[Cheap MST part 4] Sonic Fights Robotnik 7: Blue Streak Speeds By
JSolano199
Knothole Villiage
It is a shiny new day in Knothole village. All the stuff is going on, etc.>>
Jamie- Let me guess- Robotnik comes back, and Sonic fights an excessively large
number
of bots!
<<Sonic is sitting around doing nothing inparticular. He decides to buy a chili
dog. He
walks
over to the vending machine, puts in his quarters and....
SUDDENLY THE VENDING MACHINE ATTACKS!>>
David- A new Fox special.
<<Sonic dodges a clark bar, and quickly spin dashes the machine in half.
Sonic then goes to Rotors hut and says "Yo ROte, don't put SWAT chips in the
vending
machine
any more"
"Ok" says Rotor, doing an OK sign with his left hand.>>
Scott- What did he just do?!
Jamie- An ok sign. Your glasses are cracked, remember?
<<*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*
1 week and 7 days later
Sally is looking for Sonic.
"Where could that hedgehog be?" she thinks.
"Ah ha, he must be at Bunnie's casino" she thinks.>>
Jamie- Why is there a Casino on Mobius, more importantly, why is it so close to
Knothole,
and even more importantly why is owned by Bunnie?
<<*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*
Bunnies Casino>>
David- I went there once. It was overrun by killer bunnies.
Austin-Ha.Ha.
David- Shutup.
<<Sonic, Rotor, Tails, and some extra, "background" characters are shooting
craps.
Sonic puts 5 chili dogs and a mountain due on the pass line.>>
Scott- Mountain DEW! DEW DAMN YOU DEW!!!
Jamie- Calm down, Scott, you’re swearing.
David- Hey, me and Austin swear.
Jamie- Scott feels it’s a dirt habit. That and N’Sync posters
Scott- N’Sync! NO!!
<<"C'mon Rotor, roll that 8!" says Sonic
Rotor shakes the dice.
Just then Sally bursts though the Casino's doors!
Rotor say "Agck"
Rotor throws the dice!
7!!!
"You lose Sonic" says Tails.
"Yo sal" says Sonic "You just made me lose my lunch!">>
Jamie- That was almost funny...
<<"Sonic, did you break the vending machine?" asks Sally
"Um, no" says Sonic.
"Sooonic..." says Sally
"I said no!" says SOnic
"SONIC!" says Sally
"No way!" says Sonic
"STOp LYniNG!" says Sal>>
David- I ORDEr YoU TO SToP!
<<"Ok ok ok ok ok ok ok ok ok I did it." says Sonic.
"We're taking this to Mad Eddy's to get it fixed. Come along Sonic." says
Sally>>
Scott- Mad Eddy’s is a fix it shop too? Pretty versatile.
<<"Me too!" says Tails.
"But tails it's dangero.." says Sally
"Me TOOOOOOO!" says Rotor>>
Jamie(Sally)- Let’s go to the circus!
Scott(Tails)-Yay!
David(Amy) I wanna go too..hey waiaminute...
Austin(Rotor)- ME TOO! ME TOO! GIMME PIGGYBACK RIDE!!
<<"I wanna go to" says Dulcy, running into a slot machine. "OOof! Arrrrg I
dOn'T wanna
do
homeworrrk">>
David- THeN skIp scHoOOOOL
<<"all right, all right, sheeeeeessssshhhhhhhhhhhhhh" says Sally, walking out
the doors,
with
all the freedom fihgters trailing behind her.
*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*
Outside Mad Eddy's
Ed and Dave are standing around outside.
"Ok here's the plan." says Dave "We sneak in the back, steal the merchandise,
and get out
before we get caught"
"Sounds like a plan Dave!" says Edward.>>
Scott(Edward)-Except maybe that there’s about a few million copies, but it’s
good!
<<They sneak around to the back door. Dave opens it using a "Lock Pickin' (tm)"
attatchment from
his arm.
They are in the stock room. Ed starts humming the Mission Impossible theme.>>
David- And I slap him!
