Which Right-wing Twit Will Win the Prize? (Adm. Boorda)
Paul H. Henry
This afternoon, Admiral Jeremy Michael Boorda, the nation's top Navy
officer, apparently turned a gun upon himself and pulled the trigger. No
note has been found that would help explain how this man came to such a
terrible point in his life that he felt suicide was the only way out, but
Boorda was scheduled to meet with a Newsweek reporter today to answer
charges that for years Boorda had worn a combat "V" decoration that he was
never officially awarded.
I think we're all in agreement that it's a damn shame that this happened.
But this is 1996, and no powerful man is allowed to end his own life
without being dug up and paraded around the room by drooling right-wing
twits.
That's why I'm announcing the ADMIRAL JEREMY BOORDA MEMORIAL RIGHT-WING
TWIT AWARD, to be awarded to the first demented conspirazoid in this or
another newsgroup who suggests that the Admiral was murdered by agents of
the Bill Clinton presidential administration.
THRILL! As they blow minor reporting discrepancies way out of proportion!
SCREAM! As they cite shadowy, nameless figures and obscure newsletters to
back themselves up!
WRITHE IN AGONY! As they contort logic to tie this incident in with all
the other murders they've made up!
Here are the rules:
--Admiral Boorda was declared dead at 2:30 p.m. Eastern Daylight Time on
Thursday, May 16, 1996. This time is designated Hour Zero.
--The prize will be awarded to the right-wing twit who posts the first
lunatic theory about Adm. Boorda being murdered, as verified by the
time-date stamp at the top of his post.
--After the first post is spotted, the poster will be declared Provisional
Winner for exactly one week, during which time anyone may find and submit
evidence of an earlier post on the subject, to counter the effects of
net.lag. After one week, a final winner will be declared.
--All participants must be ACTUAL RIGHT-WING TWITS. Liberals with a sense
of humor are ineligible for the award. Twits who are unknown to the judge
will have their old posts searched on Alta Vista and Deja News to
determine if they have displayed an acceptable level of twittiness in the
past. However, all Usenet readers are invited to e-mail the judge at
phe...@halcyon.com with the text of another person's potential winning
post.
--Any right-wing twit who suggests that (a) Adm. Boorda was having an
affair with Hillary Rodham Clinton or (b) the President himself pulled the
trigger will win the coveted Moron's Prize. The Moron's Prize will go to
all twits who make one of these two pronouncements, not just the one who
wins the main award.
--No money or other goods will be awarded to the winner. The only prize
will be worldwide recognition of the winning twit's absolute idiocy, along
with whatever ridicule may spring from such recognition.
--The decision of the judge--me--is final.
I am also announcing a special Spotter's Prize for Eternal Vigilance. The
Spotter's Prize will be awarded to the first liberal who e-mails me with a
correct guess as to the identity of the eventual winning twit. You all
know who the usual suspects are, so I shan't prejudice the results with my
own prediction. To win the Spotter's Prize, the contestant must submit a
post in this thread or an e-mail message to me at phe...@halcyon.com. The
post or message must be time-stamped EARLIER than the time-stamp of the
twit's winning post, for obvious reasons.
Ready? THEN GO GET 'EM, TWITS!
--
=============================================================================
_ (phe...@halcyon.com) ||Number of articles published since 1990 that
|_) ||mention the danger of standing between Phil
| aul H. Henry - Seattle, Wash.|| Gramm and a camera: 19. (_Harper's_, 1/96)
====================== http://www.halcyon.com/phenry/ =====================
Joseph Bowen
Paul H. Henry wrote:
> --All participants must be ACTUAL RIGHT-WING TWITS. Liberals with a sense
> of humor are ineligible for the award.
Then it is only fair you come up with a contest for all the other twits
to play.
--
Joseph Bowen jo...@mail.utexas.edu
University of Texas Graduate School of Business, Class of 1996
This .sig shortened to conserve internet resources.
