Re: Lame, disappointing birthday presents
Miss Elaine Eos
<bf3a6b5c-cd2f-46b8...@z9g2000yqi.googlegroups.com>,
Pourquoispas <Rob...@gmail.com> wrote:
> I know, I know. "It's the thought that counts," the thought - the
> impetus - that physically manifests itself in presenting presents to
> you on the occasion of your birthday.
>
> But, frankly, what if the present is something you don't like, when
> the gift-giver should have known better, but apparently is insensitive
> to your preferences?
You're speaking of the occasion when the gift presented is a loud and
obvious token of lack-of-thought, presented merely out of some sense of
"obligation"...?
Sure, that happens. And the graceful will ooo and aah over it just as
if it was "what they always wanted", and still write a nice thank you
note the very next day.
> How to react???
>
> "Thank you for the wines! I love them!" (FAKE appreciation - then
> secretly give them away??)
While it's a nice touch, there's no need to add "I love them",
potentially giving the mixed message about your tastes. But, yes, you
do say "Thank you so much!" and act appreciative.
Regifting is tricky business. You might consider, instead, waiting
until you have company, and pouring some out for everyone. Another
chance to ooo and aah over your roommate's generosity. You can even
pour yourself a glass and take a sip -- it won't kill you. ADVANCED
TECHNIQUE: if you can manage it without even a hint of sarcasm, you can
try something like "hmmm, interesting; I don't believe I've had this
wine before", but you must be prepared for "do you like it?" and
similar, with a gracious response. (<thoughtful look>"I'm not sure,
I'll have to have a few more sips, over dinner..." is a safe bet, if you
don't want to lie, but you should make sure the message is upbeat: "I'm
always looking to expand my horizons -- thanks again!")
> ALSO ..... I have a 13-year-old retriever dog who is very elderly and
> failing, but I'm trying to keep her as happy and healthy as possible.
> Her teeth are worn down, so she likes only small, soft, chewy treats.
> The same housemate mentioned above does not "get" this, and brings her
> large, hard, oversized biscuit bones. She can't orally handle them and
> leaves them on the floor. I' ve explained this to the housemate, who
> apparently just doesn't understand.
"I understand that you mean well, but please do not give my dog that
sort of biscuit. In her frail condition, the vet suggests soft, chewy
treats, as the harder ones may harm her if she tries to swallow one."
If your roommate is the argumentative type -- one who insists "what?
Fang chews just fine -- look!" -- then just repeat your polite phrase "I
would prefer that you not feed my dog; thank you."
--
Please take off your pants or I won't read your e-mail.
I will not, no matter how "good" the deal, patronise any business which sends
unsolicited commercial e-mail or that advertises in discussion newsgroups.