ASSC: Detroit - The Good, The Bad, & the Ugly
idleeric
& still lighting votive candles in memory of the Bad Days, plaid skirts,
Beth, & the GOS Midwest Branch .... & looking to lap a Kosovar dancer in
2001 in some yet upopened club on John R in Hamtramck.
The Bad: Trumpp's on 8 Mile Rd. btwn Telegraph & the Southfield Freeway ...
Trumpps, home of the Gucci loafer'd, Havana cigared, 350 lb.Teamers Local
#666 Business Mgr., flashing Franklins in a silver clip while chowing on
pussy & a Super Trumppsburger .... Trumpps SRO .... Trumpps w/ "D"cupp'd 42"
sillyconed blonde bimbos from Orlando FL .... Trumpps w/ the tuxedo'd
Mensroom attendant *and* the sambo shoeshine boy spitpolishing the pimpboots
of a brillantine'd AlSharpwannabe Wayne Co. Circ judge .... that Was
Trumpp's Then ....
Trumpp's now is sad & bad .... @ 3 pm on a weds, there are a dozen dancers
listlessly rotating 2 at a time btwn the polarity of the oval center stage
.... there are an equal # of Homies & a scattering of forlorn ghostly
Regularsuits ... the girls rate Eight Up ... still tied w/ The Daytime
Landing Strip in that dept., & miraculously, there are a few recognized
holdovers from pre March 1996 inc a Patti McGuire (mid 70s PMOY) lookalike
w/ spectacular AllNaturals & a Sweet Undamaged Attitude .... i'm attired in
KMart $6.99 loafers, grey BUM lapshorts, Greenplaid shortsleeve buttondown &
LandsEnd Teal&Pink windbreaker ... i seat myself stageside, order a Molson's
Ice & Trumppburger (w/ Fries, which I feed as tips) .... I observe that the
ironspiral Catwalk Upstairs is in Operation (my last annual pilgrimage ..
April 98 ... it was firmly Fermee) .... i take a catwalk census ... a blonde
in a flowing white peignoir leads the Pack ... after nearly an hour
remaining Unhustled while Patticlone services her ghostly Regular crew, i
expectantly observe that peignoir mount the stage & learn from the taciturn
DJ that the attached Stagename is ... "MARQEE" ... sure nuff, when she
leaves the stage, she makes a Beeline a Moi!!!
Truth In Lapping Mileage Report: Better than Incidental Contact ...
vigorous handchecking (waistdown) .... not bad .... but Bad, relatively
speaking .... time to leave.
I drive down 8 mile road heading East & observe that the W clubcluster
(Livernois area) has had some facelifts & a multitude of namechanges ... the
infamously Lame Body Rocks is History, Allah Be Blest! The stalwart
Warrenbound ethnic East duo, Tycoons & Players, are still Hanging In There.
The Ugly: The TrafficLight ...one mile n of Mount Clemens, off Gratiot, on
Joy Blvd. this one has got to take 1st prize as the ugliest club bldg
outside the Sunbelt ... a squat square cinderblock hall surrounded by a vast
asphalt lot in a swampy industrial wasteland. I've driven by it heading s on
I-94 hundreds of times in the past decade w/o the slightest desire to
investigate. It was shutdown, boarded up for yrs. during the Wayne Co.
mid-90s Glory Days & reopened only a few yrs back. WTF, the 5 pm rushhour
traffic is Jammed, so i get off I-94 though i jest *know* that's the only
gettin' off that's gonna happen in Macomb Co. today.
I park & play Monty Hall w/ the 3 steel doors attached to the w wall (the
middle one opens) .... after the light adjustment i spot a stage in one
corner, a smaller stage by the bar, a bouncer by the door, & a half dozen
dancers of the cornfed, amateur nite, "my ex- hasn't made any support pyts
in 5 yrs." variety ... some ain't bad ... shades of the old Nathan's & Men's
Club on Dort in Flint. There's a Red & Green neonDeco bandtube illuminating
the flesh from all around the square room .... i scan for the laplounge &
learn ... there *isn't* a laplounge.
