Calvin on FZ Album Covers (Pt. 1)
Hanzo
In article <34333eb7...@news.p3.net>
cal...@RALF.com (Cal Schenkel) writes:
>
> Here's some brief comments & notes on FZ album covers that I worked
> on--with--or for--(take your pick) Frank Zappa. (and a few other ones I
> didn't actually work on but know a little about.
>
ausgeschnipeltes aber sehr sehr lesenswert
Now that's a coverstory. Thanx very much for this first hand
information, very entertaining read as well, of course I for one would
like to read all about it so if you want to elaborate further please go
ahead!
> (Where's Zoog's medicine?)
hanzo
Peter ™berg
cal...@RALF.com (Cal Schenkel) wrote:
Fillmore East
With only a couple of days to put something together, we decided on
the bootleg look.
I've always wondered about this one. Why did you and Frank decide to
make it look like a bootleg?
Was this Frank's reaction on the first bootlegs reaching the underground
market?
(I didn't think the first boots got released that early)
Peter
Biffyshrew
Johan Wikberg wrote:
> > Was this Frank's reaction on the first bootlegs reaching
> > the underground market? (I didn't think the first boots
> > got released that early)
>
>I don't think any Zappa/Mothers boots were released that early either.
The _200 Motels_ bootleg was already on the market by the summer
of 1971, when _Fillmore East_ came out. It was the first release on the
famous Trademark Of Quality piggy label.
Your pal,
Biffy the Elephant Shrew @}-`--}----
Visit me at http://members.aol.com/biffyshrew/biffy.html
"'Beside You' will attack your senses like the sudden sniff of a whore's
underwear."--Warner Bros. advertisement for Van Morrison, 1969
Johan Wikberg
Peter ™berg <PETE...@vbtn.sr.se> skrev i inlägg
<610613$3ht$1...@news.sr.se>...
> cal...@RALF.com (Cal Schenkel) wrote:
>
> > Fillmore East
> > With only a couple of days to put something together,
> > we decided on the bootleg look.
>
> I've always wondered about this one. Why did you and Frank
> decide to make it look like a bootleg?
(Maybe because they only had a couple of days to put something together.)
> Was this Frank's reaction on the first bootlegs reaching
> the underground market? (I didn't think the first boots
> got released that early)
I don't think any Zappa/Mothers boots were released that early either.
However, rock bootlegs were a firm reality by then. It was spearheaded by
Dylan, Beatles and Stones bootlegs in 1969-1970 (Great White Wonder, Get
Back, LiveR Than You'll Ever Be &c), and by 1971 there must have been well
over a dozen bootlegs out of Bob Dylan alone. As I understand it there was
quite a hoopla when it first got started.
--- Johan <wik...@mbox301.swipnet.se>
Cal Schenkel
Here's some brief comments & notes on FZ album covers that I worked
on--with--or for--(take your pick) Frank Zappa. (and a few other ones I
didn't actually work on but know a little about.
I started to put this list together when the 95 re-issues came out. Never
finished it, then I found it again when I was cleaning off some crap from
my hard drive last week. If there is actually any interest, I'll discuss
each cover separately in more depth on my website. If I ever get to the
point where I actually get around to having words & stuff like that on my
website. Which would likely be sometime after I actually (that's ACTUALLY)
finish that T-shirt thing... (maybe I'll actually work on that this
weekend instead of actually going to the beach. ...Maybe not
..obviously). #:>)
When I found out that Ryko was going to re-release the entire catalog
(late 1994) I remembered how pissed off I was about the cheeeeesy quality
of the packaging on the original go-round (chopped up art, lousy color
separations, missing credits, etc.) So I rented a car & drove up to Salem
& kicked Don Rose in the shins & said: "HEY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
To their credit, they let me fix things up a bit. (the ones I originally
had something to do with--I had no jurisdiction over the other releases).
===
(Numbers are Ryko 95 release- All dates here are for artwork only -from
memory, subject to correction).
95RR-inlay: indicates additional new material used on the inlay card on
the Ryko 95 release.
