Astro Limerick--Fraknoi
W. Watson
had written down once, but can't find. It had to do with an astronaut,
space, and the disappearance of something, I believe. Anyone know what I'm
talking about and knows the limerick?
Wayne T. Watson (Watson Adventures, Prop., Nevada City, CA)
(121.015 Deg. W, 39.262 Deg. N) GMT-8 hr std. time)
Obz Site: 39° 15' 7" N, 121° 2' 32" W, 2700 feet
Tiddy Ogg
<wolf_...@invalid.com> wrote:
>Some years ago I heard Andrew Fraknoi speak and he recited a limerick that I
>had written down once, but can't find. It had to do with an astronaut,
>space, and the disappearance of something, I believe. Anyone know what I'm
>talking about and knows the limerick?
Haven't a clue.
There once was an astronaut, crass,
Who stuffed rocket fuel up his ass.
And then this bloke, weird,
Lit a match, disappeared
In a huge ball of flaming hot gas.
I'd like to reply with more suavity,
And not stoop to filthy depravity,
Alas, it's the case,
That once out in space,
One's mind becomes free of such gravity.
Of gravity: people have dealt
Out theories, best was, I felt:
Why don't everyone
Of us crash to the sun?
Earth's held up by the asteroid belt.
Tiddy Ogg.
http://www.tiddyogg.co.uk
RanDog
geodesic grid:
I'm unaware of the Limerick you described, but here are a few from me
that detail astronauts losing themselves in space...
An astronaut, lonely in space,
Would fondly caress and embrace
His wand of wankism
'Til pearls of hot jism
Were floating all over the place.
At zero-G, sex can be tricky,
But Major Tom needed a quickie.
His payload was stirring
When Specialist Scheuring
Warned, "Dock in my twat with that dickie."
On one of the Space Shuttle missions
A virgin lost all inhibitions.
With reckless abandon,
She shagged every gland in
The vessel in spaced-out positions.
When circling high over the Earth,
A woody of quim-stretching girth,
'Though weightless, will pack
A punch in the sack
For gals who have booked a space berth.
Wayne, why don't you ask Andrew Fraknoi directly? I suspect that your
inquiry here will just yield more putrid Limericks of the sort Tiddy
Ogg and I have penned. Dr. Fraknoi's website, which has contact details
(including an email address), can be found at:
http://www.foothill.fhda.edu/ast/afraknoi.htm
The OEDILF site has numerous astronaut Limericks which are more
suitable for the G and PG crowd. The most clever by far, attributed to
"alkahuna", reads:
"Let's be astronauts! Earth can't restrain us!"
You answered, "Not me!", which was heinous.
So I flew to the stars,
Venus, Pluto and Mars!
You stayed home and just Saturn Uranus.
Hugh Clary
The only two lims I recall
That mention what problems befall
Those who think about space
Are the ones I will place
Below, though my chances are small:
An astronomer's swift limousine,
Went through a red light in Racine.
He was going so fast,
That the light which he passed,
Through the Doppler effect, showed as green.
"Are the tarts", they asked Astronaut Muller,
"On Uranus more lively...or duller?"
He replied, "They're obscene!
Since their pussies are green,
They are whores of a different color!"
RanDog
indicated he was still on his Limerick quest:
> Sam Wormley wrote:
>
> > W. Watson wrote:
> >
> >> Some years ago I heard Andrew Fraknoi speak and he recited a limerick
> >> that I
> >> had written down once, but can't find. It had to do with an astronaut,
> >> space, and the disappearance of something, I believe. Anyone know what
> >> I'm
> >> talking about and knows the limerick?
> >>
> >> Wayne T. Watson (Watson Adventures, Prop., Nevada City, CA)
> >> (121.015 Deg. W, 39.262 Deg. N) GMT-8 hr std. time)
> >> Obz Site: 39° 15' 7" N, 121° 2' 32" W, 2700 feet
> >
> > Does this help?
> > http://www.oedilf.com/db/Lim.php?Word=astronaut
> >
> Helpful, but not among the eight there. I'm very sure black hole was part of
> the limerick, and possibly the word poof. Searched the above site, but zippo.
I can't find what you're looking for either, but Limericks that include
"astronaut", "black hole" and "poof" are easy enough to invent...
The astronaut reached the event
Horizon and - POOF - he was bent
By a squeezing sensation,
"Spaghettification",
When sucked through the black hole's keen vent.