A buxom postadolescent from Chesterfield Township gives me two $5 airdances
(John Belushi ... "Cheezeburger, cheezeburger, cheezeburger") & i split ....
I chat w/ a local homie from New Baltimore in the lot: "Do you ever go to
Sarnia ... it's only 35 miles away?" "Oh, yeah ... i've been to the
Riverport & Studio ... taken [BLANK] out a few times for extras ..." "Why
do you come here?" "It's convenient."
A new slogan for the ASSC Politburo .....
IT'S CONVENIENT
--
* * * * * * * *
People think everything is solved by love. Maybe just as many things are
solved by hate.
- Robert Frost
DrD
>
idle-->The Good: i, of course
DrD--> Sweetness rains down upon my brain as I read this.
idle-->The Bad: Trumpp's on 8 Mile Rd. btwn Telegraph & the Southfield Freeway
DrD-->You mean bad nasty, or just bad horrible. From the description, I'm
thinking bad nasty.
idle-->Truth In Lapping Mileage Report: Better than Incidental Contact ...
vigorous handchecking (waistdown) .... not bad .... but Bad, relatively
speaking .... time to leave.
DrD--> Oh. So you didn't mean bad nasty.
idle-->The Ugly: The TrafficLight ...one mile n of Mount Clemens, off Gratiot,
on Joy Blvd. this one has got to take 1st prize as the ugliest club bldg
outside the Sunbelt ... a squat square cinderblock hall surrounded by a vast
asphalt lot in a swampy industrial wasteland.
DrD--> I thought that was what all strip clubs looked like until I went SF.
idle-->A new slogan for the ASSC Politburo .....
>
>IT'S CONVENIENT
DrD--> Butt of course...
Remove spamblock from header, and replace with stevedrd to reply to me.
Bill of Rights Enforcement
Rev. R2D2
> but, like you, recognized it would be as futile as a Pitbull Terrier Beauty
> Contest
My pit bull is the most beautiful dog on the planet. And he'll shred your ass
if you say otherwise.
idleeric
>idle-->The Ugly: The TrafficLight ...one mile n of Mount Clemens, off
Gratiot,
>on Joy Blvd. this one has got to take 1st prize as the ugliest club bldg
>outside the Sunbelt ... a squat square cinderblock hall surrounded by a
vast
>asphalt lot in a swampy industrial wasteland.
>
>DrD--> I thought that was what all strip clubs looked like until I went SF.
idleeric --> i thought about opening up the topic for further discussion,
but, like you, recognized it would be as futile as a Pitbull Terrier Beauty
Contest
>idle-->A new slogan for the ASSC Politburo .....
>>
>>IT'S CONVENIENT
>
>DrD--> Butt of course...
idleeric --> here's a better subject: the subtle distinction btwn
"idle-ness" & "lazi-ness" (cf. Arthur Krystal, "Who Speaks For The Lazy?" ..
current NYer); i support two propostions:
a) no *true* ASSCer is truly lazy .... we all aspire to our own particular
Ripkenese feats of ennui endurance .... who spends the longer time in a
club? who can get the greatest # of laps? who spends/wastes the most $$$
on an ATF? (my personal fav,) who posts the most in ass-c? etc.
b) *every* true ASSCer is "idle".
idleeric
squid wrote in message <7gck9a$vf6$1...@nnrp1.dejanews.com>...
>In article <7gajha$r9b$1...@east44.supernews.com>,
> "idleeric" <std...@mich.com> wrote:
>>
>>
>> idleeric --> here's a better subject: the subtle distinction btwn
>> "idle-ness" & "lazi-ness" (cf. Arthur Krystal, "Who Speaks For The Lazy?"
..
>> current NYer); i support two propostions:
>>
>> a) no *true* ASSCer is truly lazy .... we all aspire to our own
particular
>> Ripkenese feats of ennui endurance .... who spends the longer time in a
>> club? who can get the greatest # of laps? who spends/wastes the most
$$$
>> on an ATF? (my personal fav,) who posts the most in ass-c? etc.
>
>I can't touch the feats that require wads of money, but I did spend 11.5
hours
>in a club in one night.
