I met Nick
red
head, the narrator one, was pronouncing "Kibo" wrong. Damn.
Kibble rhymes with quibble. Thus, I thought Kibo had the same soft i. Nope.
Kibo rhymes with Tae Bo. (Who'd have thought? Probably the same people who
think that lopping off the "t" in "gift" makes it suddenly change to Jif.)
We saw that movie with that prettyboy actor who wrote the screenplay about the
dude who goes to MIT even though he's really poor. We discussed many operating
systems and appended the phrase "on fire" to our fortune cookie prophesies.
I'll leave the zaniest part of our madcap adventure to Nick. :-)
red
-------------------
www.planetstace.com
Happy 1900
Poot Rootbeer
>Kibo rhymes with Tae Bo. (Who'd have thought? Probably the
>same people who think that lopping off the "t" in "gift" makes it
>suddenly change to Jif.)
Well, since CompuServe originally designed the GIF format for
transferring pictures of giraffes, the full name of the format is
"Giraffe Interchange Format", thus the correct proper pronunciation of
the acronym is with the chewy /g/ sound instead of the lumpy /g/.
Also, I know your name is s'posed to be pronoinced with the long /e/
sound, because you play ClariNet and clarinets have reeds.
-/Pö-ôt/
^
\__a perl script!
Nick Bensema
Yesterday I had lunch with a stunningly gorgeous red-headed woman, and
saw a thrilling, suspenseful movie with her. We talked about a lot of
things, we laughed, and I'd say we got along splendidly.
And not once did I get a hard-on. :-)
--
Nick Bensema <ni...@io.com> ICQ#2135445
~~~~ ~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Leo Sgouros
"Nick Bensema" <ni...@fnord.io.com> wrote in message
news:85bhfs$ru4$1...@hiram.io.com...
Nick, you are my hero!1!!!!
And I dunno, but those matching smileys are screaming at me.
Did you at least get in one of those photo booths and take a wacky picture?
If you guys "do it again" make sure you do that.
And if you go ice skating, its troooo lurv!1!!!!
Fire Engines All Day Long
> In article <Pine.GSO.3.96.100010...@general3.asu.edu>,
> red <kip...@imap2.asu.edu> wrote:
> >
> >I'll leave the zaniest part of our madcap adventure to Nick. :-)
>
> Yesterday I had lunch with a stunningly gorgeous red-headed woman, and
> saw a thrilling, suspenseful movie with her. We talked about a lot of
> things, we laughed, and I'd say we got along splendidly.
>
> And not once did I get a hard-on. :-)
Dammit, Nick. You play guitar! All you had to do was sing "I call her Red"
in a weird cracky voice like Jordan Catalano and she would've melted like
buttah! Ooh, a glaring defect in your cultural literacy is going to cost
you points!
Robert "Nick Bensema: Hero and Heartthrob" Caponi
PS: And, yes, I did see the movie where Matt Damon is faced with the
difficult task of portraying a great-looking genius. He thinks he's such a
hot-dogger with his Fourier systems, and here I sit, stubborn in my belief
that any number of continuous functions can't add up to a *discontinuous*
function. Besides, everybody knows that Fourier, along with his pals Saint
Simon and Owens were COMMIES! COMMIES! COMMIES!
--
T.W.I.D.N. € http://www.nr.infi.net/~tagutcow/twidn.html
$199 a month € http://www.mp3.com/199amonth
Nick Bensema
Leo Sgouros <lsgo...@tampabay.rr.com> wrote:
>
>
>"Nick Bensema" <ni...@fnord.io.com> wrote in message
>news:85bhfs$ru4$1...@hiram.io.com...
>> red <kip...@imap2.asu.edu> wrote:
>> >
>> >I'll leave the zaniest part of our madcap adventure to Nick. :-)
>>
>> Yesterday I had lunch with a stunningly gorgeous red-headed woman, and
>> saw a thrilling, suspenseful movie with her. We talked about a lot of
>> things, we laughed, and I'd say we got along splendidly.
>>
>> And not once did I get a hard-on. :-)
>
WHOA! I didn't say I could do it AGAIN... I'm trying to figure out
how to tape it down for next time.
It'll be easier if the next movie we see doesn't have Matt Damon in it.
red
> >> Yesterday I had lunch with a stunningly gorgeous red-headed woman, and
> >> saw a thrilling, suspenseful movie with her. We talked about a lot of
> >> things, we laughed, and I'd say we got along splendidly.
> >>
> >> And not once did I get a hard-on. :-)
> >
> >Nick, you are my hero!1!!!!
Tired of telling women to "ignore that man behind the curtain?" Ashamed of
your frequent inconvenient visits by Mr. Willy? You need....RED! She's the
anti-Viagra, guaranteed to keep you flaccid for hours.
What can I say, I just have that effect over men. I think I kill crops too and
make cows give sour milk. :-)
Leo Sgouros
"red" <kip...@imap2.asu.edu> wrote in message
news:Pine.GSO.3.96.100011...@general5.asu.edu...
I seen your pitcher.
You are hawt.
Please try again you troell.
<smiles>
Nick Bensema
red <kip...@imap2.asu.edu> wrote:
>On 10 Jan 2000, Nick Bensema wrote:
>
>> >> And not once did I get a hard-on. :-)
>> >
>> >Nick, you are my hero!1!!!!
>
>Tired of telling women to "ignore that man behind the curtain?" Ashamed of
>your frequent inconvenient visits by Mr. Willy? You need....RED! She's the
>anti-Viagra, guaranteed to keep you flaccid for hours.
For the record, she is pretty and has a nice body and a cute smile,
but I guess I respect her as a person I suppose.
Does that mean I'm gay? Or do I just need hormone supplements?
Fire Engines All Day Long
tagu...@nr.infi.net (Fire Engines All Day Long) wrote:
> hot-dogger with his Fourier systems, and here I sit, stubborn in my belief
> that any number of continuous functions can't add up to a *discontinuous*
> function. Besides, everybody knows that Fourier, along with his pals Saint
BTW, there's nothing like letting a stupid idea out in the open to air
out, as it was only after I posted this that I realized the error of my
thinking, and realized why proportionally smaller cosine waves add up to a
square wave. This is included for the benefit of those of you who are
playing along at home. *Hrumph*.
Ben Wolfson
>On 10 Jan 2000, Nick Bensema wrote:
>
>> >> Yesterday I had lunch with a stunningly gorgeous red-headed woman, and
>> >> saw a thrilling, suspenseful movie with her. We talked about a lot of
>> >> things, we laughed, and I'd say we got along splendidly.
>> >>
>> >> And not once did I get a hard-on. :-)
>> >
>> >Nick, you are my hero!1!!!!
>
>Tired of telling women to "ignore that man behind the curtain?" Ashamed of
>your frequent inconvenient visits by Mr. Willy? You need....RED! She's the
>anti-Viagra, guaranteed to keep you flaccid for hours.
>
>What can I say, I just have that effect over men. I think I kill crops too and
>make cows give sour milk. :-)
Stop plagiarizing Harry Shearer.
<---- where link would go if the new le show were up yet.
--
Barnabas T. Rumjuggler
Eusa wuz a noing man he noet how to bigger the smaul & he noet how to
smauler the big.
-- Russell Hoban, _Riddley Walker_
David DeLaney
>For the record, she is pretty and has a nice body and a cute smile,
>but I guess I respect her as a person I suppose.
Not that there's anything wrong with that.
>Does that mean I'm gay? Or do I just need hormone supplements?
No ... it just means that you've taken the first step out of TeenHood.
Dave "Soon, you'll no longer be bothered by those inconvenent bouts of
unexpected tumescence, -and- you'll beable to talk to girls for hours at
a time without ... blushing ... once! They appreciate that, you know" DeLaney
--
\/David DeLaney d...@panacea.phys.utk.edu "It's not the pot that grows the flower
It's not the clock that slows the hour The definition's plain for anyone to see
Love is all it takes to make a family" - R&P. VISUALIZE HAPPYNET VRbeable<BLINK>
http://panacea.phys.utk.edu/~dbd/ - net.legends FAQ/ I WUV you in all CAPS! --K.
red
> I seen your pitcher.
> You are hawt.
> Please try again you troell.
> <smiles>
Troll????
Dean Lenort
> david lynch <dfly...@louisville.edu> writes:
>
> > Give it a while and you'll no longer be bothered by bouts of EXPECTED
> > tumescence either.
> >
> > What? ME bitter?
>
> How should I know? I've never tasted your tumescence.
UNSUBSCIRBE!!!!1!
Hey kids! Would you like to use great memes like this without spending
countless hours digging through the archives of Jaffo, Yonderboy, Kibo, and
the ever unrealiable dejanews? NOW YOU CAN!! Order you're [sic (see? its
just that easy!)] copy of _1001 Kibological Memes_ and pretty soon you'll be
posting with such classics as:
Frustibole
BURMA SHAVE!
IYKWIM, AITYD!
P.S. I am not Joe Bay
STEAMING BOWL OF FUKK!
Karlo Takki does this better than me
and over a dozen more in no time at all! But that's not all. Order now, and
we'll send you free of charge the _Guide to Classic Kibological Quotes_ at NO
extra charge! Learn the origins of such classics as:
It takes 57 pancakes to shingle a dog
Everything Kibo says makes a great quote
Font-o-Meter! Proportional Monospaced
^
THE EQUIVALENCE OF TIME AND MASS
One Step Ahead of the Law
Two Steps Ahead of Vic Damone!
Everybody wants a parasitic t w i n !
Everybody wants to feel like they b e l o n g !
Everybody wants to run away and join the c i r c u s !
[X} will explain the joke
Ethical Mirth Gas/"I'm chaste alright."/Magic Hitler Hats/"Hath grace limits?"
"Tight camel hairs!"/Chili Hamster Tag/The Gilt Charisma/"I gather this calm."
Don't be left out in the cold. Operators are standing by to help you
understand the ravening beast that is kibology. So order yours today! What
have you got to lose other than a few clams?
