Seasonal Defective Disorder
Chris Cottrell
As we approach the midpoint(s) of the winter celebrations, I am
wondering for many here how they handle a bifurcated holiday?
What I mean is that calendar-end/winter presents seasonal observances
that roughly coincide, but basically the social expectations diverge
from personal practice, leading to nature honorings alongside the
festivities of Xmas, Hannukah, Kwanzaa, etc.
The division must affect at least some of us, at least to the point of
some feeling of division. Does it make one feel an outsider from the
human family during a season of purportedly celebrating the
brotherhood of Man (or at least the inclusiveness within a particular
body of believers)? Does one 'play along' while slipping in neutral
terms like "Happy Holidays" or "yuletide", and does that create some
level of stress? Does one feel a little compromised when drawn into
things like "Secret Santa" gifting, or does one agilely do mental
gymnastics to spare one's integrity? And, bottom line, is it okay for
a pagan to participate in Xmas?
I know this season is no compromise for christo-pagans, but do other
pagans here feel a little schizophrenic handling dual obligations to
social observance and personal beliefs? What do you think of this?
How do you personally handle it?
-Thenie
posting from Baptist Town, Jesus Country, NC
Wood Avens
Living in the northern hemisphere, I treat it all as one big midwinter
festival, celebrated in slightly different ways and at slightly
different times by many different faiths and cultures but all in one
way or another finding a reason to gather in groups and have a party.
The need to cheer up the darkest part of the year and to celebrate the
return of the sun seems to be pretty ingrained in most Northern
societies, and if particular religions attach their own stories to the
festivities I'm not one to argue.
The cards I send out say "Midwinter greetings!" and no-one's objected
yet. I've had Solstice parties and friends of all faiths and none
have happily come along and lit candles, but I haven't stressed the
"Pagan" aspect, any more than the friends or relatives whose
"Christmas" parties I go to are likely to stress any "Christian"
aspect. That said, for many of the people I know it's purely a
secular festival. Maybe it would be different if I lived in the USA
mid-west.
I'm sure I've said before that I don't mind calling the national
midwinter festival after the Christian deity as long as Christians
remain happy to call the days of the week after Pagan deities.
Midwinter greetings (slightly early) to you all!
--
Wood Avens
Good wine improves with age. The older I get, the more I like it.
spamtrap: remove the first two letters after the @
Gale
<snip>
>
> I know this season is no compromise for christo-pagans, but do other
> pagans here feel a little schizophrenic handling dual obligations to
> social observance and personal beliefs? What do you think of this?
> How do you personally handle it?
Other than tugging at what remains of my hair when some fundie starts a
rant about 'putting Christ back in Christmas,' I'm completely unperturbed.
I can't match Wood Avens' delightfully articulate reply, but I can note
the Hanukkah lights I put in a window for my spouse, my Yule tree
visible from the front window, and my Yule log (which I can't really
light with my dirty flue) in the fireplace. It is the season when
everyone can celebrate -- since, in that one area of our lives we have
succeeded in routing the Dour Puritans and the capitalists become more
interesting in exploiting consumers than workers for the day, we've the
opportunity for near-universal joy.
Dickens left Scrooge (the capitalist) at his nephew's opulent table, the
ghost of Scrooge's puritanical father routed (I think I see the
Puritanism in that briefly mentioned figure of familial malice). I'm
satisfied. Merry Old England had room for Bertilak the Green Knight as
well as Arthur, and Gawain found himself being wined, dined, and tested
at the table of Morgan the Goddess one year. It is only fair that I find
joy in my neighbors' Christmas lights as well as my Yule lights, my
spouse's Hanukkah lights, and any other sparkling elements of seasonal
pleasure anyone can offer as we (in the northern hemisphere) celebrate
the return of the sun.
Joyous Yule!
http://www.capjewels.com/gale/yule/2008yulecard.html
(sorry it's the same 'card' as last year's; I haven't managed a new one)
--
Blessed Be,
Gale
poetry, fiction, essays at http://www.capjewels.com/
"Above all remember this: that magic belongs as much to the heart
as to the head and everything which is done, should be done from
love or joy or righteous anger." Susanna Clarke, The Ladies of Grace Adieu
Baird Stafford
<274ceddc-fd6f-4413...@d20g2000yqh.googlegroups.com>,
Chris Cottrell <theni...@gmail.com> wrote:
<snip>
> I know this season is no compromise for christo-pagans, but do other
> pagans here feel a little schizophrenic handling dual obligations to
> social observance and personal beliefs? What do you think of this?
> How do you personally handle it?
