Poshnapping
Rose Marie Holt
Why would they want to try again??
Why would Geo W Bush want to bomb the sh*t out of Baghdad in order to
bring a better life to Bagdadians?
THe world is very confusing to me.
Best, Marie
Roger Bonine
wrote:
>Why would people want to kidnap Posh Spice?
>
>Why would they want to try again??
>
Why would we STOP them?
Mark Hill
> Why would people want to kidnap Posh Spice?
Kibo did it.
Tom Kraemer
> Kibo did it.
This gives us an opportunity to nominate a "Kibological Spice", even
though it's too far out of date to be anything like topical. "Why
bother?", you ask? Good question.
I'd nominate Stacia, just to piss her off. Not like that takes any
doing, mind you.
--
The quickest way to double your money is to fold it over and put it back
in your pocket.
Stacia
>Mark Hill <mh...@epicentre.net> wrote:
>> Rose Marie Holt wrote:
>>> Why would people want to kidnap Posh Spice?
>> Kibo did it.
>This gives us an opportunity to nominate a "Kibological Spice", even
>though it's too far out of date to be anything like topical. "Why
>bother?", you ask? Good question.
Didn't we already have a Spice, in the form of one of Motis' various
fictitious lives? Communist Spice, if I recall. As far as I'm concerned,
one Spice is more than enough.
Which brings us back to why anyone would want to kidnap a Spice.
There's nothing you can do with a Spice nowadays.
>I'd nominate Stacia, just to piss her off. Not like that takes any
>doing, mind you.
I'm all love and pansies, sweetie. Everyone knows that.
This post contains four lies, one of them lethal.
* * *
Stacia * sta...@world.std.com * http://world.std.com/~stacia/
"Perhaps it was the spring. And something in her eyes
that was much older than Manhattan, Kansas."
Joseph Michael Bay
>Why would people want to kidnap Posh Spice?
They wanted money. I'd have a completely different
reason, although I'd probably try to be charming instead.
>Why would they want to try again??
Also, why $1.56 million? How did they arrive at that
figure? Or did they want one million pounds, but
Reuters reported it in dollars?
>Why would Geo W Bush want to bomb the sh*t out of Baghdad in order to
>bring a better life to Bagdadians?
He wouldn't?
--
Joseph M. Bay Lamont Sanford Junior University
www.stanford.edu/~jmbay/ DO NOT PRESS
Lots42
>bring a better life to Bagdadians?
>
>THe world is very confusing to me.
>
>Best, Marie
>
>
He wants to explodiate Saddam so Saddam doesn't explodiate us.
Fair tradeoff, I say
--
To announce that there must be no criticism of the President, or that we are to
stand by the President, right or wrong, is not only unpatriotic and servile,
but is morally treasonable to the American public. (Theodore Roosevelt)
Lots42
> Which brings us back to why anyone would want to kidnap a Spice.
>There's nothing you can do with a Spice nowadays.
In Duke Nukem: Zero Hour you can beat the hell out of some mannequins dressed
up to look like the Spice Guuuurlz
talysman
> >Why would Geo W Bush want to bomb the sh*t out of Baghdad in order to
> >bring a better life to Bagdadians?
> >
> >THe world is very confusing to me.
> >
> >Best, Marie
> >
> >
>
> He wants to explodiate Saddam so Saddam doesn't explodiate us.
>
> Fair tradeoff, I say
so, are we as citizens allowed to add names to the list of people
who should be explodiated in such a way? I take it there's no
objective process to determine who goes on the list, since saddam
never said he was going to explodiate us and also we used to be
his friend.
if so, I say we should definitely add a bunch of boy bands to the
list. not ALL members of a boy band, just random selections, to
put the fear o' gawd into them.
I would suggest explodiating gurl bands, but gurls are cute, so
they get an automatic "GET OUT OF EXPLODIATIONS FREE" card.
we can also explodiate a few random non-famous people, too, just
to make life more exciting! imagine you are some middlemanager
in peoria... one sunday morning, there is a knock on your door!
MIDDLEMANAGER: who is it?
EXPLODIATER: it's the department of explodiations, sir.
we've come to detonate your buttocks.
