Scientific Way to Measure How Bad a Fart Smells?
WallyWonka
http://www.popsci.com/scitech/article/2009-08/there-scientific-way-measur
e-fart-smell
You�re in luck. For their senior project, two Cornell University
computer-engineering whizzes recently built a machine that does just
that. After learning in class how breathalyzers work, Robert Clain and
Miguel Salas assembled a fart detector from a sensitive hydrogen sulfide
monitor, a thermometer and a microphone and wrote the software that
would rate the emission. A �slight perturbance in the air� near the
detector sets it to work measuring the three pillars of fart quality:
stench, temperature and sound. Temperature, Clain explains, is critical.
The hotter a fart, the faster it spreads. �It beeps faster if it�s a
high ranker, and a voice rates it on a scale of zero to nine,� he says.
�If it ranks a nine, a fan comes on to blow it away. It even records the
noise so you can play it back later.� After a few months of
construction, they began field tests. �Well, the sample data wasn�t the
entire school, but we definitely tested it,� Salas says.
The contraption could even have use outside of fraternity houses, Clain
says, as a biosensor for harmful hydrogen-sulfide-producing bacteria in
hospitals. Or dentists could use it to measure oral malodor. They�ve
also received some interest from doctors with four-legged patients. �You
can test the health of livestock through the quality of their farts,�
Salas says. �Smell and sound can tell you a lot about their bowel
movements.�
When it came time to present the invention in class, though, Clain and
Salas had to test their detector by making raspberry sounds and
breathing on it�human exhalations contain enough hydrogen sulfide to
trigger the sensor. �It�s hard to fart something really smelly on
command,� Clain laments. �Besides, it provided a nicer atmosphere for
those around us.� Still, their professor saw fit to award the project a
well-deserved A.
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The meter on this over at PEDOSHINE's SLUM HOLE would just EXPLODE
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�o|o�
Xander Crews
"WallyWonka" <wa...@2us2.com> wrote in message
news:wanka-A3C89A....@70-3-168-216.pools.spcsdns.net...
> Scientific Way to Measure How Bad a Fart Smells?
I don't need science, I can tell just by standing within 2000 feet of you.
And believe me, Willy, that ain't chocolate coming out of your ass.
iL_WeReo
The more reefer you smoke, the worse it smells.