[FANFIC]: Shadowfox part I
SONIC FAN
Shadowfox pt. I
LEGAL STUFF
===========
Sonic and characters are copyright SEGA and archie comics. Other copyrights
belong ro their respective owners. Sonic Fan inc. slaims no ownership over
any part of the following story.
===========
From the author of Sonic Fights Robotnik, comes the next great epic of
Sonic
fan fiction!
SHADOWFOX
part I
by: SONIC FAN
sonic...@yahoo.com
http://members.xoom.com/SONIC_FAN/
&%&%&%&%&%&%&%&%&%&%&%&%&%&
The Moon
Robotnik's Moon Base
"Ahhh. Indeed I do enjoy a good vacation to the moon." said Robotnik
looking
out the window at mobius.
"Yes sir" snivelled Snivley
"I wonder whats going on right now..." said the Dr.
%&%&&%&%&%&%&%&%&%&&%&%&%&&%%
Knothole Villiage
It was a brigtht day in Knothole. Everything was peacdeful and there
were
no robot raids. Just regular day-to-day stuff with the Freedom Fighters.
Rotor
Bunnie, Sallys and some scientists were testing rotors new invention in
an
open feild.
"3, 2, 1, LAUNCH DATA PROBE!!!" said Rotor.
FOOOM! The disc shaped probe fires off the rocket pad westward. Sally
scopes
it out with the spyscope. "Nicole, begin data collection" she said
"AFFIRMATIVE SALLY. BEGINNING BINARY DATA RECEIVAL.
1001010101101010101101010"
Sonic "this is boring. way past yawn."
"WARNING. WARNING. INCOMING PROJECTILE!!"
*BOOOOOOMMMMKRAKKKKKKKKKAAAOOOWWWW*
"Probe down!" yells Bunnie
"Ahhh wer'e under attack! GET DOWN!!!" yells Rotor
Sally says to Nicole "Nicole! send signal to Knothole Center to sound the
SWAT missle alarm!"
Rotor hits the dirt. The alarm sounds
WOOOOORORRROOORRRROORRR
Knotholes inhabitants drop their activities and take cover. A ffamily of
rac
oons hides under an abandoned roof. Meanwhile another shot fires in!!
"Woah dude!" exclaims Sonic "This smells like a Buttnik attack!"
Sally crawls belly-in-the dirt to dodge fire, continuing to yell orders
at
Nicole. Sonic makes a running dash!! ZOOOOOM!!!
BLAM! BLAM<!
Sonic dodges left! "Woah! Time to juice it!!!"
Sonic jumps in the air spinning as a horizontal blade! BRRZZZ!!
FLYING BLADE STORM!!!
He falls out of the air slicing through bushes and lands right in front
of the
agressor!
"Huh?!? Uncle Bob?!?"
"Yeh. What the fook do ye wants?" said Bob
"Yo Bob whatchu doin'? We're under attack" says Sonic "Robotnik shot the
data
probe."
"Dater probe? HUH?!?!" says Bob
"Oh that was a data probe?" says Uncle Chuck "I thought is was a clay
pigeon
sonny boy!"
"Ach, we just is skeet shootin laddy" says Bob
Sally runs in! "pant pant pant. Yu! .... run! its an attack!"
"Heh. Don't worry Sal, Uncle Bob destroyed the probe." says Sonic
"Bob!" angers Sally "That probe took us 6 monthes to build. We were going
to
use it to spy on Robotropolis!"
"Well lassie" says Bob "Ah don't really give a bot's arse about yer
fookin
probe. So fock off, eh?"
"GRRRRRRRRRR" growls Sally, and kicks the dirt
"I wonder what important surveilance data we are missing out on" thinks
Sal
between clenched teeth
%&%&%&%&%&%&%&%&&%%&
Robotropolis
The Death Egg
Grounder and Scratch are in the control room staring at the screen. It is
the
test pattern for the Robotropolis Brodcasting Company.
"Hey Grounder" says Scrtach "This sucks heheh heh heh"
"Shutup bunghole" says Grounder
"Change the channel. this sucks" says Scratch
Gorunder *SMACKS* Scratch "Dumbass, Robotnik said we had to watch this,
so like
Sonic doesn't steal it, or something. uhhhh"
"Heheh ehheh hehe heh. Oh yeah. heh heh heh"
&%&%%&%&%&%&%&%&%&%&%&%
Knothole Village
A few days later
Sally is asleep. JUST THEN THE HUT STARTS SHAKING A A SHRILL CRY PEIRCES
THE
AIR!!
"What the!" says Sally "Its a bot invasion! Must.... warn....others!"
Sallys jumps out the window and rools into the bushes. But she looks up
and sees Uncle Bob playing the bagpipes on the roof
"BOB!!!!" says Sally "Why are you playing bagpipes on my roof at *checks
her
watch* 2:34 IN THE MORNING?!?!"
"Ah don't know!" yells Bob
"ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGG" growls Sally "That's it! I'm going to kick you
out of the Freedom Fighters!"
"No can do lassie!" says Bob "Ah have a contract, ye know!"
"He's right" says Uncle Chuck, arriving at the scene "Technically you
aren't
allowed to terminate is contract arbitrarily. Doing so would force you to
appear before the International Court of United Freedom Fighters"
"yeh" says Bob "So i'd gratley appreciate it if ye FOCK OFF!"
"Yo Bob!" says Sonic "Rockin'!"
"Encore? Ye go it lads! And ah one and ah two..."
More bagpipe music. Sally covers her ears. Sonic plays backup on guitar.