>
>> b) *every* true ASSCer is "idle".
>
>Guilty as charged.
idleeric --> for your penance, go to your fav club & read cover to cover the
following books:
1. THE EDUCATION OF HENRY ADAMS by Henry Adams*
2. THE VARIETIES OF RELIGIOUS EXPERIENCE by William James*
3. UP FROM SLAVERY by Booker T. Washington*
4. A ROOM OF ONE'S OWN by Virginia Woolf
5. SILENT SPRING by Rachel Carson
6. SELECTED ESSAYS, 1917-1932 by T. S. Eliot
7. THE DOUBLE HELIX by James D. Watson
8. SPEAK, MEMORY by Vladimir Nabokov
9. THE AMERICAN LANGUAGE by H. L. Mencken
10. THE GENERAL THEORY OF EMPLOYMENT, INTEREST, AND MONEY by John Maynard
Keynes
11. THE LIVES OF A CELL by Lewis Thomas
12. THE FRONTIER IN AMERICAN HISTORY by Frederick Jackson Turner
13. BLACK BOY by Richard Wright
14. ASPECTS OF THE NOVEL by E. M. Forster
15. THE CIVIL WAR by Shelby Foote*
16. THE GUNS OF AUGUST by Barbara Tuchman
17. THE PROPER STUDY OF MANKIND by Isaiah Berlin
18. THE NATURE AND DESTINY OF MAN by Reinhold Niebuhr
19. NOTES OF A NATIVE SON by James Baldwin
20. THE AUTOBIOGRAPHY OF ALICE B. TOKLAS by Gertrude Stein*
21. THE ELEMENTS OF STYLE by William Strunk and E. B. White
22. AN AMERICAN DILEMMA by Gunnar Myrdal
23. PRINCIPIA MATHEMATICA by Alfred North Whitehead and Bertrand Russell
24. THE MISMEASURE OF MAN by Stephen Jay Gould
25. THE MIRROR AND THE LAMP by Meyer Howard Abrams
26. THE ART OF THE SOLUBLE by Peter B. Medawar
27. THE ANTS by Bert Hoelldobler and Edward O. Wilson
28. A THEORY OF JUSTICE by John Rawls
29. ART AND ILLUSION by Ernest H. Gombrich
30. THE MAKING OF THE ENGLISH WORKING CLASS by E. P. Thompson
31. THE SOULS OF BLACK FOLK by W.E.B. Du Bois*
32. PRINCIPIA ETHICA by G. E. Moore
33. PHILOSOPHY AND CIVILIZATION by John Dewey
34. ON GROWTH AND FORM by D'Arcy Thompson*
35. IDEAS AND OPINIONS by Albert Einstein*
36. THE AGE OF JACKSON, Arthur Schlesinger by Jr.
37. THE MAKING OF THE ATOMIC BOMB by Richard Rhodes
38. BLACK LAMB and Grey Falcon by Rebecca West
39. AUTOBIOGRAPHIES by W. B. Yeats
40. SCIENCE AND CIVILIZATION IN CHINA by Joseph Needham
41. GOODBYE TO ALL THAT by Robert Graves
42. HOMAGE TO CATALONIA by George Orwell
43. THE AUTOBIOGRAPHY OF MARK TWAIN by Mark Twain
44. CHILDREN OF CRISIS by Robert Coles
45. A STUDY OF HISTORY by Arnold J. Toynbee
46. THE AFFLUENT SOCIETY by John Kenneth Galbraith
47. PRESENT AT THE CREATION by Dean Acheson
48. THE GREAT BRIDGE by David McCullough
49. PATRIOTIC GORE by Edmund Wilson
50. SAMUEL JOHNSON by Walter Jackson Bate
51. THE AUTOBIOGRAPHY OF MALCOLM X by Alex Haley and Malcolm X
52. THE RIGHT STUFF by Tom Wolfe
53. EMINENT VICTORIANS by Lytton Strachey*
54. WORKING by Studs Terkel
55. DARKNESS VISIBLE by William Styron
56. THE LIBERAL IMAGINATION by Lionel Trilling
57. THE SECOND WORLD WAR by Winston Churchill
58. OUT OF AFRICA by Isak Dinesen*
59. JEFFERSON AND HIS TIME by Dumas Malone
60. IN THE AMERICAN GRAIN by William Carlos Williams
