Just One Night Chapter 15
kimbi
one....hehehe
CHAPTER 15:
She recovered consciousness briefly in the ambulance. Alex was sitting beside
her, his
face white with shock and guilt, but it wasn’t his fault, it was hers. She
wanted to reach
out and tell him so but it hurt to much to talk. She saw him look at her and
saw the
anguish in his eyes.
Her hand touched her stomach and she shudderedsuddenly. What if she lost the
baby? She closed her eyes and prayed desperately, and then, like a child
making a
magic incantation against evil, she found herself promising that if only her
baby was
safe she would do whatever Alex wanted. She would even marry him.
The vow hung in her mind as she fell back into unconsciousness, but she had
made it
and she clung to it like a good luck charm, almost as hard as she clung to
Alex’s hand.
She was beginning to feel rather blase’ about opening her eyes and finding
herself in
strange beds. This one had scratchy sheets, and felt uncomfortably hard.
“Good, so you have decided to rejoin us at last have you?”
She looked up into the face of the white coated doctor bending over her.
“My baby....” She felt as though she were shouting, but in reality her
voice was a
whisper. Her whole body ached, especially her back.
“My baby...” she pleaded again.
“Babies are tough little characters, Yours seems to be quite content where he
is for the
moment. We’ll keep you under our eye for a couple of days though, just to be
on the
safe side.”
Kim closed her eyes and felt the hot tears come through her lids and down her
face, as
she sent up a prayer of thanks.
“Alex....” She flushed brilliantly as she realise what she had saying, but
the doctor
seemed not to notice.
“Ah, yes, that will be the gentleman pacing up and down impatiently outside.
You can
see him, but only for a few minutes.”
She was in a small ward, hers the only bed that was occupied. The doctor left.
Outside the sun had risen. The door opened and Alex walked in.
“Now you will really be late.”
She saw some of the strain leave his face when she spoke.
“Are you all right?” He came to her bedside, and stared down at her.
“Both of us are fine.” watching the relief dawn in his eyes.
She felt so guilty. If anything had happened to thier baby it would have been
her fault
for panicking so stupidly.
“God, when I think what could have happened!” His voice was a thick
tortured sound
that hurt her. She reached out and took his hand in hers.
“I feel the same way, but we were lucky, and nothing did happen.”
She looked directly into his eyes. “I’ve changed my mind, Alex. I’ll
marry you. I made
a vow on the way here that if the baby was alright I would.”
The delight that had been lightening his eyes faded abruptly, and she thought
she
must’ve mistaken it when he said slowly, “I don’t want to rush you into a
decision.” He
avoided looking at her as he walked to the window and stared out. “There are
worse
things a child can endure than an absent father. I was wrong to try and
pressure you,
you don’t have to marry me out of guilt, you know.”
What did that mean? Had he changed his mind? Was this his way of urging her
to
think it over? A wave of humiliation scorched her. She had been a fool. His
initial offer
of marriage had probably been nothing more than a impulse which he had
regretted the
moment he made it.
No doubt he had secretly been relieved when she turned him down.
Suddenly she felt tired and depressed. The door opened and the nurse came in.
“Time’s up for today, I’m afraid. Our patient needs some sleep.”
It hurt that Alex left without the slightest protest. He was almost eager to
leave.
What on earth was the matter with her? Her emotions were like a yoyo. One
moment
she wasd terrified of commitment, and the next in tears because Alex had
changed his
mind. Why couldn’t she decide what she wanted?
She wanted Alex. The knowledge whispered into her mind in much the same way
that
she had first realised she loved him. She wanted him to be a part of her life,
part of
their child’s life. She had been thrown into panic, as much by guilt as by
fear. She
hated seeing his expression when he found out about her sham of a marriage and
how
she had lied to him. Her panic had been as much a defensive gesture as
anything
else, but it was too late to explain all that to him now.In his eyes she must
appear to be
the most decietful person alive.
The nurse checking her pulse frowned, “You really must try and relax. It
isn’;t doing
either you or your baby any good to get upset like this. You’ve had a lucky
escape, the
pair of you.”
She slept through most of the morning. From her window she watched the
visitors
arriving, and was suddenly struck by her aloness. When she had the baby would
she
be the only mom with no family or friends around her?
Fresh tears welled in her eyes and she was dashing them away when the door
opened,
and Megan came in carrying flowers and fruit.
“You poor thing, Alex told me what happened. I was coming to see ma anyways
so I
thought I would pop in and check on you.”
“I’m alright, and Junior is being patient with me.”
“I do know how you feel. I stupidly let myself get high blood pressure with
our first and
was confined to a bed for the last few weeks. Worse than the waiting was the
guilt, the
feeling I somehow failed. It doesn’;t last though. The moment I held John,
I forgot I
wasd the most dreadful woman on earth, I was so proud of my self and him.”