%&&%&%&%&%&%&%&%&%&%&%
The Mobius Mall
A few more days later
Its time again for the Freedom Fighters convention. Freedom Fighters from
around mobius are gathered here, including all the inhabitants of
Knothole,
the wolfpack, and the Chaotix. Vision, LORD OF PEZ, is about to begin the
traditional reading of the Declaration of the Rights of Furries
It's a good thing none of Robotniks forces are here. OR ARE THEY??? On
the
upper level..It's Packbell and Coconuts! LOOK OUT SONIC!
Sonic says "Man Sal, I hate these meetings."
"Quiet" says Sally "Don't make an embarassment of our organization"
"But Salleeeeeeee" whines Sonic
"WWW.SHHHHH.COM!" says Sally "... .ORG"
"Hip hop y'all" says Bunnie
"Say. Has anyone seen Antoinne" asks Tails
"Aheheheehehm" begins Vision "I hereby declare that Furries have these
funda
mental freedom.."
Packbell aims his sniper rifle. "Hahahaha" he cackels "Robotnik will
respect
me once I kill a bunch of Freedom Fighters. Hahaha no more toilet
cleaning duty
for me. That work is for robotocized furs!"
"Amen brother! you and me both!" says Coconuts
"Eeep! SONIC!!" yells hostage Antoinne
"Quiet you" says Packbell. He aims the sniper rifle
KA-POW!!! VISION IS HIT!
"EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEKKKKKKKKKKK" yells somebody
"VisioN!" yells sally in the panic "Somebody shot vision!"
"Man down" says Sonic running into the rescue "Vision! speak to me"
"wha...I'm allright Sonic. My PEZ amulet stopped the bullet" says Vis
They jump offstage narroly avading a second bullet!
"SONIIIC!" yells antoine from the upper level of the mall "AIDEZ MOI!
AIDEZ
MOOOIII!!! waaaahh!"
"Ant dude!" says Sonic "Yo we gotta help ant!"
Mall security to the rescue! Chaos ensues below. Half a million freedom
fighters
run around in dissarry.
"Sir!" reports the mall security scout "Our troops can't get to the upper
level.
Packbell has set the escalators on reverse!"
"Damn..." says the Captain. "We'll have to shoot at him from down here.
We're
at a disadvantage men. Arrrr..."
Sonic is running around. "Yo sal grab onto my hand" She does and Sonic
runs up
in the air gaining momentum to jump to the upper level!
BANG! A toucan bird freedom fighter gets shot in the head.
HEAD SHOT!
"EIIYYIIII!!!" says a startled shopper
Two pigs of the knothole freedom fighters get killed by one shot!
DOUBLE KILL!
Sonic jumps up onto the upper level!
Coconuts throws a monkey bomb down the escalator at some mall security
troops
KABLAMO!
MULTI-KILL!!!
Sonic is on one side of Packbell, Sally is on the other. Sonic spinblade
attacks!
Sally says "Nicole! Flame blast!" Nicole activates the flamethrower!
BUUURRRRRRRNNNN! SLAAASSSSHHHH!
MONKEY BOMB! BOOOOM! Sonic is down! Packbell elbows Slly! "oooof"
Sally falls. The gun is aimed at aintonnes head. "Hahahaha" says
Packebell
"you lose, Sonic"
Tails flys in! "Prepare for trouble Packard!" he says
"Rrrrr DON'T CALL ME THAT, FOOL!" Packbell arghs
NINJA HEAD KICK! Packbell is quick and he dodges
BLAM! Packbells head is shot clean off! By Uncle BOb's triple-barrel
shotgun!
"Hooray!" say the crowd
But Uncle Bob doesn't realize the battle is over. He fires a few more
shots,
one of which hits Antoinne square in the butt!
"SACREE BLEEEUUU!!!" says Antoinne jumping 500 ft in the air.
"Bob! Yo BoB!" says Sonic "Halt fire!"
"That's cease fire you moron SIR!" says a security cadet
In the commtion Coconuts throws a monkey smoke bomb! BLOFFF! He loads
Packbells
wreckage onto the hoverbike and gets away
COUGH COUGH HAAACKKKK COUG H ERRRK GASP COUGH ERRK
After the smoke clears Sally checks for cosualties
"Mon butteux! Owieeee" crys antoinne
"Medic!" calls Tails
Sally smiled to herself, thinking of something that could ruin Uncle
Bob's career
"Man" said Sonic "I can't beleive it. He didn't hit Geoffry Saint John!"
"Oh bite my excessivley handsom butt!" yells Geoffry from below
&%&%&%&%&&%&%&%&%&%&%&%&%
Back at Knothole celebration is in order. Uncle Bob is the hero! Three
Cheers
for uncle bob he's a jolly good fellow. The convention has been moved to
Knothole to avoid further robot attacks. Chris Petrucci is writing a song
about Uncle Bob and the battle of the shopping mall.
JUST THEN! Sally makes a shocking
annoucement!
"Uncle Bob!" says Sally "You are hereby banished from Knothole Villiage!"
SHOCK! went the crowd
"YE CAN NAY DO THA' TO ME LASS! I'M THE FOCKING HERO OF THE DAY!" retorts
Bob
"Oh yes I can" heh hehs Sally "You are in violation of section 54.G of
the
Knothole Freedom Fighters code. You shall not injure another freedom
fighters."
"AHHHH THA IS ROBBISH! IT WAS AN FOOKIN ACCIDENTAL!" yells Bob back
"I don't think so" said Sally "The battle was over and you shot antoinne.
I'm
the princess and I make the judgements around here"
"Well fine then. If tha is the way ye like it then i'll a leve!" says Bob
"Bob wait!" says Tails "You can't leave! It's night time and the forest
is
dark and scary"
"Ah wil be all right laddy. Ah got me triple barrel shootgun"
"But where will you go? Your trailer got blown up!"
"Ah will sleep in ah old stump ah guess. sigh."
