How Can I Become Famous?
Tommy Joe
Imagine hunting down the most famous artist in America, cutting off
his head and framing it on your wall. Then you get thrown in jail and
become a celebrity of sorts. Could that be considered art - one dead
head framed on a wall? Well, you could always take a mallet to it and
turn it into abstract art. This is a metaphor for becoming an artist
just by hanging around with other artists.
Tommy Joe
Jeff Masterson
Tommy Joe
Jeff Masterson wrote:
> You''ll always be famous in my eyes Mr Joe.
Wait 'till I'm dead, then you can tell everyone you knew me just
like Hicks and Hedberg.
Tommy Joe (I knew the guy when he was still alive)
Vince
you posess no real talent otherwise.
Tommy Joe
Vince wrote:
> If you want to be famous...please kill yourself in an unusual way since you posess no real talent otherwise.
Hey fuckface, you're posting into a newsgroup. You're doing it
voluntarily. Why not try posting in an unusual way for once?
Everytime I see your name in a thread I literally cringe knowing I'm
going to see the same old predictable crap from you. I hope otherwise,
but it's always the same old thing. You are truly boring. I think you
already know that. Which means you are boring and sad.
Tommy Joe
OllieN...@aol.com
Tommy Joe
OllieN...@aol.com wrote:
> I am kinda jaded.
I'm kind of jaded too. I need more posts from you. And let's
lengthen them up while we're at it. Tell ya what, I'll shorten mine if
you lengthen yours.
Tommy Joe
Tommy Joe
OllieN...@aol.com wrote:
> I am kinda jaded. What would be a novel way to kill yourself?
Here's one based on the hose in the exhaust pipe routine, except
it's purely natural and you can do it in your own bed. Stick one end
of a rubber hose up your ass just a few inches, the other end into your
mouth. This is a truly exquisite way to die. I've researched it.
There is just enough air in your intestines to keep you alive for an
hour, maybe more - although breathing through the hose will take some
effort.
As you suck the air from your intestines you are being slowly
poisoned by noxious inner gasses commonly known as farts. Every so
often a really good one will roar through the hose - and you'll know it
- and you'll love it. You won't be able to smell it, or hear it as you
would sitting around with friends - but you will truly be as one with
your inner-self for the first time in your life - and as the farts
permeate your lungs and enter your brain they will become the substance
of your dreams - beautiful clouds of dreams that smell like all the
farts in the world coming through one small pipe - a pipe-dream so to
speak - and you will ride those fluffy fart-clouds into the realm of
death where even finer smells await.
Tommy Joe (EOS - eternity of smell)
Jeff Masterson
on this NG anyway. Not the original, original Ollie North, like the
colonel, but the... you fuckin know, anyway, this person is an imitator
of the legendary Ollie from this NG. No the real Ollie is somewhere in
a basement or 'dungeon' if you will, being trained by radical feminists
for policing the streets when Hilliary is re-elected.
Tommy Joe
Jeff Masterson wrote:
It's the real Ollie. He's simply moving beyond the childishness of
comedy, and the ugliness of professional comedy. But he has most
certainly retained his sense of humor, his new and improved sense of
humor, I might add. I like the way he didn't merely ask for novel ways
for one to kill oneself. He prefaced it by saying he was jaded. He
didn't come in begging for responses. He made a statement about
himself, then followed it up with a question. It inspired me. I need
more people to do this. As long as the questions are worthy, I will
answer.
Tommy Joe