NEW: TNG: Alien Attack!

[SONIC FAN]

THis is my first attempt at writing startrek so enjoy!

Star Trek The Next Generation
Alien Attack!

BY: SONIC FAN (a trekkie!)

Captains Log stardate 2427.2724
We have entered the X-Blagthirian system to investigate
for life forms. And I'll be damned if we don't find
anything.
"Attention captian we have an unnidentified ship
approaching." said ensign Zerf.
"Onscreen" Picard said
It was a flying saucer.
"It appears to be a disc shaped craft captain" data
stated
"Well duh" said Picard.
"Hail them on all frequencies" Picard said.
"Hello! This is captain picard of the USS enterprize.
Who are you?"
They responded
"WE are from the planet BRAKO and you are invading our
space! prepare to be anihilted EARTH SCUM!!"
"Uh oh it's red alert time!" Picard Shouted. "Go to
battle status now!"
Worf hit the red button. The lights and alarms went off.
WHOOP WHOOP WHOOP!
"Hey! Where's Riker?" said Picard

Meanwhile on the Holodeck

Riker and wesley were jamming with Greenday. SUDDENLY
picards head appeared out of nowhere
"Riker! Stop goofing off and get your ass on the bridge!
We're under attack!" Picard yelled
"well looks like we'll have to cut the jam session
short, let's go wesley." said Riker. They ran to the
turbolift

On Bridge
KRRAKKKKAPOOOOWWWW!!!
The enterpize was hit! Then 2 more saucers uncloaked!
"Good god!" said picard "What are we going to do???"
Data fired the torpedos, they hit one alien craft and
blew it up.
Yeahoo! said everybody
Geordi called from the warp core "Captain aliens are
beaming in! Hellp!!!"
"Oh no c'mon RIker we're being invaded." They grabbed
their laser rifles and jumped into the turbolift.

WARP CORE

Captain Picrd looked around. Aliens were everywhere.
They opened fire but thealiens responded with missle
launchers!
One alien had a gun to Geordi's head. "Move and he
dies!" said the alien
Captain Picard snuck up behind the alien and kicked it
in the head! BOOMSHAKALAKA!
Riker blased a few more aliens into goop. Then Picard
was surrounded. Riker shot the aliens and they died!

BRIDGE

"Well we took care of those bastards but what the
hell??" Picard said
Five more ships were attacking the enterprise.
"Data get us out of here! WARP 10!" picard boomed
"but sir warp 10 is not safe..." Data advised
"Shut up and warp us you bucket of bolts!" Picard
replied
Data sent the ship to warp 10 and Picard was thrown to
the back of the bridge. "WooooAAAHHH!!!" he said
"ARRRRRRGGGG!!!" Picard said as he was plastered to the
wall
"Captain we have a planet off the starboard bow!" data
said
"STTTOOOOPPP!!!!" said picard
Data stopped the ship in a sudden stop. "YAAARRRRGG!!"
said picard as he was thrown head first into the
captain's chair.
"WHere are we" said Picard
"Unknown" said data "We are 100000 light years away from
our objective point"
"Hmmm" said Riker "We must have hit a warp zone!"
"Perhaps the inhabitants of the planet know how to get
back to federation space" Troi said
"Well it's risky but it's our only hope" Picard said
"Let's get an away team together"
So they got an away team together and went to the
transporter room
"Picard, RIker, Geordi and Troi, ready to beam down?"
said the transporter guy.
"Make it so" said Picard
They beam down to the planets surface

PLANET BRUFGHT

"Ok Troi and Geordi go to that building over there Riker
and I will go to this building" Picard said
"Gotcha" said geordi "Let's go!"
Armed with laser rifles they went in their respective
directions
Picard and Riker walked into a large building with lots
of aliens.
"Activate Holodiguise" said picard
They activated the devices so they lookes like aliens

IN AN ALIEN BAR

Troi and gerdio dsguised as aliens sit at the bar
stools. An alien is wearing a commander's outfit.
"Hmmm looks like an alien commander" said Troi "I have a
plan"
"Excuse me, where is the main base" she said
"Hey baby." The alien said "I know where the base is"
"I will have sex with you if you tell me where it is"
she said
"Hubba hubba" the alien said "It's at coordinates
1332x3748 can we have sex now"
"No" troi said
"You're mean" said the alien
"Yeah" said Geordi "You're mean"
"Bite me visorhead" she replied

ALIEN MALL

Troi transmitted the coordinates to Picard but an alien
security guard heard them
"Hey those are the coordintes for the main base! Sound
the alarm!"
ATTENTION ALLL CUSTOMERS WE HAVE RED ALERT REMAIN COLM
HUMAN INVASION I REPEAT HUMAN INVASION!!!!!!!!!!
The alien zapped Riker with a phaser and his disguise
came off! Picard and riker made a run for it!
They ran down the escalator trampling and shooting
aliens. The aliens guards chasing them did the same
thing.
Riker killed several of the alien guards but more were
after them. Picard jumped through a store window to
avoid laser fire. Then he came out of the store riding a
hover jet ski.
"Jump on Riker" picard said
Riker jumped on the back of the hover jet ski and they
flew through the mall killing aliens then they crashed
and rolled into the bathroom the aliens quickly
followed. Picard and Riker hid in teh alien toilet
stalls. the aliens marched in but Riker had an idea. He
took out a hypro-grenade and put it on the high-tech
toilet. It blew up flooding the bathroom. The aliens
slipped on the water and Picard and Riker escaped out
the front doors into the parking lot. They got into a
security vehicle. Picard hotwired it using a tricorder
and they were going down an alien highway but the alien
police were after them now.
They drove to the base blasting alien cars in the way.
They made a sharp turncasing all the police to skid off
the road and fall a million feet and hit the ground BOOM
BOOM BOOM SHBOW the hovervehicles blow up!

