorce almost all of the time. Such knowledge changes
> everything. Relationships end specifically because women misunderstand the
> value and purpose of sex. Now you can understand the startling truth about the

Swfover21

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Apr 20, 1999, 3:00:00 AM4/20/99
to
I can't believe it....MK....I'm upset that you didn't attack and ridicule this
post.....(only kidding of course)

Ashleigh
*"There is an island of opportunity in the midst of every difficulty"

*"What lies behind us and what lies before us are tiny matters compared to what
lies within us."


Andre Lieven

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Apr 21, 1999, 3:00:00 AM4/21/99
to

Lori Redman (lre...@mc2000.com) writes:
> Ok, I think we should all thank this troll for some very creative humour on
> this list. I have chuckled (guffawed!) more at the ad libs and the one line
> zingers than at the regular jokes. What a funny (and I mean haa haa...) group
> we are!
>
> Hi Andrei,
>
> How was your latest trip? I'm doing ok.....I am not suffering from boredom
> between banks, house appraisers art shows and commissions from art shows!

It was a lot of fun, seeing lots of friends from that area ( west NYS, and
the Toronto zone ). Eeriecon was a very different SF con fron I Con, which
was the weekend before, in Long Island. I Con was sized at about 2,500
folks attending. Eeriecon was more like 150. So, it was much more intimate,
with the guests being very accessable. Good times, good friends, good
conversations... while one can ask for more ( and, I'm working on it ),
this made for a great weekend. Next, is a long one come late May, out in
Michigan. That one, I've been going to, all the way back to the first one,
which was held in '81.

Boredom ? What's that ? With all the travel, catching on communications,
and books and tapes, whenever would I have the time to be bored ? The
question becomes, rather, more of one of what of my choices do I wish
to partake of, now ?

While I've got you on the line... any interest in getting together ?
Group wise, or what ? We can even talk about totally non divorce related
topics. And, call that a general call to the folks reading in the region...
The choices are almost infinite....

Andre Lieven

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Apr 21, 1999, 3:00:00 AM4/21/99
to

Donna Tschetter (Dts...@concentric.net) writes:
> Hey! I resent that, I know the *value and purpose of sex*!!!
>
> ....to put a smile on my face....
>
> :)

And, it's best when there's another face involved, too.....


>
> D.
>
> On 20 Apr 1999, Bje1000 wrote:
>
>>
>> NEW BOOK: WHY WOMEN INITIATE 91% OF DIVORCE(win free copy)
>>

>> ...... Relationships end specifically because women misunderstand the
>> value and purpose of sex. Now you can understand the startling truth....

Raven

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Apr 21, 1999, 3:00:00 AM4/21/99
to
Sorry to tell you this, but you have already violated your wedding vows-
The moment you first THOUGHT about having a mistress. I think the current
situation is VERY unfair to your wife. If she is so wonderful, why
"reward" her with infidelity?

Rebecca

anon...@nowhere.com

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Apr 21, 1999, 3:00:00 AM4/21/99
to
Classic narcissistic personality disorder. Don't do anything, just sit
there, you'll be fine.

Sif

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
"If you can't be kind, at least have the decency
to be vague."
--Oscar Wilde

venus

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Apr 21, 1999, 3:00:00 AM4/21/99
to
In article <9245421...@erols.com>, bear...@erols.com says...

>
>I am very frustrated with my life. I am married to a wonderful
>woman. In addition I have a mistress who pleases me in every way. But
>I am still bored and need more variety in my life. I am thinking about
>divorcing my wife to live a single life again, but am concerned about
>losing my assets in divorce and violating my wedding wows. I was raised
>to hold them sacred. What to do?
>

TROLL!!!!!

(or male nymphomaniac?)

affairso...@my-dejanews.com

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Apr 22, 1999, 3:00:00 AM4/22/99
to
Hi Bob,

This message is for you and everybody else in likewise situations. For
those thinking about having affairs, and for those involved in it
already.

I am not going to judge on you, your life is your business, not mine. I
could judge the things you are doing, but I'm not even going to do that
at this place.