Austin- (David slaps Ed! David kicks butt!)
<<*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*
Inside Mad Eddy's
Eddy: BWA HA!
Ralph: WOO HOO!
Robotnik and Snivley walk in.>>
Austin- But they died! Didn’t they?
<<"Those dancing SWATbots were fun for a while" says Robotnik "But they're not
very
productive. >>
Austin begins to laugh hysterically
<<All they do is dance dance dance. The nuclear reactors aren't being monitored
and if we
don't
hurry up and buy some new chips, there's going to be a massive nuclear
explosion in
robotropolis. AGAIN.">>
Jamie- Not like any of the blast or fallout affected us.
<<"Less talk, more buy" says Snivley.
Eddy: I think I hear the mission impossible theme!
Ralph: Then there is only one possible conclusion...>>
David- Hey, what happened?
Jamie- He switched format
<<Eddy: I think so
Ralph: and that is....
Eddy&Ralph: Theivin' bandits in the stock room!
They rush down the stairs to the stock room.>>
David- What were they doing before?
Austin chuckles
David-Dammit Austin!
<<Robotnik says "Quickly Snivley! Now is our opportunity for the great triumph
of the
Robotnik
empire! Shove as much stuff into your pockets as you possibly can!">>
David- Back to the old format...
Scott- Wait- Wouldn’t they just capture Mad Eddy and roboticize him?
<<*^*^*^*^*^*^*
Stock Room
Eddy: HALT THEIF!>>
Austin- Mein Kampf!
<<David trips and knocks over a shelf of Poke balls.>>
David- Ok, this guy has an unhealthy obsession with Pokemon
<<Edward dives behind the monolith from 2001: A space odessy.
Ralph: You theives! Prepare to do battle!
Ralph launches into a M. Bison torpedo, while Eddy does a Shoyrouken.>>
Scott- Sho-Ryu-Ken. Get it right!
<<Dave: oof
Ed: Ow ow
Eddy picks up a Poke ball and throws it.
"Pikachu, I choose you!">>
David- Alright that’s it! Someone’s going to die! Austin! C’mere!
Austin- What?
David gets a power drill and drives it through Austin’s skull.
David- HAHAhAHA!!!
<<"Pika Pi?"
"Pikachu, thundershock, now!"
"PiikaaacHHHUUUUUUUUUUU!!!!!!!!!!!!"
Everybody is zapped by a 20,000 gigawatt blast of electricity.>>
Jamie- Oh, come on. Pikachu doesn’t have enough electric energy to power a
light bulb
for a minute.
<<When the smoke clears they get up.
Eddy: All right punks, what's the big idea? You think shoplifting is cool or
something?
Well
you're just not cool! Ok, you got it? I can't stress that point enough. THose
dudes in the
"Cool Club" say they're cool, and you probably want to get into their club.
After all they
have the biggest treehouse on the block. But breaking the law is seriously
UN-cool. You
just
blew it, and now you're going to pay.>>
David- That was pretty funny actually.
<<Ed: But wait, we can explain!
Eddy: I don't know what your malfunction is, but you can think about it IN
JAIL!
Dave: Hey, this isn't Need For Speed III.
Eddy: SHUT YO MOUTH!
Dave: Now wait just a phrackin' minute! What right do you have to just send me
to jail
without
even hearing my side of the story?!?!?!?!?!?>>
Scott- he has a point
David-Shutup.
<< now what i did was probably a mistake. And we all
make mistakes sometimes. SMAK was a mistake for me, and I destoyed every
remaining
copy of it
3 years ago. But some people just don't want to let me forget it. I'm not like
that anymore,
man! People change man! Can't we all just....get along?
Eddy: (sniff) great speach! Bravo! (clapcalpclap)
Dave: I guess I'll just take all those copies of SMAK and dispose of them in
the dumpster
outside...
Eddy: Wait a minute! I have a bottom line you know! You gotta pay for stuff
when you
buy it.
Dave: Ok how much?
