THE FEDERALIST - "The chief danger which threatens the influence and honor of the press is the tendency of its liberty to degenerate into license."
Unfrozen Caveman Politician Gore
The Conservative e-Journal of Record
* Veritas Vos Liberabit *
24 April 2002
Federalist No. 02-17
Wednesday Chronicle
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CONTENTS:
The Foundation
Insight
Upright
Editorial Exegesis
Dezinformatsia
Sociocrats
Village Idiots
Short Cuts
______----********O********----______
THE FOUNDATION
"The aggregate happiness of society, which is best promoted by
the practice of a virtuous policy, is, or ought to be, the end
of all government." --George Washington
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INSIGHT
"Wisdom comes alone, through suffering." --Aeschylus ++
"Nothing emboldens sin so much as mercy." --Shakespeare {}
"Self-respect is the root of discipline: The sense of dignity
grows with the ability to say no to oneself." --Abraham
Joshua Heschel ++ "Discipline yourself and others won't
have to." --John Wooden ++ "He that would govern others,
first should be the master of himself." --Philip Massinger {}
"Nearly all men can stand adversity, but if you want to test a
man's character, give him power." --Abraham Lincoln {} "Liberty
is the soul's right to breathe, and, when it cannot take a long
breath, laws are girdled too tight." --Henry Ward Beecher ++
"Liberty is the only thing you cannot have unless you are
willing to give it to others." --William Allen White ++ "It
is by risking life that freedom is obtained." --Frantz Fanon {}
"Take time to deliberate; but when the time for action arrives,
stop thinking and go in." --Andrew Jackson ++ "Never mistake
motion for action." --Ernest Hemingway {} "If I knew for a
certainty that a man was coming to my house with the conscious
design of doing me good, I should run for my life." --Henry David
Thoreau {} "The chief danger which threatens the influence and
honor of the press is the tendency of its liberty to degenerate
into license." --James A. Garfield ++ "Freedom of the press is
guaranteed only to those who own one." --Abbott Joseph Liebling {}
"The handwriting on the wall may be a forgery." --Ralph Hodgson
{} "A liberal is a man who will give away everything he doesn't
own." --Frank Dane ++ "We hang the petty thieves and appoint
the great ones to public office." --Aesop ++ "When there is
lack of honor in government, the morals of the whole people are
poisoned." --Herbert Hoover ++ "In the long-run every Government
is the exact symbol of its People, with their wisdom and unwisdom;
we have to say, Like People like Government." --Thomas Carlyle
++ "The short memories of the American voters is what keeps our
politicians in office." --Will Rogers
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UPRIGHT
"Sometimes organized conflict -- in a manner quite unlike other
natural tragedy -- shatters pretense, overturns old ideologies,
and in a blink of an eye makes what was once unthinkable very soon
rather pedestrian." --Victor Davis Hanson ++ "Amid the rubble and
confusion of war, the stench of the dead and wails of the living,
war offers a terrible clarity. Delusions crumble, propaganda can
be seen for what it is, and diplomatic gestures are only that --
a cover for what war will decide." --Paul Greenberg ++ "...[T]he
root cause of terrorism is totalitarianism." --Benjamin Netanyahu
++ "A terrorist is not equipped to negotiate. Only defeat will
persuade him. Moral clarity keeps the goal in focus." --Suzanne
Fields ++ "You can spare me the rebuttal that I am being
reflexively pro-Israel -- as if being reflexively inclined to favor
democracies and allies over crowds who burn American flags, who
blow up innocent children, and who have enthusiastically supported
the Nazis, the Soviets, and Saddam Hussein in their respective
struggles against the United States is something to be ashamed
of." --Jonah Goldberg {} "The problem with the United Nations
is that while democracy within nations is the best available form
of government, democracy among nations can be a moral disaster --
especially if some nations are not democracies." --Jonah Goldberg
{} "We have two choices: Either we change the way we live, or we
must change the way they live. We choose the latter." --Defense
Secretary Donald Rumsfeld {} "And protests about human dignity
are hard to swallow from a people whose leadership devalues
life to the point of sending its youth to their sacrificial
deaths." --David Limbaugh {} "...God has made the world as it
is and no human will can repeal its moral order." --Joseph Sobran
{} "Because we are made in the image of God, we can exercise
creativity in addressing environmental problems. Because we are
stewards of creation, we have an obligation to do so." --Charles
Colson {} "Is the New Morality itself the drug invented by
anti-Christians to bring about the assisted suicide of the
Christian West they always detested? Today's children are going
to find out." --Pat Buchanan ++ "We cannot be safe unless we
protect our constitutional rights and our borders." --Paul Craig
Roberts ++ "What chance of survival does a culture have when its
own elites actively seek its destruction?" --William S. Lind {}
"We never ask of any Big Brother program, 'How much is it going
to cost? When's it going to be said to have been successful?