What I will do, is invite you,and everybody else struggling with
extramarital affairs, or even only thinking about having them, to come
to a more supportive and safe place to talk about this.

"Affairs of Secrecy" is a site where people involved in extramarital
affairs talk to and support each other, without judging one another. It
is not a site to promote adultery, but a place to talk about all your
feelings involved. Several visitors have benefited from it, and have a
more clear view of what is missing in their lifes.

Come and visit: http://affairsofsecrecy.virtualave.net/

Love,
Leony


----- Posted via Deja.com, The People-Powered Information Exchange -----
------ http://www.deja.com/ Discussions * Ratings * Communities ------

Gentleman Jim

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Apr 22, 1999, 3:00:00 AM4/22/99
to
You might try growing up! The first step would be to admit that you are a
self-serving, self-centered spoiled brat emotionally. Then again, maybe you
need to explore why you constantly need externals to validate you. True
happiness comes from within. That's a joke about honoring your vows, right?

--
Gentleman Jim
A Country Boy and Refined Southern Gentleman

The song never ends with the singer, the truth outlives a lie, the dream
lives on when the dreamer is gone, and true true love never dies.

...Conway Twitty


Bob Evans wrote in message <9245421...@erols.com>...

World Sales

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Apr 22, 1999, 3:00:00 AM4/22/99
to
Do you have any kids?

Stygia

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Apr 23, 1999, 3:00:00 AM4/23/99
to
In article <7fni2t$bsm$1...@bgtnsc02.worldnet.att.net>,

"Gentleman Jim" <JimHa...@worldnet.att.net> wrote:
> You might try growing up! The first step would be to admit that you are a
> self-serving, self-centered spoiled brat emotionally. Then again, maybe you
> need to explore why you constantly need externals to validate you. True
> happiness comes from within. That's a joke about honoring your vows, right?
>
> --
> Gentleman Jim
> A Country Boy and Refined Southern Gentleman
>
> The song never ends with the singer, the truth outlives a lie, the dream
> lives on when the dreamer is gone, and true true love never dies.
>
> ...Conway Twitty
>
Hmmmm...can you say troll?

If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you.

Wlodek Tych

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Apr 23, 1999, 3:00:00 AM4/23/99
to
I am sorry, but it sounds like one old joke about this
man who had a wife and a mistress, was telling
his wife he was going to his mistress, and to the
mistress that he was staying with his wife, and
then he was going to the library ...

Sounds like a troll to me anyway.

W.


ISIS

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Apr 23, 1999, 3:00:00 AM4/23/99
to
Challenge your mind. Figure out a way to convince your wife, the mistress,
and two other women to share you without an argument! Duh!
ISIS

Bob Evans <bear...@erols.com> wrote in message
news:9245421...@erols.com...

nob...@pcisys.net

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Apr 23, 1999, 3:00:00 AM4/23/99
to
Uh, you have a mistress. Dodn’t you already violate your wedding vows?

In article <9245421...@erols.com>, Bob Evans <bear...@erols.com>
wrote:

Steve Garner

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Apr 24, 1999, 3:00:00 AM4/24/99
to
Your words are so true. I'm in the situation where my husband asked me for
a divorce 8 months ago and still has done nothing about it. Recently he
started dating and sleeping with someone. He couldn't stand her 3 months
ago. He said she was emotionally needy and high maintenance. He flaunts
her in my face. He even brought her to my area of the island where he knew
that there was a good chance I would see them. I know he has a lot of
codependency issues, but he quit therapy at the point when he would have to
dredge up a lot of painful issues. I'm trying to let go but it's so hard.
I have finally started divorce proceeding. He is still dragging his feet at
this point. He owes me over $12,000 for work on the house which he agreed
to pay. He's blown about $30,000 since the end of December, but claims he
wants to lead the simple life. He and his girlfriend go to bars and get
totally fall down drunk, yet he says he is happy. We are going through a
period of not contacting each other so we can break our unhealthy emotional
ties, yet he calls at least once a week. I'm in therapy, reading many
self-help books and generally doing well, but I get in these moods where I
really miss him. We had stopped communicating effectively, but other than
that we are very compatible in every way. He just said he wanted a divorce
and didn't want to try to make it work, but he wants to work on being
friends. HELP!!!! I get so confused sometimes! I know that true happiness
and love come from inside, but he hasn't figured it out yet. I'm tired of
this emotional roller coaster! HELP!!!!