Eddy: 4 billion dollars
Dave: Arrrrg...ok just a minute. (dave gets out his wallet)>>
Jamie- Where’d he get money?
Austin- Whoring himself.
David- Hey, I killed you!
Jamie- He doesn’t have a real brain, remember?
<<(voices from upstairs)
RIIIIIIIIIICOOOOOOOLLLAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!>>
David- What is Ricola? Is that like a cough drop? Like N’Ice?
<<Sonic, shut up!
Eddy: Customers! We gotta go up there Ralph. You too, theiving scum. >>
Jamie- Why do you need them?
<<BWhahahahhahah
WOOOHOOOO!!!!>>
David- What the hell was that?
<<*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*
Mad Eddy's>>
Jamie- Weren’t we just there?
<<Sonic is running around the store, jumping off the walls, ceiling, and then
hanging from
a
ceiling fan before diving in a clothes rack. The blue dude with a tude (in
other words,
Sonic)>>
Scott- I would have never guessed.
<<rolled along the ground an ran...
RIGHT INTO...
Robotnik's foot!
"Buttnik?" said Sonic
"HEDGEHOOOOOG!?!??!?!" said Robotnik
Sonic runs away screaming "AHHH!! Sally! Robotnik's here!">>
David- Then he realizes- “Hey, I can just slice a hole into him!”. Sonic does,
buys some
stuff, leaves, End of story. Can we leave now?
<<"Soooo...." says Robotnik
"SOOOO what?!" says Snivley "C'mon...tell me...Telll meeeee....I wanna
KNOOOOOOOOWWWWWW">>
David- I can just imagine him jumping around, clutching himself yelling that
out.
<<"I WASN'T FINISHED TALKING YET!" said one angry Robotnik>>
Jamie- So there’s MORE than one?
<<"Oh" says Snivley.
"Soooo" says Robotnik "The hedgehog and his friends are here. Revenge shall be
ours
tonight
Snivley! Ha ha ha ha ha ha!"
Robotnik runs towards the door. He swings it opens, turns around, with his cape
blowing
in the
wind, he raises his hand to the sky, lighning flashes, and Robotnik says "To
the parking lot
Snivley!"
"Righto mate" says Snivley.>>
David- That oughta get th’ little nipper! G’day!
<<*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*
Still Mad Eddy's
Sonic runs into Sally. He jumps up and down screaming "SAAAL! IT's RObotnik!
He's
baaaack and
he's EEEEEEVVIIILLL we gotta stop him he's gonna KILL US AHHHHHHHHH!!!">>
David(Sonic)- He’s EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEvvil! Robotnik is bad, but RObotnik
is EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEvvill!!
<<Sally says "Get off me Sonic!"
Eddy: What's wrong with that blue pincushion of yours?
Sally says "He gets kind of hyper when he drinks mountain due">>
Jamie- Can’t he find a set format?
Scott- DEW DAMMIT! DEW!!!
<<Sally says "Robotnik is NOT HERE! He is DEAD!"
Sonic says "But Sallleeeeeee when you say he's dead he's not dead and we fight
him and
fight
him and fight him"
"SONIC!" sally says "For the last time.. ROBOTNIK........... IS........
NOT.......................................................................
....................
............................... HERE!"
*whiiirrr*
****KKKKKRRRRRRRRRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAIIIIIIIIOOOSSSSSSSSHHHHHHH
HHHHOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!***>>
Austin- AHBLABLHBALBALAHBALHBABLAHABLHBLA!!!
<<The biggest laser blast anyone has ever seen totally destorys the front of
Mad Eddy's!
Eddy: HOLY FOCK!>>
Austin- That would be in the Church, with-
David gives Austin a well deserved punch in the nose
<<A huge shadow is cast. Everyone looks in horror as they see a giant metallic
Robotnik
head
hovering around.
Robotnik: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHA!!! You're in for it this time FreeDUMB
fighters!>>
Austin- I want some free Dumb Fighters!
<<HA HA! Meet the
ultimate in war technology, THE INVINCIBLE DESTORYER!