Jim Kennemur
>Paul H. Henry wrote:
>
>> --All participants must be ACTUAL RIGHT-WING TWITS. Liberals with a sense
>> of humor are ineligible for the award.
>
>Then it is only fair you come up with a contest for all the other twits
>to play.
>
>Joseph Bowen
We have our first contestant and he drags his knuckles in Austin,
Texas.
Jim
=-=-=-=-=-=-==-=-=-==-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=
"We're driving them toward Clinton. We're going to
turn ourselves into a party of barefoot hillbillies
who go to revival meetings."
Rep. Peter T. King (R-N.Y.) on "solid working people."
=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=
Jeffrey S Linder
In article <phenry-1605...@blv-pm1-ip30.halcyon.com>,
Paul H. Henry <phe...@halcyon.com> wrote:
>I think we're all in agreement that it's a damn shame that this happened.
>But this is 1996, and no powerful man is allowed to end his own life
>without being dug up and paraded around the room by drooling right-wing
>twits.
>
You should be ashamed of yourself. The print is barely dry
on the announcement that the Admiral is dead and it is *YOU* who has
"dug" him up and "paraded" him around for your own partisan
purposes.
I used to think you were just a left-wing nut bitter about life
in general. Now it is obvious you are just a sad, pathetic little
man.
JSL
Andrew Hall
>>>>> Charles Held writes:
Charles> In article <phenry-1605...@blv-pm1-ip30.halcyon.com>,
Charles> phe...@halcyon.com (Paul H. Henry) wrote:
Charles> =This afternoon, Admiral Jeremy Michael Boorda, the nation's top Navy
Charles> =officer, apparently turned a gun upon himself and pulled the trigger.
Charles> A 5'6" man shooting himself in the chest with a shotgun. Try it sometime.
No thanks, but since Boorda is reported to have killed himself
with a .38 handgun, I do not see how this is relevant.
ah
Dan Thornsberry
Danny Sale wrote:
>
> >
> >That's why I'm announcing the ADMIRAL JEREMY BOORDA MEMORIAL RIGHT-WING
> >TWIT AWARD, to be awarded to the first demented conspirazoid in this or
> >another newsgroup who suggests that the Admiral was murdered by agents
> of
> >the Bill Clinton presidential administration.
>
> I have been led to believe that ANY incident where Klinton gets up there
> and talks about it, it is an incident he is fully responsible for.
> Tell me this.
> How many people does Klinton have to be associated with that commit
> suicide before you start questioning him? what is it now, 36? including
> many women that he had had connections with, Vince Foster, James
> Fratner, and many others.
> ANYONE that is associated with 30 or more people that have committed
> suicide I would question.
> May was predicted to be and WAS a great month of plane crashes.It was
> predicted on many shortwave radio broadcasts by conspiracy theorists
> playing tapes of a sermon given at the Church of Satan that May is the
> month of Human Sacrifice by Fire.It is the ONLY month where this is
> talked about it, because most of the Church of Satans idealology is
> nothing more than liberalism (do what feels good.) In otherwords,
> alot of America is practicing SATANISM.
> Big coincidence, huh.Lets see, and Klinton was up there talking about
> Jessica Dubroff, Ron Brown, Valuejet.
After you are done here, Mr. Sale, make sure you don't catch
Jerry Falwells weeney when you zip him back up.
--
-------------------------------------------------------
Have you noticed how the Contract on America parallels
the economy of Mexico? The GOP wants a low minimum wage
for cheap labor, less controls on polluters, they want
the poor to become poorer and the rich richer, they want
to cast the elderly, the disabled, and the weak into the
street, they want education to be only for the wealthy,
and Newt has shown they want us to cast a blind eye on
public officials being bribed. If you want your city to
look like Mexico City, vote republican.
==========================================================
| | The GOP wants more guns |
| Dan Thornsberry | |
|tbe...@computek.net | and less education!!! |
| | |
|==========================================================|
| The victors called the revolution a triumph of liberty; |
| but now and then liberty, in the slogans of the strong, |
| means freedom from restraint in the exploitation of the |
| weak. -Will Durant |
==========================================================
Star witness - A person who will enhance your position
when they testify.