10503 WE'RE ONLY IN IT FOR THE MONEY
6-67 thru fall 67 -NY. Photo, photo-collage.
This was the first cover that I worked on. I had just started working for
FZ in spring (67), doing ads for "Absolutely Free", group photos, drum
heads, light show -various paraphernalia for "Pigs & Repugnant" (Garrick
Theater extended gig). Frank very carefully directed this package, I did
the plaster models, collage in background & supplied whatever else was
needed- with the help of Dick Roth at Queens Litho (they also printed "Sgt
Pepper"). Incidentally-- the "Only Money" cutout insert was actually
printed with "Sgt. Pepper’s" inserts on the same press sheet.
95 Ryko release restores the original cover, back cover, liner and cutout
sheet with some subtle changes. The inlay pictures are neverseenbefore
out-takes from the original Jerry Schatzberg photo session for the BC
(which is actually the inside-out left panel on the original, but the BC
on the earlier reissue... well, you know what I mean).
10504 LUMPY GRAVY
fall 67 -NY (Art Direction and interior art only -original FC, BC photos
supplied by Capitol Records previous to my involvement). Photo-collage.
I went to Europe Sept-Oct 67, with the first MOI tour as photographer and
on return used some of the photos in this interior. (and all them bowler
hat photos).
95RR-inlay: photo by CS from one of the recording (actually mixing?)
sessions at Apostolic (L to R- Richard Kunk, FZ, Don Preston).
10505 CRUSIN' WITH RUBEN & THE JETS
summer 68 -LA. Acrylic, pencil, collage, spray-paint.
Animopomorphized snouts courtesy Carl Barks. In spring of 68 Frank moved
the operation back to LA, and I took up residence in the tree-house at the
Log Cabin wherein I assembled this comic combo. (reference the Uncle Meat
story) Then I found some interesting trash on the hill up above the Log
Cabin where they were building roads. which started a diversion to
overlaying car parts diagrams on people's heads.
95RR-inlay: Jellyroll/Bop from promotional material .
10506/07 UNCLE MEAT
winter 68, 69 -LA. Assemblage, collage.
After everybody moved out of the Log Cabin, I found a space over this
blood-testing lab next to a famous hot dog stand on Melrose avenue that
used to be a dentist's office (need I say more?)
Well yes actually, but at a later date.
(This is also the place of genesis of many other gems of albumcoverdom
including Captain Beefheart's- "Trout Mask Replica" & "Wild Man Fisher
Pretties for You With A Real Knife!!")
95RR-inlay: 2 of the found Dentoid elements that were used in the cover
assemblage (turned into mush when they printed it with a scan instead of a
simple line shot.)
10508 HOT RATS
mid 69
Cover photos by Ed Caraeff of Miss Christine in an abandoned BeverlyHills
lilypond. Inside photos by CS (Euro-from first tour): Top #1- FZ on stage,
(probably) Amsterdam; 2,3-Apostolic Studios (or Mayfair, I'm not sure
which)("Frog Hollow" T-Shirt courtesy Richard Isgrigg's brother), NY; 4-
on the ferry to Goteborg, Sweden; 5- FZ at home. Bottom left- FZ & Ian at
Buckingham Palace; the live shot next to it is from (probably) Amsterdam;
bottom #3 at FZ's Charles St. apt. in NY. The Beefheart photo, as well as
the photos on Trout Mask (except cover) from the Magic Band
residence/studio in Woodland Hills, 1968/9 -by Ed Caraeff. Large FZ photo
by Bruce Linton. CS Ian Euro-photo, posterized by John Williams, who also
co-designed this album
package.
95RR-inlay: photo by CS of FZ & Miss Christine from a session at the Log
Cabin, summer 68.
10509 BURNT WEENY SANDWICH
Art early 67 -NY. Assemblage.
Layout by John Williams. The assemblage on this album cover was originally
done for an Eric Dolphy album (Moop Records) that never happened. So Frank
decided to use it here.