Uncle Bob walks away. Tails is sad and angry
"I HATE YOU SALLY! STUPID SALLY ALWAYS PERSECUTING UNCLE BOB! I HATEYOU
HATEYOU!
HATE YOU!!!!" Tails storms away to his hut and slams the door
Sallys Hut
A few Minutes later
Sonic and Sally are arguing about uncle bobs exile.
"Yo Sal you had no juicy jammin right to do that to bob!" says Sonic
"Shut up Sonic!" said Sally "I can't put of with Bobs antics while i'm
trying to run a serious operation here. The fate of the planet depends on
it."
"IT was all your falut! I told you not to hold the convention at the
mall!
Robotnik is always attacking that place. Remember Blood and Metal? Sonic
Fights
Robotnik 3 *AND* 6?"
"Well its not like you never did anything wrong!" says Sally throwing a
pillow
at sonic "Remember the time you had a flashback to your dream while
Robotnik
was attacking us? You know, on the island?"
"Oh come on Sal!" Sonic yells "It's not my fault if my brain doesn't work
right
all the time!"
Tail's Hut
The same time
Tails packs up his knapsack. He is going to chase after Uncle Bob.
Grabbing
his flashlight and Katana he sets off into the woods in search of his
uncle.
Sonic and Sally are still arguing when SUDDENLY ROTOR JUMPS OUT OF THE
CAKE!
(it was meant for uncle bob, but Sally had confiscated it after he was
banished) "SONIC!!!!" screams Rotor
"AKKK!" says Sonic, falling into and expensive china cabinet
"Tails is missing!" says The Rote "Tails is missing!!! whall we doo???"
"Oh no!" crys Sally "Tails! innocent little Tails is in the woods alone"
"Hey SAL" says SOnic "He is a ninja master I THINK he can handle it"
"Sonic you know darn well that I forbid him to go on any missions! Its
too dangerous!"
"Maybe you should let him go sometime!!!" says Sonic
Rotor "HEY GUYS!!!!"
Sally "Sonic blah blah blah..."
Sonic "Sally blah blah blah"
Rotor "HEY!!!!! HEYY!!!!" (jumps up and down waving his arms)
Nicole says "EXCUSE ME, SALLY. EXCUSE ME, SALLY. EXCUSE ME, SALLY"
&%&%&&%&%&%&%&%&%&%&%&%
Day 5 of Tails trek into the Great Foretst
Still no sign of Uncle Bob. Where could he have gone? It's getting dark
now
so tails sets up camp.
"Man" grumbles Tails "I wish I brought something besides peanut butter
and jelly
sandwiches."
Tails notices an apple tree. Using his Katana he jumps up and slices one
off!
*CRRREEEEEEEK RUSTLE***
"Huh?!?!?!" startles Tails "What was THAT???"
"Probably nothing" He walks over to the river to fill his canteen. In the
water
he sees a reflection of a kitsune shadow. Spinning around he is face to
face
with a pitch black fox, creature of the night!!!
"AHHHHHH!!!!" excaimed Tails!
The shadow creature attacks. Tails backfips and picks up his Katana!
KA-CHING!
They battle! The shadow punches at Tails, he dodges, countering with a
kick
but the shadow ducks, Tails is unexpecting the
SHADOW UPPERCUT!
Missing tails by fractions of a hair Tails slashes wildly, dodging kicks,
he spins upside down onto a tree branch. Charges up his power and...
LIGHTNING BLADE!
The shot misses and the shadow flies up they exchange kicks and punches,
Tails
is knocked down over the water, he flies up before he hits water. Tails
attacks!
WATER SLASH!!
A thunderous wave roars at shadow but he dodges at the last second by
going
underwater.
tails tenses and....
SEA TYPHOON!!! A colum of water is heading towards Tails at lighting
speed.!
He flies up up up and BLADE SPINS! Landing on the ground he quickly
recovers and
FLAME SLICE!!!
He slices a tree and it falls over, on fire! Its between him and the
shadow,
theshadow disappears into the woods
"pant! pant! pant!" says Tails "what the heck was that thing???"
&%&%&%&%&%&%&%&%&%&%&%&%
Robotropolis
The Robotix Lab
Coconuts and some SWATS are trying to repair Packbell
"This is bad" said Coco "His CPU core is heavily damaged. We'll need a
replacement
processor"
"DRRRRROOONNN" says SWAT #372374 "THAT IS NOT POSSIBLE AT THIS TIME. WE
HAVE
NO SPARE ANDROID CPUS IN STOCK"
Coconuts gazes at the forcefeild surrounding a computer chip
(flashback)
Robotnik: Listen up bumblebots. DO NOT touch this chip. I am using it in
the
Mega-Tankbot LX0-42.
Coconuts: (raises his hand) question sir!
Robotnik: rrrggg. What is it, monkey boy?
Coconuts: Is it a potato chip?
Robotnik: (pounds Coconuts flat with a hammer) No. idiot.
(end flashback)
Coconuts thinks "hmmmm. This must be a super-advanced chip. If I used it
in
Packbell he would become a Super Packbell"
Coconuts leaps onto the operating table "That's it! Hang on Packbell old
buddy!
I'll fix you yet! SWAT bot!"
"YES?"
"REMOVE THE CHIP
"AH...AH>>> BUT DROOOONE ROBOTNIK SAID..."
"You fool! Robotnik treats you like a worthless automation! Give me the
chip,
the revolution is to begin!"
"UHHH....OK"
&%&%&%&%&%&%&%&%&%&%&%&
THE END
of part one
The Story concludes in part II of
SHADOWFOX
James Coyote Calhoun
2000, 989 Studios' janitor SONIC FAN recorded this transmission from
killer space ferrets in the alt.fan.sonic-hedgehog Nebula...
