antipsychotics and brain damage
jackf...@my-deja.com
to add my own experience to this. I was diagnosed with bipolar
disorder, and given lithium, and Risperdal, in the hospital. I left
the hospital after 19 days, and then tried to quit the drugs cold-
turkey. I was unable to do so. In trying to do so, I found that I
could not sleep, that I had tremendous difficulty being still, that
after two days, I started having pain all over.
I went to the ER of a hospital, was given Zyprexa, and took it for two
nights. Then I was back on the lithium and the Risperdal. I
voluntarily went back to the hospital again because I felt incredibly
weak after that, and stayed there for 4 days, on lithium and Zyprexa.
I left and tried to get off of that again, only this time, gradually.
I couldn't, because of the pain that came after I hit 300 mg of
lithium, and then went into a depression. I finally got off, and then
started using Depakote. I was given Seroquel once, and then stopped it
because it completely rigidified my thinking. I later took some
Wellbutrin, but stopped that because it gave me dry mouth and didn't
seem to help. I was then given Zyprexa again, to counter delusional
thinking on my part while depressed. I don't believe it was delusional-
-just extremely guilt-ridden, and anxiety ridden.
One more trip to the hospital, for 4 days, because the pdoc thought it
was a good idea, and then Zyprexa on and off because I it screwed up my
thinking ability and I wanted to be able to think. I finally stopped
it on my own, against my pdoc's advice. It's been a month now, and I
still can't think clearly. It's as if a part of my brain has been shut
down. I wonder if this is permanent, or if it'll pass with time, or if
there's anything that can be done about it.
Thanks,
--
Jack
Sent via Deja.com http://www.deja.com/
Before you buy.
LostboyinNC
meds on their own! The reason you cant think clearly is due to the fact
you are very mentally ill and are bipolar. Not because the meds messed
your thinking up. Unless you had a drug/drug interaction or something
with all those meds you were on, those meds were most likely helping
you a lot. I would suggest going back on something, before your disease
kills you or you land up in jail or something.
Eric
"Well I fucked a sheep, I fucked a goat, I ran my
cock right down its throat" Metallica "So fucking What?
Steroids caused my depression...prednisone should be used conservatively
jackf...@my-deja.com
> -- Jack, you are a stupid fuck. A bipolar should NEVER go off their
> meds on their own! The reason you cant think clearly is due to the
fact
> you are very mentally ill and are bipolar.
I was an undiagnosed bipolar for at least 12 years. My first manic
episode was in 1988. It passed, and I was okay, without any
medication. I was able to think during, before, and after. I've never
had a depressive episode until after I started taking the medication.
This time, though, I took the medication, unwillingly, and got stuck on
it.
Not because the meds messed
> your thinking up.
Meds can mess your thinking up. Usually, the longer you're on them,
and the greater the dose, the greater the chance that something bad
happens, especially with antipsychotics.
Unless you had a drug/drug interaction or something
> with all those meds you were on, those meds were most likely helping
> you a lot. I would suggest going back on something,
I don't know. I'd rather give my brain a chance to recover. See what
it's like, and how far I can go without meds. If it's necessary, and
if it seems right, I'll go back on them. Being unable to think is not,
by the way, my idea of being helped a lot.
before your disease
> kills you or you land up in jail or something.
>
> Eric
>
--
Jack
lord_terabyte_and_th...@cox-internet.com
>I wonder if this is permanent, or if it'll pass with time, or if
>there's anything that can be done about it.
And now I remember your previous posts, and the problem is VERY clear.
You consistently refuse to comply with treatment!
You get out of the hospital and immediately quit taking whatever
medicine it was that made it possible for you to be discharged in the
first place. You are putting yourself back into the hospital...over
and over again...where you only had to be in the hospital one time you
cause yourself to return many times.
You are wasting scarce mental health resources, because you refuse to
take your medicine. You don't even try to wait long enough to see if
the side effects will subside...and your side effects are mild
compared to those of many other people who have stuck it out.
It is not your fault that you are ill, but you are causing harm to
yourself...you are making it less likely that medicine will ever be
able to control your symptoms...you are increasing the severity of
your illness...things will get worse and worse until you get serious
about being well.
lord_terabyte_and_th...@cox-internet.com
>LostboyinNC <lostb...@my-deja.com> wrote:
>> -- Jack, you are a stupid fuck. A bipolar should NEVER go off their
>> meds on their own! The reason you cant think clearly is due to the
>fact
>> you are very mentally ill and are bipolar.