BC photo by CS of Ian chewing on the very corrugated sole of his very
tasty little sucker, from that first MOI Euro-tour. As well as the two
stage shots inside- (center right: rehearsal at Albert Hall). The shot of
Don (l) is from Apostolic Studios (solarized & developed in the bedroom
closet of Franks Charles St. NY apartment).
95RR-inlay: Previously unused promo-photo by Ed Caraeff of the ever
growing Mothers. (captured directly from the moldy contact sheet)
10511 CHUNGA'S REVENGE
1970 -LA. Acrylic
(Interior) illustrated studio riff (mutant industrial version).
95RR-inlay: Floor-scrap from rejected cover idea prelim.
10512 FILLMORE EAST
1971 -LA. Pencil.
With only a couple days to put something together, we decided on the
bootleg look.
95RR-inlay: features an ad from the campaign.
10515 JUST ANOTHER BAND FROM LA
1972 -LA. Mixed media on paper, animation cel; burger airbrushed by Sherm.
Asleep at the wheel fast food visions (see interior). Interior photo
self-portrait in my fake bedroom studio in Eagle Rock.
95RR-inlay: Billy the Mtn. hisself- fabricated storyboard drawing
(slightly visible over my head in interior photo).
Part 2 sometime soon. (Remind me).
--Calvin
excuse me, I need to go try to build an aircraft, a bridge, a vaccine, a
computer or something etc. etc.
Jasper Leach
In article <34333eb7...@news.p3.net>, cal...@RALF.com wrote:=
> 10506/07 UNCLE MEAT
>
> winter 68, 69 -LA. Assemblage, collage.
> After everybody moved out of the Log Cabin, I found a space over this
> blood-testing lab next to a famous hot dog stand on Melrose avenue that
> used to be a dentist's office (need I say more?)
> Well yes actually, but at a later date.
> (This is also the place of genesis of many other gems of albumcoverdom
> including Captain Beefheart's- "Trout Mask Replica" & "Wild Man Fisher
> Pretties for You With A Real Knife!!")
> 95RR-inlay: 2 of the found Dentoid elements that were used in the cover
> assemblage (turned into mush when they printed it with a scan instead of a
> simple line shot.)
Cal, I just annoyingly asked this publically on affz but What is the plot
(if there's any) of the movie of UNCLE MEAT?
What is the plot (if there's any) of the movie of UNCLE MEAT?
What is the plot (if there's any) of the movie of UNCLE MEAT?
What is the plot (if there's any) of the movie of UNCLE MEAT?
What is the plot (if there's any) of the movie of UNCLE MEAT?
What is the plot (if there's any) of the movie of UNCLE MEAT?
What is the plot (if there's any) of the movie of UNCLE MEAT?
What is the plot (if there's any) of the movie of UNCLE MEAT?
What is the plot (if there's any) of the movie of UNCLE MEAT?
What is the plot (if there's any) of the movie of UNCLE MEAT?
What is the plot (if there's any) of the movie of UNCLE MEAT?
Ok, I'll stop.....
!@#%$%#^#%@#%^!
--
--------asper the Notorious "Is this the real life-
| Is this just fantasy?"
| - Freddy Mercury, 1975
|
/
/
Johan Wikberg
Biffyshrew <biffy...@aol.com> skrev i inlägg
<19971002143...@ladder02.news.aol.com>...
> Johan Wikberg wrote:
>
> > > Was this Frank's reaction on the first
> > > bootlegs reaching the underground
> > > market? (I didn't think the first boots
> > > got released that early)
>
> > I don't think any Zappa/Mothers boots were released
> > that early either.
>
> The _200 Motels_ bootleg was already on the market by
> the summer of 1971, when _Fillmore East_ came out. It
> was the first release on the famous Trademark Of Quality
> piggy label.
Come to think of it, you're absolutely right! (And I myself wrote that in
the Bootleg FAQ almost a year ago - "my head?")
--- Johan <wik...@mbox301.swipnet.se>
Chris
kg...@grove.iup.edu (Jeff Gretz) writes:
>jas...@jsasoc.com (Jasper Leach) writes:
>>In article <34333eb7...@news.p3.net>, cal...@RALF.com wrote:=
>>
>>> winter 68, 69 -LA. Assemblage, collage.
