Marc Hulett's Job Responsibilities as PA
sparky
Someone brought this subject up a while ago but it never got
answered...we got sidetracked. Anyhow, I was wondering what exactly
Marc (PA) does?
I would think that he has to be in content with whoever sets ups
Barry's schedule (or is he the one), tells him what attire is
necessary for the day (suit, jeans, etc.), carries all pertinent info
(passport, medication), etc.
Barry would need if away from home for a few days. Marc might also
need phone numbers for emergencies in each town (dr., etc.) Also, list
of songs for concerts, VIP people he will have to meet in each city,
etc.
Anyone else think of anything more?
Also, how many "staff" does Barry have daily? I'm referring to a
cook, house cleaner, gardeners, etc. I would think that he would not
want any live-in staff because he is a private guy...but he still
needs someone to take care of those invisible dogs when he is away
from home...
Any ohter comments?
Sparky
Scooter
> Someone brought this subject up a while ago but it never got
> answered...we got sidetracked. Anyhow, I was wondering what exactly
> Marc (PA) does?
<snip to>
> Any ohter comments?
No.
=========
Scooter
--
Remove the zebras to reply by email.
BMeskunas
>answered...we got sidetracked. Anyhow, I was wondering what exactly
>Marc (PA) does?
***
I'm sure someone here will give you a better answer, but I remember about a
year ago when the rumor was going around that Marc was no longer with Barry,
and Barry was allegedly advertising for a new PA.
The rumor, of course, turned out to be outrageously false, but I decided to
have a good time with it and reprinted the Help Wanted listing someone found on
the Internet along with my translation (T) of what that might have meant in
the Manilow world (only my interpretation, as I don't know Marc Hulett and
haven't the foggiest clue what on earth he does). So this might answer your
question ... or might not ... or might at least give you a chuckle. :-)
Brenda
****
A high profile public figure/artist who travels extensively is seeking a
personal assistant. Personal assistant will be required to accompany individual
while traveling, to be available as needed during travel as well as in various
different residences/states.
(T: Please note that the word TRAVEL is mentioned no fewer than three times in
the first three sentences. Your pets will no longer know you. Good luck
getting your mail, and wait until you try to do your taxes.)
This position requires 100% travel (domestic and international), a willingness
to be devoted to the job and the needs of the individual in question and the
flexibility to adapt to ever-changing circumstances at a moment's notice.
(T: Just in case you didn't get it the first time, Einstein, you're going to
have to travel. A lot. So much that it will make you puke. Along with having
no home, you will have no life of your own. You will be on call, 24 hours a
day, 7 days a week, forever and a day.)
Some of the typical duties include:
-- Travel with artist
(T: Remember that song "Me And My Shadow?")
-- Ability to accompany artist when needed at several different residences
(T: Did I mention I travel a lot? If strange beds make you nervous, this is
not the position for you.)
-- Check in and out of hotels, deal with hotel staff and room service requests
(T: Get used to such handy phrases as "The water pressure is too high!" "The
water pressure is too low!" "Can you send up ten more humidifiers, please" and
"SECURITY!" If strange people make you nervous, this is not the position for
you.)
-- Procure needed food and health supplies
(T: You will faint when you see how many prescriptions I'm taking. And if
it's not Evian, I ain't drinking it.)
-- Pack and unpack suitcases
(T: Because I forgot how 20 years ago)
-- Set up all dressing rooms, hotel rooms and houses to make environment
familiar to artist
(T: I think the dresser looks better over there -- no, wait, over by the
window ... no, wait, put it back where it was! Where was I? Oh, have you done
any contracting? How handy are you? Oh, and I like my pillows plumped at all
times. And you WILL do windows.)
-- Launder and iron artists clothes
(T: I used to have another employee who did this, but we're downsizing.)
-- Flexible schedule to be available at odd hours
(T: You will never get eight straight hours of sleep again as long as you
live.)
-- Have the ability to carry suitcases, boxes, other items
(T: ..while being chased by legions of fans. Must be able to hurdle chairs
while carrying 200 pounds worth of crap.)