>
>I was an undiagnosed bipolar for at least 12 years. My first manic
>episode was in 1988. It passed, and I was okay, without any
>medication. I was able to think during, before, and after. I've never
>had a depressive episode until after I started taking the medication.
>This time, though, I took the medication, unwillingly, and got stuck on
>it.
>
>
>
>
> Not because the meds messed
>> your thinking up.
>
>Meds can mess your thinking up. Usually, the longer you're on them,
>and the greater the dose, the greater the chance that something bad
>happens, especially with antipsychotics.
>
>
>
>
>
> Unless you had a drug/drug interaction or something
>> with all those meds you were on, those meds were most likely helping
>> you a lot. I would suggest going back on something,
>
>I don't know. I'd rather give my brain a chance to recover.
You are fantasizing. What you are actually doing is giving the illness
time to get stronger.
> See what
>it's like, and how far I can go without meds. If it's necessary, and
>if it seems right, I'll go back on them. Being unable to think is not,
>by the way, my idea of being helped a lot.
Here it is:
Your self described history of hospitalization makes it very clear
that you can not go without medication.
Your self described history of non compliance makes it very clear that
you will have to take every increasing doses of medication each time a
hospitalization is required, and because of that the side effects you
are whining about will only get worse.
eli...@my-deja.com
jackf...@my-deja.com wrote:
>I was given Seroquel once, and then stopped it
> because it completely rigidified my thinking.
I'm curious to know what you mean by "rigidify"
>It's been a month now, and I
> still can't think clearly. It's as if a part of my brain has been
shut
> down. I wonder if this is permanent, or if it'll pass with time, or
if
> there's anything that can be done about it.
>
I wd. think it wd. pass. If it doesn't, this may not be effect of drug
but of your own brain. Have you had this experience before?
Eliza
LostboyinNC
back on your meds soon before you end up dead or in prison.
Eric
--
"Well I fucked a sheep, I fucked a goat, I ran my
cock right down its throat" Metallica "So fucking What?
Steroids caused my depression...prednisone should be used conservatively
Sent via Deja.com http://www.deja.com/
Before you buy.
jackf...@my-deja.com
> Excuses, excuses Jack. Jack, if you are a manic depressive PLEASE go
> back on your meds soon before you end up dead or in prison.
You don't seem to read very well. I said that the meds, at least some
of them, caused the current side-effects. I do care about the manic
depression, but I care about the current side-effects more. Even if
you don't think so, meds, especially antipsychotics, can cause
extremely negative effects.
--
Jack
jackf...@my-deja.com
> In article <8r5cst$816$1...@nnrp1.deja.com>,
> jackf...@my-deja.com wrote:
> >I was given Seroquel once, and then stopped it
> > because it completely rigidified my thinking.
>
> I'm curious to know what you mean by "rigidify"
Thanks for the reply. :)
I could only think in straight lines. It's almost as if my brain were
frozen. No depth. No ability to see clearly. I could think one step
at time but even then it felt like being in a vise.
>
> >It's been a month now, and I
> > still can't think clearly. It's as if a part of my brain has been
> shut
> > down. I wonder if this is permanent, or if it'll pass with time, or
> if
> > there's anything that can be done about it.
> >
>
> I wd. think it wd. pass. If it doesn't, this may not be effect of
drug
> but of your own brain.
Doubtful.
Have you had this experience before?
No.
bleak low
for a couple of months and felt sub human on it . I was reduced to eat
shit, sleep. But at the time I knew it was marginally better than being
in hospital and it certainly stopped me running round.
So I'd say stay on the meds ..they're shit but may be better than the
other...but don't be shy about talking to your doc about getting off
them when you're feeling more lucid..they're too happy to let it
languish .
mothra
Moonstone29
Although I do not know your particular situation I agree with you that these
drugs can do more harm than good for some people.In addition,I think one can
get into an endless cycle of drug taking trying to cover up side effects.For
myself I believe I probably have latent bi-polar chemistry that becomes exposed
by these psychoactive drugs.This is particularly true when I attempt to
withdraw from them.I will never stop trying because I know my own system will
work better without the meds.I am not prone to wild mood swings and nobody who
has ever lived with me thinks it is possible that I am bi-polar.However,I
suspect it may be true given some of the reactions I have had on these types of
medications.
