lilpddle and can't and tuttle
Puddles
need help. toll t needed help but he didn't. don't think he can anyway.
trying to learn to be fraid without erasing or going away or being lost
and just being ok to feel fear. but not don't like it and is feel like i
am going to go crazy.
i don't like fear. i don't want to feel it or be it or tolerate it and
maybe i could go away but i think is new rule now that not allowed to do
that right now because have to be safe.
this socks. but im here.
:)
i know no one knows what the heck i am talking about. its ok, i don't
know either. i am just trying to stay present.
Emerging Butterfly
i think i get some of this. it is agonizing being present for feelings
that before you dissociated away?
you desperately want someone to make the pain go away but are
tolerating, however painfully, the presence of the pain?
sounds like you're bein very very brave.
is okay. :)
fuzzy
think we sort under stand
is hard stuff
sorry we not much words
Emerging Butterfly
>
> - Show quoted text -
you hide too?
astri
> maybe need help help help and maybe not. maybe is now and then but
> don't need help. toll t needed help but he didn't. don't think he can
> anyway.
is now
now is real
isn't then
is now
> trying to learn to be fraid without erasing or going away or being
> lost and just being ok to feel fear. but not don't like it and is
> feel like i am going to go crazy.
is hard
you not crazy
you not going crazy
now is real
> i don't like fear. i don't want to feel it or be it or tolerate it
> and maybe i could go away but i think is new rule now that not
> allowed to do that right now because have to be safe.
understand
real fear about real things is a way to let body know stay safe
> this socks. but im here.
>
> :)
>
> i know no one knows what the heck i am talking about. its ok, i don't
> know either. i am just trying to stay present.
k
-- astri
======================
to email send to astri
======================
at volcano dot org
======================
jill
Puddles <allthe...@yahoo.com> wrote:
>maybe need help help help and maybe not. maybe is now and then but don't
>need help. toll t needed help but he didn't. don't think he can anyway.
>
>trying to learn to be fraid without erasing or going away or being lost
>and just being ok to feel fear. but not don't like it and is feel like i
>am going to go crazy.
Oh yeah, I know what you mean. It is really hard when you start to
look at the ptsd stuff and try new things to change it around. Yep, if
feels just like going crazy when you are being afraid and not erasing.
You are NOT going crazy, you are learning and growing and healing.
It is just really hard and scary but you are strong enough to do it.
>i don't like fear. i don't want to feel it or be it or tolerate it and
>maybe i could go away but i think is new rule now that not allowed to do
>that right now because have to be safe.
Yep. Try hugging a stuffie or curling up in the closet or wrapping in
a blanket. Think of what you would do with a for real external child
who was feeling this feeling. Treat the body that way.
Feelings just are. They can't hurt you. Now is not then.
>this socks. but im here.
>
>:)
>
>i know no one knows what the heck i am talking about. its ok, i don't
>know either. i am just trying to stay present.
It is worth the energy and scariness of learning this. In the long run
you will have mastered a new skill that will work much better for you
now. What you did in the past worked well then but not is not then so
you need new skills.
Rainbow Colors (Jill)
Puddles
thank you eb. :)
Puddles
is jus good to know your here. ty. :)
Puddles
> On Mon, 29 Jun 2009, Puddles wrote:
>
>> maybe need help help help and maybe not. maybe is now and then but
>> don't need help. toll t needed help but he didn't. don't think he can
>> anyway.
>
> is now
> now is real
> isn't then
> is now
can it be both at same time???
>
>> trying to learn to be fraid without erasing or going away or being
>> lost and just being ok to feel fear. but not don't like it and is
>> feel like i am going to go crazy.
>
> is hard
> you not crazy
> you not going crazy
> now is real
i think im a nut
>
>> i don't like fear. i don't want to feel it or be it or tolerate it
>> and maybe i could go away but i think is new rule now that not
>> allowed to do that right now because have to be safe.
>
> understand
> real fear about real things is a way to let body know stay safe
and cant breath. t says cant breath is normal for anyone with fear and
its not smoke. but it feels like smoke.