Kim couldn’;t help but laugh. Megan was as invigorating as a bracing wind.
She made
her excuses and left. Kimberli had no idea what Alex had used as an excuse but
it was
clear she didn;’t know the truth.
The room seemed empty after she had gone. She felt restless and uncomfortable.
Her
bruised body ached but the conflict inside hurt the worst.
Alex had rejected her. She could hardly take it in.
They discharged her from the hospital the next day. A neighbor came to her to
make
sure she was ok. “You must’ve been terrified when you thought someone was
breaking
in. Alex said that it was the shock of him knocking on your door that made you
fall, but
luckily you’d forgotten to lock it and so he was still able to get in. You
are allright?”
Yes, she was, thank god.
They had told her to take it easy for a dsay or two at the hospital, but she
needed to
stock the books in the store, and if she went slow...
Tears blinded her for a moment as she went to collect her step ladder and she
brushed
them away with an impatient hand. What was the point of crying? Tears
wouldn;t bring
him back.
She was halfway across the greehouse when she began to be aware of a nagging
pain
in her back. She straightened up, rubbing the tender spot, and stretching.
Beneath her
the steps wobbled suddenly she was snatched off them, and swung against a warm
male chest.
“For christ’s sake woman, will you never learn! What the hell were you
trying to do? I
thought you wanted this child.”
Alex...Alex had come to her. She was too overjoyed to register the grim fury
in his
voice. Too deliriously happy to do anything other than close her eyes and
burrow
closer to the male warmth of him. Glorying in the sensation of his body
against her
own, his arms holding her close, his voice shivering in her ear.
“Kimbi...Look at me.”
Reluctantly she opened her eyes, wincing when she saw the fury in his. “Just
what
were you trying to do?”
Her small bubble of happiness burst.
“I wasn’t trying to do anything, I was just painting.”
“Oh, you were painting were you?”
She could feel the anger vibrating in his chest. “Forgive me, but, as I
understood it, the
doctors said to take it easy. Didn’t you hear them? Kimberli, are you tired
of carrying
my child? Are you?” he demanded.
Ashen faced, Kim pulled away from him. “No...” Dear god how could he
think that of
her! Her revulsion showed in her face, and instantly his own expression
changed.
“I’m sorry, Its just seeing you there....after that last time.”
They were standing apart now and as much as she longed to move back into his
arms,
Kim lacked the courage to make the first move. She ran her tongue over her dry
lips.
Why had he come to see her? Had he made up his mind? Was he...?
He was wearing faded jeans and a stained and faded tank top that showed each of
his
black inked tattos. He must have showered before coming out, because she could
still
smell the soap clinging to his skin. It made her want to nuzzle closer to him
and absorb
the scent of him.
Closing her eyes against the prickle of tears stinging them she swayed
slightly.
Instantly his hands bit into her arms. “Why...Why did you change your mind
about
marrying me Kimbi?”
The harshness in his voice cut into her. She opened her eyes and saw his were
dark
with anger mixed with more complicated emotions. She shivered. If she
hadn’t looked
at him she almost caught pain in his voice.
“What do you want to know for? You don’t want to marry me now anyways.”
“But you want to marry me, apparently. Why? You were so determined that you
didn’t
want me.”
“I’ve already told you why.” She couldn’t bear much more of this. If
he kept
questioning her, hurting her, she would stat telling him the truth....that she
loved him.
“Oh yes, so you have, but were you teling me the truth? You’ve told me so
many lies,
haven’t you? There were so many evasions....so much deciet. I was so wrong
about
you, wasn’t I? I thought you were guilty about making love to me....about
wanting
me....so soon after your husbands death. I bent over backwards making
allowences for
you, Kimberli, telling myself that you needed time, that I mustn’t rush you,
but all that
time you were playing a game....thats all it ever was to you, wasn’t it?
She could see the fury in his eyes, sense it building inside him, but she
simply bowed
her head, iknowing she had no defence.
“God, how you must’ve laughed at me behind my back! How amusing you
must’ve
found my “understanding” of your grief.” His mouth twisted bitterly.
“No!” The cry was torn from deep within her. “No...you dont;
understand, it wasn’t like
that!”
“Then just what the hell was it like?” he demanded savagely, reaching for
her, and
practically shaking her. “Because I sure as hell am driving myself insane
trying to
understand what it is that makes you tick, lady.”
“Oh God!” He released her abruptly with a grimace of distaste. “What the
hell are you
doing to me? You incite me tyo violence, do you know that? If I don;t leave
now, I
won;t be responsible for what I might do to you. When I think of how you
deliberately
let me think....let me sympathize....Oh God!”
The tortured curse was drawn from deep in his throat, leaving her own raw and
aching.