>SONIC FAN PRESENTS....
>Shadowfox pt. I
Heyyyy... we had a guy who went by the name Shadowfox posting here a little
while back. And he disappeared just shortly before Sonicfan started
posting...
AAAGGGGGHHHH!!! SHADOWFOX IS A SONICFAN SOCK PUPPET!!!
AND THAT SCARES ME MORE THAN THE STORY DID!!!
--
. ' _. ( .| James "Coyote" Calhoun {coy...@cunning.co.uk}
.,/`. )''. ,/| .:| http://coyote.50megs.com |:.
_\__`/ |__,/__|"EYE DECLAIR KNOW CORECCT SPLELING FOUR THEE NXT THOUSEND
.,_f_)\.. ..|YEERS!" proclamed Knig Badspelor Teh Frist! --Kibo
Toni Ferraro
beginner and pathetic, that I need someone to rescue meee!!! >.<
-------------------
~Toni Ferraro
Creator of the Sonic FanFiction Corner
Producer and Director of NAoStH
http://www.dreamteamzone.org/amy/naosth/naosth.html
Smiley
@news.psi.ca> on helpless AFSHers. Rescue teams had this to say:
>Sally runs in! "pant pant pant. Yu! .... run! its an attack!"
Wha...?! I send in eleven boxtops, three coupons and eight hundred tickets
from Fun World... and IcE still gets mentioned in SONICFAN fanfic before I
do? *grumble grumble*
>It's a good thing none of Robotniks forces are here. OR ARE THEY??? On
>the upper level..It's Packbell and Coconuts! LOOK OUT SONIC!
Sadly enough, this sounds a lot like your usual "Next time... on Dragon
Ball Z!" announcement.
>"Sir!" reports the mall security scout "Our troops can't get to the
>upper level. Packbell has set the escalators on reverse!"
>"Damn..." says the Captain. "We'll have to shoot at him from down here.
>We're at a disadvantage men. Arrrr..."
Sadly enough, this sounds a lot like the help the police usually give you
in Sonic-type games...
These thoughts have no middle or end.
--
-Smiley
+ Official Member of the AFSH Elite Council of Pointless
+ Leader of the Vanilla Pudding Brigade
+ Wearer of the Bucket of we!T and the Pants of Melodrama
"Pointlessness be ado'ed, spammin' be abho'ed."
-Rule #7, AFSH Cribpage
ShadowFox
"SONIC FAN" <sonic...@yahoo.com> wrote in message
news:MPG.13644ab8c...@news.psi.ca...
ShadowFox
"James "Coyote" Calhoun" <coy...@cunning.co.uk> wrote in message
news:8F18F47FDc...@207.106.92.14...
> The CIA, NSA, PGP and NASCAR don't want you to know that on 16 Apr
> 2000, 989 Studios' janitor SONIC FAN recorded this transmission from
> killer space ferrets in the alt.fan.sonic-hedgehog Nebula...
>
> >SONIC FAN PRESENTS....
> >Shadowfox pt. I
>
ShadowFox
"Toni Ferraro" <soni...@aol.com> wrote in message
news:20000417123225...@ng-fw1.aol.com...
> Will SOMEONE please take care of this?? I'd MiST it, but my MST skills
are so
> beginner and pathetic, that I need someone to rescue meee!!! >.<
>
murder.
James Coyote Calhoun
2000, 989 Studios' janitor ShadowFox recorded this transmission from
killer space ferrets in the alt.fan.sonic-hedgehog Nebula...
>I'm still here, just lurking for the most part.
Oh.
And your headers don't match Sonicfan's either...
Sorry, false alarm.
ShadowFox
1. Research the names you're going to use. Make sure you're not insulting
someone with your drivel.
2. Cut back on the faked curses. No StH fanfic worthy of being called
quality uses them.
3. At least get the characters' personalities right.
4. Avoid using all the common cliches.
5. Don't overload a story with famous sayings from movies. It makes you look
dumb.
6. There would be a lot more, but with the first 5 all over the place, I
couldn't stomach any more of this story.
ShadowFox
> The CIA, NSA, PGP and NASCAR don't want you to know that on 17 Apr
> 2000, 989 Studios' janitor ShadowFox recorded this transmission from
> killer space ferrets in the alt.fan.sonic-hedgehog Nebula...
>
> >I'm still here, just lurking for the most part.
>
> Oh.
>
> And your headers don't match Sonicfan's either...
>
> Sorry, false alarm.
>
Gah! you actually thought I was that... that... THAT?!?!? I may not be a
regular poster, but I certainly don't suck that much arse.
Maybe we should reserve Louis' noose for this guy... I'd usually encourage
someone to write and get better, but this just needs to be condemned.
The Chaos Emerald
Smiley babbled:
>SONIC FAN was caught dumping chemical <MPG.13644ab8caa43b3d989688
>@news.psi.ca> on helpless AFSHers. Rescue teams had this to say:
>
>>the upper level..It's Packbell and Coconuts! LOOK OUT SONIC!
>
>Ball Z!" announcement.
You'd love DBZ Remix, then. It's a great parody of DBZ.
http://somerandomguy.homepage.com/dbzrewrite/
>Will Gokou and Piccolo defeat Raditz and save the planet Earth? Find
>out on the next exiting episode of Dragon Ball Z rewrite, "Raditz is
>defeated."
That's still my favorite line.
/-----\ The Chaos Emerald
\* * */ Maintainer of The Hidden Palace, the only Sonic site with
* \ / * Chao downloads constantly being updated!!
* |^^^^^| * http://www.hidden-palace.com
Anti-The Super Sonic Zone! Do not goto that hypocrytical site!
