etext Book 2 Chapter 8
Karim Arain
I'm not very good at it. Hope you enjoy it.
***
Book II, Chapter 8
Fare badly, Lorien
That night the Company was again summoned to the ramshackle tree hut
of Galadriel (and Dullborn the Wise). There Dullborn the Wise spoke to
them and bade them to hasten their departure for "the time to leave
draweth nigh", as he said. "But before thou leavest (and we can
finally get rid of this bothersome dwarf) thou must decide where to
make for when thou set forth."
Then Galadriel looked at each of the Company and said "They are as yet
undecided, every one of them."
Aragon at once spoke up. "As leader of this Company I deem it best if
we make directly for ... eh ... for ... eh ... Mordor! Yes! Mordor! We
have to destroy the Ring. It is too dangerous a thing for Elf or
mortal to wield. And we have to claim Frodo's inheritance, of course".
At the mention of his name Frodo looked up smiling. "Inheritance. Oh
yes. Blue niphredils in high fields of green. Purple waters of Nurnen
reflecting the starlight of Varda in clear skies. Horses thundering
over yellow fields of corn..."
Into the ensuing silence Pipsqueak peeped "But what about Isengard?
What about Aruman's subpoena? Don't we have to go there first?".
"Well, yes", Aragon said, "Isengard. Of course we are going to make
for Isengard first. Never meant to do anything else".
"Subpoena. You're gonna bow before some stupid law? I'll do this to
your stupid subpoena!", Morrie brawled and flashed one of his knifes
menacingly while Lego-lass asked "But how do we know Aruman is still
in Isengard and hasn't been summoned to Mordor?", Boromir(tm) declared
firmly "I think we should make for Gondor(tm), for my home town of
Minas Tirith(tm)." and Giggly giggled excitedly.
Arwen nudged Aragon sideways and Aragon decided that he best reassert
his authority and fast. He spoke up and decisively said "Eh... I ...
eh ...".
"At least thou shouldst decide which side of the River thou wantst to
take", Dullborn the Wise's deep voice broke into the confusion.
Everyone looked up at him except Frodo who was studying the ceiling
and smiling. "Well, that's easy", Aragon declaimed firmly, "we will
take the west side... No, I meant the east side... Or west?".
Galadriel spoke up. "Well, apparently you need time yet to decide. But
my wise husband has thought of a way to help you.". Dullborn the Wise
looked perplexed. "They will be travelling along a RIVER", Galadriel
nudged, "and don't know which SIDE to take.". Dullborn the Wise stared
blankly at her. "With RIVERS you don't need to take SIDES.", Galadriel
looked imploringly at her husband. "With the right EQUIPMENT you can
delay the choosing". Still nothing. "You can just FLOAT along".
"Ah, yes.", Dullborn declared wisely, "we will lend thou rafts. Then
thou canst travel ON the river and needest not make so portentous a
decision hastily as which side thou wouldst take". Galadriel sighed,
"What the wise and noble Dullborn meant is we would have lent you
rafts if we still had enough trees to fell and build them with.
Instead Dullborn the Wise generously lets you take some of our fast
elvish rowboats. They need rowers, yes, but we can bind three of them
together and then your manservant, Sam, can row all of you."
They accepted the offer gratefully (except for Sam who muttered
something about imperialist opressors and revolution).
"All that is", Galadriel amended, "except for you, Arwen.". She looked
at her granddaughter. "Your father El Rond has sent an Eagle from
Rivendell with a message ordering you to come home at once.". "Eagle",
Boromir(tm) cried the same time as Giggly, jumping excitely up and
down, asked, "Is it still here? Is it?". "Why, no, I sent it back".
Galadriel looked flustered, "Did you want to send a message back?".
"We thought", Aragon began, "We could have ... Oh, never mind..."
Arwen's face had darkened during this conversation. Now she spoke up.
"I am definitely NOT going back. Now when things get interesting and I
even might become the heroine of the upcoming movie instead of a
sidekick, I'll definitely NOT be going home!" Galadriel smiled
benevolently at her. Lights played on her hair and the soft music of
violins welled up from the background. "Well, yes, I can see that a
chance at fame cannot be passed over.", she said, "I will write a
letter to El Rond and explain. He will understand".