-- Coordination of appointments with hair and makeup artists and stylists
(T: You have it easy. Think what this was like before cellphones.)
-- Accompany artist to scheduled appearances and venues as
arranged with artist management
(T: Which is often interesting, considering how much advance notice "artist
management" gives everybody)
-- Work with artist management to coordinate cars so that artist is safely
transported to destination
(T: You're also responsible for making sure I sit on the correct side of the
car so that I can wave to those wonderful people after the show.)
-- Provide services to support the comfort and safety of the artist
(T: Includes plumping my pillows (see above) and shooing away those annoying
people who follow me from city to city, wave to me after the show, and pay your
salary.)
-- Tip people for personal and business services such as valet, massage
therapists, etc…
(T: Don't you think it's interesting I mentioned "massage therapists" second?
I mean, even before before waiters and waitresses? Don't you think that's
weird? You do? Well, then, you're disqualified, Junior. Next?)
-- Appraise artist of travel details with direction by artist management
(T: I tend to throw things when I find out artist management just booked me
for the rodeo. I thought you should know.)
-- Provide any other type of support requested
(T: Don't ask unless you're prepared to be terrified.)
-- Run errands
(T: And I do mean RUN)
-- Purchase and distribute gifts
(T: My last assistant sucked at this. Here I've been buying my fans thank-you
gifts for 25 years, and he never sent them out! Can you believe that? No wonder
these people don't think I appreciate them!)
-- Keep log of artist phone numbers, fax numbers & addresses
(T: I never call people I don't know, so this isn't too tough. But I haven't
dropped anything in the mail in twenty-five years, so you'd better get started
on those Christmas cards now. How much is postage now anyway? Twenty-five
cents?)
-- Update schedule on a weekly basis
(T: More like daily schedule, but weekly sounded better)
-- Administrative support to include:
-- Computer skills such as Internet access, viewing graphic files, Word, Excel,
etc…
-- Faxing
-- Phone calls
-- Sending and receiving e-mails with or without attachments
-- Receiving and sending mail and packages
(T: I only use my computer for fun. You can use it for all that other icky
stuff)
The selected individual will possess the following attributes:
-- Confidential and discreet
(T: Remember, everything at Stiletto is top, top secret. Breathe a word to
anybody about anything and the molecular structure of the universe will
collapse and you'll be out of a job, son.)
-- Extremely professional and unflappable
(T: I am somewhat tempermental and moody, so be prepared for regular abuse.
You, on the other hand, must never become tempermental and moody. There is
simply no excuse for a human being who can't control himself.)
-- Service-oriented
(T: "How high would you like me to jump, sir?" is a very handy phrase.)
-- Tireless and energetic
(T: You can't miss your bed if I don't let you sleep.)
-- Efficient, with the ability to anticipate what is needed
(T: I can't be bothered to communicate properly, so you'd better be a
mind-reader. I'm thinking of a number between one and ten ... )
-- Ingenuity and creativity
(T: If I ask you 'How do we get out of this mess?' when the car breaks down in
the middle of Pennsylvania, you'd better have a good answer.)
-- Extremely detail-oriented
(T: As I can't be bothered with little details.)
-- Self-starter that does not crave approval or attention
(T: And I don't want to be bothered telling you what needs to be done, and I
don't want to be bothered having to praise you. In fact, I just don't want to
be bothered. Get it?)
-- Individual is in an appropriate time in his/her life when he/she can be
absolutely devoted to his/her work
(T: You must have no friends, no family, no hobbies, no life. That bothers
me. )
Minimum 5 years experience as a personal assistant to a high profile
celebrity/individual with a busy calendar and a heavy travel schedule is
required. A BS/BA degree is preferred but not required.
(T: Education is not important. Being a trustworthy and obedient servant is.
By the way, did I mention that TRAVEL is required?)
Please include details as to the nature of the duties performed and the salary
expectations.
(T: So I can see exactly how much I can make you do for me, and how cheaply I
can buy ... er, hire you.)
A full criminal and credit background check will be required of the selected
candidate, prior to a job offer.
(T: If you can't manage your own money, you sure as hell can't be trusted with
mine. But don't take any of these background checks personally -- heck, we spy
on everybody.)
