Re: Tiger's Holiday Poem

[Al Smith]

On 12/18/2009 6:40 PM, Knifefight Afterdance wrote:
> �Twas the night of Thanksgiving
> And out of the house
> Came Tiger Woods flying,
> Chased by his spouse.
>
>
> She wielded a 9 iron
> And wasn�t too merry
> �cause a bimbo�s phone number
> Was on his Blackberry.
>
>
> He had been cheating
> On poor little Elin,
> And as each day went by
> Another whore came out squealin'
>
>
> He�d been on Holly, on Jamie,
> On Rachel, on Corey,
> On Joslyn, and Kaleeka.
> (TMZ had the story).
>
>
> From the top of the world
> To above the fold
> Tiger�s ever more sordid
> Tale it was told.
>
>
> With hostesses, waitresses
> He had lots of sex,
> And when he wasn�t hosin� �em
> He sent �em hot texts.
>
>
> He crashed his Caddie
> But didn�t call On-Star.
> He played �Spank me Daddy�
> With a skanky old porn star.
>
>
> He�s been naughty.
> With Santa, he hasn�t a chance,
> �cept a big lump of coal
> to match the lump in his pants.
>
>
> But despite all his crying
> And beggin' and pleadin�
> His wife went right out
> And bought a new house in Sweden .
>
>
> And I heard her exclaim
> As she packed up the Escalade
> �If you�re gonna get laid,
> Then, I�m gonna get paid!�
>
>
> Now, she�s not pouting;
> In fact, she�s of good cheer.
> Her Pre-nup made Christmas
> Come early this year!

Some funny verses. The meter limps in places. The author should have
found a way to fit in more whores' names. The count is up to 14 last
time I looked.

-Al-

-Al-