--
Dean Lenort dean....@att.net
ARCHIMEDES PLUTONIUM IS A LIE...YOU KNOW ABOUT BAY WATCH? - MegaHal
Nick Bensema
red <kip...@imap2.asu.edu> wrote:
>On Mon, 10 Jan 2000, Leo Sgouros wrote:
>
>> I seen your pitcher.
>> You are hawt.
>> Please try again you troell.
>> <smiles>
>
>Troll????
He doesn't believe that really hawt women can talk to a man without
giving him a stiffy.
I'll have you know that every day, beautiful women talk to perfectly
virile, potent men without enhardening them. You may find it easier to
believe when you realize that that's not why talk show hosts put that
desk there, and Arsenio Hall wasn't gay. Though he did lean forward
and shift his weight a lot, but that means nothing because he did it
the most when Roseanne was on.
Jaffo
<dean....@att.net> wrote:
:Karlo Takki does this better than me
I created this damn thing, and I STILL don't think it's funny.
In the FIVE YEARS I've spent posting to this friggin' newsgroup, I have
created exactly TWO memes, and I didn't personally like either of them.
Jaffo
--
"I'd rather be a fake everybody than a real nobody." -- Louis Nick
Jaffo's Home Page: http://www.jaffo.com/
Jaffo's Web Log: http://www.jaffo.com/log.html
Nick Bensema
Jaffo <ja...@jaffo.com> wrote:
>On Tue, 11 Jan 2000 20:39:47 -0600, in alt.religion.kibology , Dean Lenort
><dean....@att.net> wrote:
>
>:Karlo Takki does this better than me
>
>I created this damn thing, and I STILL don't think it's funny.
>
>In the FIVE YEARS I've spent posting to this friggin' newsgroup, I have
>created exactly TWO memes, and I didn't personally like either of them.
The other was "Jaffo's Penis", I'm not afraid to mention that because
this thread has already degenerated into dick jokes. Sorry.
You obviously don't count minor memes like "paying off like a slot
machine" and "heartily endorse this product and/or service" even though
the second one is a Simpsons quote and the first one sort of half-belongs
to Ellen Holmes.
Richard E. Nickle
> In article <Pine.GSO.3.96.100011...@general5.asu.edu>,
> For the record, she is pretty and has a nice body and a cute smile,
> but I guess I respect her as a person I suppose.
>
> Does that mean I'm gay? Or do I just need hormone supplements?
AS A PICNIC BASKET! YOU NEED TO GET YOURSELF SOME
OF THAT! HAVE YOU TRIED HUMPING HER LEG?
Brian Chase
> Tired of telling women to "ignore that man behind the curtain?" Ashamed of
>your frequent inconvenient visits by Mr. Willy? You need....RED! She's the
>anti-Viagra, guaranteed to keep you flaccid for hours.
>
>What can I say, I just have that effect over men. I think I kill crops too and
>make cows give sour milk. :-)
I think Nick just doesn't realize that women like to be perceived at
desireable, and can be flattered by the biological implications. He may
just be over correcting his for behavior from the days when he used to
hand out in Starbucks, wearing his fedora and trenchcoat, casting unbroken
lears at young ladies. All the while making breathy "hehhnn, hehhnn,
hehhnn" noises which were audible from across the room.
I suggest you take him out, slap him around a bit, and jump his bones.
-jarai.
--
--- Brian Chase | b...@world.std.com | http://world.std.com/~bdc/ -----
IT'S SOMETHING INTANGIBLE, NOT WRITTEN JUST TO PLEASE. -- MegaHAL.
http://ciips.ee.uwa.edu.au/~hutch/hal/HAL/
red
> I suggest you take him out, slap him around a bit, and jump his bones.
Oh, sure, "Brian Chase." Nice pseudonym, Nick ;-)
Just kidding...
Brian Chase
> > I suggest you take him out, slap him around a bit, and jump his bones.
>
> Oh, sure, "Brian Chase." Nice pseudonym, Nick ;-)
>
> Just kidding...
That was close.
FOR A MINUTE THERE, I THOUGHT _A GURL_ WAS MAYBE GONNA HURT MY FEELINGS IN
FRONT OF EVERYONE HERE IN A.R.K!
-jarai.
--
--- Brian Chase | b...@world.std.com | http://world.std.com/~bdc/ -----
This 'telephone' has too many shortcomings to be seriously considered as
a means of communication. The device is inherently of no value to us.
-- Western Union internal memo, 1876.
Jaffo
<kip...@imap2.asu.edu> wrote:
:On Sat, 15 Jan 2000, Brian Chase wrote:
:
:> I suggest you take him out, slap him around a bit, and jump his bones.
:
:Oh, sure, "Brian Chase." Nice pseudonym, Nick ;-)
Trust me when I say a LOT of people in this newsgroup endorse Brian's
suggestion.
I hope I'm not a journalist on the day Nick Bensema gets laid. It'll be tough
to pick a headline -- what with hell freezing over and all those pigs flying
around...
I've spent thousands of dollars paying women NOT to sleep with Nick Bensema,
just so I wouldn't be the most pathetic man on the Internet.
Apparently your first check was lost in the mail. I'll send another one.
Jaffo
--
It doesn't matter what it thinks -- IT'S A TALKING MONKEY!
red
> I've spent thousands of dollars paying women NOT to sleep with Nick Bensema,
> just so I wouldn't be the most pathetic man on the Internet.
Oh. So what you're saying is, Nick is Not Allowed.
> Apparently your first check was lost in the mail. I'll send another one.
So have you been paying the men *I* date?
red
didn't know there was a subsidy for that sorta thing, but it does keep freaky
babies out of the world
-------------------
www.planetstace.com
I hate you, Milkman Dan!
Jaffo
<kip...@imap2.asu.edu> wrote:
:On Mon, 17 Jan 2000, Jaffo wrote:
:
:> I've spent thousands of dollars paying women NOT to sleep with Nick Bensema,
:> just so I wouldn't be the most pathetic man on the Internet.
:
:Oh. So what you're saying is, Nick is Not Allowed.
Nonsense! Being Allowed is like being Saved. Once you've got it, nobody can
take it away!
Watching Nick for a couple years now, I've noticed that he is just ON THE
VERGE of becoming cool.
This frightens me for a few reasons.
What we have is a COOL continuum. COOL and PATHETIC are actually linked in a
grand "Circle of Coolness." You can become so pathetic that you actually
become cool again (William Shatner), or you can become so cool that you
actually become pathetic (Jim Carey.)
I'm worried that "sexualized Nick" will become so cool, that he will SHOOT
AROUND the coolness spectrum and GO BACKWARDS, thus losing all this progress
he has made since I've been watching.
Right now, Nick has a "primary motivation" -- having sex. But once Nick has
sex, what then?
What if he has sex and it's not that great? What if he has sex and realizes
(like the rest of us) that it's pretty cool, but that it doesn't really solve
anything.
It could be the end of Nick Bensema!
OR WORSE, he could have sex, become coool, and become SO COOL, that he does a
complete LOOP, SHOOTS OFF THE COOL METER and becomes THIS GUY:
http://www.geocities.com/Hollywood/Studio/6950/sean.html
I care too much about Nick to let this happen, so I pay women not to have sex
with him.
HTH
The Avocado Avenger
>Jaffo <ja...@jaffo.jaffo. wrote:
>>The Chyk With the Worst Name in the World <kip...@imap2.asu.edu> wrote:
>>:On Sat, 15 Jan 2000, Brian Chase wrote:
>>:
>>:> I suggest you take him out, slap him around a bit, and jump his bones.
>>:
>>:Oh, sure, "Brian Chase." Nice pseudonym, Nick ;-)
This sentence amuses me on so many levels ... about six, to be exact.
>>Trust me when I say a LOT of people in this newsgroup endorse Brian's
>>suggestion.
And a lot of people on the newsgroup think it's a teensy bit childish to
keep pushing any woman associated with Nick Bensema to fuck him just to
shut him the hell up. Sure, now you've got some little girl who doesn't
care what you say (and probably wants to fit in and wouldn't dare say
anything upsetting), but it's a pain in the arse to continually get
comments for the rest of your damned life about "Hey, have you slept with
Nick yet? C'mon, sleep with Nick already! Maybe we can get that other
chyk to sleep with Nick! Have you heard if Nick has slept with anyone
yet?" Even then, they're mostly joking, or riffing on a meme, and not
actually endorsing any suggestion.
At least, I hope there's no one sleazy enough on the group to try and
seriously talk some freshman chyk into fucking someone on the newsgroup
for stupid, selfish reasons.
I hope.
>Not that it matters, though. I've kind of been trying, over the last
>month, not to obsess about sex. Not until I get this whole job thing
>under control.
>And for that reason, I've been trying to lay the groundwork for a nice
>comfortable friendship. Because I only have one or two friends left in
>Phoenix that I'm still in touch with, and I'd like to make a new one
>before I get a job somewhere and all my new friends will have to come
>from there. And because I'm just not ready for romance at this
>time. And furthermore, because there's a tiny chance I might just
>relocate out of Phoenix to earn my living, and it would suck if Stace
>and I fell totally in lurrv and then I had to just go away.
Jesus. Is anyone else completely and entirely fukken CREEPED OUT by
this? I mean, "Stace" is RIGHT HERE on the group and you're telling
thousands of readers about fucking her or not fucking her ... GAH! JUST
FUKKEN GAH! There's this word, Nick, the word is "discretion", and you
might consider it. Then again, maybe "Stace" doesn't care, and I should
just killfile you all and stop the nightmares I'm having.
>But, maybe in spring, when the weather starts to scorch again, if I'm
>still living in Arizona and working here as well, if Stace hasn't been
>COMPLETELY scared off by the giant "Please Fuck Nick" petition you've
>been passing around, if we still see each other on a regular basis,
>and if I've grown up enough, something just might happen.
Somebody please tell me I'm imagining all this.