ElaineOH
answered...we got sidetracked. Anyhow, I was wondering what exactly
Marc (PA) does?<<<
That was me. I brought it up. I'm still wondering.
(But Brenda's description of the PA job is most likely the most honest one
we will ever get !)
Scooter, you seem reluctant to pursue the matter. I'm almost afraid to
ask why.
Elaine
Scooter
> Scooter, you seem reluctant to pursue the matter. I'm almost afraid to
> ask why.
Don't. :)
sparky
Hi Brenda,
Thanks for making me smile! I am exhausted just from reading all the
requirements...now I really appreciate my work and life...becasue I
travel only when I want and it is for vacation!
Sparky
PS-I wonder which celebrity has the fastest turnover rate for PAs? I
gotta think about that and get back to you!
allbymyself
(T: And I don't want to be bothered telling you what needs to be done,
and I
don't want to be bothered having to praise you. In fact, I just don't
want
to
be bothered. Get it?)<<
LOL!!!
This is just one of the many that cracked me up.
You are really funny!
Thanks for a good laugh :)
Although I'm thinkng that about 90% of this isn't a joke?
marria nfny
ElaineOH
> Scooter, you seem reluctant to pursue the matter. I'm almost afraid to
> ask why.
Don't. :)<<<<<<
Are you NOT saying what I think you're NOT saying? SAY IT !! I can take
it. I think....
Elaine
allbymyself
it. I think.... <
Elaine
************************************************************
Theres a lot to be said for silence!
Of course maybe what we think she's not saying isn't what she's not
saying! lol
marria nfny
ElaineOH
Of course maybe what we think she's not saying isn't what she's not
saying! lol<<<<<
Or maybe we just have twisted minds. Time to hit the archives I guess.
Elaine
sparky
Hi Brenda,
Just had to tell you that I read your job description again several
times last night...so funny...and I bet a good portion is correct!
About running, I would run but in the opposite direction...jeez, this
is def NOT the kind of job for me! ROTFLMBO
Sparky
BMeskunas
>times last night...so funny...and I bet a good portion is correct!
>About running, I would run but in the opposite direction...jeez, this
>is def NOT the kind of job for me! ROTFLMBO
Sparky,
Marc is not my favorite person in the world, 'tis true, but I do have to give
him credit for taking on a job - for 20 years - that I wouldn't last a DAY in.
You might enjoy this:
THE TOP TEN CHALLENGES MARC FACES AS BARRY'S ASSISTANT
10. "Can I go backstage to meet Barry?"
9.. Having to memorize the names, hometowns, and personal histories of 3,000
female Manilow fans ...
8. .. who all want to be his girlfriend
7. "Can I go backstage to meet Barry? I'm going blind, my house burned down and
my dog ran away. Meeting Barry is the only thing I have left to live for."
6. Wonders what it would be like to hold a meaningful conversation with a
stranger that's longer than 30 seconds
5. Has been aching to say "Damn it, do it yourself!" for 20 years
4. "Can I go backstage? I'm going blind, my house burned down, my dog ran away,
and I lost my apartment because I couldn't keep up the rent because I blew it
all on concert tickets and now I'm living in a box in the alley behind the
venue. Meeting Barry is the only thing I have left to live for."
3. "Can you take 75 pounds worth of gifts backstage? And can you have Barry
autograph them all and bring them back? And can this all be done tonight?"
2. "Can I go backstage? I'm going blind, my house burned down, my dog ran away,
and I lost my apartment because I couldn't keep up the rent because I blew it
all on concert tickets and now I'm living in a box in the alley behind the
venue. I'm also a struggling songwriter who's been rejected all my life and I
even wrote Barry a song on the inside of this rotting cereal box and I just
know he'll want to record it. By the way, meeting Barry is the only thing I
have left to live for."
And number one, of course:
1. Putting up with the crying, the begging, the pleading, the whining ... and
then having to deal with the fans.
Brenda
ElaineOH
1. Putting up with the crying, the begging, the pleading, the whining ...
and
then having to deal with the fans.<<<<
You are just a hoot !