ROBOT

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Apr 24, 1999, 3:00:00 AM4/24/99
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Try thinking with your BRAIN and your HEART instead of your dick- that is if
you have any of the above, TROLL.
ROBOT

Bob Evans wrote in message <9245421...@erols.com>...

Andre Lieven

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Apr 24, 1999, 3:00:00 AM4/24/99
to
The line that most caught my eye was "... but other than that we are very
compatible in every way ". Please, do read what you wrote... you two are *not*
" compatible ", at this time. He wants to be getting falling down drunk in
bars, with some cheap floozy ( what other kind of woman wants to get
falling down drunk with a married man, that she's not the wife of ? ).
Plus, emotionally, he's all over the map, on the matters pertaining to your
divorce.

You *can't* change him, at all. All you *can* do is to establish your
own values and limits. IF you don't want to talk to him when he calls,
then *don't*. There's no need to make something up, just say " I can't
talk now ", and hang up. He can't engage you in phone conversations if
you won't *let* him.

Looking at him objectively, based on what you wrote... he's a drunk,
who has no problem cheating on his wife, heck, he's *proud* of it,
he's blowing the money on.... (exactly), and so on. Look at that...
do you want to be with that ? Can you trust him, now ? Forget what he
was like, when you married him, he isn't that person, any more.

You didn't mention hids, so I'll presume that you two don't have any.
In which case, think of this... if he were somebody that you knew
socially, would you accept such a person into your circle of friends ?
Do you not have a standard for your friends, that both you and they have to
live up to, in order for there to be a friendship ? Speaking for myself,
I don't accaept just anyone's friendship. If one was doing all that your
s2bx was, I seriously doubt that I'd want to continue knowing them.
A preson doing what he's doing, would not be someone who can bring
anything positive into my life, but, very likely, some negatives.

So, once it's over, why would you want to know him ? What about him
boozing, and blowing it all on a floozy, while claiming to want to
live another way, do you find in any way attractive ?

Inform me. I really want to know.

Gentleman Jim

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Apr 24, 1999, 3:00:00 AM4/24/99
to
Extremely well said! I applaud your ability to express what so many of us
must feel.

gwe...@my-dejanews.com

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Apr 24, 1999, 3:00:00 AM4/24/99
to
Having a wife AND a mistress is very convenient. You can always tell your
wife that you are with your mistress, tell your mistress you are with your
wife, and then just slink away and get all your work done.

Boy, women are a big distraction.
(I am not saying I don't like being distracted.)

--
Walt


In article <9245421...@erols.com>,


bear...@erols.com (Bob Evans) wrote:
> I am very frustrated with my life. I am married to a wonderful
> woman. In addition I have a mistress who pleases me in every way. But
> I am still bored and need more variety in my life. I am thinking about
> divorcing my wife to live a single life again, but am concerned about
> losing my assets in divorce and violating my wedding wows. I was raised
> to hold them sacred. What to do?
>
>

-----------== Posted via Deja News, The Discussion Network ==----------

Raven

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Apr 25, 1999, 3:00:00 AM4/25/99
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Hey, Sif, I lost your last email in a crash and wanted to respond. Could
you write me again privately?

In article <01be8bfe$aebf9de0$3d52...@fnord.io.com>,
<anon...@nowhere.com> wrote:

> Classic narcissistic personality disorder. Don't do anything, just sit
> there, you'll be fine.
>
> Sif
>
> ++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
> "If you can't be kind, at least have the decency
> to be vague."
> --Oscar Wilde

Raven

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Apr 25, 1999, 3:00:00 AM4/25/99
to
Yeah, Trent, but that would be animal cruelty...