How are we going to define whether or not it's successful, and
when are we going to end it?'" --Rush Limbaugh
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EDITORIAL EXEGESIS
"A sound policy in the [Middle East] region must begin with a
fundamental fact: Israel, despite what 'moderate' Arab states say,
is not the problem in the Middle East. Instead, the region's
violence and instability emanates chiefly from three major
countries, which represent three distinct ideologies with which
the United States is, broadly speaking, at war: the Baathist
fascism of Iraq; the Shiite radicalism of Iran; and the Sunni
radicalism of Saudi Arabia. All these regimes (along with Syria,
Iraq's junior partner in Baathism) must be confronted, although in
different ways. Only Iraq is amenable to an immediate military
solution. ...But to move on Iraq, the administration needs
a clean break from its current path. The Israeli-Palestinian
dispute will not be soluble until Palestinian society as a whole
eschews terrorism. Only then can the legitimate grievances of the
Palestinians be usefully addressed. That may be a long process,
possibly involving more Israeli incursions and the construction of
a security perimeter until a new Palestinian politics arrives.
There is no clever plan or negotiating gambit that the Bush
administration can come up with to short-circuit this process
-- the real peace process. ...If the administration takes this
stance, the last three weeks will begin to seem only an unfortunate
interlude in the broader war, and in fact may make it easier for
the administration to make the case to the world that it tried
its best to redeem the unredeemable Arafat. Then the U.S. can
begin to concentrate again on a benefit to the region that it
actually has the power to deliver -- the fall of the Baathist
regime in Iraq." --National Review
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DEZINFORMATSIA
This week's "Leftmedia Non Compos Mentis" Award: "Terrorism
experts also note that a society's propensity to get rattled by
suicide bomber attacks also contributes to the effectiveness of
such attacks." --ABC News Web site {} This week's "Leftmedia
Snuffery" Award: "[Bernard] Goldberg was, let's face it, not
a bright shining star in the firmament of CBS News. He usually
looked disheveled and bleary-eyed on the air. Goldberg was not
only a flop as a network correspondent, he's a lousy writer
besides." --Washington Post's Leftmedia "critic" Tom Shales,
responding to Goldberg's book, "Bias." **This of Goldberg, who
was kept on staff at CBS News for 27 years and presented six Emmy
awards for his "flop." {} "How does [George Bush] go up before
the American public on Earth Day...and say, 'No, I am a man who
is misjudged. I am a man who is for the environment,' when what he
wants to do is dig it up for natural resources?" --CNN's Carol Lin
______----********O********----______
SOCIOCRATS
This week's "Leftlogic Eco-Theology" Award goes to Albert Gore
for his Earth Day diatribe -- a few examples of which follow:
"Instead of ensuring that our water is clean to drink, they tried
to increase the amount of arsenic in our water." **Correction,
Al. No one has tried to increase the amount of arsenic in water.
++ "Current law has remained in place, whereas the legislation
you backed would have bankrupted countless communities through
hopelessly excessive new regulations. ... The Bush-Cheney
energy policies leave us at the mercy of a region that's racked
with violence and instability, now more than ever. Obviously,
we need to reduce our dependence on foreign oil, so that America
cannot be held hostage to global chaos and tin-horn tyrants like
Saddam Hussein." **Obviously, we can reduce our dependence
on foreign oil by drilling in ANWR, supporting new offshore
drilling and developing a variety of long-term energy solutions --
all part of the Bush energy policy but held hostage by Leftist
obstructionists in the Senate. ++ "Under the presidency of
George W. Bush, the environmental and energy policies of our
government are completely dominated by a group of current and
former oil and chemical company executives who are trying to
dismantle America's ability to force them to reduce the extremely
dangerous levels of pollution in the earth's atmosphere. The first
step was to withdraw from the agreement reached in Kyoto to begin
limiting worldwide emissions of greenhouse gases." **That would
be those gaseous emissions of carbon dioxide you are exhaling
with each blast.... ++ "Then the administration cancelled an
agreement requiring automobile companies to make the leap to
more fuel-efficient vehicles." **And that would be leaving to
free market choices of car buyers to drive fuel economy up. ++
"Other acts of sabotage are taking place behind the scenes,
[and] the largest polluters know their only hope for escaping
restrictions lies in promoting confusion about global warming."
**Only confusion promoters about globaloney are the eco-nuts like
Big Al. {} Some "Demo-Goguery": "A decade ago, our economy was
shrinking, as we struggled to emerge from a recession. We were
running record annual budget deficits, with no end in sight.
From 1980 to 1992, our national debt had quadrupled. Some people
feared we'd never get out of that fiscal hole. But we did. And we
did it the old-fashioned way. In 1993, we made a decision: No
more living beyond our means. No more borrow-and-spend and piling
up mountains of debts to leave to our children and grandchildren.