ALIEN BASE

They drive the hover attack car through the fence and
get out. But they are surrounded by aliens with plasma
launchers. "We are trapped" said Picard

ALIEN BAR

Meanwhile Troi and Geordi are involved in a alien bar
fight. They escape out the window while the aliens blow
eachothr up. They jump in a hovercar and drive to the
base.

ALIEN BASE

"So Captain Picard soon i will destroy your human race"
said the alien leader "These ships are armed with
doomsday rays which will destroy the planet earth, and
then the federation!"
"But alas you will not see it because you are in this
stasis feild in teh ship's engine, well bye HA HA HA
HA!" the alien said
"Lkaunching ships in 10 minutes" came the voice from the
control tower.
BUT JUST THEN a hover car drives up to the base. Geordi
and Troi jump out guns a-blazin' they fight the aliens.
The leader and his crew go to see what's going on. Riker
uses a hybogrenade to escape the stasis feild!
They kill a bunch of aliens! Riker goes into a base
building and finds the warp zone control. He sets the
control to FEDeration space! Picard picks up a metal bar
and slams an alien with it KA-POK! the aliens head comes
off! Picard throws it at another alien *SPLAT* But then
a bunch of aliens with BFG 9000's are attacking the
starfleet personalle.
"RRUUUUUNNN!!!!" Picard says. They run and jump over the
fence. Picard contacts the enterprize. "Attention fire
at coordinates 1213x2321!!!!"

ENTERPRIZE

*fires torpedose at planet*

ALIEN BASE
BABABABABBAOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOMMMMMMMMMMM!!!!!! The base
explodes and picard and the gang escape just in time!
"Beam us up" Picard says

ENTERPRIZE

"We stopped the aliens but the might attack again!" said
Picard "We have to stop them"
"Captain" said Data "There is a large ship-sized tunnel
in the mine where the aliens mine crystals from the
planet's core. Perhaps we could blow up the core"
"Make it so" says Picard.
Data flys the ship straight down to the planet! It
enters the tunnel! VRRRROOOOOOMMM!!!!!!!
"We have to steer fast or we're goners!" exxclaims
RIker!" Data you steer the ship because youre an
android!"
"Affrimative" says Data "Androis are more presise than
humans in most cases" data says
"SHUTUP AND WATCH WHERE WE'RE GOING DATA!!!" picard
yels.
The enterprize has to turn quickly to make the sharp
turns. Then a huge guard robot is blocking the tunnel.
The eneterprize blows it up but EARTHQUAKE! the tunnel
is collapsing behind them!!!
"I hope there's another way out!" says Picard
The ship is going through a huge cavern but a sclactite
scrapes the saucer section
SCCCRRRAKKKKAKAAAABALAmALMAMMMM!!!!!
"Oh crap i will have to get that re painted" says Picard
The enterprize is near the core of the planet it fires
10 torpedos THE CORE IS UNSTABNLE lava flows out the
enterprize goes thorugh another tunnel data quickly
navigating they almost hit a wall! but the tunnel is
blocked the fire the lasesrs and in trhe aliens city the
huge starship comes crashing up from the middle of an
alien suburb!!!
KRAK
VRRRRBAAAANNNNNNNGGGGGGGG!!!!
BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM!!!
The planet explodes and the enterprize crew give hi-
5's.
"We have to get to the warp zone NOW!" says wesley
"Engage!!!!!" says Pricad.
WOOOOOOSH! They enter the warp zone
It's all colors but data soon says "Captain! I have lost
control of the speed! We are going warp
9....10!......11!!....12!......13....14......WARP
24!!!!"
The sudden speed makes the crew go flying
"WAAAAUUUGHHHHH" goes picard as he is thrown to the back
of the bridge and smashes though a wall. He hangs onto a
peice of metal and says "AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!"
The crew is plastered to the walls and data says "Ca-ca-
ca-caaaptain we are on a collision couse with DEEP space
NINE!!!!!"
"YYYAAAAHHHHHH!!! DATA!!! STOP THE SHIP!!!! STOOOOOP THE
SHIIIIIIIIPPP!!!!!" picard scremed.
With much superdroid effort data manages to push the
stop button on his panel
SCCCCCRRRRRRRRREEEEEEEEEEEEEEECCCCCCCHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
H!!!!
The ship stops 2 inches from deep space 9. Captain
picard goes flying to the front of the bridge
"DDAAAARRRRGGGHHHH!!!!!" he splats against the
viewscreen and slides down. *thump*
"Hello this is deep space nine what are you doing
picard"
"Oh just saving the universe as usual" he says. They all
laugh.
Captain's log stardate 2427.2725
We are having a party on deep space nine i just won 10
credits at quarks slot machines now it's time to get
drunk! as shakespeare once said "ye ale is good!"
END