"And now", Galadriel continued, "it is time for presents.". She
clapped her hands and fair Elf maidens entered bearing the presents of
Galadriel and Dullborn for the company of the Ring. To Aragon as
leader of the party she gave a green gem and said "This is the
Elfstone foretold of old, heirloom of the House of Gil-Gallamine. May
it bring you more luck than its last bearer and may it be a warning to
you: The time of relaxing is not yet at hand. Beware of Orc maidens!".
"And I have something else to give you", she continued, "something
that might save your sword from breaking again." She smiled and handed
him a small silver key. Aragon blushed furiously, then a big smile
crept across his face. He bowed deeply and then beamed at Arwen who
winked back at him.
Galadriel then turned to the rest of the company. To Boromir(tm) she
gave a Golden Warhorn of Summoning and Morrie and Pipsqueak were
gifted with a Silver Belt of Restoration each while Lego-Lass received
a Composite Elven Long Bow +3. Her granddaughter Arwen she presented
with Winged Leather Boots of Speed.
Then she looked at Giggly. "And what gift would a Dwarf ask of the
Elves?", she asked. "None", Giggly giggled, "for I already received
more than I ever dared to hope". "Hear all ye Elves", Galadriel cried.
"Let none ever say again that all Dwarves are grasping and
ungracious.". "Well, not ungracious, at least", she amended.
"Nonetheless a gift you shall have", Galadriel said and handed him an
autographed poster of herself (a VERY limited collectors edition, only
genuine with a strand of original hair of Galadriel interwoven into
its fabric). Giggly gasped, then started excitedly to jump up and
down. "What joy, what joy. I shall take it with me always and when I
come home to the Dwarvish Mines of Erebor at last, I shall encase this
treasure in imperishable crystal and it shall be a heirloom of my
house!".
Galadriel then turned to Sam. "I don't have much I can give you to
help you serve your betters in this quest and besides, it wouldn't be
proper, of course. Only by exhausting themselves in the service of
their masters can true servants show their worth, after all, and
receive praise. But I do have something that might help you ease the
life of your master after the quest is done.". And she handed Sam a
small box. "In this box", she said, "is collected the essence of the
trees felled for constructing the famous Golf course of Lorien,
bespoken with potent spells. When your master settles down in Nurnen
after this quest he may be missing the woods of the Shire. Then open
this box and spread its contents. There a forest will grow such as the
deforested shores of Nurnen have never seen before. Elvish Mallorn
trees will grow there, high and mighty, and no axe nor chainsaw may
fell them for the spells laid on the contents of this box protect them
from any harm. Eternally they will stand on the shores of the
beautiful Lake Nurnen and your Master will enjoy taking a respite from
the southern heat there while you faithfully toil in his service.".
Sam silently took the box and bowed as well as he could.
Finally, Galadriel turned to Frodo who was still smiling at the
ceiling. "And you, Ring-Bearer", she said, "I come to you last who are
not last in my thoughts. For you I have this", and she handed him a
small white stone. "This is an old heirloom of the Elves and came to
us under mysterious circumstances from far away. I has waited here for
you since the beginning of time. It is a light imperishable that will
shine for you in the dark when all other lights have gone out. But you
must name it first.". Frodo smiled at her. "Al'Tsahir", he said and
the stone glowed brightly and leapt into his hand. "All the saws
here", he corrected himself, "endlessly cutting trees of golden
mallorn. Lights glowing brightly with neon colours of white. Pink
slippers of glorious shine on wandering Santas of rosemarin..."
At the mention of The Clause all fell silent. The festive mood
vanished. The spirit of the audience was broken. They dispersed and
the Company went to bed.
