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smth...@bcvms.bc.edu (Sean Smith) wrote:The problem is all in your mind. You should watch that old Star Trek
>>Tomorrow I'm going to experience the single scarcest event of my life
>>(other than a few rollercosters I've regretfully been on): I'm getting
>>all four of my wisdom teeth out.
episode where Spock has to do a mind meld with Kirk, Scotty, and Bones
before they go into a shoot out at the OK Corral. Spock tells them if
they have no fear, the bullets won't hurt them. In the same way, your
fear can harm you only if you let it. The biggest danger with having
wisdom teeth pulled is that dentists always sexually molest you while
you're under the anaesthetic.
>>I'm going to be pumped up with a combination of Sodium Pentothal,Tell the dentist you want helium and xenon too: then when you laugh,
>>laughing gas and valium. (Guess I'm going to be telling the truth
>>while laughing in a really laid back way.)
you'll sound like Woody Woodpecker and Satan.
>>I'm sure everything will work out fine, but if it doesn't and I goEven if you do go into a coma, you can still keep posting to Usenet --
>>into a coma or something, I just want Usenet to know I've had fun.
everyone else does.
>I wish I could say "I feel your pain" and truly mean it, LSB, butMe too, although it's hard to tell with my jumbled dentition. When my
>fact is I've never had my wisdom teeth out.
>What's more, I've never even had any wisdom teeth. Period.
>Yup, my dentists have over the years searched high and low for any evidence
>of wisdom teeth in my mouth, and they've found bugger all.
dentist first examined my teeth, he said it looked like my mouth was
playing a game of Yahtzee. So I stabbed him in the ass with the dirty
needle I use to crank scag.
>Now, someone (might've even been one of the dentists) once told me thatTeeth undergo rapid morphological genetic variations under changing
>scientific theory sez in another millenium or so, no one will ever have wisdom
>teeth ever again. Which seemed to imply that I and other non-wisdom teethers
>are the advance guard of a future evolutionary stage of the human race. I've
>hesitated to make this too well-known, on the off-chance that one night I
>might be shunted off to some institute where I'd be examined to determine
>whether I possess secret powers. Then the neighbors might start coming round and
>ask me to revive their dead gerbil or levitate their new satellite dish up on
>top of their roof.
>All I can say is, if I do represent a next step along the evolutionary pathway,
>then I hope the step after me is better at matching colors.
selective conditions. After a few generations of 1 minute oatmeal and
microwave lasagna, I doubt humans will have anything more than two
incisors for tearing open potato chip bags.
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