>The only thought I'd like to give is the following:
>Wouldn't it be the coolest thing ever if I had my first time on the
>day that Bob Hope died?
Please. Tell me this is a hallucination brought on by warm milk and
antihistamines.
Stacia * The Avocado Avenger * Life is a tale told by an idiot;
http://www.io.com/~stacia/ * Full of sound and fury,
There is no guacamole anywhere. * Signifying nothing.
Shiro Akaishi
--
//\ ICQ: 26175196
(/__\
/). \.
/ "SHEESH, YOU ALWAYS TAKE THE SIDE OF SUCK!" - Leader Kibo
Nick Bensema
red <kip...@imap2.asu.edu> wrote:
>On Mon, 17 Jan 2000, Jaffo wrote:
>
>> I've spent thousands of dollars paying women NOT to sleep with Nick Bensema,
>> just so I wouldn't be the most pathetic man on the Internet.
>
>Oh. So what you're saying is, Nick is Not Allowed.
No, what he's saying is that it takes thousands of dollars to keep
women from sleeping with me.
But he doesn't know that most of these women have been splitting the
money with me and boffing me anyway. That's how I've been able to live
unemployed for two months, see.
And Stace ruined the whole system by not sleeping with me for real.
Oh well, I sstill have all this crack I can sell.
Nick Bensema
>On Sun, 16 Jan 2000 11:15:13 -0700, in alt.religion.kibology , red
><kip...@imap2.asu.edu> wrote:
>
>:On Sat, 15 Jan 2000, Brian Chase wrote:
>:
>:> I suggest you take him out, slap him around a bit, and jump his bones.
>:
>:Oh, sure, "Brian Chase." Nice pseudonym, Nick ;-)
>
>suggestion.
>
>to pick a headline -- what with hell freezing over and all those pigs flying
>around...
DUDE! You're NOT HELPING.
Not that it matters, though. I've kind of been trying, over the last
month, not to obsess about sex. Not until I get this whole job thing
under control.
And for that reason, I've been trying to lay the groundwork for a nice
comfortable friendship. Because I only have one or two friends left in
Phoenix that I'm still in touch with, and I'd like to make a new one
before I get a job somewhere and all my new friends will have to come
from there. And because I'm just not ready for romance at this
time. And furthermore, because there's a tiny chance I might just
relocate out of Phoenix to earn my living, and it would suck if Stace
and I fell totally in lurrv and then I had to just go away.
But, maybe in spring, when the weather starts to scorch again, if I'm
still living in Arizona and working here as well, if Stace hasn't been
COMPLETELY scared off by the giant "Please Fuck Nick" petition you've
been passing around, if we still see each other on a regular basis,
and if I've grown up enough, something just might happen.
The only thought I'd like to give is the following:
Wouldn't it be the coolest thing ever if I had my first time on the
day that Bob Hope died?
--
Ranjit Bhatnagar
> Wouldn't it be the coolest thing ever if I had my first time on the
> day that Bob Hope died?
And then... nine months later... in accordance with prophecy...
the Evil One is born.
--
oo oo o 'i imagine that he lies, and
r t@p t. c m is often plagued by lines..'
oo oo o - ln
Nick Bensema
The Avocado Avenger <sta...@io.com> wrote:
>ni...@fnord.io.com (Nick Bensema) writes:
>>And for that reason, I've been trying to lay the groundwork for a nice
>>comfortable friendship. Because I only have one or two friends left in
>>Phoenix that I'm still in touch with, and I'd like to make a new one
>>before I get a job somewhere and all my new friends will have to come
>
> Jesus. Is anyone else completely and entirely fukken CREEPED OUT by
>this? I mean, "Stace" is RIGHT HERE on the group and you're telling
>thousands of readers about fucking her or not fucking her ... GAH! JUST
>FUKKEN GAH! There's this word, Nick, the word is "discretion", and you
>might consider it. Then again, maybe "Stace" doesn't care, and I should
>just killfile you all and stop the nightmares I'm having.
Hey, I'm trying to reassure the world that nothing is happening CLICK
CLICK between me and her, and I bet she appreciates the effort. Maybe I
should have used the word "plutonic" in every sentence to spell it out.
And I'm reassuring everyone INCLUDING her that I'm not expecting any
CLICK CLICK stuff between me and her anyway. ESPECIALLY NOW. Far, far in
the future, anything's possible technically, but I'm not counting on it.
And none of YOU little meme-mongers should be expecting it either!
Of course, none of you are going to believe me if I just say it in one
sentence so I have to provide some support for my argument, and I guess
that's where the post took a turn for the too-serious. And I'm sorry
for that.
And not only. but also, at the same time, simultaneously, I'm
reassuring myself that it's OK to spend the first 23 years of my
life without a girlfriend. That's something I didn't know six
months ago. Now that I know, most people would say I'm more mature
now, for knowing that.
I'm trying to distance myself from the angsty little freakboy who
posted 500-line rants about what a big V-word I am as if I was the
only one on ARK, and treated Jaffo like a sort of god because he
found lurv on the Internet TWICE. Is that OK with any of you?
Am I Allowed to grow up a little and set my own goals, hmm?
And by the way. WHEN I HAVE SEX, I AM NOT POSTING IN PUBLIC ABOUT IT.
No matter who it is. So quit it with the betting pools and the theories.
One day, far in the future, you'll read a post of mine and notice I'm
not talking about certain things in the subjunctive anymore. And that
will be it.
Have a nice day.
James Kibo Parry
>
BOFF! NEW EXTRA-HETEROSEXUAL KONTEXT-AWAY REMOVES THE NON-NAUGHTY PARTS!
> And by the way. WHEN I HAVE SEX, I AM NOT POSTING IN PUBLIC ABOUT IT.
ROMP! EXTRA-HETERO KONTEXT-AWAY POPS ITSELF BACK INTO ITS PROTECTIVE SHEATH!
> No matter who it is. So quit it with the betting pools and the theories.
> One day, far in the future, you'll read a post of mine and notice I'm
> not talking about certain things in the subjunctive anymore. And that
> will be it.
Don't forget to promise to pay everyone on the Internet a thousand dollars
if you don't lose your virginity in private.
-- K.
WHENEVER I AM POSTING IN PUBLIC, I AM HAVING SEX IN PRIVATE.
Glenn Knickerbocker
>Nonsense! Being Allowed is like being Saved.
Oh, no. Are we going to get into another long, hostile argument about
Universal Salvation?
Wait. That wasn't here, that was at Presbytery. And I wasn't even there.
As Jim Carroll quoted William S. Burroughs quoting some Indian philosopher
or other . . . Nothing Is True.
James Kibo Parry
>
ZING! NEW EXTRA-VIRGIN KONTEXT-AWAY CLIPS OFF ALL BUT THE TIP OF THE ICEBERG!
> Wouldn't it be the coolest thing ever if I had my first time on the
> day that Bob Hope died?
SWISH! NEW yadda yadda stuff.
Oh no! I've worn out Kontext-Away! And I was all set to say something like
"Yeah, I hear he does have a weak heart, and I'm sure it would explode if
he heard that Nick Bensema stopped complaining about having a virginity
to lose, and especially if Nick lost it in front of him, and/or to him,"
but I've got to run out to the store and buy a new Kontext-Away.
You can buy a Kontext-Away at that store next to the one that sells virginities.
-- K.
NEW AEROSOL VIRGINITY!
Just spray it on anyone and they
turn back into a virgin! WARNING:
NOT FOR USE ON PEOPLE WHO ARE
ALREADY VIRGINS. MAY ATTRACT UNICORNS.
Jaffo
Avocado Avenger) wrote:
: At least, I hope there's no one sleazy enough on the group to try and
:seriously talk some freshman chyk into fucking someone on the newsgroup
:for stupid, selfish reasons.
Don't look at me! I was ready to pay for a hooker!
Jason Steiner
>
> At least, I hope there's no one sleazy enough on the group to try
> and seriously talk some freshman chyk into fucking someone on the
> newsgroup for stupid, selfish reasons.
Is there any other reason to fuck a freshman chyk? Anyone? Bueller?
jason
Nick Bensema
Jaffo <ja...@jaffo.com> wrote:
>On 17 Jan 2000 22:54:57 -0600, in alt.politics.jaffo , sta...@io.com (The
>
>: At least, I hope there's no one sleazy enough on the group to try and
>:seriously talk some freshman chyk into fucking someone on the newsgroup
>:for stupid, selfish reasons.
Right now, Beable von Polasm is wishing he hadn't sent her that e-mail.
>Don't look at me! I was ready to pay for a hooker!
The only thing worse than losing your virginity to a hooker is losing your
virginity to a hooker you didn't even pay for yourself.
The only thing worse than losing your virginity to a hooker that someone
else paid for, is losing your virginity to a hooker that someone else said
they'd pay for, but they took off in their car instead and now you're
alone with no money and an angry hooker and her pimp in an unclean hotel
room.
The only thing worse than that is those clips of "Baby Geniuses" I saw
on TV a week ago.
Joseph Michael Bay
>>Don't look at me! I was ready to pay for a hooker!
>The only thing worse than losing your virginity to a hooker is losing your
>virginity to a hooker you didn't even pay for yourself.
There is only one thing worse than losing one's virginity to a
hooker, and that is not losing one's virginity to a hooker.
--
Joseph M. Bay Boy Genius
Putting the "harm" in the "Molecular Pharmacology" since 1997
To vr, or niw tp ne -- thop is thi quesnot. Monkey Wrangler
"Good government is no substitute for self government" - M. Gandhi
E Teflon Piano
<ni...@fnord.io.com> wrote:
}And by the way. WHEN I HAVE SEX, I AM NOT POSTING IN PUBLIC ABOUT IT.
}No matter who it is. So quit it with the betting pools and the theories.
}One day, far in the future, you'll read a post of mine and notice I'm
}not talking about certain things in the subjunctive anymore. And that
}will be it.