If you know it is true for you that these drugs cause you more harm than good
stick to your truth.Know one can really tell but you.Try to be as honest about
it as you can.
I honor your attempt to get better without the meds.I think for many(not all
perhaps) it is a very valid position.
Good Luck.
Sue
JULIE SEICHEPINE
Perhaps the anti-psychotic helped your thinking abilitys and now that you
are not taking it you've gone back to the way you were before. I've been
taking seroquel for 9 months for psychotic depression and it has helped with
my moods and with clearing my head. Julie
<jackf...@my-deja.com> wrote in message
news:8r5cst$816$1...@nnrp1.deja.com...
> I realize others have written some posts on this earlier, but I wanted
> to add my own experience to this. I was diagnosed with bipolar
> disorder, and given lithium, and Risperdal, in the hospital. I left
> the hospital after 19 days, and then tried to quit the drugs cold-
> turkey. I was unable to do so. In trying to do so, I found that I
> could not sleep, that I had tremendous difficulty being still, that
> after two days, I started having pain all over.
>
> I went to the ER of a hospital, was given Zyprexa, and took it for two
> nights. Then I was back on the lithium and the Risperdal. I
> voluntarily went back to the hospital again because I felt incredibly
> weak after that, and stayed there for 4 days, on lithium and Zyprexa.
> I left and tried to get off of that again, only this time, gradually.
> I couldn't, because of the pain that came after I hit 300 mg of
> lithium, and then went into a depression. I finally got off, and then
> started using Depakote. I was given Seroquel once, and then stopped it
> because it completely rigidified my thinking. I later took some
> Wellbutrin, but stopped that because it gave me dry mouth and didn't
> seem to help. I was then given Zyprexa again, to counter delusional
> thinking on my part while depressed. I don't believe it was delusional-
> -just extremely guilt-ridden, and anxiety ridden.
>
> One more trip to the hospital, for 4 days, because the pdoc thought it
> was a good idea, and then Zyprexa on and off because I it screwed up my
> thinking ability and I wanted to be able to think. I finally stopped
> still can't think clearly. It's as if a part of my brain has been shut
> down. I wonder if this is permanent, or if it'll pass with time, or if
> there's anything that can be done about it.
>
>
>
> --
> Jack
Kimbo
before they got me on it. I hated risperdal, had a very difficult time with
it. It made me feel more psychotic than I kind-of was already and almost
thought I was hearing voices on it, where my psychosis doesn't manifest that
way. My current anti-psychotic is chlorapromazine, (largactil)...it works
for me. Barely use it, when I do it's 25 mg. And it's a sleeper, a calmer,
but I am used to it, I can still think on it, just slows me down, numbs me a
little but enough so I can still go to my job and do what I have to do in a
day or a week.
I have stopped cold turkey my meds also, tegretol 600 mg/day, by stopping
cold turkey I was having convulsion like symptoms, felt very real. I was
off meds for 2 months and went into a psychotic high (my usual deteriation),
and was back on meds after a hospital stay. I don't recomend going off meds
from my very experience, and if so see a doctor to help you through the
insane decision you'd be making.
Meds help bipolar disorder. Like diabetes, heart conditions, and by taking
them everyday they help you to survive nearly, why not be on them. Seems
like a questionable decision to me. The key is finding the right mix that
helps you. Finding the right pdoc that you trust. And one who listens to
your symptoms and works hard in this nearly 21st century to help you in your
quest for a better life.
Maybe the rigified thinking is not caused by the medication. I can't take
lithium, alergic, I take tegretol, have been on hell-dol, depatoke, epival,
paxil, prozac. Can't take the anti-depressants, too sensitive, and can
cause a high. So I find ways of coping, changing my thought patterns over
time, changing my life outlook over time, working on a positive attitude
over time, and staying on the tegretol for a relative amount of balance.
And keeping my life decisions down to par--keeping them low key, so that I
don't do something that can jeapordize my balance yet still doing what gives
me pleasure in life.
Rigified thinking can be caused by the depression. After a mania you will
experience a depression in direct proportion to the initial mania, it's
worth keeping into consideration. Patience, time and healing, as you find
what it is that makes your life better for yourself. Understanding
depression and realizing that the lowest you are you will come back,
believing it or not, it is a phase and what you want is to get back to an
even keel.