Starr witness - A person you hire to perjure themselves.
--------------------------------------------------------
# 1 militiaman problem:
Government intrusion into their lives.
# 2 militiaman problem:
Cockroach infestation of their homes.
-------------------------------------------------------
James R. Olson, jr.
ch...@clt.mindspring.com (Charles Held) wrote:
->In article <phenry-1605...@blv-pm1-ip30.halcyon.com>,
-> phe...@halcyon.com (Paul H. Henry) wrote:
->=This afternoon, Admiral Jeremy Michael Boorda, the nation's top Navy
->=officer, apparently turned a gun upon himself and pulled the trigger.
->A 5'6" man shooting himself in the chest with a shotgun. Try it sometime.
Good point. I'm 5'10", so couldn't perform the experiment. My
roommate is 5'4", which we figured was close enough for extrapolation.
We used a Mossberg 500 with a pistol grip and a 20" barrel. Over the
course of 7 trials, he was unable to maintain contact of the muzzle to
his chest while pushing the trigger. Trials were suspeded at that
point due to complaints from the neighbors about the noise, and the
landlord about damage to the apartment. After I bail my roommate out,
we have arranged to borrow a Remington with an 18" barrel for further
trials.
Of course, for true experimental validity, we need to find out the
model of shotgun used in the Boorda case, and Boorda's armspan.
->=No
->=note has been found that would help explain how this man came to such a
->=terrible point in his life that he felt suicide was the only way out
->Actually there are "at least two" suicide notes. Apparently one was left over
->from Colby or Foster...
->=Liberals with a sense of humor are ineligible for the award.
-> ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
->You do realize that this is a null set, right?
I know, they're all to stoopid to get the joke.
->=Twits who are unknown to the judge
->=will have their old posts searched on Alta Vista and Deja News to
->=determine if they have displayed an acceptable level of twittiness in the
->=past.
->This disqualifies those who know how to prevent AV and DN from snagging their
->posts.
Heh, heh, good one. You sure told him! Maybe you'll get half the
prize!
JimmyO (watch out, I'm armed!)
Help to launch the future from
http://www.apollo-society.org/apollo
The Apollo Launch Pad
alb...@webcom.com
bshe...@88net.net wrote:
>
> In article <phenry-1605...@blv-pm1-ip30.halcyon.com>, phe...@halcyon.com says...
> >
> >This afternoon, Admiral Jeremy Michael Boorda, the nation's top Navy
> >note has been found that would help explain how this man came to such a
> >Boorda was scheduled to meet with a Newsweek reporter today to answer
> >charges that for years Boorda had worn a combat "V" decoration that he was
> >never officially awarded.
> >
> >But this is 1996, and no powerful man is allowed to end his own life
> >without being dug up and paraded around the room by drooling right-wing
> >twits.
> >
> >TWIT AWARD, to be awarded to the first demented conspirazoid in this or
> >another newsgroup who suggests that the Admiral was murdered by agents of
> >the Bill Clinton presidential administration.
> >
> >
> >SCREAM! As they cite shadowy, nameless figures and obscure newsletters to
> >back themselves up!
> >
> >WRITHE IN AGONY! As they contort logic to tie this incident in with all
> >the other murders they've made up!
> >
>
> Actually, it wasn't Klintler that got him, it was the only person who has
> past and present acquaintances turn up dead more often...JESSICA FLETCHER!
>
> I don't know anything about this incident, so I probably don't qualify
> for the award, exactly, but I will say this: If I see Slick or Mrs. F. in
> my driveway, I'm checking my insurance policy before I open my door, if
> you know what I mean.
>
> Does that make me a right-wing twit, or does that make you a left-wing
> meathead
>
> Bob
Clearly, it makes you a right wing twit.
While I usually just browse through here once a month for a chuckle or
two, your question feels deserving of an answer 8)
MRK
bshe...@88net.net
meathead who couldn't positively I.D. dogshit without tasting it then
asking the dog?