Suddenly a brace of Saran-wrapped lubricated supermodels with hand
annotated copies of The Joy of Sex break down Nick's door and God goes:
"HAHAHA! Liar."
--
Institute for Misapplied Psychometry fellow E Teflon Piano is founder of the
Internet 'Lectronic Legal Society. Teflon is a mark owned by duPont. E is E
poly(TFE) Piano Enterprises' [dibs] for ironic hyperbole and elitist satire.
ŠE[dibs] 1994-1999
This line is to trigger the YA-NewsWatcher .sig-nanny
kip...@imap2.asu.edu
sta...@io.com (The Avocado Avenger) wrote:
> And a lot of people on the newsgroup think it's a teensy bit
childish to
> keep pushing any woman associated with Nick Bensema to fuck him just
to
> shut him the hell up. Sure, now you've got some little girl who
doesn't
> care what you say (and probably wants to
fit in and wouldn't dare say
> anything upsetting),. . .
> At least, I hope there's no one sleazy enough on the group to try
and
> seriously talk some freshman chyk into fucking someone on the
newsgroup
> for stupid, selfish reasons.
Hey, I can understand your feeling here. Stacia, from what I read of
your rapport with Nick, you seem to have a big sister/little brother
type thing where you want to protect him from getting hurt and guide him
from possibly stepping over the line.
Having said that, I am far from a little girl who needs protection or
one who worrys about saying something that would be "upsetting" and
would prevent me from "fitting in." I hang around on a lot of message
boards and newsgroups and regularly stick my neck out. IRL, I am quite a
loner who has learned to not derive my self-esteem from whether or not
other people like me.
I met Nick because he was hurt by something I posted and I wanted to
take him out and meet him because I'd rather be someone's friend than
someone's enemy. I learned that he and I are alike on many levels. I too
am a virgin, mostly because I like keeping people at a safe distance and
not letting anyone get too close to me. We talked about many things.
If anyone wants to speculate on when Nick is going to lose his
virginity, I suggest you do so after Nick meets someone who is not a
misanthropic loner with a soft spot in her heart for other loners. He's
not going to fuck me. And it's not because of him.
(BTW, Stacia -- I agree with what you said about discretion. Which
means, Mr. Benesma, that when we discuss oral sex in a movie theather,
we use sotto voce. ;-) Anything goes with me, kids. Don't be afraid to
offend m
Sent via Deja.com http://www.deja.com/
Before you buy.
Eddie Hi There!
<e...@The-Institute.firm> wrote:
> In article <860u1k$qpo$1...@hiram.io.com>, Nick Bensema
> <ni...@fnord.io.com> wrote:
> }And by the way. WHEN I HAVE SEX, I AM NOT POSTING IN PUBLIC
> ABOUT IT.
> }No matter who it is. So quit it with the betting pools and the
There are betting pools ?!(!)
> ŠE[dibs] 1994-1999
> This line is to trigger the YA-NewsWatcher .sig-nanny
..
I guess I'm glad nobody told me 'bout that.
(In another group, I'm trying to get Edmo Wollmann, my personal
on-fire-on-line James Bond of Astrology to give the some Lotto
insights. I am a SCORPIO RISING = PHOENIX with Mercury in Libra AND
the year was the Chinese Year of the Golden Crispy Chicken (which is
also the phoenix.) Anyway, forget about them pools! That is out of
integrity and you make your own luck etc etc. SNIP.
So, Nick, when was yours birthdata? Not that I'm solely looking on
this as a money-making scheme or anything!!!1!1!
I care, dude. I really, really, really, care.
Eddie "Hi There!" Lowther,
Off looking for compatabilityability chart thingies...hope he's a
fishy..what're those fishy things called again?
* Sent from RemarQ http://www.remarq.com The Internet's Discussion Network *
The fastest and easiest way to search and participate in Usenet - Free!
Bill Newcomb
> Hey, I'm trying to reassure the world that nothing is happening CLICK
> CLICK between me and her, and I bet she appreciates the effort. Maybe I
> should have used the word "plutonic" in every sentence to spell it out.
^^^^^^^^
Your Kink Is Not OK.
--
nu...@best.com | "When naked, a transaction is retried when
| bus time is available." --USB 1.1 Spec
Kyle Flood
>
> The only thing worse than losing your virginity to a hooker is losing your
> virginity to a hooker you didn't even pay for yourself.
>
> else paid for, is losing your virginity to a hooker that someone else said
> they'd pay for, but they took off in their car instead and now you're
> alone with no money and an angry hooker and her pimp in an unclean hotel
> room.
>
> The only thing worse than that is those clips of "Baby Geniuses" I saw
> on TV a week ago.
>
least three times. With three different hookers, and an angry pimp!
Wow.
Kyle
.
Nick Bensema
>I met Nick because he was hurt by something I posted and I wanted to
>take him out and meet him because I'd rather be someone's friend than
>someone's enemy. I learned that he and I are alike on many levels. I too
>am a virgin, mostly because I like keeping people at a safe distance and
>not letting anyone get too close to me. We talked about many things.
Hot damn! Why don't you be the Official Vurgin of ARK for a few months
then? THen Jaffo can pay ME not to sleep with YOU.
>(BTW, Stacia -- I agree with what you said about discretion. Which
>means, Mr. Benesma, that when we discuss oral sex in a movie theather,
>we use sotto voce. ;-) Anything goes with me, kids. Don't be afraid to
>offend m
Yeah, sorry about that in the movie theater. My ears had adjusted and
I had no idea the movie's volume was set that low.
It's just that, being a loner as well, I haven't mastered the art of
controlling the volume of my voice as some people. That's the key
thing I worry about when I get home from any social occasion.
Shiro Akaishi
VROOM! Atomic powered feelings-insensitive half-sentence KONTEXT AWAY revs
up!
>I met Nick because he was hurt by something I posted and I wanted to
>take him out
SKREEEEE-CRASH! Razor-tyred high-grip KONTEXT AWAY gets carted off in a big
black ambulance!
Fire Engines All Day Long
Michael Bay) wrote:
> ni...@fnord.io.com (Nick Bensema) writes:
>
> >>Don't look at me! I was ready to pay for a hooker!
>
> >The only thing worse than losing your virginity to a hooker is losing your
> >virginity to a hooker you didn't even pay for yourself.
>
> There is only one thing worse than losing one's virginity to a
> hooker, and that is not losing one's virginity to a hooker.
Rousseau once paid a hooker to sing for him.
But that was just too weird, so he ended up giving her the D anyway.
And he was no virgin, anyway.
Robert "Man loves creating monsters... IWKWI... SITE" Caponi
--
T.W.I.D.N. € http://www.nr.infi.net/~tagutcow/twidn.html
$199 a month € http://www.mp3.com/199amonth
David O'Bedlam, Ersatz Haderach
Hash: SHA1
On Tue, 18 Jan 2000 kip...@imap2.asu.edu wrote:
[...she's a...]
> misanthropic loner with a soft spot in her heart for other loners.
Uh, hey there! Hello! I'm a misanthropic loner too! (Right, Stacia?)
Really, author-search www.deja.com for me and you'll see.
> He's not going to fuck me. And it's not because of him.
You mean you want to stay a virgin forever? Or what?
[...]
> when we discuss oral sex
ORAL SEX! My favorite subject! I'd discuss ORAL SEX with anyone!
Although there are very few people I'd actually *have* ORAL SEX
with: that point-&-giggle reaction I get makes me too inhibited.
(Though I'll swear it's because it's COLD in here.)
BTW, wow I wish "oral sex" had more syllables, like "Niagra Falls."
Slowly turning,
TheD.
- --
Waste money fast! => David, P.O. Box 236, Berkeley, CA 94704 U.S.A
..................................................................
Semi-obligatory quote: "I need an ax to break the ice." --D. Bowie
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David O'Bedlam, Ersatz Haderach
Hash: SHA1
On 17 Jan 2000, The Avocado Avenger got "cute":
[...]
> I hope there's no one sleazy enough on the group to try and
> seriously talk some freshman chyk into fucking someone on the
> newsgroup for stupid, selfish reasons.
Uh, no. At least not me. What *I'd* try to talk some freshwoman
into doing for "stupid, selfish" reasons would involve handing
me an awful lot of money. Even having ORAL SEX with me, however
stupid that may be, wouldn't qualify as THAT "selfish" 'cuz she
would earn at least my sincere gratitude (and maybe a 540 meg
IDE hard drive).
I'd want someone to fuck *Nick B.* so he can get the virginity-
losing thing over and done with, and I'd prefer that somebody
NICE (and honest, and reverent, and...) do it 'cuz Nick's never
done anything to me to make me want him hurt. (I'd do it myself
but I don't dig Nick quite enough to have a SEX CHANGE for him.)
Then, once he's passed that mark, he can decide from experience
whether or not it's all that neat-o. (As long as Nick remembers
that women, especially Avocado-Avenging ones, are vile and petty
gold-digging little cunts that he should never expect to behave
like *people* he'd probably tolerate heterosexuality adequately,
if heterosexuality is in fact his metier and milieu.)
By the way, IS there a UC chick around, freshman or otherwise,
who'd have any use for a 36-year-old freak's sincere gratitude
(and 540MB hard drive)? I swear I'm not TOO repulsive, really!
It's just that in real life I really *am* a shy, brokenhearted,
damn-near-penniless, misanthropic loner. (And I can PROVE it!)
*sniff*
TheDavid
P.S. Or maybe Stacia could email me a WAV file of her talking
about ORAL SEX. (Just remember to ENUNCIATE, damn you.)
- --
Waste money fast! => David, P.O. Box 236, Berkeley, CA 94704 U.S.A
..................................................................
Semi-obligatory quote: "I need an ax to break the ice." --D. Bowie
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Joseph Michael Bay
>In article <860u1k$qpo$1...@hiram.io.com>,
>Nick Bensema <ni...@fnord.io.com> wrote:
>> Hey, I'm trying to reassure the world that nothing is happening CLICK
>> CLICK between me and her, and I bet she appreciates the effort. Maybe I
>> should have used the word "plutonic" in every sentence to spell it out.