---------------------------------------------------------------------
"There's a relatively high level of cross-company sex going on in the
[video game] industry these days..." - VOOT
"#define QUESTION ((bb) || !(bb)) - Shakespeare." - CitizenC
KT
<Shadow...@hotmail.com> wrote...
>Do me a favor. Before you write a story, follow a few guidelines.
>6. There would be a lot more, but with the first 5 all over the place, I
>couldn't stomach any more of this story.
You've never encountered sonicFAN before, have you ^_^;;;
--
Katy Coope, popple at large
James Coyote Calhoun
space ferrets in the alt.fan.sonic-hedgehog Nebula...
>>Do me a favor. Before you write a story, follow a few guidelines.
>><Snip>
>>
>>6. There would be a lot more, but with the first 5 all over the
>>place, I couldn't stomach any more of this story.
>
> You've never encountered sonicFAN before, have you ^_^;;;
Ah, you know how these rookies are, KT. Eventually he'll learn.
James Coyote Calhoun
killer space ferrets in the alt.fan.sonic-hedgehog Nebula...
>Maybe we should reserve Louis' noose for this guy... I'd usually
>encourage someone to write and get better, but this just needs to be
>condemned.
You really are new here, aren't you?
Maybe I better give you the drill... Sonicfan has been around for quite a
while. He's written somewhere in upwards of 12 fanfics, many of which have
been used as successful MiSTing fodder. Many people believe that he is
actually a parody writer making fun of some of the sillier elements of Sonic
fandom, but if that were the case then the joke was been stretched pretty
thin.
Oh, and "FOCK YOU!!!" has become an acceptable substitute for profanity
around here, so best learn to live with it.
ShadowFox
> The CIA, NSA, PGP and NASCAR don't want you to know that on 17 Apr
> space ferrets in the alt.fan.sonic-hedgehog Nebula...
>
> >><Snip>
> >>
> >>6. There would be a lot more, but with the first 5 all over the
> >>place, I couldn't stomach any more of this story.
> >
> > You've never encountered sonicFAN before, have you ^_^;;;
>
> Ah, you know how these rookies are, KT. Eventually he'll learn.
I hope so. If not, I'm going to rip him a new butthole just for stealing my
name.
ShadowFox
> The CIA, NSA, PGP and NASCAR don't want you to know that on 17 Apr
> killer space ferrets in the alt.fan.sonic-hedgehog Nebula...
>
> >encourage someone to write and get better, but this just needs to be
> >condemned.
>
> You really are new here, aren't you?
>
> Maybe I better give you the drill... Sonicfan has been around for quite a
> while. He's written somewhere in upwards of 12 fanfics, many of which have
> been used as successful MiSTing fodder. Many people believe that he is
> actually a parody writer making fun of some of the sillier elements of
Sonic
> fandom, but if that were the case then the joke was been stretched pretty
> thin.
>
> Oh, and "FOCK YOU!!!" has become an acceptable substitute for profanity
> around here, so best learn to live with it.
I've been around for a while, I just haven't bothered to read half the
postings. This one just happened to have caught my eye. I know he's been
around for a while, but I didn't realize the writings were this bad. I know
we have to get along with semi-curses, but that doesn't mean they fit in a
story.
ShadowFox
"KT" <Ka...@coopefamily.demon.co.uk> wrote in message
news:VwDghEAr...@coopefamily.demon.co.uk...
> <Snip>
> >6. There would be a lot more, but with the first 5 all over the place, I
> >couldn't stomach any more of this story.
>
> You've never encountered sonicFAN before, have you ^_^;;;
heh.. Nope. I've pretty much ignored things other people condemned moments
after it was posted.
ShadowFox
> The CIA, NSA, PGP and NASCAR don't want you to know that on 17 Apr
> 2000, 989 Studios' janitor ShadowFox recorded this transmission from
> killer space ferrets in the alt.fan.sonic-hedgehog Nebula...
>
> >doesn't mean they fit in a story.
>
>
> Look, we've tried to discuss the matter with him several times, but he
> doesn't listen... he just goes about his merry way writing fanfics left
and
> right. There's no point in trying to reason with him; just smile and nod,
> then slowly back away.
There's always that 'block sender' button held in reserve for those that
deserve the dishonor.
Maybe he just does it to tick everyone off.
ShadowFox
> The CIA, NSA, PGP and NASCAR don't want you to know that on 17 Apr
> 2000, 989 Studios' janitor ShadowFox recorded this transmission from
> killer space ferrets in the alt.fan.sonic-hedgehog Nebula...
>
> >stealing my name.
>
he
> was stealing it from you directly, if he even intended to steal it at all.
That doesn't mean I'm not still in the mood for a good lynching. ;)
ShadowFox
> The CIA, NSA, PGP and NASCAR don't want you to know that on 17 Apr
> 2000, 989 Studios' janitor ShadowFox recorded this transmission from
> killer space ferrets in the alt.fan.sonic-hedgehog Nebula...
>
> >moments after it was posted.
>
Probably, but when scanning through 1000 posts on different NGs every day,
it makes it hard to stop and read each one. Maybe I should pay more
attention to some things here, and get a better laugh out of it.
ShadowFox
> The CIA, NSA, PGP and NASCAR don't want you to know that on 17 Apr
> 2000, 989 Studios' janitor ShadowFox recorded this transmission from
> killer space ferrets in the alt.fan.sonic-hedgehog Nebula...
>
>
wasn't
> even about you,it was about... um, uh, hang on...
I know. It was a joke! If it _was_ about me, it wouldn't be...
>
> [goes back to re-read the story and attempt to find a shred of plot]
>
> [45 minutes later...]
>
> Okay, I think I've got it. The story is about...
>
> . . . .