>>
>>(if there's any) of the movie of UNCLE MEAT?
>
>measure it. You might also try moving the chicken around a little. becuase
>over here it's real commercial and if you move it over there it's underground.
>Kinda like the bun.
It would also help if he was familiar with The Arrangement.
-Chris
Jeff Gretz
In article <jasper-0210...@one0two147.metawire.com>, jas...@jsasoc.com (Jasper Leach) writes:
>In article <34333eb7...@news.p3.net>, cal...@RALF.com wrote:=
>
>>
>> winter 68, 69 -LA. Assemblage, collage.
>> After everybody moved out of the Log Cabin, I found a space over this
>> blood-testing lab next to a famous hot dog stand on Melrose avenue that
>> used to be a dentist's office (need I say more?)
>> Well yes actually, but at a later date.
>> (This is also the place of genesis of many other gems of albumcoverdom
>> including Captain Beefheart's- "Trout Mask Replica" & "Wild Man Fisher
>> Pretties for You With A Real Knife!!")
>> 95RR-inlay: 2 of the found Dentoid elements that were used in the cover
>> assemblage (turned into mush when they printed it with a scan instead of a
>> simple line shot.)
>
>(if there's any) of the movie of UNCLE MEAT?
i think you will find the plot of the movie if you simply use a chicken to
measure it. You might also try moving the chicken around a little. becuase
over here it's real commercial and if you move it over there it's underground.
Kinda like the bun.
jeff
DMB5561719
Peter ™berg <PETE...@vbtn.sr.se> wrote:
>cal...@RALF.com (Cal Schenkel) wrote:
>Fillmore East
>With only a couple of days to put something together, we decided on
>the bootleg look.
>
>I've always wondered about this one. Why did you and Frank decide to
>make it look like a bootleg?
Uh...because they didn't have TIME to develop
a real cover?
* . * . . D a v i d B e a r d s l e y .. dmb55...@aol.com *
* .. * ... .* .... *.. ..
* I M M P & B i i n k! m u s i c * . . *
.. .. * .. .. * .
J u x t a p o s i t i o n Ezine * * . .. .*
. .*.. . .. . . .*. . . . . .. * .
http://www.virtulink.com/immp/lookhere.htm * . . .
. .. .*.. * . . . .* ..*. . .. . *.
Ken Keen
On Tue, 07 Oct 1997 01:03:59 GMT, Paul Hinrichs <paul...@mindspring.com>
wrote:
>Someone posted a thorough and completely wonderful analysis of Uncle
>Meat here, maybe about a year ago. Does anyone still have that?
You mean this?
Subject: THE PLOT OF UNCLE MEAT
From: sea...@onramp.net (John Searcy)
Date: 1996/02/14
Message-Id: <4frjgf$l...@news.onramp.net>
Newsgroups: alt.fan.frank-zappa
As I'm sure most of you are aware, "Uncle Meat" is the name of the
"Mothers of Invention Movie" which Frank Zappa started in 1967 and
finally released in 1987. Although the "soundtrack" for the film has
been widely available since its release in 1969, the film itself, in
my personal experience at least, is notoriously hard to come by, sold
only through Barking Pumpkin Records for $60.00 or some similarly
ridiculous price. However, I recently got the chance to rent this
rarity of filmdom for $3.00 from a local music store and see for
myself what turned out to be a surprisingly entertaining film,
including many vintage antics of the original Mothers, a lot of funny
routines, and, belive it or not, an actual plot. However, even if you
manage to obtain this film, the plot is rather difficult to work out,
being scattered throughout the film in a rather confusing, haphazard
style. Thus, I have constructed the following plot synopsis of Uncle
Meat, for those of you who will never get to see the film, or who saw
it but, like me, didn't quite grasp the intricacies of the storyline
on the first viewing. As far as I know, there hasn't been any other
full plot synopsis of Uncle Meat made available on the internet, so I
hope this one will be acceptable to you.