> ^^^^^^^^
>Your Kink Is Not OK.
Sex that involves Pluto: Not OK
Sex that involves Uranus: OK
Sex that involves Minnie Mouse: (the law has no interest)
Joseph Michael Bay
>> From: Nic Grabien <sf-...@dm.net>
>> Newsgroups: alt.online-service.genie
>> Subject: Genie TOD: 12/30/99 14:15 PST
>> The system still answers the dial-up, but there is no longer any content
>> available.
And this would differ from the internet in what way exactly?
Matt McIrvin
(James "Kibo" Parry) wrote:
>Nick Bensema (ni...@fnord.io.com) wrote:
>>
>
>ZING! NEW EXTRA-VIRGIN KONTEXT-AWAY CLIPS OFF ALL BUT THE TIP OF THE ICEBERG!
>
>> Wouldn't it be the coolest thing ever if I had my first time on the
>> day that Bob Hope died?
>
>SWISH! NEW yadda yadda stuff.
In other news, Paul Guertin was kind enough to inform me of my first-ever
confirmed ARK Mentioning Death Ray kill... of the GEnie on-line service, a
remote descendant of the system on which I first learned programming. I
posted about the slow dissolution of General Electric Information Services
Company on Dec. 29, and mentioned offhand that GEnie was probably defunct.
The next day, this appeared:
> From: Nic Grabien <sf-...@dm.net>
> Newsgroups: alt.online-service.genie
> Subject: Genie TOD: 12/30/99 14:15 PST
> Date: Thu, 30 Dec 1999 14:35:42 -0800
> Message-ID: <386BDE3E...@dm.net>
>
> Official Time-of-Death:
>
> 12/30/99 14:15 PST
>
> The system still answers the dial-up, but there is no longer any content
> available.
>
> Nic Grabien
> Managing Sysop
> GEnie SFRT1 & 4
--
Matt McIrvin http://world.std.com/~mmcirvin/
Sergey Bukhman
kip...@imap2.asu.edu wrote:
>
> I met Nick because he was hurt by something I posted and I wanted to
> take him out and meet him because I'd rather be someone's friend than
> someone's enemy.
Hey Stacia, apparently, there are a couple of things you could learn
from this "little girl" you arrogant pretentious BIG WOMAN.
XXX OOO
Hugs And Kisses
--
Your Bestest Friend Sergey
Sergey Bukhman
The Avocado Avenger wrote:
>
> At least, I hope there's no one sleazy enough on the group to try and
> seriously talk some freshman chyk into fucking someone on the newsgroup
> for stupid, selfish reasons.
> I hope.
But if there is, I just want you to know that I have COMPLETELY NO
PROBLEM WITH THAT!!! NONE WHATSOEVER!!!
--
Sergey
"Roses are red, blood is too. If you don't shut-up I'll put a 12inch
hole in you!!! I like cookies. My favorite color is black, but it used
to be blue. I'm watching tv as I write this. Turkey is my favorite kind
of lunch meat. Sometimes I sleep for more than 8 hours a night. I read
somewhere that's bad thing, should I ask my doctor about this problem?
Well... that's all I have to say, I wish I had a guestbook on my site."
-Mr. Hole
David DeLaney
>ni...@fnord.io.com (Nick Bensema) writes:
>>The only thing worse than losing your virginity to a hooker is losing your
>>virginity to a hooker you didn't even pay for yourself.
>
>There is only one thing worse than losing one's virginity to a
>hooker, and that is not losing one's virginity to a hooker.
...I wish you hadn't said that, Osc^H^H^HJoseph.
Dave "-technically- still a virgin" DeLaney
--
\/David DeLaney posting from d...@vic.com "It's not the pot that grows the flower
It's not the clock that slows the hour The definition's plain for anyone to see
Love is all it takes to make a family" - R&P. VISUALIZE HAPPYNET VRbeable<BLINK>
http://panacea.phys.utk.edu/~dbd/ - net.legends FAQ/ I WUV you in all CAPS! --K.
James Kibo Parry
> > CLICK between me and her, and I bet she appreciates the effort. Maybe I
> > should have used the word "plutonic" in every sentence to spell it out.
> ^^^^^^^^
> Your Kink Is Not OK.
Please stop making fun of Archimedes Plutonium just because he's
totally helpless and mentally impaired and really sexy. Thank you.
-- K.
Making the Internet a happier
and less sexy place since 1987.
James Kibo Parry
>
> In other news, Paul Guertin was kind enough to inform me of my first-ever
> confirmed ARK Mentioning Death Ray kill... of the GEnie on-line service, a
> remote descendant of the system on which I first learned programming. I
> posted about the slow dissolution of General Electric Information Services
> Company on Dec. 29, and mentioned offhand that GEnie was probably defunct.
-> Eventually PCs came along and GEISCO got flattened.
-> They managed to dust themselves off a little later
-> and turn into an online service (GEnie), but that is,
-> I think, gone now.
-- Matt McIrvin, article dated "Wed, 29 Dec 1999 04:07:56 GMT"
> The next day, this appeared:
>
> > From: Nic Grabien <sf-...@dm.net>
> > Newsgroups: alt.online-service.genie
> > Subject: Genie TOD: 12/30/99 14:15 PST
> > Date: Thu, 30 Dec 1999 14:35:42 -0800
> > Message-ID: <386BDE3E...@dm.net>
> >
> > Official Time-of-Death:
> >
> > 12/30/99 14:15 PST
> >
> > The system still answers the dial-up, but there is no longer any content
> > available.
Wait... when did GEnie add the content? I don't remember it having
anything more intense than 40-column-wide numbered menus, and lord knows
you can't pack anything meaningful into 40 columns.
beable beable beable beable
beable beable beable beable
beable beable beable beable <---------------------- see?
beable beable beable beable
beable beable beable beable
What I miss most about GEnie is its radical support for *both* kinds of
terminals -- General Electric TermiNets *and* "dumb" terminals. Also it
saved bandwidth by sticking with half-duplex for many years after everyone
else had gone to echoing characters so you could actually backspace.
It did have really good security, though. After you typed your name
and password on the same line of your TermiNet, it would back up over
them and type a row of asterisks *and* then type a row of pound signs.
The Soviets were never able to crack that!
-- K.
GEnie is like CompuServe would
have been if it had been BIX
minus Delphi. Times the opposite
of Plato.
robert lindsay
>>>The Chyk With the Worst Name in the World <kip...@imap2.asu.edu> wrote:
>>>:On Sat, 15 Jan 2000, Brian Chase wrote:
>>>:
>>>:> I suggest you take him out, slap him around a bit, and jump his bones.
>>>:
>>>:Oh, sure, "Brian Chase." Nice pseudonym, Nick ;-)
>
> This sentence amuses me on so many levels ... about six, to be exact.
>
>>>Trust me when I say a LOT of people in this newsgroup endorse Brian's
>>>suggestion.
>
> And a lot of people on the newsgroup think it's a teensy bit childish to
>keep pushing any woman associated with Nick Bensema to fuck him just to
>shut him the hell up. Sure, now you've got some little girl who doesn't
>care what you say (and probably wants to fit in and wouldn't dare say
>comments for the rest of your damned life about "Hey, have you slept with
>Nick yet? C'mon, sleep with Nick already! Maybe we can get that other
>chyk to sleep with Nick! Have you heard if Nick has slept with anyone
>yet?" Even then, they're mostly joking, or riffing on a meme, and not
>actually endorsing any suggestion.
I disagree. You see. Once nick gets laid then all the other desperate
lonely nerdy type MOVE UP A NOTCH! Sure Nick's got the record now at
20 some odd years, but once we get him out of the way, the bar gets
much close to those who've been without it in the second clinton term.
> At least, I hope there's no one sleazy enough on the group to try and
>seriously talk some freshman chyk into fucking someone on the newsgroup
>for stupid, selfish reasons.
> I hope.
As opposed to all the other *real life* bad reasons freshman chyks
have sex, not the least of which is they get trashed at a a frat party?
>>Not that it matters, though. I've kind of been trying, over the last
>>month, not to obsess about sex. Not until I get this whole job thing
>>under control.
>
>>And for that reason, I've been trying to lay the groundwork for a nice
>>comfortable friendship. Because I only have one or two friends left in
>>Phoenix that I'm still in touch with, and I'd like to make a new one
>>before I get a job somewhere and all my new friends will have to come
>>from there. And because I'm just not ready for romance at this
>>time. And furthermore, because there's a tiny chance I might just
>>relocate out of Phoenix to earn my living, and it would suck if Stace
>>and I fell totally in lurrv and then I had to just go away.
>
> Jesus. Is anyone else completely and entirely fukken CREEPED OUT by
>this? I mean, "Stace" is RIGHT HERE on the group and you're telling
>thousands of readers about fucking her or not fucking her ... GAH! JUST
>FUKKEN GAH! There's this word, Nick, the word is "discretion", and you
>might consider it. Then again, maybe "Stace" doesn't care, and I should
>just killfile you all and stop the nightmares I'm having.
Creeped out? No. Now that you pointed it out though, you are right it
is kinda strange that someone is connecting his superego directly to
a RS-232 port and posting to USENET. Particularly about the person
reading the same group, but maybe it's some advanced meta-troll they
worked out in advance. At least that's what I'm telling myself to sleep
at night.
>>But, maybe in spring, when the weather starts to scorch again, if I'm
>>still living in Arizona and working here as well, if Stace hasn't been
>>COMPLETELY scared off by the giant "Please Fuck Nick" petition you've
>>been passing around, if we still see each other on a regular basis,
>>and if I've grown up enough, something just might happen.
>
> Somebody please tell me I'm imagining all this.
Well it showed up here too, so it real*8 anyway.
>>The only thought I'd like to give is the following:
>
>>Wouldn't it be the coolest thing ever if I had my first time on the
>>day that Bob Hope died?