Reference:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Spaghettification
Over in the Limericks group where Wayne also posted this query, one
would expect a response more along the lines of...
The astronaut, stiffened with fear,
Was thrust in her final frontier.
Just like a black hole,
Her deep-throating role
Made all she sucked - POOF - disappear.
W. Watson
Thanks. These are very good. I wish I could grasp the style of the limerick.
It looks like they'd be fun to construct. I liked the "Spaghettification"
angle.
Wayne T. Watson (Watson Adventures, Prop., Nevada City, CA)
(121.015 Deg. W, 39.262 Deg. N) GMT-8 hr std. time)
Obz Site: 39° 15' 7" N, 121° 2' 32" W, 2700 feet
--
"This spring I knew we had a good bunch of players. When
they won the American League title they became a team."
-- Jim Leyland, Detroit Tiger manager, 2006.
Web Page: <home.earthlink.net/~mtnviews>
W. Watson
Here's the story behind Fraknoi. He responded to me with the limerick 5-6
years ago. Several years ago I swapped out my old computer and HD. The HD is
in my garage somewhere and very likely contains the limerick. Getting to it
is another matter.
I sent him a message several weeks ago and he hadn't a clue about the
limerick, and couldn't recall it. He sounded a bit less than enthusiastic
about trying to recall it. Sure surprised me. Thus I went to the internet. I
was, however, greatly surprised at the number of limericks on the subject.
Wow! Perhaps if I send him some of these to trigger his memory.
Sorry about my responses being rather sporadic. My life has been quite
impacted for weeks by getting some video material for my son's wedding last
Saturday. Wheh! Do I need a breather.
Wayne T. Watson (Watson Adventures, Prop., Nevada City, CA)
(121.015 Deg. W, 39.262 Deg. N) GMT-8 hr std. time)
Obz Site: 39° 15' 7" N, 121° 2' 32" W, 2700 feet
RanDog
depressingly prose-ish and very pasty wad:
> [snip]
Send him this one -- lol!
Cassiopeia had a black hole
That pulled my Galactic North Pole
Due South 'til a pang
Announced a big bang
O'er which I had little control.
Hugh Clary
>Here's the story behind Fraknoi. He responded to me with the limerick 5-6
>years ago. Several years ago I swapped out my old computer and HD. The HD is
>in my garage somewhere and very likely contains the limerick. Getting to it
>is another matter.
>
>I sent him a message several weeks ago and he hadn't a clue about the
>limerick, and couldn't recall it. He sounded a bit less than enthusiastic
>about trying to recall it. Sure surprised me. Thus I went to the internet. I
>was, however, greatly surprised at the number of limericks on the subject.
>Wow! Perhaps if I send him some of these to trigger his memory.
>
If a pest is a frequent returner,
Herr Fraknoi is bound to get sterner
When constantly pecked,
And I'm one to suspect
That Watson's a very slow learner.
W. Watson
As Peter Seller's said in a movie, "Now, now". Bye.
Wayne T. Watson (Watson Adventures, Prop., Nevada City, CA)
(121.015 Deg. W, 39.262 Deg. N) GMT-8 hr std. time)
Obz Site: 39° 15' 7" N, 121° 2' 32" W, 2700 feet
--
"There is more to life than increasing its speed"
-- Mahatma Gandhi
Web Page: <home.earthlink.net/~mtnviews>
W. Watson
"Apollo to Mission Control
We are almost in reach of our goal,
But our readings of g
Seem excessive to me,
So we may be inside a black ho....."
Wayne T. Watson (Watson Adventures, Prop., Nevada City, CA)
(121.015 Deg. W, 39.262 Deg. N) GMT-8 hr std. time)
Obz Site: 39° 15' 7" N, 121° 2' 32" W, 2700 feet
--
John Miller
> And, so here it is:
>
> "Apollo to Mission Control
> We are almost in reach of our goal,
> But our readings of g
> Seem excessive to me,
> So we may be inside a black ho....."
>
>
> Wayne T. Watson (Watson Adventures, Prop., Nevada City, CA)
> (121.015 Deg. W, 39.262 Deg. N) GMT-8 hr std. time)
> Obz Site: 39° 15' 7" N, 121° 2' 32" W, 2700 feet
A black hole's a bad place to GO
'Cause the gravity stresses you so
Don't get in a lather
When told I would rather
Be COMING, while in a black ho
--
hard...@neto.com (John Miller)
(903) 632 5226