Whose TITAN Elbow
berichtnieuws...news:aq4ot0$eqj$1...@news.Stanford.EDU:
> Rose Marie Holt <rmh...@mindspring.com> writes:
>
>>Why would people want to kidnap Posh Spice?
>
> They wanted money. I'd have a completely different
> reason, although I'd probably try to be charming instead.
I suppose you're keeping *Scary* Spice in your *lab* right now!? Halloween
is so five minutes ago already.
>>Why would they want to try again??
>
> Also, why $1.56 million? How did they arrive at that
> figure? Or did they want one million pounds, but
> Reuters reported it in dollars?
Because pounds are for counting fats and money is in dollars.
>>Why would Geo W Bush want to bomb the sh*t out of Baghdad in order to
>>bring a better life to Bagdadians?
>
> He wouldn't?
I was reading that as "Bagdikian" then realized that there was probably a
Media Monopole approaching my computar. No! It's just Klez again!
--
``Although xylitol has a relatively long organic chemical history, the
first half of this century was rather eventless from xylitol's point of
view...'' -- Professor Kauko K. Mäkinen
Glenn Knickerbocker
> MIDDLEMANAGER: who is it?
> EXPLODIATER: it's the department of explodiations, sir.
> we've come to detonate your buttocks.
Ouch. The image of Middlemanager as a parrot sitting home alone and
yelling repeatedly at the locked door rings all too true.
ŹR
Beable van Polasm
Who cares about that? The BBC reported that David Beckham drives
around in a bulletproof armour-plated Mercedes Benz which weighs
150000 tons!! ONE HUNDRED AND FIFTY THOUSAND TONS!! THAT'S A BIG
MERCEDES!
--
cheers
Beable van Polasm
Perl 6 will give you the big knob. -- Larry Wall
http://beable.com
Paula
It's the PLUMBER! I've COME to FIX the SINK!!!!
--
Paula
"It's tough when you get to that point in your life when
you have to admit that you will never be the man you once
thought you were." My Dad
talysman
> Glenn Knickerbocker <No...@bestweb.net> wrote:
>
> > talysman wrote:
> > > MIDDLEMANAGER: who is it?
> > > EXPLODIATER: it's the department of explodiations, sir.
> > > we've come to detonate your buttocks.
> >
> > Ouch. The image of Middlemanager as a parrot sitting home alone and
> > yelling repeatedly at the locked door rings all too true.
>
> It's the PLUMBER! I've COME to FIX the SINK!!!!
this would, of course, be accompanied by <wokka chikka> music.
DO NOT DOUBT ME! I was listening to fluffertrax this one time
and they had one porn theme that included a man saying "it's
the plumber, I've come to fix your pipes", followed by wokka
chikka music.
it should also be accompanied by posh snapping.
ok, now I know I'm tired, because now I am imagining the parrot
middlemanager is involved in PIRATE PORN.
"ARR! WE BE COMIN' TO KEELHAUL YER PIPES!"
<wokka yo ho!>
Glenn Knickerbocker
> mmmtob...@earthlink.net (Paula) writes:
> > It's the PLUMBER! I've COME to FIX the SINK!!!!
> this would, of course, be accompanied by <wokka chikka> music.
http://mywebpages.comcast.net/davechad/audio/It%27s_The_Plumber.mp3
My nephew was entirely baffled by this until I explained that it was a
parrot.
ŹR
Eb Oesch
> lot...@aol.comaol.com (Lots42) writes:
> > He wants to explodiate Saddam so Saddam doesn't explodiate us.
> >
> > Fair tradeoff, I say
>
> list
By "objective process", do mean a process objectively defined (for
Great Justice, ask the Reptoid Five, and then consult the 200 Wise Men
who happened to elect the representative of a totalitarian African
nation to their human rights commission?), or a process that is
objective, having dispensed of the vagaries of judge and jury in favor
of the Cogitractor _Endurance_ Truth Dispense-O-Mat/Coin-Operated
Punishment Vending Machine?
All decisions made by the _Endurance_ are solely based on classified
objective criteria, which may include the humidity level of its
operating environment and the number of stripped cogs on the drive
mechanism.