Hope we're still friends, and that you'll still take your share of my
paycheck,
Bob
>
>Ready? THEN GO GET 'EM, TWITS!
>
Aarf! {sniff}
Danny Sale
>
>That's why I'm announcing the ADMIRAL JEREMY BOORDA MEMORIAL RIGHT-WING
>TWIT AWARD, to be awarded to the first demented conspirazoid in this or
>another newsgroup who suggests that the Admiral was murdered by agents
of
>the Bill Clinton presidential administration.
Who are you working for?
Jim Kennemur
Danny Sale did NOT say:
>>That's why I'm announcing the ADMIRAL JEREMY BOORDA MEMORIAL RIGHT-WING
>>TWIT AWARD, to be awarded to the first demented conspirazoid in this or
>>another newsgroup who suggests that the Admiral was murdered by agents
>of the Bill Clinton presidential administration.
On 18 May 1996 00:46:40 GMT, ds...@jax.jaxnet.com (Danny Sale) wrote:
>Who are you working for?
>I have been led to believe that ANY incident where Klinton gets up there
>and talks about it, it is an incident he is fully responsible for.
This is one of your more logical assertions Danny. If the President
talks about it he did it???
>Tell me this.
>How many people does Klinton have to be associated with that commit
>suicide before you start questioning him? what is it now, 36? including
>many women that he had had connections with, Vince Foster, James
>Fratner, and many others.
Why our Grand Conspiracy is out. Let us hold Congressional hearings
and get to the bottom of all this. Oh. I forgot. We did. Nothing came
of it.
>ANYONE that is associated with 30 or more people that have committed
>suicide I would question.
Talked to David Koresh lately Danny?
>May was predicted to be and WAS a great month of plane crashes.It was
>predicted on many shortwave radio broadcasts by conspiracy theorists
>playing tapes of a sermon given at the Church of Satan that May is the
>month of Human Sacrifice by Fire.It is the ONLY month where this is
>talked about it, because most of the Church of Satans idealology is
>nothing more than liberalism (do what feels good.) In otherwords,
>alot of America is practicing SATANISM.
America is a hotbed of Satanism!!! Another one of our secrets is out
Oh Dark Leader! These American patriots are wayyyyyyy to smart for us!
>Big coincidence, huh.Lets see, and Klinton was up there talking about
>Jessica Dubroff, Ron Brown, Valuejet.
The President has also been talking about Bob Dole and all that has
happened to Old Bob is that he has quit his day job, lost his tie and
has made several bad fashion decisions.
Paul H. Henry
In article <4ni421$u...@mule2.mindspring.com>, ch...@clt.mindspring.com
(Charles Held) wrote:
> In article <phenry-1605...@blv-pm1-ip30.halcyon.com>,
> phe...@halcyon.com (Paul H. Henry) wrote:
> =This afternoon, Admiral Jeremy Michael Boorda, the nation's top Navy
> =officer, apparently turned a gun upon himself and pulled the trigger.
>
> A 5'6" man shooting himself in the chest with a shotgun. Try it sometime.
Why should I? Adm. Boorda did himself in with a .38 caliber handgun?
[...]
> =Twits who are unknown to the judge
> =will have their old posts searched on Alta Vista and Deja News to
> =determine if they have displayed an acceptable level of twittiness in the
> =past.
>
> This disqualifies those who know how to prevent AV and DN from snagging their
> posts.
True, but anyone who is so paranoid as to prevent his own posts from being
archived qualifies as a de facto right-wing twit and is therefore eligible
to win.
Paul H. Henry
In article <4nhsj8$e...@charm.magnus.acs.ohio-state.edu>,
jli...@magnus.acs.ohio-state.edu (Jeffrey S Linder) wrote:
> In article <phenry-1605...@blv-pm1-ip30.halcyon.com>,
> Paul H. Henry <phe...@halcyon.com> wrote:
>
> >I think we're all in agreement that it's a damn shame that this happened.