Good luck to you.
~~~Kim
<jackf...@my-deja.com> wrote in message
news:8r5cst$816$1...@nnrp1.deja.com...
> I realize others have written some posts on this earlier, but I wanted
> to add my own experience to this. <<snipped>>
flight ofthe phoenix
LostboyinNC <lostb...@my-deja.com> wrote in message
news:8r5kvh$dvn$1...@nnrp1.deja.com...
> Excuses, excuses Jack. Jack, if you are a manic depressive PLEASE go
> back on your meds soon before you end up dead or in prison.
Pigfucker! :)
YOU are _hardly_ an example of how wonderful meds are...
Years and years eh? ;)
As for "prison"? Who got busted for being on meds and drunk & stupid, eh? ;)
Go have the SSRI drug addict and woman "breeder" basher,
pusher-of-drugs-to-pregnant-women Norweigian homosexual
"examine" your dick on Usenet again!
You _both_ liked it, didn't you? ;)
Be sure to give OTHERS lots and lots of your "wisdom"...
Btw, when was the last time your tobacco farmer "daddy" had sex with you?
AC
>
> Eric
> --
> "Well I fucked a sheep, I fucked a goat, I ran my
> cock right down its throat" Metallica "So fucking What?
>
>
> Steroids caused my depression...prednisone should be used conservatively
>
>
>
flight ofthe phoenix
JULIE SEICHEPINE <cavef...@prodigy.net> wrote in message
news:8r7gug$5a1i$1...@newssvr05-en0.news.prodigy.com...
>
> Perhaps the anti-psychotic helped your thinking abilitys and now that you
> are not taking it you've gone back to the way you were before. I've been
> taking seroquel for 9 months for psychotic depression and it has helped
with
> my moods and with clearing my head. Julie
> news:8r5cst$816$1...@nnrp1.deja.com...
> > I realize others have written some posts on this earlier, but I wanted
flight ofthe phoenix
JULIE SEICHEPINE <cavef...@prodigy.net> wrote in message
news:8r7gug$5a1i$1...@newssvr05-en0.news.prodigy.com...
>
> Perhaps the anti-psychotic helped your thinking abilitys
No.
It seems to be a description of the drug effect and it effects afterwards
upon cessation.
Not enough data here, but DRUGS do not "help" in one's "thinking abilities".
See what they've done for you Julie? ;)
AC
jackf...@my-deja.com
wrote:
>
> JULIE SEICHEPINE <cavef...@prodigy.net> wrote in message
> news:8r7gug$5a1i$1...@newssvr05-en0.news.prodigy.com...
> >
> > Perhaps the anti-psychotic helped your thinking abilitys
>
> No.
> It seems to be a description of the drug effect and it effects
afterwards
> upon cessation.
>
> Not enough data here, but DRUGS do not "help" in one's "thinking
abilities".
No. They don't. They mess it up big time. And hopefully, not
permanently. But they do mess it up. They make it hard to think
clearly. And to remember clearly. And to be as sensitive to people as
before. It really is a way to suppress part of your brain. I do not
care to live like this. So, I'm looking for a solution.
To those who might wonder: no, it isn't the bipolar disorder that's
causing this. Neither mania nor depression, as far as I know, leave
you unable to think clearly after they're over.
As for whether it's worth it to achieve balance, the mood stabilizers
might be, but not the antipsychotics, not if they cause permanent
damage, and leave you less able to think, and less able to remember,
and less able in general.
lord_terabyte_and_th...@cox-internet.com
>"flight ofthe phoenix" <theyclogmyboxwith@ViolentProzakianDrugRage>
>wrote:
>>
>> JULIE SEICHEPINE <cavef...@prodigy.net> wrote in message
>> news:8r7gug$5a1i$1...@newssvr05-en0.news.prodigy.com...
>> >
>> > Perhaps the anti-psychotic helped your thinking abilitys
>>
>> No.
>> It seems to be a description of the drug effect and it effects
>afterwards
>> upon cessation.
>>
>> Not enough data here, but DRUGS do not "help" in one's "thinking
>abilities".