From that point on, we decided, everything we did had to fit into
a new framework of fiscal discipline." --Demo Senate Leader Tom
Daschle **What? Perhaps he actually means "tax bondage" rather
than "fiscal discipline."
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VILLAGE IDIOTS
This week's "Village Success Story": "...[The personal computer]
ecosystem depends in substantial part upon the continued health
of and improvements to Windows." --Microsoft head Bill Gates
testifying modestly about company software. **Hey, in that
"ecosystem," we think we know where the compost comes from! {}
Remember the golden age of the environmental movement with the
"Keep America Clean" campaign and its symbolic tragic-hero
"Iron Eyes Cody"? He was the single-tear-in-the-eye Indian
who experienced a sort of stoic breakdown in the commercials
every time whitie trashed up the place. Though he died in 1999,
Iron Eyes' immortal image was resurrected for AOL's Earth Day
cyberfest, with a helpful link to his CNN obituary noting his
Cherokee heritage. However, this Eco-Indian was the son of two
Italian immigrants, making him about as authentically Indian as
Roberto Benigni. It brings a tear to the eye. {} This week's
"Dumbing Down" Award: "In the animal rights movement, we don't
decorate our dogs; it lowers their self-esteem." --Linda Blair, of
"The Exorcist" movies {} From the "Village Academic Curriculum"
Files: At this year's graduation Michigan State University will
offer for the first time an optional Black Celebratory -- a
graduation ceremony exclusively for black students. One student,
Michael Cykowski (race unknown), raised the appropriate question in
a letter to the school paper: "What would happen if some students
tried to organize an all-white graduation? All hell would break
loose. They would be labeled bigots." The implication black
students' achievement in graduating is different -- as if they had
to try harder than their fellow students of other ethnicities --
should be just as offensive to the black community as a burning
cross or black-face comedy.
______----********O********----______
SHORT CUTS
"Updated proverbs: A journey of a thousand miles begins with a
metal detector and a strip search." --Bob Thaves in the comic
strip "Frank & Ernest" {} "From Mary McGrory in The Washington
Post to Mark Shields on CNN, a falafel curtain has descended
across our continent, transmogrifying the Arab aggressor into the
victim." --William Safire {} "Most public-opinion polls are like
Ouija boards. They're great fun as long as you don't pay them much
mind." --Wesley Pruden {} "Colin Powell -- back in the straddle
again." --Martin Schram ++ "The good book says blessed be the
peacemakers, not the process makers." --Tony Snow ++ "Once
[Yasser] Arafat was 'indispensable' to peace, now he is a naked
emperor whom the crowd confesses was without clothes all the time.
His own documents prove he is a terrorist and has broken almost
every agreement that the well meaning and naďve once put so much
faith in." --Victor Davis Hanson ++ "Fidel Castro will go to
work as an investment banker at Morgan Stanley before Yasser
Arafat signs a peace treaty." --David Brooks {} "...[M]aybe if
we applied the traditional courtesies of West Virginia politics
and agreed to rename Afghanistan Robert C. Byrdistan, he could
see his way to being supportive of the war effort for a couple
more months." --Mark Steyn ++ "Copping The Pork: Willie Sutton
robbed banks because/ That's where the money was,/ But if he
had heard/ Of Robert C. Byrd/ He'd have done what the Senator
does." --F.R Duplantier {} "This rigid, hostile, puritanical
control of little boys is now national policy. Very, very bad,
cops and robbers. It could be worse, though. Little boys might
play Cowboys and Injuns. (They certainly couldn't call it that.
Perhaps 'Genderless Animal Care Technicians and Preternaturally
Noble At-One-With-Nature Role Models' would do.)" --Fred Reed {}
"...Fifty management languages including jargon, weaselese and
mumble." --Scott Adams in the comic strip "Dilbert" ++ "How to
tell it's time to update your resume: [The CEO says] By the way,
if anyone asks, I wasn't here and have no idea how my company
operates ... OK?" --Wiley Miller in the comic strip "Non Sequitur"
Jay Leno.... As you know Robert Blake has been arrested. Today
he entered his initial plea of not guilty -- even O.J. said,
"Shut up!" .... The police said today that they have a very,
very solid case against Blake. They have a weapon, a suspect,
a motive, 900 pieces of evidence, over 35,000 documents, and
on top of it two witnesses that say Robert Blake asked them to
murder his wife. I don't know, you're going to have to have
a lot more than that to convince a jury here in L.A.! ....
Robert Blake will be tried by a jury of his peers -- 12 other
out of work actors. .... Today is Earth Day! Ben and Jerry's
gave out free ice cream today. Wow, Earth Day and ice cream, and
you thought Al Gore was happy before! .... News from the Middle
East is Colin Powell is back home. So I guess that's a success --
he's still alive! .... There's a new Osama bin Laden tape out.