(Incidentally, the only songs from the movie which appear on the
original 1969 soundtrack are the title theme (taken from "The Uncle
Meat Variations"), "Dog Breath", and "Mr. Green Genes".)
Send any corrections or suggestions to me, at "sea...@onramp.net".
After all, there could easily be some subtle plot point that even I
ended up missing.
THE PLOT OF UNCLE MEAT
rearranged so as to be vaguely chronological
transcribed by John Searcy (sea...@onramp.net)
[Opening titles shown to Uncle Meat main title theme (actually
beginning of "The Uncle Meat Variations").]
Frank Zappa is a musician with a band called the Mothers of Invention.
The Mothers have had many exploits over the years, such as a show at
the Gerrick theater involving smothering someone with food and filling
a giraffe with cream cheese (shown to "Mr. Green Genes"), a concert in
Germany, various shenanigans on the road (shown to "Mother People"),
and pretending to hump each other like dogs in a hotel room, an
activity they refer to as "packing" (shown to "Dog Breath").
Currently, Frank is working on making a movie, which he calls "Uncle
Meat", which of course is the very film I am describing. However,
during all these exploits, keyboardist Don Preston (AKA Dom DeWilde)
has had a tendency to turn into a monster, as documented by footage
shot in the Vienna woods.
In 1970, Phyllis Altenhaus, Frank Zappa's video editor, is editing a
video of a Mothers of Invention concert in London which took place in
1968 and which heavily features this monstrous tendency of Don's. In
the concert (whose audio portion is reproduced on the album "Ahead Of
Their Time"), Frank Zappa is directing an interaction between some of
the Mothers involving the break-up of the band. Don Preston dressed in
a top-hat and cape, is extolling the virtues of progress in music,
while Ian Underwood, Bunk Gardner, and Art Tripp are promoting music
with "discipline". After a heated argument, Bunk, Ian, and Art leave
the Mothers and join up with some members of the London Symphony
Orchestra to form a more disciplined, robotic band. Next, Jimmy Carl
Black leaves the Mothers because he feels that the type of music they
are playing will not get him women. He dresses up in a "mod" outfit
and Jimi Hendrix wig and runs off into the audence in search of
females. Finally, Roy Estrada quits as well, claiming he is holding
the Mothers back by being a Mexican. Dressed as a pope with "aluminum
tits", he auditions for a singing career in front of Ian Underwood,
but he fails and the rejected Mexican pope goes off in a corner to
sob. We then see Don Preston mixing and drinking a strange potion in a
fuming beaker, causing him to turn into a monster (a process involving
Don making a funny face and sticking his tongue into his cheek). The
monstrous Don then attacks Ian Underwood from behind during his piano
solo, and begins playing for himself. However, after a brief song and
dance number, Underwood steals the piano back from Preston and
concludes the concert.
Pyllis, who has been watching this whole concert on video, claims that
it makes her want to vomit when she sees Don turns into a monster, but
then secretly admits to Frank that it gets her "hot". She then runs
into the bathroom and enacts a fantasy in front of the mirror in which
she herself turns into a monster. However, at this moment, the monster
himself, Don Preston, still in top hat and cape, emerges from a stall
and embraces Phyllis, beginning what will surely be a long and
beautiful relationship.
The two lovers then spend some quality time around the editing studio,
discussing the psychological reasons why Phyllis gets so "hot" when
she sees Don turn into a monster, and she and Don and Frank spend some
time switching roles (Don playing the woman, Frank playing the woman,
Phyllis playing the monster, Phyllis playing Frank, etc.) Eventually,
Phyllis declares to Frank that it is not she who is in love with the
monster, but Sheba Fleischman, her fictional alter ego. Sheba, who
varies very little in character from Phyllis, is also a video-editor
and is in love with Don's fictional alter-ego, Biff DeBris. The rest
of the plot focuses on the story of these two, slightly fictional
characters, whose story is parallel, and often identical, to that of
Phyllis and Don, except that Sheba and Biff meet in a pool hall
instead of a bathroom.