>
> Oh dammit, I haven't got a focking clue what that giant pile of word salad
> was supposed to be about. But I'm pretty sure it wasn't about you. Just
trust
> me on that one.
It was a befuddled attempt to create a work based some of the worst comic
issues/series characters I've ever seen/read/??? Just like you said. Word
salad. Oh, and I'm sure you could get a side of brain soup if you try real
hard to understand it.
Allison Fleury
James "Coyote" Calhoun <coy...@cunning.co.uk> wrote in message
news:8F19D6EEFc...@207.106.92.14...
> The CIA, NSA, PGP and NASCAR don't want you to know that on 17 Apr
> 2000, 989 Studios' janitor ShadowFox recorded this transmission from
> killer space ferrets in the alt.fan.sonic-hedgehog Nebula...
>
> >That doesn't mean I'm not still in the mood for a good lynching. ;)
>
> Sheesh, you're in a bit of a mood today, aren't you? I mean, the story
wasn't
> even about you,it was about... um, uh, hang on...
>
>
> [45 minutes later...]
>
> Okay, I think I've got it. The story is about...
>
> . . . .
>
> Oh dammit, I haven't got a focking clue what that giant pile of word salad
> was supposed to be about. But I'm pretty sure it wasn't about you. Just
trust
> me on that one.<<<
I liked it. It was quite inspiring to see such fine work.
---Ali
Mr. Encyclopedia
ShadowFox <ShadowFox_79(at)hotmail.com> wrote in message
news:ubR5R5Kq$GA.306@cpmsnbbsa04...
: Hey! Watch whose screen name you steal before posting a story.
:
:
: "SONIC FAN" <sonic...@yahoo.com> wrote in message
: news:MPG.13644ab8c...@news.psi.ca...
: > SONIC FAN PRESENTS....
: > Shadowfox pt. I
Wow. The story wasn't any better the second time.
*eyeroll*
--
Mr. Encyclopedia
MEGASIG 2.0 (under construction)
-
"Soylent Green - Now with more girls!" -From the Simpsons
-
"Normal is only a setting on my Dryer." - A.J. Lenell
-
"Sir! Our troops can't get to the upper level. Packbell has set the
escalators on reverse!" - from Shadowfox
James Coyote Calhoun
2000, 989 Studios' janitor ShadowFox recorded this transmission from
killer space ferrets in the alt.fan.sonic-hedgehog Nebula...
>I know we have to get along with semi-curses, but that
>doesn't mean they fit in a story.
That's just it though... Sonicfan came up with it in the first place.
Look, we've tried to discuss the matter with him several times, but he
doesn't listen... he just goes about his merry way writing fanfics left and
right. There's no point in trying to reason with him; just smile and nod,
then slowly back away.
--
James Coyote Calhoun
2000, 989 Studios' janitor ShadowFox recorded this transmission from
killer space ferrets in the alt.fan.sonic-hedgehog Nebula...
>I hope so. If not, I'm going to rip him a new butthole just for
>stealing my name.
I've seen at least 6 or 7 people in other NGs using that name, so I doubt he
was stealing it from you directly, if he even intended to steal it at all.
--
James Coyote Calhoun
2000, 989 Studios' janitor ShadowFox recorded this transmission from
killer space ferrets in the alt.fan.sonic-hedgehog Nebula...
>heh.. Nope. I've pretty much ignored things other people condemned
>moments after it was posted.
Well, you're missing out on a lot of fun then...
--
James Coyote Calhoun
2000, 989 Studios' janitor ShadowFox recorded this transmission from
killer space ferrets in the alt.fan.sonic-hedgehog Nebula...
>There's always that 'block sender' button held in reserve for those
>that deserve the dishonor.
Whatever revs your engine.
>Maybe he just does it to tick everyone off.
Doubt it. Besides, if he is he isn't doing a very good job.
Oh look, the Hitler^H^H^H^Hstory Channel is showing that alien autopsy video.
Gee, that's a good thing too, 'cause I missed it the first 45 times that all
the major networks showed it.
James Coyote Calhoun
2000, 989 Studios' janitor ShadowFox recorded this transmission from
killer space ferrets in the alt.fan.sonic-hedgehog Nebula...
>That doesn't mean I'm not still in the mood for a good lynching. ;)
Sheesh, you're in a bit of a mood today, aren't you? I mean, the story wasn't
even about you,it was about... um, uh, hang on...
[goes back to re-read the story and attempt to find a shred of plot]
[45 minutes later...]
Okay, I think I've got it. The story is about...
. . . .
Oh dammit, I haven't got a focking clue what that giant pile of word salad
was supposed to be about. But I'm pretty sure it wasn't about you. Just trust
me on that one.
--
James Coyote Calhoun
from killer space ferrets in the alt.fan.sonic-hedgehog Nebula...
>I liked it. It was quite inspiring to see such fine work.
ALI'S GONE LOCO AGAIN!!!! RUN FOR THE HILLS!!!
AIIIEIEIEIEIEEEEEEEE!!!1!11!!11(*$%&$
-NO CARRIER-
Mr. Encyclopedia
: 2000, 989 Studios' janitor ShadowFox recorded this transmission from
: killer space ferrets in the alt.fan.sonic-hedgehog Nebula...
: >That doesn't mean I'm not still in the mood for a good lynching. ;)
:
: Sheesh, you're in a bit of a mood today, aren't you? I mean, the story
wasn't
: even about you,it was about... um, uh, hang on...
:
: [goes back to re-read the story and attempt to find a shred of plot]
:
: [45 minutes later...]
:
: Okay, I think I've got it. The story is about...
:
: . . . .
:
: Oh dammit, I haven't got a focking clue what that giant pile of word salad
: was supposed to be about. But I'm pretty sure it wasn't about you. Just
trust
: me on that one.