I haven't seen it yet. Let me guess -- he's standing next to a
big rock threatening us. Am I close? .... Did you get your
taxes done? I had to file for an extension -- my accountant
is away with Kenneth Lay doing five to 10. .... The Internal
Revenue Service has mistakenly sent out over $30 million to black
people because of a slavery credit option. My question is how
old are these black people? If they're still around, give them
the credit, let them keep the credit! .... The pope has called
all the cardinals to Rome -- or, as the cardinals are calling it,
spring break! .... I'm glad these priests have to get on a plane
to go over there. Let these guys go through security and get
frisked and fondled, let them see how it feels.
David Letterman.... Top Unusual Things That Happen While Guarding
Coasts, read by members of the U.S. Coast Guard: Sometimes you
catch the lighthouse keeper making shadow puppets; As it turns
out, salt water plus oil spill equals delicious vinaigrette; Once
in a while, during a search-and-rescue, you find a cool-looking
seashell; When you're lost in the fog, friendly sea monsters help
you find your way; David Hasselhoff keeps showing up to see if
we need a hand; Kids are always crank-calling you in Morse Code;
There's nothing sweeter than stopping some snotty jerk driving
his yacht drunk; Once I found a piece of driftwood that sort
of looked like Freddie Prinze Jr.; Last week I made myself new
underpants out of seaweed; Pirates!
Argus Hamilton.... Osama bin Laden looked much younger in two
new videos released on Al-Jazeera last week. It's clear he's
no longer dangerous. One look at him and it's obvious he has
taken his best people off anthrax research and put them to work
making botox. .... Attorney General John Ashcroft issued a
terror warning Thursday for possible al-Qaeda attacks on East
Coast banks. This was the seventeenth terrorism alert issued by
his office. Eternal vigilance is the price of twenty-four hour
cable news. .... Palestinians seized hostages in Bethlehem's
Church of the Nativity.... The gunmen brushed off threats of
reprisals. Seizing hostages in the Mideast is a lot like killing
your wife in Los Angeles, it's nothing your lawyer can't handle.
.... Israel rejected a U.N. call for peacekeepers on the
West Bank.... That's because prospects for peace unexpectedly
improved that day. The arrest of Robert Blake offers the best
chance yet to get Geraldo Rivera to leave Jerusalem peacefully.
... If we start a celebrity murder trial in Los Angeles without
a slow speed car chase, the terrorists will have won. ... The
impact is being felt worldwide. Just last night, the al-Jazeera
TV network had to tell Osama bin Laden they'd try to fit him in
during Sports. .... Secretary of State Colin Powell admitted
... he could not pressure Arab leaders to get the PLO to halt
suicide bombings. They said they will stand behind Yasser Arafat.
They certainly won't live very long by standing in front of him.
.... Colin Powell toiled mightily for a week in a vain attempt
to get a cease-fire in the Mideast. Nobody expected him to return
with a peace agreement. He didn't want to come home empty-handed
but the Cairo Airport gift shop only sells shoe bombs. ....
U.S. Judge Robert Jones ruled against the Justice Department's
attempt to stop Oregon's assisted-suicide law. It was ruled a
medical decision. Americans don't want our medical decisions
made for us by judges, we want them made by accountants. .... Al
Gore wrote an editorial in the New York Times ... complaining that
global warming has caused women in Boston to wear bikinis in April.
This is just one more difference between Al Gore and Bill Clinton.
Al Gore thinks it's a problem.
(**) Denotes Editor's Comment
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GOOD NEWS! "Moreover thou shalt provide out of all the people
able men, such as fear God, men of truth, hating covetousness;
and place such over them, to be rulers of thousands, and rulers of
hundreds, rulers of fifties, and rulers of tens." (Exodus 18:21) ++
"Blessed is the nation whose God is the Lord...." (Psalm 33:12a) ++
"My people are destroyed for lack of knowledge: because thou hast
rejected knowledge, I will also reject thee, that thou shalt be
no priest to me: seeing thou hast forgotten the law of thy God,
I will also forget thy children." (Hosea 4:6) ++ "And ye shall
know the truth, and the truth shall make you free." (John 8:32) ++
"Now the Lord is that Spirit: and where the Spirit of the Lord
is, there is liberty." (2 Corinthians 3:17) ++ "For we wrestle
not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against
powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against
spiritual wickedness in high places. Wherefore take unto you
the whole armour of God, that ye may be able to withstand in the
evil day, and having done all, to stand." (Ephesians 6:12-13) ++
"Beware lest any man spoil you through philosophy and vain deceit,
after the tradition of men, after the rudiments of the world,
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