Kim knew there was nothing she could say.
She stood like a statue watching him go, unaware of the river of tears that
slid silently
down her face.
That was it then, no happy marriage, any happy ever afters where they would
share
their lives and their child. Thank God she hadn’t told him she loved him.
That would
have been the final humiliation.
She slowly walked back to the house, energy depleted, leaving her weak and
shakey.
Upstairs in her bedroom, she shivered even though she wasn’t cold. Only
Alex’s arms
could warm her and disperse this cold lump of misery inside her, only Alex
could bring
back the warmth and light back into her life.
CHAPTER 16:
“Swish! Three points!” screamed Nick as he beat AJ 21 to 6. “Bone you
have to
practice more, you are making this far too easy.” His laughter slowly faded
as he
looked at his buddy and realized something was really wrong. “Hey, Aj you
know you
can talk to me about anything don;t you?” Swallowing his heart back into his
chest he
began to let out what had been eating him away slowly.
She walked to the mailbox and found the divorce letter announcing the
finilization.
Walking back to the steps she layed her head on the cool stone column and felt
the
slow remorsefulness slide of tears down her cheeks. No matter how hard she
cried it
did nothing to erase the pain inside her. She heard someone walking along the
sidewalk, but didn;t move.
The footsteps stopped, a shadow blotting out the warmth of the sun. She moved
her
head and turned around, suddenly conscious of how alone she was , and how
vulnerable her position. Fear chilled down her spine, and she struggled to
stand.
Instantly a male hand came out to help her. The sun was dazzling her, she
shaded her
eyes, and felt as thought the earth were dropping away from her, as she saw
Alex
standing there.
“It alright Kim. Its alright now.”
Unbelieveably, he was holding her, cradeling her like a child, and she was
letting him,
lettting the guilt and grief pour out with her wretching sobs.
How long they stood like that she didn’t know. All she knew was that Alex
was with her,
holding her, stroking her hair and whispering soft words of comfort. She
raised her tear
wet face to him.
A grave smile touched his mouth, softening its hard outline. “A good friend
of mine and
my mom have said you love me and that it is written on your face, is it
true?”
He must’ve seen the shock and indecision in her eyes, because he took both
her hands
in his and held her firmly.
“No evasion......Trust me just this once, Kimbi, and tell me the truth.”
“Yes...Yes I do.”
With her admission she felt the weight of her guilt slide from her heart.
She swallowed hard and looked up at him, unable at first to bear to do so until
he
cupped her face with one hand and tilted it up to meet his eyes.
The look of love and passion blazing out of them burned through her. “I
never thought
I’d hear yo8u say that to me. I love you so much....right from that first
moment....right
from the very first time I touched you.”
“But the last time we met....you were angry....”
“We’ll talk about that later, right now I want you to know that I am sorry
for what I said
to you, but I was out of my mind with pain. I wanted to marry you because I
couldn;t
bear to live without you, and there you were saying you would marry me because
of a
vow of fear. Have you any idea howe that made me feel? I was so obviously
unimportant to you....I.... Marry me, Kim. Come live with me and....”
“Be your love? Gladly.....gladly my darling Bone.” She flung herself into
his arms, and
kissed him with all the pent up passiion of her feelings.
Beneath her mouth she felt the shock and then the response of his, and then he
was
the one kisiing her, his hands hot and urgent, his small cry of frustration as
he pushed
her away.
“I can’t make love to you here. In fact I suspect I’m not going to be
able to make love to
you anywhere until we are respectably married. I can get a special liscence.
How
about it chicka? Are you brave enought to do it in three days?”
“Three days! Will it really take that long?”
Kimbi
Jaforslev
Exhibit A: >She looked directly into his eyes. “I’ve changed my mind,
Alex. I’ll
>marry you.
*Note the compliance in the woman's voice.
Exhibit B:
>How long they stood like that she didn’t know. All she knew was that Alex
>was with her,
>holding her, stroking her hair and whispering soft words of comfort.
*Note that both parties are exactly where they should be.
Exhibit C:
>The look of love and passion blazing out of them burned through her. “I
>never thought
>I’d hear yo8u say that to me. I love you so much....right from that first
>moment....right
>from the very first time I touched you.”
*Note awesome feelings of love from BOTH parties.
Exhibit D:
>Alex had rejected her. She could hardly take it in.
*Oh....oops....ignore this part.
Julie
Jaforslev
>Kim couldn’;t help but laugh. Megan was as invigorating as a bracing wind.
HeeHee. Thought that said "breaking wind" at first! Sorry, chili for lunch
today.
Julie
the Free-abdal
u are so good at this kimbi! i should take notes!
i have a few storys of mines that i wish were like yours.. well kinda
cya
- the Free-abdal
aut inveniam viam aut faciam
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