Weird aliens and sex in Trek fan fiction
ska...@globalnet.co.uk
If you want weird aliens, just try reading all those NC-17 stories.
Full of beautiful, honorable, upright (both senses), sensitive people
who can perform multiple times with multiple partners, with
imagination, patience, tenderness and no social diseases... Are we
talking aliens here or aren't we?
I agree, some unromantic stories with interesting, challenging aliens
would be great. But Star Trek has never been good at this. All its
favourite aliens are humans with bits missing or bits added. It
occasionally tries to do something weirder, but the insect races, the
gorn, even the Borg... We don't really get to find out much about
them. Unless they turn into comic strip fantasies, like the Borg Queen
in First Contact. Look at Darmok. Brave try, but almost by definition,
this NG episode built a brick wall and proceeded to bang its head
against it for the next 45 minutes. The race in question was never
seen again. Probably couldn't figure out the manual when their warp
drive malfunctioned...
When I was an adolescent, and probably should have been sneaking
around reading pornography, I was reading Heinlein (who wasn't so
pornographic back then), Asimov, Blish... Lots of hard tech SF. Now
I'm a middle aged woman, who wouldn't touch a 'romance' novel if it
was the last paperback in the airport, I'm enjoying Treksmut.
And it makes sense. What can be more 'alien' for Tom Paris than having
to acknowledge he's in love with Chakotay? Or Kim? Or even Janeway?
Even if it's 'normal' for the 24th century, it isn't here, yet. And
here, now is where these readers and writers are.
And when I write my own Trek fiction... well, at the moment I'm
working on something that transfers tribal sexual customs from New
Guinea to a newly discovered society. Captain Kirk is finding these
people pretty weirdly alien, thanks.
Jane
'Does it worry you that your youth is slipping away?'
'No, he's not. I've locked him in his bedroom.'
John Lyttle
Macedon
ska...@globalnet.co.uk wrote:
> And when I write my own Trek fiction... well, at the moment I'm
> working on something that transfers tribal sexual customs from New
> Guinea to a newly discovered society. Captain Kirk is finding these
> people pretty weirdly alien, thanks.
<Knowing a bit about New Guinea tribal sexual customs....>
This could be...er...*interesting*. (And I mean that in a good way.)
I'll be interested to see it when it's done. Got a title yet?
Now, taking a minute to brag on my writing partner...I think Peg has
done a really fine job inventing customs both for her Kithtri and for
the new aliens in the next link in our series. So I'd like to salute my
partner for the aliens she's created. (And also to say that, if folks
want "weird aliens" and lotsa action, as well as some, er, *unusual*
mating patterns...just wait till you see the next [and last] link in our
story chain! Yeah, yeah, yeah...we're working on it. Really.)
Macedon
Pegeel
Macedon says:
>>Now, taking a minute to brag on my writing partner...I think Peg has
done a really fine job inventing customs both for her Kithtri and for
the new aliens in the next link in our series.>>
Aw, you smooth talkin', silver -tongued Classical-Historical-Miami-He-Man,
you! Shucks, 'twarn't nuthin'. Just something I whipped up on a whim out
of a few old flour sacks and a couple of plastic roses I swiped off the
church altar. A mere bagatelle... <BG> (Thanks, partner... It's nice to
get bopped with a compliment out of the blue once in a while.)
More seriously, I'm kind of frustrated with the PTB's efforts at aliens.
(RANT WARNING: the below got out of hand, I'm afraid. Chalk it up to the
hour -- I should never post so late at night...)
I can deal with the fact that there just isn't the time or money to build
or animate or otherwise create the illusion of very kinky biological
specimens very often -- I'm too much of a theater pragmatist to be
disgruntled by practical realities of the sort that make Trek aliens
generally *look* human. I can even deal with the fact that they more or
less behave in "human" ways -- if they're too alien they would make good
study projects, but less good theater. But...
I want aliens to *feel* alien. To have enough really unexpected kinks in
their behavior and motivations to keep me on my toes. I want them to have
a little stardust-elfhame glamourie and funky unpredictablilty to enchant
me, baffle me, and intrigue me. And DAMN but I'd like it if it wasn't all
forehead ridges, bad wigs, and spots. Color -- what about color? There
are some spectacular colors even among primates, and if you count in
birds, and reptiles, and amphibians, jeez! Why did they make Cardassians,
and Kazon, and Vi'idians pretty much everyone who isn't Anglo human pink
or "person of color" brown all shades of grey-brown-green swamp man tones?