> >But this is 1996, and no powerful man is allowed to end his own life
> >without being dug up and paraded around the room by drooling right-wing
> >twits.
> >
>
>
> You should be ashamed of yourself. The print is barely dry
> on the announcement that the Admiral is dead and it is *YOU* who has
> "dug" him up and "paraded" him around for your own partisan
> purposes.
>
> I used to think you were just a left-wing nut bitter about life
> in general. Now it is obvious you are just a sad, pathetic little
> man.
Boo hoo hoo. I've been online for ten minutes this afternoon and I've
already seen half a dozen posts saying exactly what I predicted the
right-wing twits would say. Who's sad and pathetic now?
Nancy K
phe...@halcyon.com (Paul H. Henry) wrote:
<snip>
>--The decision of the judge--me--is final.
Why am I not surprised? Yes, your statement of elitism sounds so
very much like your totalitiarian hero Bill Clinton.
<snip>
Nancy K
-----------
If men use their liberty in such a way as to surrender their liberty,
are they thereafter any the less slaves? If people by a plebiscite
elect a man despot over them, do they remain free because the
despotism was of their own making?
- Herbert Spencer
The New Toryism, 1884
HENRY E. KILPATRICK JR.
Paul H. Henry (phe...@halcyon.com) wrote:
: In article <4ni421$u...@mule2.mindspring.com>, ch...@clt.mindspring.com
: (Charles Held) wrote:
: > =Twits who are unknown to the judge
: > =will have their old posts searched on Alta Vista and Deja News to
: > =determine if they have displayed an acceptable level of twittiness in the
: > =past.
: >
: > This disqualifies those who know how to prevent AV and DN from snagging their
: > posts.
: True, but anyone who is so paranoid as to prevent his own posts from being
: archived qualifies as a de facto right-wing twit and is therefore eligible
: to win.
Here we go, Paul. This came through my e-mail. Two twits for the price
of one. These twits may be unknown, but a matched pair should be worth
some kind of award.
From shg...@efn.orgSun May 19 17:26:13 1996
Date: Sun, 19 May 96 13:32:30 -0700
From: Stan & Hilde Giles <shg...@efn.org>
To: hkil...@osf1.gmu.edu
Subject: Clinton's well oiled...
I don't think the right wingers have any problem with making things slick
for willy.... He does very well for himself and by himself... Have you
wondered why there are so many suicides around slick willy???
--
Buddy K
James R. Olson, jr.
nan...@bga.com (Nancy K) wrote:
->phe...@halcyon.com (Paul H. Henry) wrote:
-><snip>
->>--The decision of the judge--me--is final.
-> Why am I not surprised? Yes, your statement of elitism sounds so
-> very much like your totalitiarian hero Bill Clinton.
Say, Nancy K, isn't the air a little thin way up there on that high
horse?
JimmyO
Jeffrey S Linder
In article <phenry-1805...@blv-pm0-ip28.halcyon.com>,
Paul H. Henry <phe...@halcyon.com> wrote:
>In article <4nhsj8$e...@charm.magnus.acs.ohio-state.edu>,
>jli...@magnus.acs.ohio-state.edu (Jeffrey S Linder) wrote:
>
>> In article <phenry-1605...@blv-pm1-ip30.halcyon.com>,
>> Paul H. Henry <phe...@halcyon.com> wrote:
>>
>> >I think we're all in agreement that it's a damn shame that this happened.
>> >But this is 1996, and no powerful man is allowed to end his own life
>> >without being dug up and paraded around the room by drooling right-wing
>> >twits.
>> >
>>
>>
>> You should be ashamed of yourself. The print is barely dry
>> on the announcement that the Admiral is dead and it is *YOU* who has
>> "dug" him up and "paraded" him around for your own partisan
>> purposes.
>>
>> I used to think you were just a left-wing nut bitter about life
>> in general. Now it is obvious you are just a sad, pathetic little
>> man.