61. CADILLAC DESERT by Marc Reisner
62. THE HOUSE OF MORGAN by Ron Chernow
63. THE SWEET SCIENCE by A. J. Liebling
64. THE OPEN SOCIETY AND ITS ENEMIES by Karl Popper
65. THE ART OF MEMORY by Frances A. Yates
66. RELIGION AND THE RISE OF CAPITALISM by R. H. Tawney
67. A PREFACE TO MORALS by Walter Lippmann
68. THE GATE OF HEAVENLY PEACE by Jonathan D. Spence
69. THE STRUCTURE OF SCIENTIFIC REVOLUTIONS by Thomas S. Kuhn
70. THE STRANGE CAREER OF JIM CROW by C. Vann Woodward
71. THE RISE OF THE WEST by William H. McNeill
72. THE GNOSTIC GOSPELS by Elaine Pagels
73. JAMES JOYCE by Richard Ellmann
74. FLORENCE NIGHTINGALE by Cecil Woodham-Smith
75. THE GREAT WAR AND MODERN MEMORY by Paul Fussell
76. THE CITY IN HISTORY by Lewis Mumford
77. BATTLE CRY OF FREEDOM by James M. McPherson
78. WHY WE CAN'T WAIT by Martin Luther King by Jr.
79. THE RISE OF THEODORE ROOSEVELT by Edmund Morris
80. STUDIES IN ICONOLOGY by Erwin Panofsky
81. THE FACE OF BATTLE by John Keegan
82. THE STRANGE DEATH OF LIBERAL ENGLAND by George Dangerfield
83. VERMEER by Lawrence Gowing
84. A BRIGHT SHINING LIE by Neil Sheehan
85. WEST WITH THE NIGHT by Beryl Markham
86. THIS BOY'S LIFE by Tobias Wolff
87. A MATHEMATICIAN'S APOLOGY by G. H. Hardy
88. SIX EASY PIECES by Richard P. Feynman
89. PILGRIM AT TINKER CREEK by Annie Dillard
90. THE GOLDEN BOUGH by James George Frazer
91. SHADOW AND ACT by Ralph Ellison
92. THE POWER BROKER by Robert A. Caro
93. THE AMERICAN POLITICAL TRADITION by Richard Hofstadter
94. THE CONTOURS OF AMERICAN HISTORY by William Appleman Williams
95. THE PROMISE OF AMERICAN LIFE by Herbert Croly
96. IN COLD BLOOD by Truman Capote*
97. THE JOURNALIST AND THE MURDERER by Janet Malcolm
98. THE TAMING OF CHANCE by Ian Hacking
99. OPERATING INSTRUCTIONS by Anne Lamott
100. MELBOURNE by Lord David Cecil
* * * * * * * *
Boswell: " ... we grow weary when idle."
Dr. Johnson: "That is, sir, because others being busy, we want company.; but
if we were idle, there would be no growing weary; we should all entertain
one another."
squid
"idleeric" <std...@mich.com> wrote:
>
>
> idleeric --> here's a better subject: the subtle distinction btwn
> "idle-ness" & "lazi-ness" (cf. Arthur Krystal, "Who Speaks For The Lazy?" ..
> current NYer); i support two propostions:
>
> a) no *true* ASSCer is truly lazy .... we all aspire to our own particular
> Ripkenese feats of ennui endurance .... who spends the longer time in a
> club? who can get the greatest # of laps? who spends/wastes the most $$$
> on an ATF? (my personal fav,) who posts the most in ass-c? etc.
I can't touch the feats that require wads of money, but I did spend 11.5 hours
in a club in one night.
> b) *every* true ASSCer is "idle".
Guilty as charged.
squid
--
"If I can't get a tax on lap dancing, hell, can I
get tax reform?" -- Lawton Chiles
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