>
> Please. Tell me this is a hallucination brought on by warm milk and
>antihistamines.
No, those usually involve Bob Dole and Viagra commercials. The ones they
show on the 'videodrone' channel.
--
Robert Lindsay, NASA - Goddard, Greenbelt MD rlin...@seadas.gsfc.nasa.gov
"This whole business of killing bugs to be cool on the Internet is Grace
Hopper's legacy." -J. "Kibo" Parry, USENET, Sep 24, 1999 Why not me?
#include <standard_disclaimer.h> 301-286-9958 ISTJ -REM
redz...@my-deja.com
"'David O'Bedlam, Ersatz Haderach'" <thed...@tsoft.com> wrote:
(As long as Nick remembers
> that women, especially Avocado-Avenging ones, are vile and petty
> gold-digging little cunts that he should never expect to behave
> like *people* he'd probably tolerate heterosexuality adequately,
> if heterosexuality is in fact his metier and milieu.)
Hey! We gold-digging little cunts that don't behave like people don't
appreciate your super industrial-size BROAD BRUSH that you're painting
us with, Mr. Bitter Man.
> By the way, IS there a UC chick around, freshman or otherwise,
> who'd have any use for a 36-year-old freak's sincere gratitude
> (and 540MB hard drive)? I swear I'm not TOO repulsive, really!
> It's just that in real life I really *am* a shy, brokenhearted,
> damn-near-penniless, misanthropic loner. (And I can PROVE it!)
You know, I almost would consider it, except that your name is David.
And that's Toothy the Wonder Reporter's name (my other X). And everyone
knows that Toothy not only is completely incapable of talking about
anything but his fabulous career and the blue mustang he's going to buy
some day, but his news sources are weak. So, bleah. But maybe if you
bring me cookies I'll reconsider.
I'm not after anyone's money either. Crikey, I HATE shopping.
red
Posting through Deja because my newsfeeds are STILL being held hostage.
(P!n3 blows
kip...@imap2.asu.edu
kip...@imap2.asu.edu
"'David O'Bedlam, Ersatz Haderach'" <thed...@tsoft.com> wrote:
> You mean you want to stay a virgin forever? Or what?
Hmmm. I really haven't decided this yet. On the one hand, it would be
cool to be an old virgin in a freaky, Dominique Francon "no one is good
enough" sort of way. Imagine what they'd say at the funeral.
On the other hand, if by some accident I find someone who I don't
totally loathe and I'd want to have sex with, I guess I'd have to do it
just to say I tried it.
Pros, cons anyone? Should I do it, or is it just not worth it? Help me
decide.
Carlos Froggy
: Jesus. Is anyone else completely and entirely fukken CREEPED OUT by
: this?
Not completely (5+ years in ARK has somewhat numbed me to this)
but to a good extent.
: I mean, "Stace" is RIGHT HERE on the group and you're telling
: thousands of readers about fucking her or not fucking her ... GAH! JUST
: FUKKEN GAH!
Indeed.
: There's this word, Nick, the word is "discretion", and you
: might consider it.
I heartily endorse this product, service, or event.
Really.
-- F.
* Fro...@neosoft.com ** "The Information Super-Frog" [dibs] *
http://www.angelfire.com/la/carlosmay/
Carlos Froggy
: Hey, I'm trying to reassure the world that nothing is happening CLICK
: CLICK between me and her,
Why do you think the world needs reassuring one way or another?
: and I bet she appreciates the effort.
Did you ask her in advance about posting this?
: Maybe I
: should have used the word "plutonic" in every sentence to spell it out.
Troll, misspelling, or are you really in hell?
[...]
: And by the way. WHEN I HAVE SEX, I AM NOT POSTING IN PUBLIC ABOUT IT.
: One day, far in the future, you'll read a post of mine and notice I'm
: not talking about certain things in the subjunctive anymore. And that
: will be it.
Or else we'll notice because Nick Bensema is suddenly posting stuff
other than angsting about not getting laid.
Sheesh,
Carlos Froggy
: "'David O'Bedlam, Ersatz Haderach'" <thed...@tsoft.com> wrote:
Dear red: This is what killfiles are for. HTH. Really.
:> You mean you want to stay a virgin forever? Or what?
: Hmmm. I really haven't decided this yet. On the one hand, it would be
: cool to be an old virgin in a freaky, Dominique Francon "no one is good
: enough" sort of way. Imagine what they'd say at the funeral.
: On the other hand, if by some accident I find someone who I don't
: totally loathe and I'd want to have sex with, I guess I'd have to do it
: just to say I tried it.
So, how long has the line gotten since you've posted this?
: Pros, cons anyone? Should I do it, or is it just not worth it? Help me
: decide.
I heartily endorse this.... Oh, *YOU* know....
Jim Vandewalker
Michael Bay) wrote:
{
{ Sex that involves Pluto: Not OK
{ Sex that involves Uranus: OK
{
{ Sex that involves Minnie Mouse: (the law has no interest)
I heard Minnie Mouse was crazy.
--
Jim the Dead Guy
Kyle Flood
>In article <Pine.BSF.4.10.100011...@shell.tsoft.com>,
> "'David O'Bedlam, Ersatz Haderach'" <thed...@tsoft.com> wrote:
>
> (As long as Nick remembers
>> that women, especially Avocado-Avenging ones, are vile and petty
>> gold-digging little cunts that he should never expect to behave
>> like *people* he'd probably tolerate heterosexuality adequately,
>> if heterosexuality is in fact his metier and milieu.)
>
>Hey! We gold-digging little cunts that don't behave like people don't
>appreciate your super industrial-size BROAD BRUSH that you're painting
ITYM "BROAD BUSH"
>> By the way, IS there a UC chick around, freshman or otherwise,
>> who'd have any use for a 36-year-old freak's sincere gratitude
>> (and 540MB hard drive)? I swear I'm not TOO repulsive, really!
>> It's just that in real life I really *am* a shy, brokenhearted,
>> damn-near-penniless, misanthropic loner. (And I can PROVE it!)
>
>You know, I almost would consider it, except that your name is David.
>And that's Toothy the Wonder Reporter's name (my other X). And everyone
Boy, am I glad Leanne had never met an asshole named Kyle before she
met me. I mean, not that I'm the first asshole named Kyle she's
met...err or that I'm even an asshole at all. Damn. Never mind.
Kyle
.
Shiro Akaishi
<863ln2$d...@epic14.Stanford.EDU>:
>Sex that involves Pluto: Not OK
>Sex that involves Uranus: OK
I could convince you otherwise but it would require a GIF and or several
assorted JPEGs.
Chris McGonnell
Shiro Akaishi wrote...
> boing boing
Gerald Mc
--
Chris McG.
Harming humanity since 1951
"Dude, you need a new .sig" -- The Avocado Avenger
Nick Bensema
>In article <Pine.BSF.4.10.100011...@shell.tsoft.com>,
> "'David O'Bedlam, Ersatz Haderach'" <thed...@tsoft.com> wrote:
>
>
>Hmmm. I really haven't decided this yet. On the one hand, it would be
>cool to be an old virgin in a freaky, Dominique Francon "no one is good
>enough" sort of way. Imagine what they'd say at the funeral.
Or you could be like that guy who lost his virginity at age 80.
But, good luck.
>On the other hand, if by some accident I find someone who I don't
>totally loathe and I'd want to have sex with, I guess I'd have to do it
>just to say I tried it.
"Just to say I tried it." Well, if you're that enthusiastic about it...
>Pros, cons anyone? Should I do it, or is it just not worth it? Help me
>decide.
I'm listening too, see, so if you want to talk me into an even more
monastic lifestyle than that which I already lead, now's the time.
Nick Bensema
Carlos "Froggy" May <fro...@neosoft.com> wrote:
>Nick Bensema <ni...@fnord.io.com> wrote:
>
>: Hey, I'm trying to reassure the world that nothing is happening CLICK
>: CLICK between me and her,
>
>Why do you think the world needs reassuring one way or another?
So that Jaffo and the Nick Fan Club don't get all "GO NICK! GO NICK!
GO NICK! GO NICK!" on me.
>: and I bet she appreciates the effort.
>
>Did you ask her in advance about posting this?
We've planned out this course of events for the next two months.
Everything's right on schedule.
>: Maybe I
>: should have used the word "plutonic" in every sentence to spell it out.
>
>Troll, misspelling, or are you really in hell?
Misspelling. SHIT! I must forfeit my spelling bee trophies now!
>[...]
>: And by the way. WHEN I HAVE SEX, I AM NOT POSTING IN PUBLIC ABOUT IT.
>
>Or else we'll notice because Nick Bensema is suddenly posting stuff
>other than angsting about not getting laid.
I'm going to have to open up my own ARKive of posts where the topic at
hand was not my sex life.
And re-read that sentence I wrote in all caps up there, after "And by
the way." Do you realize how ashamed I am that I actually had to declare
in public that I would not immediately brag about my first conquest?
Do you realize how even MORE ashemed I am that I've actually taken ARK
seriously enough that I even care?
It makes me want to go out and have sex JUST so that I can NOT tell
ANYONE.
Watson Aname
> The Avocado Avenger <sta...@io.com> wrote:
{{{ SNAP! }}}
>> Jesus. Is anyone else completely and entirely fukken CREEPED OUT by
>> this? I mean, "Stace" is RIGHT HERE on the group and you're telling
>> thousands of readers about fucking her or not fucking her ... GAH!
>> JUST FUKKEN GAH! There's this word, Nick, the word is "discretion",
>> and you might consider it. Then again, maybe "Stace" doesn't care,
>> and I should just killfile you all and stop the nightmares I'm having.
>
> Creeped out? No. Now that you pointed it out though, you are right it
> is kinda strange that someone is connecting his superego directly to
> a RS-232 port and posting to USENET. Particularly about the person
> reading the same group, but maybe it's some advanced meta-troll they
> worked out in advance. At least that's what I'm telling myself to sleep
> at night.