Biff DeBris, the fictional alter-ego of Don Preston, is a musical
composer and the leader of the band, Cleanser, which is the fictional
alter-ego of the Mothers. Biff's band includes Motorhead Sherwood, Ray
Collins, Cal Schenkel, British pop star Aynsley Dunbar, and a
red-faced dancing girl, and like the Mothers, Biff's band tends to
break up a lot. One faction of the band, made up of Cal and Motorhead,
has developed some new instruments for itself. Motorhead (dressed in a
strange, winged, costume) displays his new and improved kind of
guitar, which consists of the sawn-off upper portion of the neck of an
ordinary electric guitar with rubber bands looped around it and a cord
hanging off which can be plugged into the performer's pants or into a
specially mounted socket (whose photo is later used as the cover for
the album "Burnt Weeny Sandwich"). Motorhead explains that he hopes to
get some of the big stars to use his new guitar sometime in the future
and demonstrates its many superior qualities. Meanwhile, Cal, wearing
part of a light fixture on his head, has developed a new way of
playing the drums, which consists of hitting a high-hat cymbal with a
hammer and a wrench.
One day, Biff is relaxing in a local pool hall with some of his band
members as well as the young American/Italian Minnesota Tishman
(played by Carl Zappa), who is continually lying a rubber chicken out
on the pool table and declaring "I'm using a chicken to measure it."
After a while, Biff lies down on the pool table himself and allows the
others to construct a tent of pool cues over his body as he fantasizes
about his real-life conunterpart, Don Preston, turning into a monster,
a concept which really gets him "hot" and makes him wish that he could
turn into a monster too. Eventually, Biff gets down off the table and
goes over to the bar where bartender Bill Yards (played by Ray
Collins) is serving drinks. Also at the bar is a woman named Sheba
Fleischman, the fictional alter-ego of Phyllis Altenhaus, who is
waiting to be served a hamburger. Biff and Sheba start smalltalking
and seem to hit it off well.
Later that day, Biff has successfully picked up Sheba and the two are
back at Biff's apartment. Biff says that he knows what gets Sheba hot:
hamburgers. Sheba admits it and claims to also know what gets Biff
hot: sticks on his body on a table, having witnessed his activity at
the pool hall. However, Biff says that this is not, in fact, what does
it. Instead, what really gets him "hot" is showers--but not "nude
showers"--only showers with a woman wearing special clothes which he
keeps in a fuming laundry hamper in his refrigerator. Biff removes the
clothes from the fridge (showing slight signs of turning into a
monster as he does so), and Sheba agrees to don the clothes and shower
with him. She is next seen awaiting Biff in the shower, wearing the
designated garments, and Biff soon joins her, completely naked and
holding a plate with an uncooked hamburger and some relish. The two
shower together for a while, Biff carressing Sheba's body with the raw
hamburger meat, during which time, Biff reveals to Sheba that he is
actually Uncle Meat, the title character of the movie.
After the shower, Biff (AKA Uncle Meat) sends Sheba out to the
Hollywood Ranch Market, a local grocery store, to buy some cleanser to
clean his bathroom in return for him making her so hot with the
hamburger meat. However, as Biff well knows, the Hollywood Ranch
Market is the location for his band, Cleanser's, recording session
that very night. Soon, Sheba arrives at the Hollywood Ranch Market and
proceeds to wander around aimlessly for hours on end in search of
cleanser, usually staying near the hamburger meat section.
Meanwhile, Biff, now dressed in the top hat and cape of his idol and
alter-ego, Don Preston, reveals that he has been working for a long
time on composing a hit single for his band. He explains that we are
entering into a new era focusing on the development of the inner self,
and that we must be able to compose using anything, "a sock...a
bird...a fuming beaker." In fact, Biff hopes to compose a single of
such magnitude that it actually alters the karma of the nation's youth
and thus creates social and ecological harmony forever. However,
Biff's last single entitled "The Bun", which was a hamburger bun, was
admittedly not very popular and couldn't even get radio airplay, but
he is currently working on an arrangement involving a sock, a tie, and
other household objects laid out carefully on a cloth napkin. He
points out the various parts of the piece (guitar, bass, vocals,
dancer) and shows how moving the sock a few inches to either side can
effet whether the piece is commercial or underground.
