Crow: Guess we'll have to have her destroyed.
Mike: Off to an awfully dark start, aren't we?
Crow: Hey, I could've said we'd have to put her out to stud.
[all shudder]
> After speending two months acting like a Vulcan,
Tom: You mean wooden and showing no trace of personality? All
Ratliff's characters act like that!
> she suddenly started crying when Captain Picard complimented her
> prize winning science project.
Crow [as Marrissa]: "Daa-aa-aad! You're making me look like a geek
in front of the whole school! Now I'll never be
popular!"
> Poor Captain. He gives glowing praise to his adopted dauther
> and she breaks out in tears.
Mike: "Good job, daughter" is "glowing praise"?
Tom: Sure. Remember, we're dealing with Ratliff here. He thinks "your
latest story was marginally less mind-bogglingly awful than usual"
is a rave review.
> To make matters worse, Marrissa fell asleep while he held her on his
> lap,
Mike: Uh, boy. Ratliff once again lives out his fantasies through
ol' Jean-Luc.
> attempting to comfort her and having no idea why she was crying.
Tom: Makes sense. Humbert could never figure out why Dolly was
crying either.
> While it was obvious that the Captain cares for her, I don't think he
> ever thought that he'd have Marrissa cry herself to sleep in his lap.
Crow: Yeah, usually you'd have to pay an extra $50 for something like
that.
> Any way, Marrissa is returning to normal now.
Tom: Wiping out alien races, obsessively recounting her accomplishments,
crushing all who stand in her way...
> She's laughing at Shayna's practical jokes again,
Mike: Ha. Whoopee cushion. Fun-nee.
> and woe to the crewman whose holodeck adventure extends into her
> training time.
Crow: Just yesterday she threw a naked and disoriented Geordi LaForge
out into the hall!
> She still hesitates when mentioning someone's parents, and has a sad
> look in her eyes,
Mike: Sad, psychotic, same difference.
> but she is no longer hiding it.
> Now if I could get her to get out some more ...
Tom: Out? Out where? Into the screaming vacuum of space?
Crow: We can only hope.
> ____
> / |/ / Your Friend,
> / / _ _
> | / / | /_ / |
> \___/ /\_/\/\/ /_/\/\/
Mike: Dear Clara, Why do your letters always revolve around Marrissa?
Don't you have a life of your own? Please, don't write back
till you've gotten over this dangerous fixation. Your friend,
Isabella. PS: There's no such thing as strawberry juice.
-----
Adam Cadre, Durham, NC
http://www.duke.edu/~adamc
:
: > To make matters worse, Marrissa fell asleep while he held her on his
: > lap,
:
: Mike: Uh, boy. Ratliff once again lives out his fantasies through
: ol' Jean-Luc.
Nope, just following real life expreince again. I was an aide in 4th
grade Sunday School when an girl who shall remain nameless was told of
her mother's death, by the parish priest (Her father was in a coma)
:
: > attempting to comfort her and having no idea why she was crying.
:
: Tom: Makes sense. Humbert could never figure out why Dolly was
: crying either.
:
: > While it was obvious that the Captain cares for her, I don't think he
: > ever thought that he'd have Marrissa cry herself to sleep in his lap.
:
: Crow: Yeah, usually you'd have to pay an extra $50 for something like
: that.
Crow really should spend some time in time out.
:
: > Any way, Marrissa is returning to normal now.
:
: Tom: Wiping out alien races, obsessively recounting her accomplishments,
: crushing all who stand in her way...
:
: > She's laughing at Shayna's practical jokes again,
:
: Mike: Ha. Whoopee cushion. Fun-nee.
:
Hey, they're 12 and 10 years old ... a whoopie cushion fits with that
age. Of course that's not Shayna's only joke.
: > and woe to the crewman whose holodeck adventure extends into her
: > training time.
:
: Crow: Just yesterday she threw a naked and disoriented Geordi LaForge
: out into the hall!
ROTFL
:
: > She still hesitates when mentioning someone's parents, and has a sad
: > look in her eyes,
:
: Mike: Sad, psychotic, same difference.
:
: > but she is no longer hiding it.
: > Now if I could get her to get out some more ...
:
: Tom: Out? Out where? Into the screaming vacuum of space?
: Crow: We can only hope.
:
: > ____
: > / |/ / Your Friend,
: > / / _ _
: > | / / | /_ / |
: > \___/ /\_/\/\/ /_/\/\/
:
: Mike: Dear Clara, Why do your letters always revolve around Marrissa?
: Don't you have a life of your own? Please, don't write back
: till you've gotten over this dangerous fixation. Your friend,
: Isabella. PS: There's no such thing as strawberry juice.
:
Humm... 3 letters and you see a pattern. Well forget about it. The
next one is about Alexander.
Stephen
--
Stephen Ratliff CS Major, Radford University.
srat...@runet.edu Radford, Virginia 24142-7496
rec.arts.tv.mst3k.misc's polite target. Marrissa Stories Author
http://www.cs.runet.edu/~sratliff/
FAQ Maintainer for alt.startrek.creative FAQs/
Index Maintainer as well index/
http://aviary.share.net/~alara/
ASC Awards run from 2/02/97 to 3/19/97 see alt.startrek.creative for
details.
"I assure you that at the first sign of betrayal, I will kill him
(Garak). But I promise to bring the body back intact."
"I assume that's a joke."
"We'll see."
-Worf and Sisko, DS9's "In Purgatory's Shadow"