Soylent Pink...

[Miss Sakamoto]

SPAM Haiku: Cannibalism

SHAM-6.
World runs out of food
Except SPAM and dead people.
Soylent Green stocks rise.

10.
If the "Alive" guys
Had some SPAM on board the plane,
What would they eat first?
--Alec Proudfoot, al...@netcom.com

42.
The pink SPAM glistens
On a blue plate of plastic.
O my Soylent Green.
--J. Allen Schones, j...@ocncra.att.com

94.
Charlton Heston cries,
In science fiction epic:
"It's made of people!"
--Norm Lunde, no...@boxhill.com

256.
Took the SPAM plant tour.
A cause for fear and concern:
WORKERS MISSING LIMBS!!!
--Bill T. Cat

318.
Burnt or buried dear?
We had him spammed just like Dad
Can I have a slice?
--Richard Cutting, cut...@cmc.cz

464.
The small tab broken:
SPAM trapped inside forever!
Cannibalism?
--Dave "spam" Krider,
http://www.cco.caltech.edu/~ekrider/FunEMail/funemail.html

518.
Both Mrs. Lovett
and Sweeny Todd would approve
serving people SPAM.
--John St. Croix, jstc...@hr.house.gov

633.
Three men in lifeboat.
No food 'cept SPAM. Hour later:
Two men in lifeboat.
--Chris Fishel, ct...@virginia.edu

684.
Abortionist's trash
Contains grisly organs, meat.
SPAM for lunch again.
--Martin H. Booda, bo...@datasync.com

687.
Chinese say no more
Than two kids, then abortion.
SPAM supply maintained.
--Martin H. Booda, bo...@datasync.com

881.
Where's Jimmy Hoffa?
Buy a can of SPAM, my friend--
Corpus delicti.
--jpol...@rdc.noaa.gov

939.
I sometimes wonder
if what Dahmer left in fridge
was shipped to Hormel
--Jonathan Black, dama...@siu.edu

942.
Conspiracies fly...
But Hoffa passed through my in-
testines. DEATH BY SPAM!!!
--Jonathan Black, dama...@siu.edu

1048.
My penis fell off
today. Leprosy. Donate
my ding-dong to SPAM.
--Jonathan Black, dama...@siu.edu

1148.
The world now-a-days
Is overpopulated.
Oh God, soylent SPAM!
--Kenji Spielman

1570.
SPAM is an offah
To lose your appetite, but
Find Jimmy Hoffa.
--Peter Yannone

1673.
Hormel Orphanage:
Many unwanted babies
Welcome; none come out.
--Martin Booda, bo...@datasync.com

1816.
"The pork is unclean!"
Rallying cry overheard.
Speakers now in tins.
--Mike McGaff

1965.
Then, again, what if
The first two letters of SPAM
Stand for "Soylent Pink"?
--Greg O'Rear, jgo.s...@mhs.unc.edu

2203.
Future nourishment
after all plant life is gone,
"Pass the Soylent Pink."
--Holly Jenson, h...@rosenet.net

2211.
Fifth "SPAM is Soylent
Green" joke spotted. We need a
moratorium.
--Chris "Grumpy Old Man" Fishel, ct...@virginia.edu

2225.
you will eat my pig
eat him! he is processed meat
where is my finger?
--Anonymous

2251.
Ate a can of SPAM
right before I went to bed.
Donner party dreams.
--Bob Roberds, brob...@ix.netcom.com

2308.
Yeah, yeah, SPAM is great.
Yeah, yeah, SPAM is good. What if
SPAM was one of us?
--Bob Roberds, brob...@ix.netcom.com

2371.
Star Trek: TNG.
Where'd Dr. Pulaski go?
Look in the blue can.
--Bob Roberds, brob...@ix.netcom.com

2374.
I cut off a chunk,
then I saw it wasn't SPAM,
but...A HUMAN HEAD!!!
--Bob Roberds, brob...@ix.netcom.com

2441.
Last night the SPAM-man
Came and stole my sleeping brain.
Boing! There is no pain.
--Mike O'Connor (K.M.O'Connor), mic...@intonet.co.uk

2442.
At the Charnel Grot,
Mad Hormel stirs his pot. My
Brain floats to the top.
--Mike O'Connor (K.M.O'Connor), mic...@intonet.co.uk

2527.
Gelatinous host,
When right-wing talk shows fade out,
Rush him into SPAM.
--Dave Silverman, na...@psu.edu

2672.
I eat the pink pork
like so many M & Ms.
MMMMM good, like my mom.
--Anonymous

2822.
Historical fact:
The Donner party carried
lots and lots of SPAM.
--zba...@cjnetworks.com

3363.
Cannibalism
jokes are pretty easy to
make about this stuff.
--Bob Roberds, brob...@ix.netcom.com

3554.
A dog walks the street.
Sniffs an empty can of SPAM
and wonders. Humans...
--Steve Sapovits, ste...@telebase.com

3831.
What does a rat call
Another rat who eats SPAM?
"Cannibalistic."
--j...@altagroup.com

--
"No more bittersweet loving..." -- Deee-Lite, "Bittersweet Loving" from
_Dewdrops in the Garden_
The Flat Earth Society http://www.tdolby.com/
And recently announced! Hyperactiv8! at America Online! Keyword: HYPR