How about some vermillion? Electric blue? Rose madder, burnt umber,
chrome yellow, cinnabar red? What about feathers? Fur? Spines and
gem-glitter scales? There has to be some other cheap but interesting way
to make a character visually read as "alien" besides making him/her grey
with a bad hair style and some dapples and forehead ridges and funky ears.
In fact, drat it,there *are* other ways -- I've spent a number of
recreational hours in makeup rooms designing such things just for fun. In
any case I'd like to see a bit more creativity and playfullness expended
on the "aliens" of Trek.
Of course, I'd also like it if they stopped painting all Trek sets in dawn
greys, creams, and dusty mauves. And I've bloody well had it with the
parade of uniformly tasteful and discrete lighting setups. Sometimes I
*yearn* to see that some other species shares with us the shame of
inventing the disco sparkle ball, or the lava lamp. Or that my distant
descendants inherit my lack of taste in curtains -- or my good taste in
eschewing miles of monochromatic pastel wall-to-wall carpeting, and prefer
something like tile, or hardwood floors, or even, so help me, cheesy
linoleum. I'd like it if the PTB stopped making all the flower
arrangements up as pseudo-modern-oriental stuff that you could get at any
florist's for fifteen bucks, complete with a writhing grape vine arching
into the air, stopped making all the statuary be abstract modernist
packing materials, and allowed the characters to like some form of art
besides restrained brush abstracts, mechanistic abstracts, vaguely
macrame-style abstracts, or abstract-modernist splash painting. In fact,
sometimes I think if I see one more abstract-minimalist anything on Trek
I'll scream-- it's cheap, it's easy, and it's dull as hell. The occasional
Cellini, or Tiffany, or Turner would be a treat. What about the Vulcan
version of a Norman Rockwell: good, homey Surakian values, and melded
togetherness? <BG> A vigorous Romulan "Van Gogh" or two, or a Betazoid
"Titian" would be a nice change of pace. Or a Bajoran Bar-room nude
--male of course, given the assertiveness of Bajoran females. Or a
Ferengi Michaelangelo. That would be nifty. Just some indication that the
entire universe wasn't taken over by the abstract-art-Borg-hive. But
there it is -- conformity and a unified "look" wins out over any sensible
and intriguing diversification. I mean, after all, it has to "look like
all the rest of Trek" now, doesn't it?
Doesn't it?
Hmm. My sarcasm functions seem to be overloading. Maybe I'd better have
my acid levels checked....
(wry grin) A little experience choosing just the right stuff to
indicate mood, setting, and character is a dangerous thing. Gives a
person delusions of expertise that may not be justified.... Still, I'm
awfully tired of knowing what the show is going to "look" like every week.
Sometimes I want to rename the shows "Deja View." You've seen one Trek
alien, one Trek set, one Trek art-work, and you might as well have seen
them all. Consistency is not a virtue when carried to extremes. God may
be a great graphic designer, but he's also a diverse and varied one, and
I'd like to see a bit more of that diversity while still respecting the
monetary and temporal limits of television production.
Wouldn't it be a fun treat to see a Trek alien with skin in colors like a
South American poison arrow frog? Neato-keen! Maybe they could be toxic
pacifists: completely non-agressive, but deadly if you cross 'em in spite
of it. Exuding poison into the atmosphere every time they got scared. That
would be intriguing...
Maybe I should go and invent them a bit more...
Dratted PTB just don't *play* anymore. No risks, no gambles, no courage,
and no variety. Grumble, grumble, grumble. I keep thinking of the old
story of Roddenberry turning a plant upside down so the roots stuck in the
air and insisting that *that* was an alien plant -- granted, at this point
it's been done to death, but when he did it it was new, and creative, and
playfull. Trek hasn't given us tribbles (or no "new" tribbles), or plants
that sing, or cloud cities, or green Orions, or blue Andorians, or
Tellarites that look like pigs, or hortas, or underground mining colonies,
or cheap-jack trader/con men like Harry Mudd or Cyrano Jones for a hell of
a long time now. I miss 'em. They were occasionally hokey, but they were
part of the fun and the enchantment, and the shows are poorer for their
lack.
(End Rant.)