The next morning they were woken by Halfwit, Rummage and Orphan, the
Elves who had first met them after they entered Lorien. They led them
a last time through the fabled Golf course of Lorien and down to the
Silverlode where three boats had been readied for the Company (tied
together with the fabled Elven rope, a distant ancestor of modern
Nylon). They were stocked with food and water and contained an Elven
Cloak of Near Invisibility for each of the Company. Pipsqueak at once
tried the food. "Hmm, Crap", he said, "Good". "Enough, enough",
Halfwit laughed, "This is not Crap, these are Twinkies which are a lot
more nutritionally balanced than Crap. You have already eaten more
than you need in a whole day!".
The company then entered the boats. In one boat Aragon, Pipsqueak and
Morrie climbed, the second one was taken up by Boromir(tm), Lego-Lass
and Giggly. The third one (with the paddles) was manned by Arwen,
Frodo and Sam, who took up the paddles. They pushed off from the
Shore and the current at once swept them downriver.
As they drifted down the Silverlode and into the Great River they saw
the last edge of Lorien, a tongue of land between the Silverlode and
the Great River, coming towards them. There the players clubhouse was
situated and out on the lawn a big picnic had been readied. Galadriel
and Dullborn stood at a small pier waiting for them among a company of
brightly garbed Elves and waved at them. But just as the current had
swept them almost past Galadriel and Dullborn and Sam started turning
the boats around and making toward the pier they felt a tingle, a
golden flickering and suddenly time seemed to speed up... The current
of the River became a torrent... It swept them past the pier and down
the Great River. Before they could react they passed a bend in the
River and Lorien was out of sight. Frodo passed out.
"Well", thought Sam, "so much for the good. At least I don't have to
deal with those snobbish imperialist Elves again, and that's a fact.
Giving me a box of FOREST ESSENCE for the delight of my MASTER." He
shook his head. The ruse with the autograph hadn't worked, but this...
He smiled and took the box out of his pack. It was much lighter now.
Well, he had made good use of its original contents. Let them try to
play golf in a dense forest of uncuttable trees, those greedy
capitalists! After all, what did HE need forest essence for. No, he
had replaced this crap in the box with something far more useful...
END OF CHAPTER 8
Cliffhanger! Cliffhanger! ;-)
--
Just because you're paranoid doesn't mean they're NOT out to get you.
Öjevind Lång
>Well, here it is, Chapter 8 of Book 2. No poetry this time, though, as
>I'm not very good at it. Hope you enjoy it.
>
>***
>
>Book II, Chapter 8
>
>Fare badly, Lorien
[snip]
Bravo! Bravo! [Applause.]
Poor oppressed Sam! If he does not start a revolution and set up a
guillotine in the Party Field I will think less of him.
Öjevind
O. Sharp
most opportune! But what did he put in the box?...
...One question: may _mallorn_ be corrected to _forlorn_ in the Web
version?
------------------------------------------------------------------
o...@netcom.com ...I know, I know; nitpicking. :) :)
Karim Arain
>...One question: may _mallorn_ be corrected to _forlorn_ in the Web
>version?
No problem with that from my side. But then you have to correct
Chapter 7, too, as IIRC Mallorn appears in that delightful song "Varda
in the sky with starlight".
Ciao. Karim
David Salo
Karim...@uni-passau.de wrote:
> No problem with that from my side. But then you have to correct
> Chapter 7, too, as IIRC Mallorn appears in that delightful song "Varda
> in the sky with starlight".
Well, Frodo in his curiously dem... er, enhanced state was doubtless
slightly confused. :)
DS
Prembone
Sam's gift! (I can't access newsgroups, but I read this chapter
and its predecessor on O. Sharp's site.) Can't wait to see
what's in the box... Galadriel's labored explanation to
Dullborn about RIVERS and SIDES was likewise inspired. Good job!
Prembone
..who decided to take some vacation time and so cut out of work
early. ;-) Off to see Shakespeare in the Park tonight!
--
God was my co-pilot, but our plane crashed in the mountains
and I had to eat him.
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Dany Belinfante
Karim Arain <ara...@FSUNI.rz.uni-passau.de> schreef in berichtnieuws
<snip>
I started giggling(tm) almost straight off, laughed hysteriously at times,
and just generally loved this part. The best I liked the part where the
coaching of Dullborn by Galadriel takes extreme form... So funny!
Dany