Artists
Keith E. Sullivan
GROWING YOUNG
Some years ago, a retrospective showing of Pablo Picasso's works was
held at the Museum of Modern Art in New York City. Nearly a thousand of
Picasso's works were displayed in chronological order, beginning when he
was a very young boy. The early works were traditional landscapes and
still-lifes. Then, as the artist advanced in age, brilliant colours
began to emerge, and the still-lifes were no longer very still.
Finally, of course, the works turned into the kind of bold, zesty
abstractions for which Picasso is best known. One art critic who saw
the show recalled that once, when Picasso was eighty-five, he was asked
the reason why his earlier works were so solemn and his later works so
ecstatic and exciting. "How do you explain it?" asked the interviewer.
"Easily," Picasso responded. "It takes a long time to become young!"
Maurizio Mariotti <mari...@IAFRICA.COM>
UGA Humor List <hu...@uga.cc.uga.edu>
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THE TOP 16 LEAST-LOVED NORMAN ROCKWELL PAINTINGS (PART I)
16. Daddy Hugging St. John: The Morning After
15. Shootin' Smack in the Bus Station Restroom
14. Some Old Guys Fartin' Around
13. Ellen and Laura Sittin' in a Tree
12. Building Pipe Bombs With Gramps
11. Whiskers Visits the Bird Shop
10. Still Life with Axe: the Artist's Wife and the Stablehand
9. Mad Dog!
8. Billy Gets Tubes In His Ears
7. Domestic Partner Marriage License
6. Sniper at the Mall
5. A Slight Miss at the Bris
4. Shaving Grandma's Corns
3. The Surprise Under Junior's Mattress
2. She'll Show You for a Quarter
1. Happy Birthday, Blow-Up Wanda!
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=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=
THE TOP 15 LEAST-LOVED NORMAN ROCKWELL PAINTINGS (PART II)
15. Drug Deal at the 7-11
14. Mom's Visit From The Milkman
13. Throwing Up At The Prom
12. A Visit to Grandpa's Proctologist
11. Kevin's First Militia Haircut
10. Detective Fuhrman Finds Some Evidence
9. Billy Gets To 3rd Base
8. Rover Leaves a Gift Under the Christmas Tree
7. Darius's First L.A.P.D. Beating
6. "Get off my lawn, damn it!"
5. Nude Descending My Torso
4. "I'll give you something to cry about!"
3. That's Not the Avon Lady, Mrs. Buttafuoco
2. Outhouse Over Easy
1. Mean Old Whore
[ This list copyright 1997 by Chris White and Ziff Davis, Inc. ]
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THE MODEL
Some time ago, there was this artist, who worked from a studio in his
home. He specialized in nudes, and had been working on what he thought
would be a masterpiece for several months now.
As usual, his model reported, and after exchanging the usual greetings
and small talk, she began to undress for the day's work. He told her
not to bother, that he felt pretty bad with a cold he had been
fighting. He added that he would pay her for the day, but that she
could just go home; he just wanted some hot tea and then, off to bed.
The model said, "Oh, please, let me fix it for you. It's the least I
can do." He agreed and told her to fix herself a cup too.
They were sitting in the living room just exchanging small talk and
enjoying their tea, when he heard the front door open and close, then
some familiar footsteps.
"Oh my God!!!" he whispered loudly, "It's my wife! Quick!!! Take all
your clothes off."
Jim Moore Jr. <ji...@PIPELINE.COM>
UGA Humor List <hu...@uga.cc.uga.edu>
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Jackque417
I love the story of Picasso at one of his shows. He overheard a woman say-"I
hate Picasso".
Picasso tapped her on the shoulder and said "which one?"
Thanks for the touch of class-Picasso was a character, as well as a genius,and
there are a lot of funny storieds about him.
I can always tell someone who knows nothing about art-they hate Picasso-Rofl
Jackie
jacquelyne
Daniel R. Baker
Here's a Picasso story. Supposedly a Nazi officer visiting Franquista
Spain saw Picasso looking at his painting "Guernica," his rendition of
the Nazi bombing of the defenseless civilian village.
Outraged, the Nazi confronted Picasso, pointed at the picture and
demanded to know, "Did you do this?"
"No," Picasso replied, "you did."
(BTW, I don't care for most of Picasso's painting. I guess I know
nothing about art and will have to be content with non-artists lke
Ribera, Goya, Bellini, et. al. Sigh...)
Regards,
Daniel R. Baker.
(Disclaimers ad nauseam).
Digger
Daniel R. Baker wrote:
> Here's a Picasso story. Supposedly a Nazi officer visiting Franquista
> Spain saw Picasso looking at his painting "Guernica," his rendition of
> the Nazi bombing of the defenseless civilian village.
>
> Outraged, the Nazi confronted Picasso, pointed at the picture and
> demanded to know, "Did you do this?"
>
> "No," Picasso replied, "you did."
After West Germany knocked England out of the 1970 Soccer World Cup a
German player ran up to England's captain Bobby Charlton and crowed
"Ahh, Bobby we have finally beaten you, first time this century...and at
your game!" Charlton glowered at the German player and shot back, "So
what,we've beaten you twice this century at your game!"