Elaine
sparky
Hi Brenda,
These are so funny but true! I bet Marc has dreams that include
women asking him if they can go backstage...make that nightmares!
Sparky
CookieGVB
;-)
Gail
ElaineOH
clue...
;-)<<<<<
I've not read it, but I will. In what way does this book relate to Marc?
Elaine
BMeskunas
>
> These are so funny but true! I bet Marc has dreams that include
>women asking him if they can go backstage...make that nightmares!
>
> Sparky
I always imagine my personal hell being one of two things ...
a) having to listen to "Memory" for all eternity, or
b) having to spend 24 hours inside Marc's brain.
I honestly don't know which one's scarier.
Brenda
BMeskunas
Naaahhhhhh ...
I don't get points when they're that easy.
Brenda
ElaineOH
Marc?
Naaahhhhhh ...
I don't get points when they're that easy. <<<<<<
Brenda, have mercy on me. Help me out here. I need more dots...
Elaine
ElaineOH
I've read the description of the book on Amazon. What sort of "small
clue"? Please help me out here. Somebody?
Elaine
Lea2049
and does it. If Barry want's a piece of clothing he see's in the paper,Marc
goes and gets it. Marc doesn't get any peace until after the show. Bless Marc!
Shanon Florence
most of the married men I've met expect their wives to do!
( NOT to imply that his job responsibilites include that of a sexual
nature. )
Guess Barry's just like any other man and wears the pants in the
family...
Wachit
<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<
Well I don't know exactly how I feel about that....being that I'm a married
woman. I definitely don't do all those things for my husband as he is
perfectly capable of doing them for himself.
As far as Marc's duties are concerned, he was well aware of what he needed to
do long before he took that job as are most personal assistants. If you want a
closer look just watch an episode of "The Osbournes". Ozzie's PA is with him
every minute of the day. Of course you can't understand one word he says:>)
Susan
BMeskunas
>started working for Barry and he didn't have a clue who I was. I stood behind
>
>him in line and as we were both walking out the door I softly said to
>him.."Tell Barry..wonderful show, last night." He just smiled and said "I'll
>do that."
>
I remember when Marc first started working for Barry. He was so fan-friendly
back then ... he always made time to stop and talk to the people who supported
Barry's career and, ultimately, paid his salary. But I imagine that anyone,
over time, would get jaded working under the pressures someone like Marc has to
face on a daily basis.
Brenda
Wachit
back then ... he always made time to stop and talk to the people who supported
Barry's career and, ultimately, paid his salary. But I imagine that anyone,
over time, would get jaded working under the pressures someone like Marc has to
face on a daily basis.
<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<
people". It doesn't change the person that he is (he's probably a really nice
guy), but it changes how he perceives the many people he has come in contact
with and it probably has changed their perception of him.
Susan
BMeskunas
>f------
>people". It doesn't change the person that he is (he's probably a really
>nice
>guy), but it changes how he perceives the many people he has come in contact
>with and it probably has changed their perception of him.
>
>Susan
>
Beautifully put - I couldn't agree more.
Brenda
Delynn
news:20040731105932...@mb-m01.aol.com...
> I remember when Marc first started working for Barry. He was so
fan-friendly
> back then ... he always made time to stop and talk to the people who
supported
> Barry's career and, ultimately, paid his salary. But I imagine that
anyone,
> over time, would get jaded working under the pressures someone like Marc
has to
> face on a daily basis.
>
> Brenda
I can promise you that you're right, Brenda. As hard as you try to fight
it, you do get very worn down and very tired. It isn't long before the
excitement fades and it truly becomes work and no longer fun. You find it
very hard to maintain a pleasant facade. Instead of listening to what a fan
is saying to you, you're thinking what is the best way to extricate yourself
as quickly as possible.
You learn who the needy, demanding fans are very quickly and when they start
coming your way, you start looking for the nearest door or hole in the
flloor to escape!
This is certainly NOT true of all fans, but you get that way with the needy,
demanding types.
Deb
Barbara Ann
For all who don't ask something of him, how many want everything and more?
"Delynn" <Del...@neb.rr.com> wrote in message
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