Re: Be Safe
Rob Cypher
>From 1998 until 2008 I worked in the internet industry chasing
>pedophiles, spammers, hackers and, after 2001, terrorists around the
>internet. Being exposed to photos or videos of babies being raped or
>people being beheaded, in the odd, sterile juxtaposition of office-
>world and without -really- being able to do anything about it creeps
>into your psyche and takes a toll. You'd walk into the coffee room or
>a meeting after seeing something like that, trying to shake it off,
>and some marketing geek would be upset about how much revenue we'll
>lose if we shut down a host of known terrorist sites, or somebody
>would make some flippant joke about how I got to look at porn while
>others work for a living... After awhile, you become suspicious of
>all of the people around you because any of them could be--might be--
>pedophiles. An image that haunts me is a close-up video of how a young
>man's mouth foams, and the way his eyes go, while his head is being
>hacked off on a public street. I will not describe the child
>pornography.
>
>In those days the drug related newsgroups, and especially the wisdom
>and kindess of gentlemen like ETF and the adventures of Misfit,
>Adamski and others, offered a sufficient distraction and source of
>information and leadership.
>
>People assign far too much importance to all of the wrong things.
>Often times, they bottle up their frustration and take it out on some
>forum somewhere. Others take it out on their families or co-workers.
>It becomes a habit, it diminishes one's character, and one doesn't
>have to engage in it to see it. It solves nothing and only furthers
>the erosion of civility.
>
>I stuck out Dilbert-world, 50 hours a week living like veal, because
>wisdom on a.d.h convinced me not to leave the career until I was
>financially able. Now, I work from home part of the day--I've got a
>three year old on my lap--and I fly, teach, study or work on my house
>with the rest. My household is happy, I shoot up regularly, I get
>great feedback from my hookers and dealers and we have yet to look
>back.
>
>So, when I came back to alt.drugs.hard it took a very short
>time to see the old patterns of bottled up frustration and abusive
>banter that you encounter on almost all public, and particularly
>usenet, forums. It's like a funk you get used to until you leave, but
>it's instantly recognizable when you come back. It's like a Star Trek
>convention. William Shatner can advise Trekkies to get a life, but at
>any Trek convention there's always going to be some group angrily
>jabbering at each other in Klingon.
>
>There are not bad people on this forum. Lucky, Jose, PVC, are not
>bad people, at least based on their behavior here. There are, to be
>sure, some very good people here. But the interpersonal hostility that
>flies around and, at present, seems to be flooding the only two
>discussions I've started recently, is not productive, positive or in
>any way helpful.
>
>It's clear that many of the most inspiring contributors have moved on
>and that these are not the forums they once were. In the meantime,
>while I was engaged in the runway incursion flamewars, I lost a very
>close relative and I am preparing to bury her on Sunday. I should have
>spent all this usenet time with her instead of indulging people's
>opinions of what kind of asshole I might be. When I said none of this
>matters, I meant it.
>
>None of what has been said about me here should matter to -anybody-,
>but it is clear that in defending myself--which is my right--I am
>contributing to a problem instead of devoting that time to drugs and
>drug discussion, which was the point of coming back here.
>
>Peace Boy, Shady Angel, Lucky, Mr. Gerbleberg and the guy that called
>us wankers: I am sorry my contribution caused the newsgroups to veer
>off topic, and I am partly to the blame. I hope the forum returns to
>what it used to be but it is clear that my presence does not help so I
>am unsubscribing from these forums immediately and permanently. I
>accept full responsibility for the distraction and chaos.
>
>It's a beautiful day out, and I intend to go be in it. I wish every
>one of you safety, success, health, and the best of luck.
>
>Rev Steady.
>(There's no door, and so you don't have to worry about my ass.)
True words of wisdom, Mr. Eddy. May you spread your message in peace.
--
Rob Cypher
http://robcypher.livejournal.com
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