>
>No. They don't. They mess it up big time. And hopefully, not
>permanently. But they do mess it up. They make it hard to think
>clearly. And to remember clearly. And to be as sensitive to people as
>before. It really is a way to suppress part of your brain. I do not
>care to live like this. So, I'm looking for a solution.
Why don't you just join the church of scientology? They'll put you to
work on one of their slave ships and your problems will be solved.
>
>To those who might wonder: no, it isn't the bipolar disorder that's
>causing this. Neither mania nor depression, as far as I know, leave
>you unable to think clearly after they're over.
You don't know, that's the problem, and you refuse to listen to anyone
who does know. Not only are you bipolar, but you also have a
personality disorder. Your mind is totally made up...you are not
willing to learn from people who are better informed...why do you
bother to post here? You would be a lot happier on
alt.flame.psychiatry with other misfits like yourself.
RamSpeed2
I am so glad that your in so much pain Andrew.
hahahahahahahha
Hurt....HURT!!!
Its gives me JOY!! LOLOLOL
Andrew, we having fun yet?
I sure am!
ASDM Owner
[Comprehensive Textbook of Psychiatry/V -- Kaplan and Sadock]
>Your story doesnt indicate you attempted the lithium alone, and that is not
>an anti-psychotic.
Viscount
jackf...@my-deja.com
> Jack,
> Although I do not know your particular situation I agree with you
that these
> drugs can do more harm than good for some people.In addition,I think
one can
> get into an endless cycle of drug taking trying to cover up side
effects.For
> myself I believe I probably have latent bi-polar chemistry that
becomes exposed
> by these psychoactive drugs.This is particularly true when I attempt
to
> withdraw from them.I will never stop trying because I know my own
system will
> work better without the meds.I am not prone to wild mood swings and
nobody who
> has ever lived with me thinks it is possible that I am bi-
polar.However,I
> suspect it may be true given some of the reactions I have had on
these types of
> medications.
> If you know it is true for you that these drugs cause you more harm
than good
> stick to your truth.
I will. If you are having difficulties withdrawing from medications,
try reading Dr. Peter Breggin's "Your drug may be your problem: How and
why to stop taking psychiatric medications". I wish I'd had it when I
first tried to get off of lithium.
I never asked to be given the medications. It was forced on me. I was
forced into a psychiatric hospital, and given very little choice in the
matter. I chose to take the medications in order to get out of the
hospital as soon as possible, thinking that I could simply quit when I
got out.
I found out that I couldn't quit, and that when I tried, I was in
tremendous pain, and couldn't sleep, and couldn't be still without
tremendous effort. It was a combination of lithium, Risperdal, and
Ativan. I then went to their ER, and asked for help, and they gave me
Zyprexa to sleep!
At this point, I decided to take the medications they'd prescribed for
me, lithium, and Risperdal. I went back voluntarily into the hospital
because I felt so weak and unable to exist in the outside world. I
stayed for a few days, and got out, and tried to quit again. This time
gradually.
I still was unable to quit. The pain came back. Note: none of this
was what I wanted in the first place. It was all forced upon me. I
never wanted to be stuck in the hospital and I never wanted to take the
medications. I would infinitely rather have just had the manic episode
pass, and possibly have had some help from a psychotherapist.
After trying to quit and failing, I fell into a major, clinical
depression, the first in my entire life. I do not believe this would
have happened had I not been forced onto the meds. I was in despair
and did not believe I could ever get off the meds. As a result I was
finally able to get off the meds, but now I was clinically depressed!
I went back to a different psychiatrist, and was given different drugs--
Depakote and Seroquel.
I stopped the Seroquel immediately. It froze my mind and my thinking.
The Depakote I kept taking for the next two and a half months. It
didn't seem to affect my thinking, but it certainly cut down on my
emotions.
I had a period of tremendous fear in July, and spoke to my psychiatrist
about it and was given Zyprexa. I took it. It didn't do any good in
terms of changing my mind about what I was afraid of. "Any progress
you've made was because you were on the Zyprexa or other antipsychotics
at the time." It did stop me from being able to think clearly.
I decided to stop taking the Zyprexa. The psychiatrist
insisted. I took it, and then stopped again. I like being able to
think. "Have you thought that maybe I don't want to you to be able to
think so deeply?" So I took it again. And again I stopped.