Paula
Kids these days! That was my mom's favorite Electric Company skit.
Glenn Knickerbocker
wrote:
>Kids these days! That was my mom's favorite Electric Company skit.
And I trust one frequently reenacted by the girls with you making a cameo
appearance at the end! My nephew grew up in Germanyland with nothing but
videotapes of Anne of Green Gables, and by the time he got back it was
all Reading Rainbow and junk. He didn't even know who Rita Moreno was,
or why we all loved Spiderman so much, or ANYTHING!
The Kaibo National Forest is in the Big Rock Candy Mountains.
ŹR http://users.bestweb.net/~notr/arkville.html --red
N. Gergen
> On Wed, 06 Nov 2002 03:55:35 GMT, mmmtob...@earthlink.net (Paula)
> wrote:
> >Kids these days! That was my mom's favorite Electric Company skit.
>
> And I trust one frequently reenacted by the girls with you making a cameo
> appearance at the end! My nephew grew up in Germanyland with nothing but
> videotapes of Anne of Green Gables, and by the time he got back it was
> all Reading Rainbow and junk. He didn't even know who Rita Moreno was,
> or why we all loved Spiderman so much, or ANYTHING!
Yeah, like, one day I turned around and one of the bedrocks of my
childhood TV watching experience was GONE! WHAT'S UP WITH THAT?
This post is all about how Sesame Street isn't as good as it useta be.
Plus: all about having a crush on one of them "3-2-1 Contact" chyx.
Rgds,
N. Gergen
--
"Broot, toot-toot!"
talysman
Yeardley Smith roxxxx!
I haven't determined the truth of sesame street's slip in
quality, since I haven't had a chance to check it out recently
(I hear it's on in the MORNING.)
I suspect modern educational programs are more like this:
MAN WEARING PITH HELMET: Today!
[1 second of car crashes]
WOMAN DRESSED AS SANTA: 1-2-3!
[3 seconds of flashing colors]
LITTLE GIRL IN TUTU AND FOOTBALL HELMET: Today!
PIKACHU: PIKA! PIKA!
MAN DRESSED AS BEEKEEPER: C! COOKIE!
[4-second clip of hip-hop]
FRANKENSTEIN'S MONSTER: Today!
[he is eaten by a bear]
BASKETBALL PLAYER: winners don't do drugs! much!
ROBOT: seven! seven! SEVEN!
[lion roars]
ANIMATED T-REX: Today!
Paula
> ger...@armory.com (N. Gergen) writes:
>
> > Glenn Knickerbocker <No...@bestweb.net> wrote:
> >
> > > On Wed, 06 Nov 2002 03:55:35 GMT, mmmtob...@earthlink.net (Paula)
> > > wrote:
> > > >Kids these days! That was my mom's favorite Electric Company skit.
> > >
> > > And I trust one frequently reenacted by the girls with you making a cameo
> > > appearance at the end! My nephew grew up in Germanyland with nothing but
> > > videotapes of Anne of Green Gables, and by the time he got back it was
> > > all Reading Rainbow and junk. He didn't even know who Rita Moreno was,
> > > or why we all loved Spiderman so much, or ANYTHING!
> >
> > Yeah, like, one day I turned around and one of the bedrocks of my
> > childhood TV watching experience was GONE! WHAT'S UP WITH THAT?
> >
> > This post is all about how Sesame Street isn't as good as it useta be.
> > Plus: all about having a crush on one of them "3-2-1 Contact" chyx.
>
> Yeardley Smith roxxxx!
>
> I haven't determined the truth of sesame street's slip in
> quality, since I haven't had a chance to check it out recently
> (I hear it's on in the MORNING.)
My kids didn't really like the PBS shows. They were more into Blue's
Clues and Dora the Explorer and stuff like that. I don't have anything
bad to say about either of those shows, but they ain't no Electric
Company. I do have bad things to say about Telletubbies. But I can't
scream "SHUT THE F*CK UP!!! because I am living on a family channel. I
could, however, control the remote.
> I suspect modern educational programs are more like this:
>
> MAN WEARING PITH HELMET: Today!
> [1 second of car crashes]
> WOMAN DRESSED AS SANTA: 1-2-3!