Sonic says "Yo, I don't think SO! A few spin dashes will take care of that
faster that you
can
say "Jam jam penut butter and jam juice time speeddeeder!">>
David-Jam jam penut butter and jam juice time speeddeeder
<<Sonic revs up his spin dash!>>
David- He lied! He’s barely going to a Spin Dash!
<<Sally says "Sonic, be careful!">>
Scott- To which Sonic replies “no!”
<<Sonic replies "Yo Sal, when was the last time I was careful?"
"Never, I guess" says Sally
"Yo Sal, I love you with all my true blue hedgehog heart, and if I don't make
it, i just want
you to know, that I LOVE YOU FORVER SAL! I always liked you better than Amy
Rose! Goodbye
Sally, see you whenever the next time shall be and**"
**KRAAAAABLAAAMM!!!**
SOnic just got nuked by a hyper-laser!>>
David- ABOUT TIME! Enough with SOnic! Sonic dies next, End of story, can we
leave
now?
<<Robotnik: HAHAHAHAHA! You suck, Sonic!
Sonic gets up and shakes it off.>>
Scott- But he got nuked! Great, first he gets PAPERCUT from razor sharp
gargoyle
wings, and NOW he shakes off a Nuke! Sonic Fan, you’re making him to powerfull!
<<"Robotnik.." says Sonic through clenched teeth "That's the last straw! Now
you DIE!!!
NO
MERCYYYYYY!!!!! YAAAUUUGHHH!!!!!"
Sonic revs up for a spin dash, grabs a power ring and absorbs it's energy
***WWWHIIRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR***
"I feel the need for speed, keed!" shouts Sonic.
Samuel Keed says "Who the bloody 'ell are you?">>
David- Who the bloody ‘ell is Samuel Keed?
<<Robotnik fires a sidewinder missle at sonic.
*KABOOM*
Sonic is launched! He goes flying out into the parking lot, where he lands head
first on the
concrete!>>
David- And dies! End of story, can we-
Jamie- Will you stop saying that?
<<<KLONK>
Sonic: OOof...ARrRRrrgGG....HEeLLpp MEEEeeeee......
Tails flys at the machine!
Tails: Yo Buttnickski! Nobody kills my best friend and gets away with it!>>
Scott- He didn’t kill him! He just got a little bump, that’s all. Sheesh!
<<Tails does a flying fire-tail spin!>>
Jamie- How would he do that?
<<Robotnik blasts him down with an ice cannon!
Frozen Tails falls to the ground and shatters!
Bunnie: OH MAH FREAKIN STARS! Somebody get the little hoss some medical
attent'nun! Hurry up
now, ya hear?>>
Jamie- He froze and shattered! There’s no way to save him!
<<Bookshire: I'll save him!>>
David- NO! Get that freak out of here! And take us with him!
<<Bookshire rushes in to the rescue! He gets SMASHED by a flying metal fist!
Rotor: Yo!
The machine lands on top of rotor.
Dulcy runs into the side of the machine *SMACK*
Robotnik proceeds to blast Dulcy with a flamethrower blast blast
Sally, Bunnie and Dr. Quack jump at the machine!
Sally: The House of Acorn fights with the power of Mobius!
Bunnie: You heck all is gonna get beat on by MUH!>>
David- Muh is the new villain. He kills Mammoth Mogul, Dr. Robotnik, Naugus and
Enerjak all at once!
Austin- Enerjak...that’s funny..
<<Dr Quack: DIEEEE QUUUUUUACCCCCKKKKKKK QUUUUUUUAAAAACKKK
WWUUUUAACCCKKK QUUACCCKKKK!!!
Robotnik shoots them down with anti-aircraft missles.>>
David- Good missiles gone to waste...
<<*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*
The Cockpit of the INVINCIBLE DESTORYER>>
Jamie- What does this thing Destoyr?
Scott- Godzilla vs. Destoroyah!
David-Destroyer
Scott- Destoroyah is the Japanese name!