Note: at this time, I was in tremendous fear. I thought "What if the
events of the last few months were somehow the result of Destiny
punishing me for failing some test? What if by doing something wrong
while I was manic, I failed some test? What if Destiny is now trying
to punish me and is pushing me towards suicide? A choice between jail
and suicide? I'm involved in a law case. What if Destiny somehow
forces me to call this person who I've got an order of protection
against, and I get sent to jail where all sorts of awful things will
happen? What if I basically have a choice between suicide and jail,
where all sorts of awful things will happen?"
So he gave me Zyprexa. I got off of it, but he insisted. Note: being
depressed means that it's hard to be decisive. He then wanted me to go
into the hospital, after I had cleared up my fears, just in case. I
chose to trust him, and did it. More Depakote and Zyprexa.
I got out, and finally decided to get off of the stuff altogether. I
did. I was unable to think for a while.
This was August.
It's now October. I still can't think as deeply as I once did. I am
scared as hell--what if I go crazy? And I'm wondering if any permanent
damage resulted from the medications. "You're unusually sensitive to
the medications." I hope not. It would be awful to go through life
like this.
Know one can really tell but you.Try to be as honest about
> it as you can.
> I honor your attempt to get better without the meds.I think for many
(not all
> perhaps) it is a very valid position.
> Good Luck.
> Sue
Take care,
jackf...@my-deja.com
> Jack, if you are having real problems with the anti=psychotics why
not stick
> with the tried and true treatment for BP, the lithium only, or
current ones,
> the anti-convulsant doubled for use as mood stabilizers like the
depakote.
> Your story doesnt indicate you attempted the lithium alone, and that
is not
> an anti-psychotic.
>
used to
> treat depression et al. But, can't absolute positively say without
doubt the
> AD's did it. I took them while leading a very stressful life lots of
> responsibility often overwhelming, plus getting older. I don't
think my
> faculties should be degenerating so fast so soon, so much and all, at
44 ,
> but I think its a combo of reasons causing thinking problems
including all
> those meds, but not solely because of them.
>
> Good NG named something like alt support, depression, manic, or
something to
> that effect might want to check out too.
>
> Linda
>
Thanks, Linda. Take care of yourself, too.
flight ofthe phoenix
<jackf...@my-deja.com> wrote in message
news:8rl81o$mpv$1...@nnrp1.deja.com...
> moons...@aol.com (Moonstone29) wrote most LOGICALLY :
> > Jack,
> > Although I do not know your particular situation I agree with you
> that these
> > drugs can do more harm than good for some people.I n addition,I think
> one can
> > get into an endless cycle of drug taking trying to cover up side
> effects.
Yes indeed... seeking a "magic cure"...
For
> > myself I believe I probably have latent bi-polar chemistry that
> becomes exposed
> > by these psychoactive drugs.This is particularly true when I attempt
> to
> > withdraw from them.I will never stop trying because I know my own
> system will
> > work better without the meds.I am not prone to wild mood swings and
> nobody who
> > has ever lived with me thinks it is possible that I am bi-
> polar.
Maybe, maybe not... maybe drug induced as well...
> However,I
> > suspect it may be true given some of the reactions I have had on
> these types of
> > medications.
> > If you know it is true for you that these drugs cause you more harm
> than good
> > stick to your truth.
>
> I will. If you are having difficulties withdrawing from medications,
> try reading Dr. Peter Breggin's "Your drug may be your problem: How and
> why to stop taking psychiatric medications". I wish I'd had it when I
> first tried to get off of lithium.
Such info. is not as avaibable as the nice looking pamphlets put out by the
drug companys... Good TV commercials too...
Lots of addicts too....
>
> I never asked to be given the medications. It was forced on me. I was
> forced into a psychiatric hospital, and given very little choice in the
> matter.
Typical....
> I chose to take the medications in order to get out of the
> hospital as soon as possible, thinking that I could simply quit when I
> got out.
>
> I found out that I couldn't quit, and that when I tried, I was in
> tremendous pain, and couldn't sleep, and couldn't be still without
> tremendous effort. It was a combination of lithium, Risperdal, and
> Ativan. I then went to their ER, and asked for help, and they gave me
> Zyprexa to sleep!
My wife did that as well... standard.... fast... on to the next patient...
> At this point, I decided to take the medications they'd prescribed for
> me, lithium, and Risperdal. I went back voluntarily into the hospital
> because I felt so weak and unable to exist in the outside world. I
> stayed for a few days, and got out, and tried to quit again. This time
> gradually.