In the back of the band's secret room in The Hotel, Biff reveals his
new composition to the band, and the piece's title is soon chosen to
be "I'm Using The Chicken To Measure It," after Minnesota Tishman's
famous catch phrase. Biff explains that they must learn the piece by
tonight for their recording session at the Hollywood Ranch Market, but
the group complains that the piece is too difficult to learn in so
short a time and that much of their equipment (such as Motorhead's
famous guitar) is not in proper condition. As the band begins to
quarrel amongst itself over the feasibility of performing the song,
their intense arguing actually causes Biff to temporarily turn into a
monster, as he has always dreamed of doing.
Biff then goes to his wheel-chair-bound producer, The Countess, who
works for Moop records and is guarded by her hefty servant Rollo
(played by Billy Mundi) and asks her if his band could have some
royalties to help pay for the expenses of their recording session.
However, Biff cannot bring himself to say the word "royalties", so he
writes it down and shows the Countess. The Countess then utters the
dreaded word herself a couple of times, causing Biff to once again
turn into a monster each time she does so. However, the Countess
apparently refuses Biff, saying "Who cares about royalties?" and so
Biff is forced to do without them.
That night, the various members of Cleanser begin to assemble for
their recording session at the Hollywood Ranch Market, where Sheba is
still wandering around. First, Cal and Motorhead's nutty section of
the band is seen practicing near the front of the store, and then,
Aynsley Dunbar the British pop star shows up, titilating the check-out
girls with the vibrator he keeps on his belt. Aynsley, who is into the
sadomasochist scene, then approaches Cal and Motorhead and asks them
if they will beat him with a toilet brush, because he would like the
feeling and the musical sound it would make. However, Cal and
Motorhead apparently decide to stick to hammers and wrenches, because
Aynsley is later seen making the very same request of the
cleanser-seeking Sheba. Sheba agrees and begins whacking Aynsley
gently with the toilet brush as she chats with him. She asks him if it
is getting him hot, and he says that it would if there about fifteen
more people hitting him.
Eventually, Biff shows up with the rest of the band for the recording
session. He lays out the objects that comprise the music for "I'm
Using The Chicken To Measure It" on a counter in preparation for the
performance. By a happy stroke of luck, it so happens that performing
the single involves about fifteen people simaltaneously hitting
Aynsley Dunbar with toilet brushes. Thus, Biff has Aynsley lie face
down on the floor and gathers Sheba and the band members around him,
telling the various parts of the band what parts of Aynsley's body
they should hit. Once that is settled, the performance begins. All the
band members begin striking Aynsley's body with brushes as they chant
a haphazard refrain based on the phrase "I used to watch him eat, and
while he was eating, I would ask him what he was doing," a phrase
utilized by Sheba twelve years later in reference to Minnesota
Tishman. As the band plays their stunning rendition of "I'm Using The
Chicken To Measure It," on Aynsley's body, Biff begins turning into a
monster over and over again as the band members stalk him ominously
with toilet brushes.
The next day, Biff is in the editing room complaining to Sheba about
how sore his cheek is from turning into a monster so much during the
recording session. Sheba tries to help, but Biff instead decides to
use a chicken to measure his sore cheek, by shoving the rubber chicken
head deep into his mouth.
Twelve years later, in 1982, Sheba, now married to Biff, is in a new
editing room, editing videos of other scenes from the movie. She sees
Minnesota Tishman as she edits and says, "I used to watch him eat, and
while he was eating, I would ask him what he was doing, and all he
would say was 'I'm using the chicken to measure it.' To this day, I
still don't know what he was talking about," thus revealing the
meaning of the mysterious lyrics for "I'm Using The Chicken To Meaure
It."