Rebecca

In article <371b6a97...@nntp.ix.netcom.com>, trent...@hotmail.com
(Trent) wrote:

> On Mon, 19 Apr 1999 12:15:20 -0500, bear...@erols.com (Bob Evans)
> wrote:
>
> >I am very frustrated with my life. I am married to a wonderful
> >woman. In addition I have a mistress who pleases me in every way. But
> >I am still bored and need more variety in my life. I am thinking about
> >divorcing my wife to live a single life again, but am concerned about
> >losing my assets in divorce and violating my wedding wows. I was raised
> >to hold them sacred. What to do?
>

> Buy a sheep.
>
>
> Trent
>
> -- The sad thing about bad sex is that we're able to know the
> difference.
>

obe...@atcon.com

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Apr 25, 1999, 3:00:00 AM4/25/99
to
bear...@erols.com (Bob Evans) wrote:

>I am very frustrated with my life. I am married to a wonderful
>woman. In addition I have a mistress who pleases me in every way. But
>I am still bored and need more variety in my life. I am thinking about
>divorcing my wife to live a single life again, but am concerned about
>losing my assets in divorce and violating my wedding wows. I was raised
>to hold them sacred. What to do?

. . .Ya, right.
I'm actually the Pope; but, lately I've been shagging 15 year old
novice nuns in the back of my pope-mobile.
Please respond. . .does this make me a not-nice person?

Father Guido Sardu. . .oops, I mean, the Pope
/ __ \ / /_ ___ _ __ ____ _ ___ ____
/ / / / / __ \/ _ \ | /| / // __ ` / / __ \ / __ /
/ /_/ / / /_/ / __/ |/ |/ // /_// / / / / / / /
\____/ /_.___/\___/|__/|__/ \__,_/ /_/ /_/


anon...@nowhere.com

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Apr 25, 1999, 3:00:00 AM4/25/99
to
Sorry Babes, On Usenet I remain anonymous. I get enough spam as it is.
However, please feel free to flame me as much as you wish in public.

Sif

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
"If you can't be kind, at least have the decency
to be vague."
--Oscar Wilde

Raven <ther...@unforgettable.com> wrote in article
<theraven-240...@pnc-usr-ppp-8.fullnet.net>...


> Hey, Sif, I lost your last email in a crash and wanted to respond. Could
> you write me again privately?
>
> In article <01be8bfe$aebf9de0$3d52...@fnord.io.com>,
> <anon...@nowhere.com> wrote:
>
> > Classic narcissistic personality disorder. Don't do anything, just sit
> > there, you'll be fine.
> >
> > Sif
> >
> > ++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
> > "If you can't be kind, at least have the decency
> > to be vague."
> > --Oscar Wilde

je...@pc2u.com

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Apr 25, 1999, 3:00:00 AM4/25/99
to

>> >losing my assets in divorce and violating my wedding wows. I was raised
>> >to hold them sacred. What to do?


If youre still getting plenty of WOWS with your wife why look
elsewhere ........ why worry asshole youre a loser already S : - (


>>
>> --

>>


Raven

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Apr 26, 1999, 3:00:00 AM4/26/99
to
Actually, I wasn't planning to flame you. I just asked you to email me
privately so your address woulnd't show up on the newsgroup. I wanted to
respond to your last message (message accidentally posted to me...)

Rebecca

In article <01be8f4a$7ff88d60$6252...@fnord.io.com>,
<anon...@nowhere.com> wrote:

Robert

unread,
Apr 28, 1999, 3:00:00 AM4/28/99
to
I really dont think your wife of your mistress are the question here, I
really think you need to drop the mistress, and seek some therapy.
This is not normal behavior you were not put on this earth to be entertained
you are only hurting yourself, your wife and your family.
PLEASE get some help there may be an underlining factor here that you are
not aware of it is possible your suffering from depression, other than that
I would generally say your being very selfish and cruel to those who love
you the most Get Some Help

Robert


666big...@my-dejanews.com <666big...@my-dejanews.com> wrote in
message <7fh1oj$pie$1...@nnrp1.dejanews.com>...