>
>Boo hoo hoo. I've been online for ten minutes this afternoon and I've
>already seen half a dozen posts saying exactly what I predicted the
>right-wing twits would say. Who's sad and pathetic now?
>
You. BTW, whose was first to exploit his death for partisan gain?
Why, you, again!
JSL
Paul H. Henry
> phe...@halcyon.com (Paul H. Henry) wrote:
>
> <snip>
> >--The decision of the judge--me--is final.
>
> Why am I not surprised? Yes, your statement of elitism sounds so
> very much like your totalitiarian hero Bill Clinton.
Cope with it. You invent an award, you get to make the rules.
Paul H. Henry
As I'm sure most of you have noticed by now, the wires are full of eager
contestents for my Right-Wing Twit Prize. The prize, as you'll recall,
will go to the right-wing twit who posted the first brainless supposition
that suicidal Admiral Mike Boorda was done in by agents of the Clinton
administration.
Here, then, are the current top three that I have been made aware of. Time
listed is the number of hours the message was posted after 2:30 pm on
Thursday, May 16, when the admiral was pronounced dead.
-=-=-
Coming in THIRD, at 29 hours and 17 minutes, is............ notorious
net.nazi MILTON KLEIM!!
From: bb...@FreeNet.Carleton.CA (Milton Kleim)
Newsgroups: alt.politics.clinton,talk.politics.misc
Subject: Was Admiral Boorda "Fosterized"?
Date: 17 May 1996 23:47:51 GMT
> A decorated Admiral shoots himself because the validity of two of his
> many
> awards is questioned? Shoots himself in the CHEST?
>
> Can anyone say Vince Foster?
-=-=-
That's right, folks! Don't you right-wing twits feel proud to be on the
same side as the Internet's most infamous white supremacist and Holocaust
revisionist?
-=-=-
Coming in SECOND, at 25 hours and 49 minutes, is............... everyone's
favorite conspiracy nutbar, MICHAEL RIVERO!
From: riv...@accessone.com (Michael Rivero)
Newsgroups: alt.conspiracy
Subject: More news on Boorda
Date: 17 May 1996 13:19:49 -0700
> Boorda had corrected his error a year ago. Yes, he was due to suffer some
> embarressment at the hands of Newsweek, but is this really enough for a man
> who has so much else to base his self-esteem on commit suicide?
>
> If so, is it normal for such mentally fragile and emotionally unstable
> men to hold high positions in our military?
>
> I think not.
-=-=-
That's a pretty good time, but not good enough to win the prize. Currently
in FIRST PLACE, at 20 hours and 26 minutes, is......... the
always-vigilant CHARLES HELD!
From: ch...@clt.mindspring.com (Charles Held)
Newsgroups: alt.politics.clinton,alt.conspiracy,alt.fan.rush-limbaugh,
talk.politics.misc Subject: Re: Which Right-wing Twit Will Win the Prize?
(Adm. Boorda)
Date: 17 May 1996 14:56:01 GMT
> A 5'6" man shooting himself in the chest with a shotgun. Try it sometime.
-=-=-
Pretty good, huh? Charles gets extra points for getting the suicide weapon
wrong--it was a .38 caliber pistol, not a shotgun--and for being dumb
enough to post this message in *this very thread*, which ensured that it
would be automatically pre-ridiculed before ever hitting the net.
-=-=-
Now, I can't believe that every right-wing twit on Usenet was able to
contain himself for more than 20 hours before starting in with the
irresponsible speculation. Surely SOMEONE has seen a post from Thursday
afternoon claiming--utterly without supporting evidence, of course--that
Admiral Boorda was murdered. If you can point me to one, please e-mail me
at phe...@halcyon.com. Your contribution will be gratefully acknowledged!
nuk...@nwark.com
Paul H. Henry wrote:
>
> This afternoon, Admiral Jeremy Michael Boorda, the nation's top Navy
> note has been found that would help explain how this man came to such a
> terrible point in his life that he felt suicide was the only way out, but
> Boorda was scheduled to meet with a Newsweek reporter today to answer
> charges that for years Boorda had worn a combat "V" decoration that he was
> never officially awarded.
