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Popey  
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 More options Oct 7 2001, 9:29 pm
Newsgroups: alt.sports.soccer.everton
From: "Popey" <po...@the-kings-dock.co.uk>
Date: Mon, 8 Oct 2001 01:28:11 +0100
Local: Sun, Oct 7 2001 8:28 pm
Subject: Sunday League Footie
You Beauty!

We won 6-3 this morning.

A tough opening to our Kettering Area Division 4 season, with going out of
the cup in the first round, and three straight losses on the bounce.

We played a 4-5-1 today, the 1 being a super quick bugger - he was called
offside about ten times (some unfairly) by the line-o, bit of bias I reckon,
but he still hit 4. Good lad!

I took the left side of central defence, and would like to point out all
their goals came from the right side.

Also had to work today at McD's.  On the close (after we shut the doors to
Joe Public and finish of paperwork/cleaning etc) we did the Coca cola
challenge.  What's the Coca cola challenge, I hear you cry.  Well, I'll tell
you.

The challenge is drinking ten cups of coke in five minutes, and they're the
smallest cups we have.  You might have seen the tiny OJ cups (If you have oj
with a meal you'll get a regular size juice, well these are even smaller).
It sounds so easy, but I've only seen three or four people do it.
It's a fun thing to get new starters to do, because it sounds so easy.

Equipment:
1 x Stopwatch
10 x cups of coke
1 x bucket, for vomming
1 x gullible employee
5 mins of your time.

This is how it works:

Cup 1 - easy, down in a few seconds.  Burp
Cup 2 - too quick, and that cold drink headache grinds your skull,  buurp
Cup 3 - half way, buuurp, finish off, buuuurp
Cup 4 - aforementioned employee starts to visibly shake as the caffeine
takes hold, buuuuurp, burp, buuurp.
Buurp
Cup 5 - As the colour starts to drain from the face, the eyes start to
water.  More shaking and burping.  I shit you not, this is very entertaining
to watch.
Cup 6 - (as far as I ever got, and I felt baaad).  The burping is less
noisy, because said employee is holding the coke-puke down, and having to
concentrate on doing so.  It's not so much downing cups, as sipping at this
point.
Cup 7 - the bucket has been called for, and is positioned as close as
possible.  We also make sure there is a clear run to the toilet...
Buuuuuuurp, hard to hold that one back.  Employee starting to spill drops of
coke, and is now whiter than a white cat sleeping in snow. burp, spit, spit,
burp.
Cup 8 - The feeling that this was a bad idea popped into the head after
four, once six was passed you just knew you would not be able to do it.
Everyone else is pissing themselves by now, because that poor sod is looking
very ill indeed.  For some reason, if you make it past six, you know you
have to gun for all ten.  You struggle to even focus, although you manage to
drink while holding the bucket under your head.  The burping stops, because
at this stage, burp=vom.  No two ways about it.
Cup 9 - The killer cup.  If you finish this one, you're home and dry.  Few
finish this one, but it's too late to just stop, the damage is done.  The
bucket is normally put under the head as crewmember slumps to floor, in a
shaking, cold sweat kind of a way.  The caffiene owns you tonight.
Cup 10 - Respect and adulation from the crowd!  You have joined an exclusive
club.  You feel wide awake, although your eyes would suggest otherwise, your
skin looks is whiter that a Scotsmans in winter, and we don't give them
anything breakable because the hands don't seem to grip anymore.  Employee
won't be late for work/school tomorrow, because they will still be awake and
buzzing.

Tomorrow night, I'm gonna get Jason to try it - he's thick as pigshit.  I
might even take my camera.

Night all

Popey
...ps, sorry if you read this waiting for a punchline, there isnt one.  I
can't describe how funny this is, so just take my word for it...


 
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Blue Dave  
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 More options Oct 8 2001, 9:00 am
Newsgroups: alt.sports.soccer.everton
From: Blue Dave <blued...@the-kings-dock.co.uk>
Date: Mon, 8 Oct 2001 13:59:18 +0100
Local: Mon, Oct 8 2001 8:59 am
Subject: Re: Sunday League Footie

Popey wrote:
> You Beauty!

> We won 6-3 this morning.

<Major snippage> sorry bud!

Well done mate!

--

Dave

I'm a man of flesh and bone,
Rapture rushing through my veins,
Passion flaming in my heart,
Heavenly surrender once again.


 
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Popey  
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 More options Oct 8 2001, 9:47 am
Newsgroups: alt.sports.soccer.everton
From: "Popey" <po...@the-kings-dock.co.uk>
Date: Mon, 8 Oct 2001 13:45:25 +0100
Local: Mon, Oct 8 2001 8:45 am
Subject: Re: Sunday League Footie

"Blue Dave" <blued...@the-kings-dock.co.uk> wrote in message

news:MPG.162bb380347cb760989913@News.CIS.DFN.DE...

> Popey wrote:

> > You Beauty!

> > We won 6-3 this morning.

> <Major snippage> sorry bud!

Nah, I deserved it.  I was running on caffeine...

Popey


 
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