One more for the Clinton Body Count
Gandalf Grey
Busheviks
Accuse Clinton
Busheviks Accuse Clinton
Of Ramming US Spy Plane Near China
By BuzzFlash Foreign Correspondent Dwayne Eutsey
REAGANGRAD-In a ploy to divert attention from a number of recent policy
bungles and the unrelenting Wall Street meltdown, senior Bushevik
functionaries today accused ex-President William Clinton of piloting the
Chinese fighter jet that collided with a US spy plane near China Sunday.
"A source close to the Chinese regime has confirmed that this dastardly act
of treason is indeed true," a spokesman said in a press briefing today.
"True, of course, being a relative term," he mumbled.
Although the spokesperson refused to reveal the source's identity, it is
widely known that the only Bushevik source close to the "Butchers of
Beijing" is Poppy Bush, who is said to have "partied down" with the
dictactorship shortly after its bloody 1989 massacre of pro-democracy
demonstrators in Tiananmen Square.
The source did indicate, however, that a Congressional investigation into
Clinton's role in the spy-plane incident is in development. Because TV
ratings for previous Clinton show-trials have been "as low as the Dow," the
source said that Dan Burton and Trent Lott are currently working closely
with the major news networks to develop a brasher, 'in-your-face" kind of
investigation/mini-series entitled, "The Manchurian Candidate II-Clinton's
Revenge!"
According to the reliable source, Burton and Lott have also worked out a
merchandizing tie-in with fast-food chains in which action figures based on
the investigation/mini-series will be included in kid's meals. The figures
will feature a character based on Clinton (Bill Of Rats Clinton) who battles
the benign oligarchy of GI George and his Republican Guard T.
Promotional copy for the toys indicate that GI George's special feature will
be his unique ability to disappear during military engagements. Each of the
Republican Guard T (which includes figures based on Trent Lott, Dick Cheney,
Tom DeLay, Rush Limbaugh and other Busheviks) will come with special
"deferment" shields protecting them from military service along with
American flags suitable for wrapping themselves in.
Conspicuously absent from today's press briefing was Bushevik strongman GW
Bush. Despite the current corporate-media marketing blitz attempting to
brand Bush as "President," he remains secluded in his White House bunker.
Pundits speculate that Bush locked himself in the bunker following reports
that another illegitimate president, Slobodon Milosevic, has recently been
arrested for abuse of power, treason, and other crimes, causing concerns at
that White House that a popular uprising might occur in the United States.
--
"If this were a dictatorship, it would be a heck of a lot easier, just so
long as I'm the dictator." George W. Bush, Televised Newsconference
December 18, 2000