>
> But this is 1996, and no powerful man is allowed to end his own life
> without being dug up and paraded around the room by drooling right-wing
> twits.
>
> TWIT AWARD, to be awarded to the first demented conspirazoid in this or
> another newsgroup who suggests that the Admiral was murdered by agents of
> the Bill Clinton presidential administration.
>
>
> SCREAM! As they cite shadowy, nameless figures and obscure newsletters to
> back themselves up!
>
> WRITHE IN AGONY! As they contort logic to tie this incident in with all
> the other murders they've made up!
>
>
> --Admiral Boorda was declared dead at 2:30 p.m. Eastern Daylight Time on
> Thursday, May 16, 1996. This time is designated Hour Zero.
>
> --The prize will be awarded to the right-wing twit who posts the first
> lunatic theory about Adm. Boorda being murdered, as verified by the
> time-date stamp at the top of his post.
>
> --After the first post is spotted, the poster will be declared Provisional
> Winner for exactly one week, during which time anyone may find and submit
> evidence of an earlier post on the subject, to counter the effects of
> net.lag. After one week, a final winner will be declared.
>
> of humor are ineligible for the award. Twits who are unknown to the judge
> will have their old posts searched on Alta Vista and Deja News to
> phe...@halcyon.com with the text of another person's potential winning
> post.
>
> --Any right-wing twit who suggests that (a) Adm. Boorda was having an
> affair with Hillary Rodham Clinton or (b) the President himself pulled the
> trigger will win the coveted Moron's Prize. The Moron's Prize will go to
> all twits who make one of these two pronouncements, not just the one who
> wins the main award.
>
> --No money or other goods will be awarded to the winner. The only prize
> will be worldwide recognition of the winning twit's absolute idiocy, along
> with whatever ridicule may spring from such recognition.
>
>
> Spotter's Prize will be awarded to the first liberal who e-mails me with a
> correct guess as to the identity of the eventual winning twit. You all
> know who the usual suspects are, so I shan't prejudice the results with my
> own prediction. To win the Spotter's Prize, the contestant must submit a
> post in this thread or an e-mail message to me at phe...@halcyon.com. The
> post or message must be time-stamped EARLIER than the time-stamp of the
> twit's winning post, for obvious reasons.
>
>
>
Hey, as a right winger (non-twit), Clinton had nothing to do with this.
There was no suicide note (Clinton's smarter than that). Plus, he had a
reason to do it, a fake medal (how did they find this out with no
suicide note?)
HENRY E. KILPATRICK JR.
: contestents for my Right-Wing Twit Prize. The prize, as you'll recall,
: that suicidal Admiral Mike Boorda was done in by agents of the Clinton
: administration.
: Here, then, are the current top three that I have been made aware of. Time
: listed is the number of hours the message was posted after 2:30 pm on
: Thursday, May 16, when the admiral was pronounced dead.
: -=-=-
: Coming in THIRD, at 29 hours and 17 minutes, is............ notorious
: net.nazi MILTON KLEIM!!
: Coming in SECOND, at 25 hours and 49 minutes, is............... everyone's
: favorite conspiracy nutbar, MICHAEL RIVERO!
: That's a pretty good time, but not good enough to win the prize. Currently
: in FIRST PLACE, at 20 hours and 26 minutes, is......... the
: always-vigilant CHARLES HELD!
: -=-=-
: Now, I can't believe that every right-wing twit on Usenet was able to
: contain himself for more than 20 hours before starting in with the
: irresponsible speculation. Surely SOMEONE has seen a post from Thursday
: afternoon claiming--utterly without supporting evidence, of course--that
: Admiral Boorda was murdered. If you can point me to one, please e-mail me
: at phe...@halcyon.com. Your contribution will be gratefully acknowledged!
Damn! My money was on John Q. Better send that slow old nag to the glue factory.
--
Buddy K