>
> I still was unable to quit. The pain came back. Note: none of this
> was what I wanted in the first place. It was all forced upon me.
Hospitols and physcians are busy places.... "give him/her this."
> I
> never wanted to be stuck in the hospital and I never wanted to take the
> medications. I would infinitely rather have just had the manic episode
> pass, and possibly have had some help from a psychotherapist.
But then you'd have to pay "out of pocket" chances are... drugs/therapy
combos are much more *profitable*,
_insurance justifiable_.... "quicker", "cheaper" ... or so it appears, so
it appears... besides... from an insurance company view... "it's cheaper"
(though as you know... most painfully ... it is not).
>
> After trying to quit and failing, I fell into a major, clinical
> depression, the first in my entire life. I do not believe this would
> have happened had I not been forced onto the meds.
In absence of data, hard to say... I am *inclined* to believe you. More so
given what you have presented.
> I was in despair
> and did not believe I could ever get off the meds. As a result I was
> finally able to get off the meds, but now I was clinically depressed!
Yes.
> I went back to a different psychiatrist, and was given different drugs--
> Depakote and Seroquel.
Insurance "games", rules... billing justifications for the visit... etc..
Very standard...
>
> I stopped the Seroquel immediately. It froze my mind and my thinking.
Yes.
> The Depakote I kept taking for the next two and a half months. It
> didn't seem to affect my thinking, but it certainly cut down on my
> emotions.
The "zombification" process...
a slow "pickeling" of your brain...
>
> I had a period of tremendous fear in July, and spoke to my psychiatrist
> about it and was given Zyprexa. I took it. It didn't do any good in
> terms of changing my mind about what I was afraid of.
.... and you were right, weren't you?
> "Any progress
> you've made was because you were on the Zyprexa or other antipsychotics
> at the time." It did stop me from being able to think clearly.
>
> I decided to stop taking the Zyprexa. The psychiatrist
> insisted. I took it, and then stopped again. I like being able to
> think.
Don't like being Borg-like... yeah... not good..
You were able to see that... despite the "organizations" around you... good
for you!
> "Have you thought that maybe I don't want to you to be able to
> think so deeply?" So I took it again. And again I stopped.
>
> Note: at this time, I was in tremendous fear. I thought "What if the
> events of the last few months were somehow the result of Destiny
> punishing me for failing some test?
Yeah... the feeling of "what the hell is going on here?"
> What if by doing something wrong
> while I was manic, I failed some test? What if Destiny is now trying
> to punish me and is pushing me towards suicide? A choice between jail
> and suicide? I'm involved in a law case. What if Destiny somehow
> forces me to call this person who I've got an order of protection
> against, and I get sent to jail where all sorts of awful things will
> happen? What if I basically have a choice between suicide and jail,
> where all sorts of awful things will happen?"
>
> So he gave me Zyprexa. I got off of it, but he insisted. Note: being
> depressed means that it's hard to be decisive.
YES!
BINGO!
> He then wanted me to go
> into the hospital, after I had cleared up my fears, just in case. I
> chose to trust him, and did it. More Depakote and Zyprexa.
Sure...
>
> I got out, and finally decided to get off of the stuff altogether. I
> did. I was unable to think for a while.
OF COURSE!
Forget what the drug companys say about "half life of a drug in leaving your
system"... you had many "chemical insults"
to your brain and body for God's sake!
Recovery is needed.
>
> This was August.
>
> It's now October. I still can't think as deeply as I once did. I am
> scared as hell--what if I go crazy?
Chill!
> And I'm wondering if any permanent
> damage resulted from the medications.
Give it time... eat/sleep, workout a bit... walking is greatly underated...
> "You're unusually sensitive to
> the medications." I hope not. It would be awful to go through life
> like this.
Sure... though some like it and make it a "life style" here on
alt.support.depression.medication
>
> Know one can really tell but you.Try to be as honest about
> > it as you can.
> > I honor your attempt to get better without the meds.I think for many
> (not all
> > perhaps) it is a very valid position.
> > Good Luck.
> > Sue
Good luck!