David- Who cares?
<<Robotnik: I am unbeatable! Nothing can defeat this machine!
Snivley: That's why it's called the INVINCIBLE destroyer
Robotnik: Yes! YES INDEED!>>
David(Robotnik)- Wow, you actually some something smart! Good for you!
<<Robotnik&Snivley: Hhahahahahahahhaha! HAhahahaha ho HO HO HO HO HO!!!!
Robotnik pulls a lever and blows up Antoinne with a SCUD missle
Antoinne: Zacre BlEuh SHHHEEEEEEZZZZZZZZEEEE!!!!>>
Scott- Sheeze? CHEEZE DAMN YOU CHEEZE! IT’S DEW NOT DUE, DEEEW!!!
<<*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*
Parking Lot
Complete anarchy ensues as the battle continues.
David gonterman jumps out armed with a SUPER-SHOTGUN!
Robntik shoots him down anyways.
Robotnik: Take that son!
Eddy: Yo! You! The lard man! You can't just wreck my store like that!
Robotnik blows up the rest of the store with a Psyko-Plasmic MEGABOMB!>>
Jamie- Psyko-Plasmic? Shouldn’t it be Psycho?
Scott- And what does Psycho-Plasmic mean?
<<He blows up Mad Eddy and Ralph by launching hyperexplosive grenades at them.
Then
Robotnik
fires laser blasts all over the place, taking out the remaining freedom
fighters.
THE INVINCIBLE DESTORYER hovers over the remains of the freedom fighters.
Robotnik: HA HA HA hAAAA HAAAAA! I woN! HAHAHHHAA! I AM RULER OF
MOBIUS! NO ONE SHALL QUESTION
MY RULE NOW!!! HAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHA! Well I guess that's the end of
the fanfic and I WON! >>
David- Yay! We can leave now!
<<MUWHAHAHAHAHA!!! ...huh??!
Sonic slowly pulls himself to his feet.>>
David- This is going to be a while, isn’t it?
Jamie- yes it is.
<<Sonic: Come on botnik..LET'S RUMBLE
Robotnik: Ok. HA HA HA!! MEASLY RODENT!>>
Scott- Hedgehogs aren’t Rodents. Hedgehogs belong to the family Erinaceus,
while
Rodents belong to order order-
David-Shutup!
<< EAT THIS!!
Robotnik fires a nuclear warhead at Sonic!>>
David- Hmm...needs salt.
<<Sonic ducks, and the warhead blows up a garbage can behind him!
***FOOOOOOOOMMMMMMMMMM****
An aluminum can flys out and hits sonic in the head
<KLANG>
Sonic falls down, unconscious!>>
Scott- WHAT?! A Gargoyle’s razor metal wings only PAPER CUT him, a nuke is
quickly
SHAKEN OFF, but an aluminum can KNOCKS HIM OUT?!
<<Robonik charges up the laser cannons.
Robotnik: And now...THE FINAL CHAPTER....in the life....of....SONIC!
HAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHA!!!!
WOOHOHOHOHOHOHOHO!!! HEHEHEHEHEHEEEEE!!!
HARHAHRAHRAHRA!!!!>>
Austin- AHBLABLHBALHBALAHBALAHBALAHBLAAH!!
David- How do you do that?
Austin- Try babbling, except without moving your finger in front of your
outstretched lips.
Scott- Hey, he said a word longer than test-
David- Quiet, remember?
Scott- Oh yeah...
<<*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*
In the sky
The Trailer-Mart air delivery helicopter is flying through the air. It is
carrying Uncle Bob's
new trailer to it's destination. The helicopter's winch is hooked on to the
front bumper of
the trailer.
*KACHEW*
Suddenly, and without ANY WARNING AT ALL, the winch cable is severed by a stray
laser blast
from below! The trailer falls like a rock!
(inside the trailer)
Uncle Bob says "huh?">>
Jamie- Wouldn’t it be safer to just attach it to your car and drive it all the
way?