My sister and her family celebrate Channukah, my in-laws celebrate
Christmas, and the SO and I celebrate Yule. In the first two cases, the
SO and I do only the secular bits - gifts, cards, and in the case of his
family, Christmas dinner. Only for ourselves do we do the religious
bits.
Evangels lament the "removal of Christ from Christmas," but in a
multi-cultural society the secularization of the holidays makes it
possible to wish the best of the season to everyone of one's
acquaintance - in my opinion, without hypocrisy.
Blessed be,
Baird
--
In theory there is no difference between theory and practice. In practice
there is. -Yogi Berra
storm
When the kids were young, we always approached it as "have as many
holidays as you can". With some changes over the years, we still do.
As for work and strangers, "Happy Holidays" works just fine.
However, I end up explaining at least once per year to someone why I
am unavailable for oncall on the 21st but available on the 25th. I'm
pretty good at the explain things simply routine, so I haven't gotten
any negative feedback yet. I even know one person who wants to know
about the local community Drumming Up the Sun.
-storm
Wood Avens
<ba...@newstaff.com> wrote:
>My sister and her family celebrate Channukah, my in-laws celebrate
>Christmas, and the SO and I celebrate Yule.
Just to add that I was chatting the other week with two colleagues
from the Oxford Council of Faiths - one Jewish, one Hindu. "I always
put up a Christmas tree," said the Hindu. "Oh, so do I," said the
Jew. "I wait till the end of Chanukah, though."
And mine will be up for my grandchildren to decorate tomorrow.
--
Katy Jennison
Yowie
news:274ceddc-fd6f-4413...@d20g2000yqh.googlegroups.com
If you want a truly schizophrenic Holiday experience, try celebrating the
usual seasonal observations, rituals and celebrations that occur in
December when its the height of summer.
I can't tell you whether its OK for you to celebrate Xmas, or Christmas, or
the 'holidays' or even Yule. All I can say is that many many people, not
just Pagans, are not interested and/or don't believe in the Christian story
of Jesus's literal birth on the 25th of December. But even those who don't
believe (or who aren't particularly interested in that side of things) still
observe something that day because it is not *only* a religous holiday for
Christians but its a *cultural* holiday for most if not all western
countries as well. Ironically,t hose who have a profound and literal belief
in the birth of Jesus on the 25th of December tend not to celebrate as the
rest of us do, because they want to make it purely a religious observation
and not the secular holiday with Santa (not Christian), gift giving (modern)
and all the Pagan trimmings (lights, evergreen trees, yule logs etc etc)
What I can tell you is that I am not Jewish and am mostly ignorant about
Jewish Holidays, but have been asked for forgiveness on the Day of
Atonement - and have given it (and not knowing what it was about, asked for
the same and was received very warmly despite my obvious confusion), and
whilst I am not Chinese, I am happy to wish folks a Happy Chinese New Year
(with my best Aussie accent "Gung Hay Fat Choy") and them to wish me the
same.
Except for the very devout, even to most nominal Christians, Christmas is
not so much about Christ, but about family & friends (those of us who don't
have a formal Thankgsiving day tend to treat it much like a festival to be
grateful for what one has). Fervent athiests happily celebrate secular
Christmas without flinching, and they have no way in which 'mental
gymnastics' can help in that regard (At least Pagans have some rituals and
observations in common with modern western secular Christmas)
Perhaps asking Jewish folks about how they cope with Christmas might give
you some insight into folks who are very much part of Western culture but
follow a religion that doesn't have a (big) celebration in winter? How do
they deal with Santa, nativity plays, office Christmas parties, receiving
Christian-orientated Christmas cards and the like?
> -Thenie
> posting from Baptist Town, Jesus Country, NC
Oh dear. The irony.
Yowie
--
If you're paddling upstream in a canoe and a wheel falls off, how many
pancakes can you fit in a doghouse? None, icecream doesn't have bones.
Don Hilliker
<wood...@askjennison.com> wrote:
>On Sat, 19 Dec 2009 14:32:29 -0600, Baird Stafford
><ba...@newstaff.com> wrote:
>
>>My sister and her family celebrate Channukah, my in-laws celebrate
>>Christmas, and the SO and I celebrate Yule.
>
>Just to add that I was chatting the other week with two colleagues
>from the Oxford Council of Faiths - one Jewish, one Hindu. "I always
>put up a Christmas tree," said the Hindu. "Oh, so do I," said the
>Jew. "I wait till the end of Chanukah, though."