>> So I'd like to salute my
partner for the aliens she's created. (And also to say that, if folks
want "weird aliens" and lotsa action, as well as some, er, *unusual*
mating patterns...just wait till you see the next [and last] link in our
story chain! Yeah, yeah, yeah...we're working on it.>>
(aside to readers) He's really a terrible ham, you know. And a shameless
self-promoter, when it suits him. If he didn't write so very well, and
laugh at my jokes, and send me great letters about Alexander the Great and
suchlike, and if he wasn't so cute when he gets in a tizzy and sends me
emails about football games, I'd probably...
Actually, I probably wouldn't. I like the silly man -- though the
football makes me feel great compassion for J.. She's obviously a saint
to put up with him. At least *my* husband doesn't watch football. But
still, Macedon's not half bad for a guy, and a partner..... And he is
right: we are working on it, we do have lots of funky stuff, action,
adventure, hard-times, and aliens all over the place. Trust me. Or if
you don't trust me, holler for Joan/Jaeti -- she's our official
beta-reader, and will tell you that there's a lot done, and it's still
coming. It's a big one.
Peg
Gareth Wilson
I agree, I'd like to see more aliens on the Trek showsthat don't behave
or look like Californians.
--
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Gareth Wilson
gr...@student.canterbury.ac.nz
Christchurch
New Zealand
"I take great comfort in the
injustice and cruelty of the Universe"
-Marcus, "Babylon 5"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Laura Taylor
Pegeel wrote:
<big snip>
>
> I want aliens to *feel* alien. To have enough really unexpected kinks in
> their behavior and motivations to keep me on my toes. I want them to have
> a little stardust-elfhame glamourie and funky unpredictablilty to enchant
> me, baffle me, and intrigue me. And DAMN but I'd like it if it wasn't all
> forehead ridges, bad wigs, and spots. Color -- what about color? There
> are some spectacular colors even among primates, and if you count in
> birds, and reptiles, and amphibians, jeez! Why did they make Cardassians,
> and Kazon, and Vi'idians pretty much everyone who isn't Anglo human pink
> or "person of color" brown all shades of grey-brown-green swamp man tones?
> How about some vermillion? Electric blue? Rose madder, burnt umber,
> chrome yellow, cinnabar red? What about feathers? Fur? Spines and
> gem-glitter scales? There has to be some other cheap but interesting way
> to make a character visually read as "alien" besides making him/her grey
> with a bad hair style and some dapples and forehead ridges and funky ears.
<snip>
I'd like to see Voyager visit a planet inhabited entirely by dogs.
Nothing special, just dogs. OK, OK, it's high on the cheese-factor -
and screams out for a pee-inducing parody - but it sure beats the
'humanoid alien of the week syndrome'. Just think, Chakotay would have
to communicate with them through his spirit guide, maybe a rather
amorous Lab could develop a crush on B'Elanna, the planetary security
could consist of sheepdogs and Rottweilers, the crew would have to go
around sniffing each others'...well, never mind, I'm descending into
parody territory with that one.
> Of course, I'd also like it if they stopped painting all Trek sets in dawn
> greys, creams, and dusty mauves. And I've bloody well had it with the
> parade of uniformly tasteful and discrete lighting setups. Sometimes I
> *yearn* to see that some other species shares with us the shame of
> inventing the disco sparkle ball, or the lava lamp. Or that my distant
> descendants inherit my lack of taste in curtains -- or my good taste in
> eschewing miles of monochromatic pastel wall-to-wall carpeting, and prefer
> something like tile, or hardwood floors, or even, so help me, cheesy
> linoleum.
I don't know, Neelix's kitchen seems to contain large amounts of
Formica...
I'd like it if the PTB stopped making all the flower
> arrangements up as pseudo-modern-oriental stuff that you could get at any
> florist's for fifteen bucks, complete with a writhing grape vine arching
> into the air, stopped making all the statuary be abstract modernist
> packing materials, and allowed the characters to like some form of art
> besides restrained brush abstracts, mechanistic abstracts, vaguely
> macrame-style abstracts, or abstract-modernist splash painting. In fact,
> sometimes I think if I see one more abstract-minimalist anything on Trek
> I'll scream-- it's cheap, it's easy, and it's dull as hell. The occasional
> Cellini, or Tiffany, or Turner would be a treat. What about the Vulcan
> version of a Norman Rockwell: good, homey Surakian values, and melded
> togetherness? <BG> A vigorous Romulan "Van Gogh" or two, or a Betazoid
> "Titian" would be a nice change of pace. Or a Bajoran Bar-room nude
> --male of course, given the assertiveness of Bajoran females. Or a
> Ferengi Michaelangelo. That would be nifty. Just some indication that the
> entire universe wasn't taken over by the abstract-art-Borg-hive. But
> there it is -- conformity and a unified "look" wins out over any sensible
> and intriguing diversification. I mean, after all, it has to "look like
> all the rest of Trek" now, doesn't it?