AC
>
> Take care,
>
> --
> Jack
>
jackf...@my-deja.com
> On Mon, 02 Oct 2000 16:49:01 GMT, jackf...@my-deja.com wrote:
>
> >"flight ofthe phoenix" <theyclogmyboxwith@ViolentProzakianDrugRage>
> >wrote:
> >>
> >> JULIE SEICHEPINE <cavef...@prodigy.net> wrote in message
> >> news:8r7gug$5a1i$1...@newssvr05-en0.news.prodigy.com...
> >> >
> >> > Perhaps the anti-psychotic helped your thinking abilitys
> >>
> >> No.
> >> It seems to be a description of the drug effect and it effects
> >afterwards
> >> upon cessation.
> >>
> >> Not enough data here, but DRUGS do not "help" in one's "thinking
> >abilities".
> >
> >No. They don't. They mess it up big time. And hopefully, not
> >permanently. But they do mess it up. They make it hard to think
> >clearly. And to remember clearly. And to be as sensitive to people
as
> >before. It really is a way to suppress part of your brain. I do not
> >care to live like this. So, I'm looking for a solution.
>
> Why don't you just join the church of scientology? They'll put you to
> work on one of their slave ships and your problems will be solved.
You should learn to say "fuck you" more often, especially when you have
nothing else to say.
> >
> >To those who might wonder: no, it isn't the bipolar disorder that's
> >causing this. Neither mania nor depression, as far as I know, leave
> >you unable to think clearly after they're over.
>
> You don't know, that's the problem, and you refuse to listen to anyone
> who does know. Not only are you bipolar, but you also have a
> personality disorder. Your mind is totally made up...you are not
> willing to learn from people who are better informed...why do you
> bother to post here? You would be a lot happier on
> alt.flame.psychiatry with other misfits like yourself.
Fuck you. Or: in more complicated terms, when someone goes around
diagnosing others as being personality disordered just because they
refuse to agree with them, something is seriously wrong with them.
Again, fuck you.
By the way, I post because I want to post.
> >As for whether it's worth it to achieve balance, the mood stabilizers
> >might be, but not the antipsychotics, not if they cause permanent
> >damage, and leave you less able to think, and less able to remember,
> >and less able in general.
I also see you never really responded to anything I had to say above.
Pity.
Psychiatric drugs really are fucked up. If you don't mind dumping
chemicals that are known to cause damage into your brain, then please,
go right ahead.
My experience, which is actually extremely relevant, is that they
suck. I would not wish them on anyone. They damage, or at the very
least, render dysfunctional, your brain, parts of it, and do not cure
anything.
Especially the neuroleptics. And the antidepressants. And the mood-
stabilizers.
And as for propaganda, which you mentioned in the title of another
post, what do you call the research that drug companies put out,
anyway? Hard, real science?
-flight ofthe phoenix-
AC
===================
<jackf...@my-deja.com> wrote in message
news:8sqjpa$1g4$1...@nnrp1.deja.com...
lord_terabyte_and_th...@cox-internet.com
>I say its true, these anti-depressants and mood-stabilzers got me so fucked
>its unreal.
>Zoloft being the most damaging one of them to me, which is probably #2 from
>prozac.
>My mind is dulled, and always is dulled, thats all they do is cause some
>brain damage to dull my fucking mind.
>money making "pigfuckers" living off of us..
>
> -Rob
You might enquire about Lamictal, it has an excellent side effect
profile and is a strong AD...you might be able to drop the Zoloft.
Rob
its unreal.
Zoloft being the most damaging one of them to me, which is probably #2 from
prozac.
My mind is dulled, and always is dulled, thats all they do is cause some
brain damage to dull my fucking mind.
money making "pigfuckers" living off of us..
-Rob
" -flight ofthe phoenix-" <NoDeathThreatsPlease!@BewareTheBorg.org> wrote in
message news:8sqqmi$edh$0...@dosa.alt.net...
jackf...@my-deja.com
> I say its true, these anti-depressants and mood-stabilzers got me so
fucked
> its unreal.
> Zoloft being the most damaging one of them to me, which is probably
#2 from
> prozac.
> My mind is dulled, and always is dulled, thats all they do is cause
some
> brain damage to dull my fucking mind.
> money making "pigfuckers" living off of us..
>
> -Rob
Read "Your Drug May Be Your Problem: How and why to stop taking
psychiatric medications" and "Toxic Psychiatry", both by Peter Breggin,
MD.