>In article <9245421...@erols.com>,
> bear...@erols.com (Bob Evans) wrote:

>> I am very frustrated with my life. I am married to a wonderful
>> woman. In addition I have a mistress who pleases me in every way. But
>> I am still bored and need more variety in my life. I am thinking about
>> divorcing my wife to live a single life again, but am concerned about
>> losing my assets in divorce and violating my wedding wows. I was raised
>> to hold them sacred. What to do?
>

>I think the best advice I could give to you, even if you had children, is
the
>following:
>
>1) Would you like your wife to do the same?
>
>2) Ditto your mistress
>
>Now irrespective of your answers, my advice to you is this......
>
>Go fuck yourself, therein finding the only partner worthy of your
attention.
>
>Big Surf

Kate Garner

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Apr 28, 1999, 3:00:00 AM4/28/99
to
Thanks for your reply. You are right in every way. We are compatible when
we are alone together and talking, but we aren't compatible in any other
way. My life is taking a completely different path. I've started
watercolor painting, renewing my interest in classical music and getting
involved in many worthwhile projects that benefit the island.

My friends now are all wonderful, caring people who do more than hang out in
bars. In fact, I go to bars less now than I did while living with my
husband. I don't want to be part of the bar and gossip crowd. It's so
shallow. Most of the people you meet there would not fit into my current
circle of friends. Some of my former friends have stopped being my friends.
It hurt at first, especially when my best friend became my husband's good
friend. I realize now that those friends were never true friends. They are
all part of the bar crowd, emotionally needy and for the most part
financially irresponsible. NO--I don't want friends like that.

I started screening my calls a few weeks ago. Of course, his calls
increased. I wrote him a letter last week asking him not to call me. I
told him that this move was not out of anger, hurt or resentment (which it
isn't), but it is what I need to do so I can heal and move on with my life.
He would leave phone messages saying he had some issue to discuss. In my
letter, I asked him to discuss these issues via mail. I haven't received
any of those issues yet.

I have been supporting us for the last two years, but he feels he deserves
half of everything. Forget that!!! I have an excellent attorney and will
go to litigation if need be to get my fair share. He's made about 6% of the
income I have brought in.

I am regaining my self-esteem and independence. I know everything you say
is true, but it is taking a long time for me to internalize what I know in
my head. Reading messages like yours help me to get this knowledge inside.

I've been making excuses for his behavior because I know what many of his
internal issues are and the struggle he is going through. But the truth of
the matter is that I FIND HIS BEHAVIOR TOTALLY UNACCEPTABLE TO ME. He has
the right to be whatever he wants to be, but I don't have to be any part of
it. It appears he has no moral values whatsoever and no respect for others,
especially women. I will not go back to being the person I was 8 months
ago.

I am happier with myself than I have ever been in my life. My relationship
with my parents has improved so much. I'm back to be the kind, giving,
interesting person I used to be. Recently, a good friend of both my stbx
and mine came to visit me. She told me she's always liked me but she likes
the new me even better. I gave her the option of seeing my stbx, but she
declined. She realizes he has never truly been a friend to her.

Anyway---enough rambling. I hope you will continue to send me messages.
They really help me to see more clearly. Many thanks, Kate (I'm now
posting as Kate Garner instead of Steve Garner. Finally figured out how to
change the name!)


amaluck

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Apr 29, 1999, 3:00:00 AM4/29/99
to

and i'll just bet both your wife and Mistress are bored even more than
you are.

Bob Evans wrote:
>
> I am very frustrated with my life. I am married to a wonderful
> woman. In addition I have a mistress who pleases me in every way. But
> I am still bored and need more variety in my life. I am thinking about
> divorcing my wife to live a single life again, but am concerned about
> losing my assets in divorce and violating my wedding wows. I was raised
> to hold them sacred. What to do?

--


AMALUCK

ICQ #35013944

Ronni Worth

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May 1, 1999, 3:00:00 AM5/1/99
to
> Bob Evans wrote:
> > I am very frustrated with my life. I am married to a wonderful
> > woman. In addition I have a mistress who pleases me in every way.
> > I am thinking about divorcing my wife to live a single life again,
> > but am concerned about [snip] violating my wedding wows.

Bob:
Which exactly wedding vows would those be, that you're concerned about
violating???
-----------------------------------------------------------------
Ronni
<wor...@hotmail.com>
"Some day I am going to grow wings" [from RadioHead's "Let Down"]

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