>
> Doesn't it?
I must say, Peg, I agree with you whole-heartedly...having said that,
allow me to removed my hat and reveal...augh! horns! It's the curse of
the Devil's advocate! Run away, run away! <G> But seriously, Starfleet
*is* a military organization. I don't see the Pentagon hiring Martha
Stewart anytime soon, do you? Actually, I despised the TNG sets
because they screamed 'Laura Ashley' to me. The greys of Voyager (and
First Contact) have an eerie, if dull, millenialistic (is that a
word?) feel. Quasi-apocalyptic, reminds me of some juicy passages from
the Apocrypha. On the other hand, perhaps the decor we see in Trek
*is* the antithesis of 24th century fashion. After all, what's with
that atrocious shade of yellow on engineering/science uniforms?
>
<snip>
> Wouldn't it be a fun treat to see a Trek alien with skin in colors like a
> South American poison arrow frog? Neato-keen! Maybe they could be toxic
> pacifists: completely non-agressive, but deadly if you cross 'em in spite
> of it. Exuding poison into the atmosphere every time they got scared. That
> would be intriguing...
How about an alien that functions like those frogs that ooze a
hallucinogenic substance...you know, the ones that some people lick to
get high. Paris could fall in love with one, kiss her, and freak out.
How about what I call the 'Ace Ventura' aliens? They talk through
their butts.
I'm *truly* sorry, I'm getting way too silly, not to mention sinfully
off-topic for this NG (sorry Macedon!). I can't write parodies, so if
anyone wants my way-out-there alien suggestions for a story, help
yourself!
<snip>
> >> So I'd like to salute my
> partner for the aliens she's created. (And also to say that, if folks
> want "weird aliens" and lotsa action, as well as some, er, *unusual*
> mating patterns...just wait till you see the next [and last] link in our
> story chain! Yeah, yeah, yeah...we're working on it.>>
>
> (aside to readers) He's really a terrible ham, you know. And a shameless
> self-promoter, when it suits him. If he didn't write so very well, and
> laugh at my jokes, and send me great letters about Alexander the Great and
> suchlike, and if he wasn't so cute when he gets in a tizzy and sends me
> emails about football games, I'd probably...
>
> Actually, I probably wouldn't. I like the silly man -- though the
> football makes me feel great compassion for J.. She's obviously a saint
> to put up with him. At least *my* husband doesn't watch football. But
> still, Macedon's not half bad for a guy, and a partner..... And he is
> right: we are working on it, we do have lots of funky stuff, action,
> adventure, hard-times, and aliens all over the place. Trust me. Or if
> you don't trust me, holler for Joan/Jaeti -- she's our official
> beta-reader, and will tell you that there's a lot done, and it's still
> coming. It's a big one.
>
> Peg
I, for one, am waiting with bated breath. I *loved* the Kithtri (did I
spell that right?), and the descriptions of the Walled Market took me
back to a rather memorable trip to the Grand Bazaar in Istanbul. Hurry
up before I turn blue! (hey...then *I* could be a weird alien...but
then, some people think I already am one <G>)
Laura
Zepp
On 18 Apr 1997 10:39:00 GMT, Gareth Wilson
<gr...@student.canterbury.ac.nz> wrote:
>I agree, I'd like to see more aliens on the Trek showsthat don't behave
>or look like Californians.
Me three. I noticed a long time ago that damn near every set of
quarters on the Enterprise-D has the same wierd blue-purple circular
abstract wierd painting hanging in it. At least on DS9, Odo has very
wierd furniture, and Dacx has turned hers into kind of a combo
museum/curio shop. It's a refreshing change; we could do with a lot
more such things. And I want to add my voice to the cry for something
new in aliens, no more nose ridges, plasticine foreheads, spots on
humans <although one must admit, Dax IS a tasty eyeful!> Come on,
guys -- we did better'n that for Hallowe'en, back when we were all 19
year old drunk college students! <and let me tell yua, sports fans,
that's going *back* a ways!! ;-)>
Greywolf the Wanderer, Art Critic and Professional Gadfly
--borrowing Zepp's account.
--header munged to foil spambots; remove the extra "p"