The end of two epochs - what a way to go! (sort of long)
Rune Jacobsen
fan. At least for now. I did however "live on borrowed time", with a two
week vacation to the US, July 1st - July 15th. This turned out to be some
of the most eventful two weeks of my Conan-watching life.
July 7th, I went with my mother and brother to attend the live taping of
the show. The first show after the hiatus, the first show with the new set
(we'd seen it on the NBC tour a few days before), this was going to be real
cool. I had attended one taping before (ConeCon III, August 15th 1997), but
I was real excited and hoped this show was going to be even better. As the
last time, it all started with some standup-insult-comedy from the guy
known as Mike (one of the people who keeps the masturbating bear under
control), then he introduced the band, they played, and then Conan came
out. Music playing, fans howling, him running into the audience to shake
hands. Sitting on the right end of the middle part of seats (or, left of
the right aisle), but sitting about 4-5 seats up from the bottom row, my
chances of getting to shake his hand were low. But suddenly...Whoa! He
fixed his eyes on me! Panic! Wha! Wha! I looked away briefely, scared, but
when I had to look back at him, he was still staring, coming towards me.
OhMyGod! It's happening! Fo'real! While I was busy trying to keep the heart
attack down, Conan asked me to get up and asked for my name. With 200
people staring and listening, I tried desperately to stay calm. I replied
"My name is Rune", pronouncing it in its proper norwegian form. Conan
grinned, and commented "No, no...I mean, what is REALLY your name? Mine is
C-O-N-A-N". The audience laughed. So did I, determined to at least try to
stay on top of it. "Rune, it is my real name". Replied Conan, "Wow, where
are you from?" - "Norway" - "Ah, so I guess in your language we'd be called
Kooooeeeenan and Eeeendiii?" - More laughter, me grinning. Conan then
invited me to hug him, which I did (great moments of my life, says I!), and
then had another guy in the audience get up, and he made us hug each other.
Then he said to the other guy, "You got up pretty fast, huh? Had your eye
on that guy!". More laughter. I was still alive. Then I actually had to
dance with him! I, a nerd, who haven't danced once in my life, with an
injured knee (soccer) and everything! Oh well, tried to do the same thing
he did, and for some reason it drew applause. Cool. Conan then proceeded to
introduce Andy to the crowd, and still shocked, I sat back down. They
talked a bit about Andy being of Swedish/German origin, and how they
together waltzed over Norway in WWII (all in good humor, of course), and
then Conan had me get back up for another dance, this time with the band
and everything. Following the rythm and the moves of Conan as closely as I
could, I hung in there until the music stopped, and Conan shook my hand a
couple of times, and told Andy that since I had been such a good sport, and
to tighten the bonds between our countries, they should get me a gift from
backstage. While Andy went of to search, Conan told me, grinning, that this
wasn't really that great a show, and that they didn't have much stuff. Andy
then came back to tell me that I would now be one of the few proud owners
of a real talk show hosts socks! He had the socks Conan had worn to work
that day behind his back, and after some protests from Conan, I got them to
keep as my own! After this, Conan thanked me again, still failing to
pronounce my name ("Roon-jaa" was the closest he ever got), shook my hand,
and went down to prepare for the show. I sat down, and my mother and
brother grinned manically at me, not believing they had actually seen me
"dance". My heart was pumping blood at a rate formerly unknown to me, and I
had to just sit there for a long bit while the band played, trying to
digest it. The socks now live in one air-tight bag each, waiting to be
framed and put on my trophy wall. I'll put some pictures of them up on a
web page if there is any demand for it.
The show turned out to be pretty cool, with the police boss guy from NYPD
Blue and Rich Hall's silly "Umlaut" joke that produced some beloved
tumbleweeds. You could actually see me on TV, too, in the sketch where
Max's wife is in the audience with her lover. When she stands up, I am the
guy with the black hair and green T-shirt. Also, the LaBamba line "Sorry
Max, I've been banging your wife for years!" has to be one of the coolest
I've heard. :)
Then, one week later, I'm all packed and ready to go home the next morning,
watching what is to be my final Conan show, at least for a very long time.
Alan Alda was pretty cool as a guest, and then the shock came. William
Preston had died, and they played a very moving, incredibly funny but also
terribly sad tribute to our favourite "Oldy". When the clip of him singing
"It's raining men" in a red dress came up with the male strippers dancing
around him came up, I was literally rolling on the floor, laughing and
partly crying. After the segment, I turned off the TV. Sorry to the last
guest, but I couldn't find a more appropriate way to end my Conan-watching
career. Although I had in my vacation seen such highlights as
"Inappropriate!", "The foaming celebreties channel" and Dr. Smith from the
old "Lost in Space" series insult Pimpbot, these two moments were, hands
down, the highlights. From the great joy of talking to, hugging, dancing
with and shaking the hand of Conan, to the sadness of having one of the
most beloved characters and actors pass away, it was a very emotional
goodbye to Late Night.
I hope they bring it back to Europe soon. There are lots of things I won't
miss about American TV. People singing passionately about genital herpes in
commercials is one of them. Conan is not.
Thanks, guys.
--
Rune Jacobsen