> [3 seconds of flashing colors]
> LITTLE GIRL IN TUTU AND FOOTBALL HELMET: Today!
> PIKACHU: PIKA! PIKA!
> MAN DRESSED AS BEEKEEPER: C! COOKIE!
> [4-second clip of hip-hop]
> FRANKENSTEIN'S MONSTER: Today!
> [he is eaten by a bear]
> BASKETBALL PLAYER: winners don't do drugs! much!
> ROBOT: seven! seven! SEVEN!
> [lion roars]
> ANIMATED T-REX: Today!
I think that's high school. Today!
Matt McIrvin
talysman <taly...@globalsurrealism.com> wrote:
> I suspect modern educational programs are more like this:
>
> MAN WEARING PITH HELMET: Today!
> [1 second of car crashes]
> WOMAN DRESSED AS SANTA: 1-2-3!
> [3 seconds of flashing colors]
> LITTLE GIRL IN TUTU AND FOOTBALL HELMET: Today!
> PIKACHU: PIKA! PIKA!
> MAN DRESSED AS BEEKEEPER: C! COOKIE!
> [4-second clip of hip-hop]
> FRANKENSTEIN'S MONSTER: Today!
> [he is eaten by a bear]
> BASKETBALL PLAYER: winners don't do drugs! much!
> ROBOT: seven! seven! SEVEN!
> [lion roars]
> ANIMATED T-REX: Today!
Actually, it's the opposite, because of a bunch of studies that said
that children who watched this kind of stuff immediately became
murderers.
Now almost everything for kids on PBS, especially for little children,
is exaggeratedly sweet and low-key; it's "Between the Lions" instead of
"The Electric Company," and the sketches on "Sesame Street" have been
made very long and uneventful.
On commercial TV, on the other hand, hyperkinesis still rules. (If
they're doing kids' programs at all-- I think the rules are laxer than
they used to be.)
--
Matt McIrvin http://world.std.com/~mmcirvin/
N. Gergen
Matt McIrvin <mmci...@world.std.com> wrote:
> In article <wkvg3ab...@globalsurrealism.com>,
> talysman <taly...@globalsurrealism.com> wrote:
>
> > I suspect modern educational programs are more like this:
[ ...short attention span theater... ]
> Actually, it's the opposite, because of a bunch of studies that said
> that children who watched this kind of stuff immediately became
> murderers.
Judging from today's Sesame Street, we're in for a bloodbath. I don't
think they'd even have a slot long enough for that trippy "1 2 3 4 5,
6 7 8 9 10, 11 TweEEEeeeEEEelve!" song that always reminded me of a
fever dream.
> Now almost everything for kids on PBS, especially for little children,
> is exaggeratedly sweet and low-key; it's "Between the Lions" instead of
> "The Electric Company," and the sketches on "Sesame Street" have been
> made very long and uneventful.
Can you explain "Plaza Sesamo" Mr. McIrvin, sir, please? Because
none of the Muppets are the same. Like, the grouch? Is neither green
NOR orange, but actually a tasteful Wedgewood blue. Plus: there are
COMMERCIALS! For Chuck E. Cheese EVEN!
But hey: LLAMAS!
This post has been brought to you by the letter Oo, spelled "U".
Rgds,
N. Gergen
--
"Dear Mr. Valenti,
I like your cheeks.
My home is made of adobe."
David DeLaney
>[ ...short attention span theater... ]
>
>Judging from today's Sesame Street, we're in for a bloodbath. I don't
>think they'd even have a slot long enough for that trippy "1 2 3 4 5,
>6 7 8 9 10, 11 TweEEEeeeEEEelve!" song that always reminded me of a
>fever dream.
Nnnrrr? They changed to duodecimal since my day? (Well, okay, they changed
to COLOR since my day?)