>
>And mine will be up for my grandchildren to decorate tomorrow.
and mine went up at american thanksgiving, with my 2 most important
ladies in the world putting it up, my lifemate and younger daugher
(recentley divorced from a substance abuser). We selectecd a nice
tree from the field and I dug it, potted it and brought it up since in
way up north Michiigan US the snow hits early. For the 2 mornings of
the longest night, I was headed east at sunup for work since my
counterpart is taking seasonal vactation. On the first moring when I
was headed to the west for more parts, I was granted a stunning show
of trees showing off in red along with the crisp rhime ice (temp was
-4.3f when I left the house). On the 2nd morning, I was headed east,
and was blessed with a southeast road turn for 5 miles just as the sun
was cresting. It started with a stunning single pillar headed to the
lady, and gradually the warming to heavy red of the sky around where
it was cresting. ALLMOST but not really made up for the BS that AT&T
provided with my having to travel 200 miles one way for several days
in a row to complete end of year builds that everyone in the office
forgot to order any of the facitliies for. If the conditions had not
been once again denied vaction (to be lost as not used) because
everyone above me forgot to place the correct orders for (power)
(telco) (building permits) (e911) (transmeiter permits), it would have
been a perfect yule. Sorry to rant, but since this is the 3rd yule in
a row taken away from me for the same reasons, and I have lost an
agergate 60 hours of time off not allowed to use becuase of "needed
last minute work", and that yet once again this year, the work will
not be completed until the common new year since I dont have the
facilities or support to make it happen yes I am a bit irrittated
(PISSY). Sorry to all for the rant but it sucks to be working for the
worlds largers telco company, and after 5 years of service (30 in my
field), be working now for less than I started for the small cell
company I went to work for to leave the mega corps. Seems that even
though they have signed my checks for 2 years now, I am only worth
wage step zero to them, which when combined with the sudden cost of
health insurance as a "represendted" employee took my salary to a few
cents below where it was when I hired on to a small cellular companie.
Again sorry for the rant but...., and just to makt in interesting, I
am expecting to get written up for failting to commision a new cell
site today since senior management decided that it had to be on the
air yesterday. Guess the minor facts like commercail power, telco to
the site, and acutally wiring of the site dont count. This will be my
3rd write up in the past 12 months over the same issues, management
faills to plan, facilities are not in place but its the feild tech's
fault the site is not on the air at the planned time, 2 to 3 days
after he is informed it is to be on the air. Again, sorry for the
rant but lacking any other venue this is the only place I can vent and
not get fired
Don Hilliker, Intricate Articles
http://www.intricatearticles.com
Chris Cottrell
On Dec 23, 10:24�pm, Don Hilliker <don@i*spamntricatearticles.com>
wrote:
> On Sun, 20 Dec 2009 07:18:01 -0600, Wood Avens
>
You are perfectly welcome to vent here; we all need a safe place (and
boy, have I availed myself of that on maybe too many occasions).
That being said...
You miss a couple of things:
You have family. What's more, you have family that love you and are
near you daily. My children are apparently going through things that
move them to keep me out of their lives, and I love and miss them even
though they don't even want to hear from me. My son is mentally ill
and wishes me actual physical harm, and there is no repairing
genetics. My two ex-husbands wish me ill as well, but that is their
burden, not mine. I have the blessing of dear friends I've kept over
the decades, but I miss my children and having the opportunity to
lavish affection on them. And currently I have the grace of my mother
being a part of my life, but that has not always been so.
You have family, and that is a dear blessing. Warm yourself to that,
even if you are separated from them by idiot employers.
Which brings me to my next point: you have employment. Too many
currently don't have that, myself included. I would be in the street
but for a last minute new federal program that pays my rent while I
search for employment. I have thousands in student loan payments
coming soon, and I can't even find a job in the field I trained for.
Much as you are wotking for idiots, you are working, and you can pay
bills and have a Yule. I am spending the season alone and without
funds to send gifts to friends. I will say a 'fairy godmother' has
come forth and provided me a respite so that my bills are paid through
January, and she promises to help with future plans if a job does
materialize (still waiting on a response from my 'dream job'), and
without that gift I would have a very sober and dull holiday season.
I recognize having that respite as a gift and I see many every day who
don't even have that.
You have employment and the self-determination that is afforded
through an income. Count that blessing even if it's a stressful and
thankless job. Use it as a tool to prepare for being without a job or
for finding a less stressful or thankless position.
Finally, you have a home. Not just a house, but a home. Part of
being 'homeless' is not just a matter of no housing, but having no
home or place you belong. It's being so out of control that you don't
know where you'll be or what you will be subjected to moment by
moment. Worse yet is if you end up dragging a family through it;
that's the one time having family can be a real curse, when you're
responsible for/to people you love and in no position to give them
housing or protection. Too many right now are losing or have lost
their home, and I was circling that drain myself a very short while
ago. Even though I have retained my housing, I am an older woman
living alone in a complex that houses college students, who currently
are away for the holdays. It's very lonely here.