I have rarely seen a situation that so screamed out for a Closure, for
a Healing, for the generous application of Super-Glue® Epoxy Adhesive.
For this reason I ask - nay, beg - SOMEONE, PLEASE FUCK NICK BENSEMA!
FUCK NICK BENSEMA... NOW!!!
Thank you, thank you very much.
Watson, who lost his virginity during a Southern Baptist Crusaders For
Christ Youthathon at the age of 15 and hasn't seen it since...
robert lindsay
>
>>virginity to a hooker you didn't even pay for yourself.
>
>There is only one thing worse than losing one's virginity to a
>hooker, and that is not losing one's virginity to a hooker.
You are stinky and I claim my copy of Neat Stuf #17.
Watson Aname
> Shiro Akaishi wrote...
>
>> boing boing
>
> Gerald Mc
Jesus! How old are YOU!?!
Watson, whose greatgrandmother spoke of a boy named Gerald McBoing Boing
Darla
> I'd want someone to fuck *Nick B.* ...
Well, all right. But just this once.
> ...women...are vile and petty
> gold-digging little cunts that ...never ...behave
> like *people* ...
> ...I really *am* a ...brokenhearted
> ...loner. ...
A belief in the former statement usually results in the truth of the latter.
Waaaaait a minute. Aren't you the guy with the PENIS NUBS
who shows his dick to his mother for evaluation?
Sounds like you've already got all the excitement you can handle, buddy,
IYKWIM.
Darla
--- IHNJH, IJLTS "Penis Nubs"
Kyle Flood
>In article <864pgm$bb0$1...@nnrp1.deja.com>, <kip...@imap2.asu.edu> wrote:
>
>>On the other hand, if by some accident I find someone who I don't
>>totally loathe and I'd want to have sex with, I guess I'd have to do it
>>just to say I tried it.
>
>"Just to say I tried it." Well, if you're that enthusiastic about it...
Jeez, Nick, don't you at least want to know if you fall into the
'Those I Totally Loathe' or 'Those I Just Don't Want To Have Sex With'
category?
>>Pros, cons anyone? Should I do it, or is it just not worth it? Help me
>>decide.
I haven't been disappointed so far, at least not with anyone other
than myself :) However, the 'Just to say I tried it' approach might
very well lead to serious disappointment.
>I'm listening too, see, so if you want to talk me into an even more
>monastic lifestyle than that which I already lead, now's the time.
Monastic lifestyle? Nah, although I hear they make good champagne.
Kyle
.
robert lindsay
>In article <Pine.BSF.4.10.100011...@shell.tsoft.com>,
>
> (As long as Nick remembers
>> that women, especially Avocado-Avenging ones, are vile and petty
>> gold-digging little cunts that he should never expect to behave
>> like *people* he'd probably tolerate heterosexuality adequately,
>> if heterosexuality is in fact his metier and milieu.)
>
>Hey! We gold-digging little cunts that don't behave like people don't
>appreciate your super industrial-size BROAD BRUSH that you're painting
Dear Red,
Mr. O'Bedlam is the fake 'bitter' man of ARK, and I am the person who
dibsied 'I"M NOT BITTER!" in the meme-draft of '99. SO if you want
quality BITTER, not fakety-fake lowercase bitter, trust me as a source
for all your bitter needs.
NOT THAT I"M BITTER OR ANYTHING!!! NOT ME!!!
Watson Aname
> "'David O'Bedlam, Ersatz Haderach'" <thed...@tsoft.com> wrote:
>
>> You mean you want to stay a virgin forever? Or what?
>
> Hmmm. I really haven't decided this yet. On the one hand, it would be
> cool to be an old virgin in a freaky, Dominique Francon "no one is good
> enough" sort of way. Imagine what they'd say at the funeral.
Those here gathered, ponder on our spiritual sister, kipper, even now,
here at the end of her days, a piece of the Great Puzzle - yet unlaid.
Watson
Dag Right-square-bracket-gren
> Dear Red,
> Mr. O'Bedlam is the fake 'bitter' man of ARK, and I am the person who
> dibsied 'I"M NOT BITTER!" in the meme-draft of '99. SO if you want
> quality BITTER, not fakety-fake lowercase bitter, trust me as a source
> for all your bitter needs.
> NOT THAT I"M BITTER OR ANYTHING!!! NOT ME!!!
So waht happened to your promising career in the movies? Or is that what
you're bitter about? Sorry! Not bitter!
--
Dag Agren <> d...@c3.cx <> http://www.abo.fi/~dagren/ <> Legalize oregano
"The more .sigs I'm in, the more pathetic I look! I mean cool!
Not pathetic! Pathetic would be bad!" - The Avocado Avenger
Leah Verre
KAPOW! ZOOM! JABBERWOCK! Kontext-Away pops out of a cardboard box
and says in a really bad Boston accent:
>SHIT! I must forfeit my bee now!
ZIP! BANG! BURLAX! Kontext-Away disappears into Tucker Smallwood's
neck and lurks.
robert lindsay
Matt McIrvin <mmci...@world.std.com> wrote:
>In article <kibo-18010...@192.168.1.201>, ki...@world.std.com>>ZING! NEW EXTRA-VIRGIN KONTEXT-AWAY CLIPS OFF ALL BUT THE TIP OF THE ICEBERG!
>>
>>> Wouldn't it be the coolest thing ever if I had my first time on the
>>> day that Bob Hope died?
>>
>
>In other news, Paul Guertin was kind enough to inform me of my first-ever
>confirmed ARK Mentioning Death Ray kill... of the GEnie on-line service, a
>remote descendant of the system on which I first learned programming. I
>posted about the slow dissolution of General Electric Information Services
>Company on Dec. 29, and mentioned offhand that GEnie was probably defunct.
>
>
>> From: Nic Grabien <sf-...@dm.net>
>> Newsgroups: alt.online-service.genie
>> Subject: Genie TOD: 12/30/99 14:15 PST
>> Date: Thu, 30 Dec 1999 14:35:42 -0800
>> Message-ID: <386BDE3E...@dm.net>
>>
>> Official Time-of-Death:
>>
>> 12/30/99 14:15 PST
>>
>> The system still answers the dial-up, but there is no longer any content
>> available.
>>
>> Managing Sysop
>> GEnie SFRT1 & 4
I never forgave Jim Dunnigan for hearding all the wargamers on to GEnie in
the early 90's just when private online services were starting to die out.
As a result those of use who had amiga (or USENET access) were stuck for
several more years while we had to wade through unthreaded GEnie transcripts
to find erratta. Nowdays of course in the modern world of tommorow,
we have to wade through unthreaded message on http://www.consimworld.com/
but at least we all have to suffer through that.
Apparently GEnie did something dumb around 94-95 to drive away it's
installed base of users. Does anybody know what happened? Or was it
just dilbert-level PHB in action?
Ben Wolfson
wrote:
>In article <863ln2$d...@epic14.Stanford.EDU>, jm...@Stanford.EDU (Joseph
>Michael Bay) wrote:
>{
>{ Sex that involves Pluto: Not OK
>{ Sex that involves Uranus: OK
>{
>{ Sex that involves Minnie Mouse: (the law has no interest)
>{
>
>I heard Minnie Mouse was crazy.
She'd have to be, considering what she does when Mickey's not around.
I mean, with a /horse/? (or whatever he is)
--
Barnabas T. Rumjuggler
Further-more, I have long since put the finishing touches on my own
official obituary, a 350-page tale of heart-rending loss which details,
among other things: my meteoric rise from Onion stringer to editor to
publisher; my assassination at the hands of lady-actress Ethel Barrymore's
jealous suitors; the thousand days of mourning which followed my death,
during which a cold rain fell constantly, no bird sang, and children were
born antlered and hooved; ...
-- T. Herman Zweibel
Joe McMahon
Nick Bensema <ni...@fnord.io.com> wrote:
>
>I'm going to have to open up my own ARKive of posts where the topic at
>hand was not my sex life.
>
--- Joe M.
The Avocado Avenger
> Watson, who lost his virginity during a Southern Baptist Crusaders For
> Christ Youthathon at the age of 15 and hasn't seen it since...
We have a Lost 'n' Found table at work, piled high with boxer shorts and
thermonuclear lunch bags. Want me to take a look for it there? It might
also be in your couch cushions, next to the remote control and $.34 in
lost change.
Stacia * The Avocado Avenger * Life is a tale told by an idiot;
http://www.io.com/~stacia/ * Full of sound and fury,
There is no guacamole anywhere. * Signifying nothing.
The Avocado Avenger
>Nick Bensema <ni...@fnord.io.com> wrote:
>>
>>I'm going to have to open up my own ARKive of posts where the topic at
>>hand was not my sex life.
>>
>Misspelling and Freudian slip in the same post, ladies and gents.
As Kibo is my witness, Joe McMahon, I cannot find a misplelleing in
Nick's post. HIBT? HIL?
David O'Bedlam, Ersatz Haderach
Hash: SHA1
redz...@my-deja.com escribeth to moi:
[...]
> Hey! We gold-digging little cunts that don't behave like
> people don't appreciate your super industrial-size BROAD
> BRUSH that you're painting us with, Mr. Bitter Man.
To flip it a proverb: If the shoe don't fit, don't wear it.
The
- --
Waste money fast! => David, P.O. Box 236, Berkeley, CA 94704 U.S.A
..................................................................
Semi-obligatory quote: "I need an ax to break the ice." --D. Bowie
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David O'Bedlam, Ersatz Haderach
Hash: SHA1
On Wed, 19 Jan 2000, Darla asketh me:
[...]
> Waaaaait a minute. Aren't you the guy with the PENIS NUBS
> who shows his dick to his mother for evaluation?
Nope. That was somebody else. I'm the one with the SUPER DUPER
MAGENTA ROD OF MANHOOD.
Of course we penis-havers know we're all the same, don't we.
(And womenfolk complain about "broad brushes", sheesh.)