Scott- Not to mention a better show of common sense
<<*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*
Parking Lot
THE INVINCIBLE DESTROYER is hovering around in victory circles.
Robotnik: HAHHAHAHAH! We beat them We beat them!
Snivley: We are the greatest!
Robotnik pours some champagne.
Robotnik: A toast! To an enslaved Mobius!
Snivley: To an ennn..YAAAAAAAHHHHHH!!!!
Robotnik: Snivley, it's pronounced like this...EN-SAL-VAVED>>
Scott- No, it’s pronounced EN-SLAVED
<<Snivley points upwards. Robotnik looks up and sees a trailer falling down
towards
them.
Robotnik: Aw jeez man!
The trailer crushes the invincible destoryer!>>
David- But it’s invincible!
Jamie- Anything that can’t be properly spelled without a 3rd grade education
CAN’T be
invincible.
<<**KKKRRRUUUNNNNNNNCCCCHHHHHHHHH**
The propane tanks on the trailer explode!
**KKKKKKKFOSAAAJFHCFJSKLLSAUERIWIOQ*#@(((@OOOOOOOOOOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM!!!!!!!!!!!!>>
David- AHBLAHBLAHBLAHBALHBALHBALALHABLHA!!
Austin gives Davi an evil stare
<<!!!!!!!!!!*****
Uncle Bob climbs out of the burning wreckage. He sees his trailer totally
destroyed and
can
only think of one thing to say....
"FOCK YE!"
Sonic gets up and says "Uncle Bob! You saved the day!"
Tails says "Hooray for my Uncle! Uncle Bob prower!">>
Austin- But Tails died!
<<The crowd says "YAAAAAAY!!!"
Sally "Hooray! You are the hero of the day Bob!"
Bunnie: Y'all your just the greatest trailer-fox in the history of trailer
foxes dare ah say
it! MAH stars you is amazin' Uncle Bob!>>
Jamie- She’s a Southerner, not a redneck!
<<Dr Quack: QQUUUUACCCKKK BOB YAY QUUACCKKK!!!
Eddy: BWAA WOO WOO WOO WOO WOOOOOHAAAA!!!!
David Kintobor: Yes! Yahoo!
Edward Berrecca: Allright DuuUUUuoooUUUDDDEEE!!!>>
David- ENOUGH WITH THE OBSCURE FANFIC CHARACTERS!!
<<Everyone: HOORAY!
Sonic: LEt's all say hooray!
The phone rings
Sonic picks it up "Hello?"
FX Ferret says "Hooray!"
Sonic: Yo, FX!
FX: Yo Sonic, I'm coming back to mobius to celebrate the victory over Robotnik!
Crowd: YAAAAY!!!
Vision shows up and breaks out the PEZ.>>
David- Who’s Vision? And why is he giving out disgusting candy?
<<That night at Knothole villiage, the biggest celebration in the history of
mobius takes
place.
Singing, dancing, PEZ, lots of chili dogs, and a great time is had by all.>>
Scott- This is a rip off of the ending to Return of the Jedi!
<<Sonic says "THis sure is past cool! RIght, uncle bob?"
Bob says "ME TRAILER! ME BRAND NEW TRAILER! Nooooooooo!"
Everyone laughs.
*^*^*^*^*^*^*
THE END>>
David...
Jamie-Well?
<<*^*^*^*^*^*^*>>
Austin- They toke me Lucky Charms and raped me! I be so embarressed!
<<- sonic...@yahoo.com ->>
David- End of story. Can we leave now?
Jamie- Yes.
Jamie- So, what did we learn from this?
David- I learned that when you think a SonicFan story can’t get worse, it
usually does.
Scott- I learned that Austin really DOESN’T have a brain.
Austin- I learned that..uh... I didn’t learn anything...
Scott- AH! The projector’s on fire!!!
Jose Solano
----------------
"Bizarre? Yes. Weird? Yes. Pointless? Sometimes"
-Mach Hedgehog
Coming Soon: Jose's White Trash Can
Home of the Pikachu Death Gallery!