Puddles
i like the best that you wrote that feelings cant hurt you. maybe
sometimes we forget this. seems like they do. seems like they go right
along with physcial hurts.
hmmmm. got me thinking on this one Jill.....
astri
> astri wrote:
>> On Mon, 29 Jun 2009, Puddles wrote:
>>
>>> maybe need help help help and maybe not. maybe is now and then but
>>> don't need help. toll t needed help but he didn't. don't think he
>>> can anyway.
>>
>> is now
>> now is real
>> isn't then
>> is now
>
> can it be both at same time???
no
now can remind you of then
an can send you to then
but not can be both at same time
>>> trying to learn to be fraid without erasing or going away or being
>>> lost and just being ok to feel fear. but not don't like it and is
>>> feel like i am going to go crazy.
>>
>> is hard
>> you not crazy
>> you not going crazy
>> now is real
>
> i think im a nut
you not
>>> i don't like fear. i don't want to feel it or be it or tolerate it
>>> and maybe i could go away but i think is new rule now that not
>>> allowed to do that right now because have to be safe.
>>
>> understand
>> real fear about real things is a way to let body know stay safe
>
> and cant breath. t says cant breath is normal for anyone with fear
> and its not smoke. but it feels like smoke.
understand
jill
But the 'hurt' is a then hurt, not a now hurt.
Feelings just are. Really. I didn't believe it either but it is true.
Rainbow Colors (Jill)
Puddles
i miss my dad.
Puddles
think fear hurts most.
fuzzy
:(
that must feel really sad.
astri
> i miss my dad.
regrets
Puddles
only sometimes. only when i remember. i was little. i was 6. so i don't
remember very good.
fuzzy
k
think it's ok to remember sometimes. is ok if you don't remember lots,
you were little then
EB
> In article <7avurpF20msr0...@mid.individual.net>,> >> In article <7atbteF21482t...@mid.individual.net>,
i don't believe feelings just are. i mean, i know they aren't to be
labelled as good or bad. but i think they're indicators and they're
there for reasons.
jill
EB <hopec...@live.com> wrote:
>On Jul 1, 7:23=A0pm, j...@tuells.org (jill) wrote:
>> In article <7avurpF20msr0...@mid.individual.net>,
>>
>>
>>
>> Puddles =A0<allthepudd...@yahoo.com> wrote:
>> >jill wrote:
>> >> In article <7atbteF21482t...@mid.individual.net>,
>> >>> maybe need help help help and maybe not. maybe is now and then but do=
>n't
>> >>> need help. toll t needed help but he didn't. don't think he can anywa=
>y.
>>
>> >>> trying to learn to be fraid without erasing or going away or being lo=
>st
>> >>> and just being ok to feel fear. but not don't like it and is feel lik=
>e i
>> >>> am going to go crazy.
>>
>> >> Oh yeah, I know what you mean. It is really hard when you start to
>> >> look at the ptsd stuff and try new things to change it around. Yep, if
>> >> feels just like going crazy when you are being afraid and not erasing.
>> >> You are NOT going crazy, you are learning and growing and healing.
>>
>> >> It is just really hard and scary but you are strong enough to do it.
>>
>d
>> >>> maybe i could go away but i think is new rule now that not allowed to=
Oh, absolutely! I didn't mean they aren't connected to stuff. Of
course they are indicators and have a purpose.
I mean, they just are. You can change a behavior. You can decide to
act a certain way, but feelings just are. They aren't under your
control and don't mean you are a good or bad person just because you
feel one way or another.
Feelings are like breathing or blinking. They exist within the body
just because. You can focus on them and learn a whole bunch, you can
ignore them and maybe have side effects. But you can't say 'I am not
going to feel x about this situation'. If you pay attention to a
feeling you can learn and grow and change, but you can't insist that
the feeling be something it isn't.
Unlike behaviors or beliefs. Those can be changed, ignored, modified.
Rainbow Colors (Jill)
EB
> In article <184dd337-095d-46a5-9a3f-d00c1b0e9...@24g2000yqm.googlegroups.com>,
i think i see what you're saying and can agree with that.