Letsee... Packbell decided he wanted to... to do somthing, and then shadofox
attacked tails.
I think.
^IcE^
(James "Coyote" Calhoun) wrote:
> That's just it though... Sonicfan came up with it in the first place.
>
> Look, we've tried to discuss the matter with him several times, but he
> doesn't listen... he just goes about his merry way writing fanfics left
> and
> right. There's no point in trying to reason with him; just smile and nod,
> then slowly back away.
Well, you can always try to read, then laugh your head off, and close
the message window. Or go on the first 10 lines and decide your eyes
need a rest and close the message window... etc
-^IcE^
-Official Userful Poster of AFSH
-*yawn*
ShadowFox
"Mr. Encyclopedia" <Ofla...@tbcnet.com> wrote in message
news:sfn9pr...@corp.supernews.com...
>
> ShadowFox <ShadowFox_79(at)hotmail.com> wrote in message
> news:ubR5R5Kq$GA.306@cpmsnbbsa04...
> : Hey! Watch whose screen name you steal before posting a story.
> :
>
> *eyeroll*
Oops. Sorry.
Dean Rivers
to try to look like a film critic. He sits in a revolving chair, picks
up an overtly-sized glass of some alcoholic concoction and starts to
prattle with a background of an ornate set of oak cabinets, filled to
the brim with leather-coated books*
...well, here, at AFSH we realise every fanfic is unique, and this one
is no different to any other. Again, "SONIC FAN" presented another
fanfic that had, rather ubiquitously, 'JUMPED OUT OF HIS BRAIN !!!'
Let us look into the wonderful world of fanfics at the 'Positive
Fanfic Review Show'. Because in this case, "Shadowfox" is not a story,
it is an experience that could be savoured.
The first actual scene has a mêlée of insulting dialogue, expensive
special effects and Freedom Fighters. The general emotion between the
characters seems to balance perfectly.
*Dean opens the book, and reads an extract*
<"Heh. Don't worry Sal, Uncle Bob destroyed the probe." says Sonic
"Bob!" angers Sally "That probe took us 6 monthes to build. We were
going
to use it to spy on Robotropolis!"
"Well lassie" says Bob "Ah don't really give a bot's arse about yer
fookin probe. So fock off, eh?" >
This simple style of conversations doesn't fit in with the traditional
'de rigeur' of conventions, it is obvious the author is aiming for a
niche market with his work. This market, full of MSTers is grateful
indeed for the great gift given by this "Sonic Fan".
*Dean opens the book again, scans it for the exact extract, and
recites it concisely*
< "Hey Grounder" says Scrtach "This sucks heheh heh heh"
"Shutup bunghole" says Grounder
"Change the channel. this sucks" says Scratch
Gorunder *SMACKS* Scratch "Dumbass, Robotnik said we had to watch
this,
so like Sonic doesn't steal it, or something. uhhhh"
"Heheh ehheh hehe heh. Oh yeah. heh heh heh" >
Not only does the story feature cameos, but it features direct
'parodies' of traditional jokes, which I believe, gives the entire act
of fanfic-creating a new dimension of inter-textuality.
But still, the graphic images this work conveys really do scream out
at you, the job of creating a chaotic mass of activity is created with
fresh storylines and effervescent, fresher 'character personalities'.
It was originally believed Michael Crichton gave a helping hand to our
friend here, and far be it for me to add to rumours, but I can see
their point. The entire way the story unravels itself like a loo roll
is simply Crichton-esque in its attitude.
< "BOB!!!!" says Sally "Why are you playing bagpipes on my roof at
*checks her watch* 2:34 IN THE MORNING?!?!"
"Ah don't know!" yells Bob
"ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGG" growls Sally "That's it! I'm going to kick
you out of the Freedom Fighters!"
"No can do lassie!" says Bob "Ah have a contract, ye know!" >
Even the 'chapter breaks', as an associate once noted (which I
personally agree with), reek of "class; a real mixture of roses,
absinthe, corduroy, paint, fork and lapel."
< %&&%&%&%&%&%&%&%&%&%&% >
"%&&%&%&%&%&%&%&%&%&%&%" indeed. Great stuff so far.
The dramatic text used to convey panic and potential danger is
interesting, not clichèd in any way, and thoroughly liekable. And more
of this later.
< On the upper level..It's Packbell and Coconuts! LOOK OUT SONIC! >
Even the big industries get a mention in the story, allowing a subtle
amount of gritty realism to enter the story like oxygen through a
kestrel's beak.
< "WWW.SHHHHH.COM!" says Sally "... .ORG" >
However, at times it seems like the graphic content of the story makes
the "Universal" rating the fanfic got, a little on the wrong side. Not
that that's a bad thing, children will learn about these incidents
soon enough in life...
< KA-POW!!! VISION IS HIT!
"EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEKKKKKKKKKKK" yells somebody
"VisioN!" yells sally in the panic "Somebody shot vision!"
"Man down" says Sonic running into the rescue "Vision! speak to me"
"wha...I'm allright Sonic. My PEZ amulet stopped the bullet" says Vis
>
The portrayal of near-death experiences like that really do bring a
tear to my eye. The dialogue between the two characters at this time
really does scare me - how brutal and graphic it gets. But as brutal
as it is, it is truthful and provided an open mind can be kept during
these periods, the actual work shines on like a 100 watt lightbulb in
a white room.
< "Sir!" reports the mall security scout "Our troops can't get to the
upper level.
Packbell has set the escalators on reverse!"
"Damn..." says the Captain. "We'll have to shoot at him from down
here.