Dave "one-two-three-four-five-six-sev'n-eight-NIIIIINE-ten" DeLaney
--
\/David DeLaney posting from d...@vic.com "It's not the pot that grows the flower
It's not the clock that slows the hour The definition's plain for anyone to see
Love is all it takes to make a family" - R&P. VISUALIZE HAPPYNET VRbeable<BLINK>
http://www.vic.com/~dbd/ - net.legends FAQ & Magic / I WUV you in all CAPS! --K.
talysman
> N. Gergen <ger...@armory.com> wrote:
> >[ ...short attention span theater... ]
> >
> >Judging from today's Sesame Street, we're in for a bloodbath. I don't
> >think they'd even have a slot long enough for that trippy "1 2 3 4 5,
> >6 7 8 9 10, 11 TweEEEeeeEEEelve!" song that always reminded me of a
> >fever dream.
>
> Nnnrrr? They changed to duodecimal since my day? (Well, okay, they changed
> to COLOR since my day?)
>
> Dave "one-two-three-four-five-six-sev'n-eight-NIIIIINE-ten" DeLaney
different songs. the one that goes to ten -- the original
counting segment -- includes the spies in trenchcoats
flashing the little children. the one that goes to twelve
(which first appeared around the same time as snuffleupagus)
has a sort of funk-gospel sound to it and involves a lot
of pinball and LSD.
Pugg
say:
>N. Gergen <ger...@armory.com> wrote:
>>[ ...short attention span theater... ]
>>
>>Judging from today's Sesame Street, we're in for a bloodbath. I don't
>>think they'd even have a slot long enough for that trippy "1 2 3 4 5,
>>6 7 8 9 10, 11 TweEEEeeeEEEelve!" song that always reminded me of a
>>fever dream.
>
>Nnnrrr? They changed to duodecimal since my day? (Well, okay, they changed
>to COLOR since my day?)
As already pointed out, you're thinking of another, almost-as-trippy
song. It might have been a bit clearer had Mr. Gergen (ITIHRN) a)
mentioned that it included Peter Max's pinball machine and b) written
out the words as follows:
The Numbers One through Twelve
by Paul Shillinger, age 6 1/2
onetwothreefourfive
sixseveneightnineten
eleventwelve!
onetwothreefourfive
sixseveneightnineten
eleventwelve!
FOUR!
Four.
Fooooooour!
FOURRR!
onetwothreefourfive
sixseveneightnineten
eleventwelve!
onetwothreefourfive
sixseveneightnineten
elevenTwe-eh-eh-eh-eh-elve!!
>Dave "one-two-three-four-five-six-sev'n-eight-NIIIIINE-ten" DeLaney
If pressed, I'd say that the numbers one through twelve in the Pinball
song (with one notable exception at the end) are sung as sixteenth
notes, while the numbers one through ten in the perverse spy song
(again one one notable exception) are eighths.
Every music nerd in the group will now reply with WRONG WRONG WRONG.
pugg
--
talysman
> If pressed, I'd say that the numbers one through twelve in the Pinball
> song (with one notable exception at the end) are sung as sixteenth
> notes, while the numbers one through ten in the perverse spy song
> (again one one notable exception) are eighths.
>
> Every music nerd in the group will now reply with WRONG WRONG WRONG.
WORNG!
ok, so I don't actually qualify as a music nerd, since I only
took two music classes in college, and also since my performances
at the Northern California Experimental Music Festival usually
consist of william shattner screaming "grunt and despair" in
a tape loop over some white noise with alogrithmically-generated
music lines.
but!
I would count out the songs this way:
spy song: three eighth-note triplet groups (one for each syllable in
"ONE-two-three-FOUR-five-six-SE-ven-eight") followed by a quarter note
("NINE!") followed by either a whole note or a half-plus-rest ("TEN!")
pinball song: better rhythm than the spy song, really, kinda
syncopated, and thus harder to count, but DEFINITELY not even eighth
notes. assuming 4/4, it's something like:
eighth-note triplet ("ONE-two-three")
two quarter notess ("FOUR! five!")
triplet of two eighth-note rests and an eighth note ("six!")
next bar:
eighth-note triplet ("SE-ven-eight")
two quarter notess ("NINE! ten!")
triplet of two eighth-note rests and an eighth note ("ee!")
next bar:
triplet of two eighth-notes and a rest ("LE-ven!")
slurred half-note, two eighths, half-note, two eighths, half
("TWE-eh-eh-EH-eh-eh-ELVE!")
wacky.