Sheba then complains that after twelve years, Biff is still working on
creating a hit single ("I'm Using The Chicken To Measure It" having
been apparently unsuccessful) and that she is getting sick and tired
of it. A fatter, hairier, Biff (now played by Stumuk) is seen in the
next room working furiously on arranging a chicken, a sesame seed bun,
and other objects on the floor in hopes of creating a hit single, as
he flips through a book about his hero, Richard Nixon, for
inspiration, and watches an instructional how-to-speak-Italian video,
hosted by none other than his former companion, Minnesota Tishman (now
played by Massimo Bassoli), who has acquired an Italian accent with
his age. On screen, Minnesota is complaining about how Biff's single,
"The Bun", never became a big hit, despite its inherent greatness.
Sheba tells Biff that she is glad he is learning Italian, but that she
wishes he would stop with the bun nonsense. Meanwhile, on-screen,
Minnesota begins a part of the lesson which involves him giving a
rousing performance of the song "Tengo Na Minchia Tanta," which is
Italian for "I have a big bunch of dick." Finally, Sheba gives up on
Biff, and, despite the fact that he now has a new bun ("a better
bun...a brown bun!"), she decides to leave Biff and go back to New
York, abandoning Uncle Meat himself to a life of failure and solitude.
As the credits roll, the song "I'm Not Satisfied" plays appropriately.
THE END
----------------------------------
DON'T COUNT YOUR BLESSINGS YET.
http://rampages.onramp.net/~searcy
Dog Biz
It's pretty clear what the plot is from the beginning. Zappa
actually tells you what the plot is and how it progresses
thoughout the whole cheesey affair. Absurd or what?!
"Being alive is so weird"
FZ, Sometime in the 60's. NCP: David G.Walley
--
"Complete Garbage" Dog Biz, 01/08/97
"Truly fantastic materialist junk sculpture" Ben Watson 18/03/97
Dog Biz
Are you okay?
David Wilcher
In article <34333eb7...@news.p3.net>,
cal...@RALF.com (Cal Schenkel) poot forth:
>
>Here's some brief comments & notes on FZ album covers that I worked
>on--with--or for--(take your pick) Frank Zappa. (and a few other ones I
>didn't actually work on but know a little about.
>Part 2 sometime soon. (Remind me).
Isn't it time for phase 2?
--
David Wilcher
Tape List @ www.angelfire.com/oh/davesfztapelist/
wil...@ibm.net
The whole Universe is a large joke.
Everything in the Universe are just subdivisions of this joke.
So why take anything too serious? -FZ
Román García Albertos
David Wilcher escribió:
> In article <34333eb7...@news.p3.net>,
> cal...@RALF.com (Cal Schenkel) poot forth:
> >
> >Here's some brief comments & notes on FZ album covers that I worked
> >on--with--or for--(take your pick) Frank Zappa. (and a few other ones I
> >didn't actually work on but know a little about.
>
> >Part 2 sometime soon. (Remind me).
>
> Isn't it time for phase 2?
>
Uh-oh... I think I missed phase 1...
When was it posted? Was it posted here? Is available anywhere? Want somebody
to post it again?
ZappaLVR
===
10504 LUMPY GRAVY
10506/07 UNCLE MEAT
10508 HOT
>RATS
10509 BURNT WEENY
>SANDWICH
10511 CHUNGA'S REVENGE
10512 FILLMORE EAST
--Calvin
somebody asked for this
Chris Maxfield aka Zapp...@aol.com
"Music is the Best!"
Ulrich Mrosek
Román García Albertos wrote:
>
> David Wilcher escribió:
>
> > In article <34333eb7...@news.p3.net>,
> > cal...@RALF.com (Cal Schenkel) poot forth:
> > >
> > >Here's some brief comments & notes on FZ album covers that I worked
> > >on--with--or for--(take your pick) Frank Zappa. (and a few other ones I
> > >didn't actually work on but know a little about.
> >
> >
> >
>
> Uh-oh... I think I missed phase 1...
> When was it posted? Was it posted here? Is available anywhere? Want somebody
> to post it again?
Me, too! (Send answers to my mailbox, please!)
Uli