We're at a disadvantage men. Arrrr..." >
The humour of the story is an acquired taste, like to the Pratchett
"yes-I-know-its-funny" style, in a way: but without the self-appraised
cockiness in the "jokes". I put this in inverted commas as the jokes
fit in the text itself seamlessly; in fact you'd almost believe
they're not jokes.
< "Man" said Sonic "I can't beleive it. He didn't hit Geoffry Saint
John!"
"Oh bite my excessivley handsom butt!" yells Geoffry from below >
And that isn't a one-off, no. Look, another one.
< Sonic and Sally are still arguing when SUDDENLY ROTOR JUMPS OUT OF
THE CAKE! >
How can you not live in fear every time you see a Battenburg from now
on?
Ah, and another example of the brilliantly original text used:
< Sally "Sonic blah blah blah..."
Sonic "Sally blah blah blah"
Rotor "HEY!!!!! HEYY!!!!" (jumps up and down waving his arms) >
However, the action sequences are similar to Stephen King's works, the
atmosphere, depth and general fear accomplished by the author is
unsurpassed by any fanfic I have read on this day.
< Spinning around he is face to face with a pitch black fox, creature
of the night!!!
"AHHHHHH!!!!" excaimed Tails!
The shadow creature attacks. Tails backfips and picks up his Katana!
KA-CHING!
They battle! The shadow punches at Tails, he dodges, countering with a
kick but the shadow ducks, Tails is unexpecting the SHADOW UPPERCUT!
Missing tails by fractions of a hair Tails slashes wildly, dodging
kicks, he spins upside down onto a tree branch. Charges up his power
and... LIGHTNING BLADE!
The shot misses and the shadow flies up they exchange kicks and
punches, Tails is knocked down over the water, he flies up before he
hits water. Tails attacks!
WATER SLASH!!
A thunderous wave roars at shadow but he dodges at the last second by
going underwater. tails tenses and....
SEA TYPHOON!!! A colum of water is heading towards Tails at lighting
speed.! He flies up up up and BLADE SPINS! Landing on the ground he
quickly recovers and FLAME SLICE!!!
He slices a tree and it falls over, on fire! >
If I was to give this book a mark out of musical bands, this
definitely deserves a 'Mighty Mighty Bosstones' rating. And I'll have
to end on this from "Sonic Fan". Even though fanfic critics always say
something after the final extract anyway.
< Robotnik: Listen up bumblebots. DO NOT touch this chip. I am using
it in
the Mega-Tankbot LX0-42.
Coconuts: Is it a potato chip?
Robotnik: (pounds Coconuts flat with a hammer) No. idiot. >
Good day.
--
Dean Rivers
Smiley
<snip>
[just stares for a second, then turns to Mark]
...what was the name of that chemical you put in his cereal again?
--
-Smiley
+ Official Member of the AFSH Elite Council of Pointless
+ Leader of the Vanilla Pudding Brigade
+ Wearer of the Bucket of we!T and the Pants of Melodrama
"Pointlessness be ado'ed, spammin' be abho'ed."
-Rule #7, AFSH Cribpage
Mark Whickman
His fleet crushed under the merciless pounding of Blackstone 3, Smiley
<Smil...@earthlink.net> is brought up to throne of Warmaster whickman on
the Bridge of the Battleship "Eternity of pain" to plead for mercy.
> Dean Rivers was caught dumping chemical
<8din04$s6l$3...@newsg2.svr.pol.co.uk>
> on helpless AFSHers. Rescue teams had this to say:
>
> <snip>
>
> [just stares for a second, then turns to Mark]
>
> ...what was the name of that chemical you put in his cereal again?
>
Compound X
--
~~>:-<
Visit my Website! http://go.to/ribfaces_lair
#########################################################
"Hah! Your quest is over blood angel. I am the only destiny that awaits you
here. Yield
to me, son of sanguinius. Surrender yourself body and soul to the power of
CHAOS!"
"What da ZoG!?"
"The more I see, the more I know - The more I know, the less I understand."
Changingman
"That's it! Be afraid! You all taste so much better when you're afraid!"
- Pennywise.
"The concept of a divine creator is irrelevant to our happiness."
Holder of an award for Pointlessness. (Thanks to the great council)
Member of the Tea League!
Mad Chaos Mutant! Leader of the Spawns 'R' us club.
Mail Me! Markwh...@blackfortress.co.uk Please...
or
see some of my Fanfics at
http://www.geocities.com/TimesSquare/Lair/9161/writers.htm
Mark Whickman
His fleet crushed under the merciless pounding of Blackstone 3, Allison
Fleury <lupi...@aol.com> is brought up to throne of Warmaster whickman on
the Bridge of the Battleship "Eternity of pain" to plead for mercy.
>
> James "Coyote" Calhoun <coy...@cunning.co.uk> wrote in message
> news:8F19D6EEFc...@207.106.92.14...
> > The CIA, NSA, PGP and NASCAR don't want you to know that on 17 Apr
> > 2000, 989 Studios' janitor ShadowFox recorded this transmission from
> > killer space ferrets in the alt.fan.sonic-hedgehog Nebula...
> >
> > >That doesn't mean I'm not still in the mood for a good lynching. ;)
> >
> > Sheesh, you're in a bit of a mood today, aren't you? I mean, the story
> wasn't
> > even about you,it was about... um, uh, hang on...
> >
> > [goes back to re-read the story and attempt to find a shred of plot]
> >
> > [45 minutes later...]
> >
> > Okay, I think I've got it. The story is about...
> >
> > . . . .
> >
> > Oh dammit, I haven't got a focking clue what that giant pile of word
salad
> > was supposed to be about. But I'm pretty sure it wasn't about you. Just
> trust
> > me on that one.<<<
>
> I liked it. It was quite inspiring to see such fine work.
>
>
Quick! Somebody rewire Allison!.