1. I hate mismatched bookshelves, and they don't work if you are
selling new books. Used or remainder books, maybe.
2. Half is too little, that would leave you in the black. Assume you
will lose money. Forever.
3. True more than it isn't.
4. True less than it isn't.
5. True, except I would offer Jodi Picoult or Dan Brown, depending on
the vibe.
6. Yes, and why the hell you'd ever want a posse of unsupervised kids
with gum in your bookstore, I can't imagine.
7. Not true, the hoarders take it all, pretty quickly.
8. True.
9. Totally false, there's a HUGE proportion of self help book buyers
who will hang around and talk to you for hours, if you encourage it.
Which you do, because these people are cash cows and will be back in a
few weeks to buy the next self help book. They also tend to make you
feel better about yourself and are really understanding if you need to
excuse yourself to go do something sane.
10. True, except for the creepy guys who want to discuss them.
11. This happens anyway.
12. False, with a caveat. They don't write bad checks (usually) at
the store, but they'll write bad checks at events regularly, you are
guaranteed at least one at each event. Event buyers also give maxed
out credit card numbers because you can't check them.
13. Yep.
14. That stuff isn't books, it's junk.
15. True. Also true of schizophrenics, who were some of my best and
nicest customers. And retirees with an interest in military history.
Most of these guys are really nice, though, since all they need are
rules, and more or less appreciate kind directness.
16. True. Very difficult to explain. I was a meanie head and
referred them to a local rare book dealer who was a total asshole and
deserved to have to explain this over and over.
17. That's not kosher with new books, your supplier will hang you out
to dry if you do that, and they will find out, oh yes they will. But
it's standard practice in used and remainder stores, which is pretty
stupid and obnoxious.
18. That happens, though in the bookstore I worked the longest the
most common find was a gift certificate to the store, often many years
old. We always honoured them.
19. Dr. Suess is better, but still a cliche.
20. True.
21. True. This is made worse by your regular flashes of psychic power
when someone comes in and asks "do you have that book? it's blue...?"
and you give them what they wanted. A corollary is that customers
think you only read high literature, and they keep apologizing for
buying the latest whatever, which you adored and have been stuffing
into peoples' bags for the last two months.
22. True. Also angry if you don't match Costco prices.
23. Mystery readers are your best customers. They aren't weird, they
buy a lot of books, and they're quiet. Tend to be older, highly
educated, and monied, often have extremely interesting life stories,
like "I walked from New Dehli to the Everest base camp in 1957" sorts
of stories. And they bring in pictures.
24. While I think it's true, I don't think it's sad. They are just
things. People lend all too many emotions to books, instead of the
things that books represent.
25. True, although after a year or six months you are scarily up to
speed and become incredibly intimidating wrt current and past books.
Some of that's real, but most of it is learning to fake it in a most
spectacular manner. I could yak with superfans about the latest
whatever in the series and not get caught out, it's all a matter of
learning the dozen important things about the series or book or
character or author.
--
nj"internym here"m
Send reggae, guns & numbers.