You have a house that is a home, with people there to welcome you back
in from the trek into the cold, who must appreciate (on some level)
that you brave the elements for their sakes. If you have to do this
job for now, do it as a ritual for them; dedicate you action each day
to them, in a conscious and intentional way. Give over the effort and
the struggle to the concept of home and family; lay it on that altar.
And count that blessing.
I almost forgot one more blessing: health. If you can work, if you
can drive, you have sufficient health to bless the grace of having it.
This is a calendar end of year, and it is for some an end/beginning
for the Wheel of the Year (some use Samhain, some use Yule). It's a
perfect time for inventorying what one does or does not have and
working up a list of those things that need 'adjustment'. Inventory
what you have and what you'd like to change. Bless that which you
have, and define ways to change what needs changing. Make a path for
the Springtime breezes to blow opportunity and the unexpected your
way. I will say, though, that dwelling on the things you resent (and
it sounds like these things have been brewing in you for some time)
tend to draw more unpleasantness; imagining better and counting
blessings tend to draw improvement. Just sayin'...
I wish the best to you this coming year and great joy from the
blessings already in your life. I envy you your riches.
-'Thenie
Hmmmm... What kind of seasonal meal for one can one make from 10 lbs
of chicken leg quarters and no potatoes...
Gale
<snip> For the 2 mornings of
> the longest night, I was headed east at sunup for work since my
> counterpart is taking seasonal vactation. On the first moring when I
> was headed to the west for more parts, I was granted a stunning show
> of trees showing off in red along with the crisp rhime ice (temp was
> -4.3f when I left the house). On the 2nd morning, I was headed east,
> and was blessed with a southeast road turn for 5 miles just as the sun
> was cresting. It started with a stunning single pillar headed to the
> lady, and gradually the warming to heavy red of the sky around where
Mummmm! I'm busy visualizing those mornings, tying them to a few of my
own memories from when I was far enough north to experience the 'distant
sun' (you can do it in West Virginia; you can't do it in Mississippi). I
try to explain 'awe' when I define 'the sublime' to my students. I don't
know that I ever much succeed, but 'I know it when I feel it.' :-)
Don't worry about the rant; you're more than entitled. It's strange that
some of life's most beautiful moments come into view while you're busy
wading through hell.
Don Hilliker
>Don Hilliker wrote:
><snip> For the 2 mornings of
>> the longest night, I was headed east at sunup for work since my
>> counterpart is taking seasonal vactation. On the first moring when I
>> was headed to the west for more parts, I was granted a stunning show
>> of trees showing off in red along with the crisp rhime ice (temp was
>> -4.3f when I left the house). On the 2nd morning, I was headed east,
>> and was blessed with a southeast road turn for 5 miles just as the sun
>> was cresting. It started with a stunning single pillar headed to the
>> lady, and gradually the warming to heavy red of the sky around where
>> it was cresting. <snip>
>
>Mummmm! I'm busy visualizing those mornings, tying them to a few of my
>own memories from when I was far enough north to experience the 'distant
>sun' (you can do it in West Virginia; you can't do it in Mississippi). I
>try to explain 'awe' when I define 'the sublime' to my students. I don't
>know that I ever much succeed, but 'I know it when I feel it.' :-)
>
>Don't worry about the rant; you're more than entitled. It's strange that
>some of life's most beautiful moments come into view while you're busy
>wading through hell.
Gale and Thenie:
Thanks for the kind responses. One of the pleasures I do enjoy in the
rural north is the stunning unsulled views. Just been getting hard to
deal with work since the gobble up by the mega corp. Today I earned
number 4 by working the hours needed to do the job given without prior
OT approval since the only approve is on vacation. Just have to love
the world today, but I am thankful for having decent employment, a
loving compainion (we passed 18 years together last month), and a step
daughter who has been mine for so long I am just pops even if she is a
long grown woman. Add in 2 doxies who dont know they are dogs, and a
14 year old molli cat even more in the same boat. I know I have it
better than many, but it gets hard with a lack of a place to vent off
the bad before it truely becomes bad. My lady was concerned the last
couple of days when I walked in because I did not want to talk - I
explained what was going on and hope she understands it was work that
I was keeping out of the house, although when I had to call home today
to let her know that I would be late getting home the words that
flowed about my employer would have done me proud when I was an active
sailor who prided himself on the abiity to curse in 15
languages.......
Thanks for you warmth an support. If I can get another of those
monrings in the next couple of months, will try to capture the moment
and post the pictures on a sub web page for you to enjoy.
Brightest of Blessings to one and all