The
- --
Waste money fast! => David, P.O. Box 236, Berkeley, CA 94704 U.S.A
..................................................................
Semi-obligatory quote: "I need an ax to break the ice." --D. Bowie
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kip...@imap2.asu.edu
b...@world.std.com (Brian Chase) wrote:
> > > I suggest you take him out, slap him around a bit, and jump his
bones.
> >
> > Oh, sure, "Brian Chase." Nice pseudonym, Nick ;-)
> >
> > Just kidding...
>
> That was close.
>
> FOR A MINUTE THERE, I THOUGHT _A GURL_ WAS MAYBE GONNA HURT MY
FEELINGS IN
> FRONT OF EVERYONE HERE IN A.R.K!
Can I jump *your* bones?
I saw your picture. Pouty lips drive me crazy.
r
Sent via Deja.com http://www.deja.com/
Before you buy.
Sergey Bukhman
kip...@imap2.asu.edu wrote:
>
> Pros, cons anyone? Should I do it, or is it just not worth it? Help me
> decide.
>
I've always thought that the greatest pro to having sex is the complete
absence of cons.
--
Sergey
...I guess I'm just weird that way.
Jaffo
Bensema) wrote:
:In article <3B9C708BFD17180E.1DC63863...@lp.airnews.net>,
:Carlos "Froggy" May <fro...@neosoft.com> wrote:
:>Nick Bensema <ni...@fnord.io.com> wrote:
:>
:>: Hey, I'm trying to reassure the world that nothing is happening CLICK
:>: CLICK between me and her,
:>
:>Why do you think the world needs reassuring one way or another?
:
:So that Jaffo and the Nick Fan Club don't get all "GO NICK! GO NICK!
:GO NICK! GO NICK!" on me.
<serious>
Nick, I am not some beer-swilling fratboy standing on the sidelines screaming,
"Go Nick Go!"
I make jokes about your sex life because:
A. You post about serious topics in a funny newsgroup.
B. It's funny.
Rest assured, if I was really *worried* about you, I wouldn't joke around like
this.
What I'm trying to say, what I've BEEN trying to say for five bloody years is
that you are NORMAL. You're not weird. You're not crazy. You're not
pathetic. You're just a normal, decent guy entering his 20's.
Even people who've had lots of sex by age 20 don't really UNDERSTAND IT. And
I'll wager most of them who did wish they'd waited.
In case you have any doubt about my real opinion, I would rather see you make
your first time dignified and special than see you rush into it because you
feel weird.
You're going to remember your first love for a long, long time, and the sex
won't be the most important memory.
I'm just going to keep saying this:
THERE'S NOTHING WRONG WITH YOU! Relax!
</serious>
the clown
Jaffo
--
College professors are like snakes and bugs. They're more scared of you
than you are of them. And they don't bite unless you provoke them.
Shiro Akaishi
>the clown
"One day our father said we couldn't keep the dead clown any more. So we
took him to the local McDonalds and left him in a stall. Dad put us on
report for a month, but I think it was worth it."
- Red Meat
Watson Aname
> Watson Aname <freehold@^snip!^visi.net.invalid> writes:
>
> > Watson, who lost his virginity during a Southern Baptist Crusaders For
> > Christ Youthathon at the age of 15 and hasn't seen it since...
>
> We have a Lost 'n' Found table at work, piled high with boxer shorts and
> thermonuclear lunch bags. Want me to take a look for it there? It might
> also be in your couch cushions, next to the remote control and $.34 in
> lost change.
I appreciate the offer of assistance, but, truth to tell, I've never
actually missed it enough to mount, uh... initiate a search for it.
All it ever seemed to do was make my pants not fit right and force me
to carry my books in front of me between classes.
Frankly, I'm glad it's gone. Stupid virginity.
Watson
David DeLaney
>mcm...@titan.oit.unc.edu (Joe McMahon) writes:
>>Nick Bensema <ni...@fnord.io.com> wrote:
>>>
>>>I'm going to have to open up my own ARKive of posts where the topic at
>>>hand was not my sex life.
>>>
>>Misspelling and Freudian slip in the same post, ladies and gents.
>
> As Kibo is my witness, Joe McMahon, I cannot find a misplelleing in
>Nick's post. HIBT? HIL?
Silly; he mispeled his -name-.
Dave "but you tell the kids today that, AND THEY DON'T BELIEVE YOU!" DeLaney
--
\/David DeLaney d...@panacea.phys.utk.edu "It's not the pot that grows the flower
It's not the clock that slows the hour The definition's plain for anyone to see
Love is all it takes to make a family" - R&P. VISUALIZE HAPPYNET VRbeable<BLINK>
http://panacea.phys.utk.edu/~dbd/ - net.legends FAQ/ I WUV you in all CAPS! --K.
Watson Aname
> mcm...@titan.oit.unc.edu (Joe McMahon) writes:
>> Nick Bensema <ni...@fnord.io.com> wrote:
>>
>>> I'm going to have to open up my own ARKive of posts where the topic
>>> at hand was not my sex life.
>>
>> Misspelling and Freudian slip in the same post, ladies and gents.
>
> As Kibo is my witness, Joe McMahon, I cannot find a misplelleing in
> Nick's post. HIBT? HIL?
I'd appreciate a judge's ruling on this. Does a mention of "Nick's
post" qualify as being on the topic of his sex life? I'd think so.
Watson
Richard E. Nickle
James "Kibo" Parry <ki...@world.std.com> wrote in message
news:kibo-19010...@192.168.1.201...
> Matt McIrvin (mmci...@world.std.com) wrote:
> >
> > In other news, Paul Guertin was kind enough to inform me of my
first-ever
> > confirmed ARK Mentioning Death Ray kill... of the GEnie on-line service,
a
> > remote descendant of the system on which I first learned programming. I
> > posted about the slow dissolution of General Electric Information
Services
> > Company on Dec. 29, and mentioned offhand that GEnie was probably
defunct.
[Replying to McIrvin's article quoted by Leader Kibo]
We use GEIS for EDI (and have several customers that
INSIST that we use it, despite our best efforts to
move off into the world of the post 1970s). We also
use it to connect to our benighted French owners for
certain types of financial file transfers.
Sad, really. I don't think they'll go out of
business because they charge by the byte, and we
pay enormous annual fees for these services. I think
we pay probably 10 times in dollars annually for our
9600bps connection to GEIS than we pay for 2 T1s to
two different ISPs.
Glenn Knickerbocker
wrote:
>BTW, wow I wish "oral sex" had more syllables, like "Niagra Falls."
MORE syllables? "Niagra" would appear to have FEWER syllables than
"Niagara" (or "Susquehanna," for that matter).
ŹR http://www.bestweb.net/~notr/dreams.poems.html
"They must be mad. They sing choruses in public!"
David DeLaney
Krishna! How young is your -greatgrandmother-?
Dave "McBoingBoing, Gerald, is animated, and is therefore almost certainly
younger than Mickey Mouse" DeLaney
--
\/David DeLaney posting from d...@vic.com "It's not the pot that grows the flower
David DeLaney
>It makes me want to go out and have sex JUST so that I can NOT tell ANYONE.
That's as good a reason as many, I guess.
Dave "I predict that that will be -rather- far from your mind, actually" DeLaney
PS: In my experience, it's no better or worse to wait for your first time
having sex than it isn't ... BUT once you finally do, if you were deliberately
delaying it you may kick yourself for postponing something that's just plain
such -fun- when done right...
Jaffo
(David DeLaney) wrote:
:
:PS: In my experience, it's no better or worse to wait for your first time
: having sex than it isn't ... BUT once you finally do, if you were deliberately
: delaying it you may kick yourself for postponing something that's just plain
: such -fun- when done right...
But Dave wouldn't know, because he's a virgin...
Jaffo <G>
E Teflon Piano
<ni...@fnord.io.com> wrote:
}I'm going to have to open up my own ARKive of posts where the topic at
}hand was not my sex life.
you mean: <i>hand</i>
HAWHAWHAW
--
Institute for Misapplied Psychometry fellow E Teflon Piano is founder of the
Internet 'Lectronic Legal Society. Teflon is a mark owned by duPont. E is E
poly(TFE) Piano Enterprises' [dibs] for ironic hyperbole and elitist satire.
ŠE[dibs] 1994-1999
This line is to trigger the YA-NewsWatcher .sig-nanny
David O'Bedlam, Ersatz Haderach
Hash: SHA1
On Thu, 20 Jan 2000, Glenn Knickerbocker wrote:
> On Tue, 18 Jan 2000 19:13:14 -0800, 'David O'Bedlam, Ersatz Haderach'
> wrote:
> >BTW, wow I wish "oral sex" had more syllables, like "Niagra Falls."
>
> MORE syllables? "Niagra" would appear to have FEWER syllables than
> "Niagara" (or "Susquehanna," for that matter).
OH, my spelling has been corrected. I was just remembering how it
was pronounced by Lou Costello, which then would be renderable as
"Niag'ra Falls."
And a great big hearty Rappahanock to you, fellow!
The
- --
Waste money fast! => David, P.O. Box 236, Berkeley, CA 94704 U.S.A
..................................................................
Semi-obligatory quote: "I need an ax to break the ice." --D. Bowie
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Bill Newcomb
Jim Vandewalker <jim...@gate.net> wrote:
> I heard Minnie Mouse was crazy.
No, that's the Kat. Ms. Mouse, she's just, well, petite is the polite
way to put it.
-B. (and her husband's Irish...)
--
nu...@best.com | "When naked, a transaction is retried when
| bus time is available." --USB 1.1 Spec
Joe McMahon
>>>
>>>I'm going to have to open up my own ARKive of posts where the topic at
>>>hand was not my sex life.
>>>
>
> As Kibo is my witness, Joe McMahon, I cannot find a misplelleing in
>Nick's post. HIBT? HIL?
Nick's acknowledged "plutonic". (Note: add to band names list.)
--- Joe M.