Penn Bowl Challenge Trash Packet
Joseph K Wright
Penn Bowl was great again this year, but as I really don't want to discuss
the body of the tournament itself (12-36 as a university, plus finding out
about Akron (no offense meant to any Akronites)), I thought I'd share a
few reminiscences of the MO-MC challenge.
First of all, upon seeing Tom Waters to the first time ever, I remarked
to Dwight that he looked much more like Vince McMahon than I expected him
to. (Picture a powsder blue tux, I think you'll see it too) 8-).
Second, I was glad that all the sci-fiers were not around for the trash
packet, because it was totally devoid of sci fi because, well that's the
way Dwight and I wanted it, and the only comic book question was really a
TV question about The Tick.
Third, I was awestruck at the reactions of the audience to the trash
questions, an audience that was at times bursting with anticipation at
an answer. The crowd even yelled out answers to many of the unsuccessfully
answered questions, and I will absolutely never forget hearing a room
filled with people chanting in unison, "A la, peanut butter sandwiches."
I should also put in a note of explanation regarding the Louisville bonus.
Anyone who has watched ESPN's NFL Primetime has seen the schtick where
Berman or Roberts will be describing a player from Mr. Jackson's alma mater
and then will at some point say "From:" And Tom Jackson will shout
"Louisville!" The "Louisville"s in quotes and parantheses were shouted by
the scorekeeper (who happened to be me) while the moderator read the rest
of the question. All others questions should be self-explanatory.
Oh, and for TU #10, Dwight and I were looking for 5 major landmarks:
circle at the top, line coming down, arrow at bottom, big flashy spiraly
line, and little crosds type line just below the flashy line. To our
chagrin, this was not answered correctly.
Finally, as various people asked for the remaining bonuses to be read, I
have included all of them here. Enjoy.
P.S.: I'd say congratulations, Mike, but you missed the wrestling part of
the Louisville bonus, so I feel your victory was tainted. 8-).
TRASH PACKET
1.
In 1984, Paul Michael Larson, an ice-cream vendor from Ohio, made 45
spins around the board, and earned $110,237. He did this on a game show by
memorizing the pattern of the board, and by determining which spots would
be up when he stopped the board. FTP, name this show which brought the
phrase "Big Bucks, No Whammies!" into popular culture.
A: PRESS YOUR LUCK
2.
Where can you find pleasure, search the world for treasure, learn science
technology? Where can you begin to make your dreams all come true on the
land or on the sea? Where can you learn to fly, play in sports or skin dive,
study oceanography, sign up for the big band or sit in the grandstand when
your team and others meet? FTP, where can you do all these things, according
to The Village People?
A: IN THE NAVY
3.
Originally, this movie was to be called "Evil Dead 3: Medieval Dead." To
get a larger audience for this film's special effects, based on Ray
Harryhausen's works, the name was changed. FTP, name this Bruce
Campbell/Sam Raimi work, famous for such quotes as "This is my BOOM stick!"
and "Buy smart! Buy S-Mart!"
A: ARMY OF DARKNESS
4.
She was born in the town of Dildo, Newfoundland, which may or may not have
affected her career. She has starred in such flops as "Hot Dog: The Movie"
and "Cannibal Women in the Avocado Jungle of Death" and many other R-rated
low-budget "gems". FTP, name this 1982 Playmate of the Year, nicknamed
"Boss" who once boxed with Andy Kaufman.
A: Shannon TWEED
5.
Created by Ben Edlund, this cartoon character has faced such villians as
Brainchild, Dinosaur Bob, The Mad Bomber Who Bombs at Midnight, and El Seed.
His crime-fighting pals include the Civic Minded 5, the patriotic housekeeper
American Maid, and sidekick Arthur. FTP identify this superhero whose powers
as of yet do not include the ability to spread Lyme disease.
A: THE TICK
6.
"He was a good minor league umpire. When he got to the major leagues, he lost
his desire. He became a clown." This was said by Earl Weaver regarding a
man who recently commited suicide. FTP, name this man who umpired a World
Series and who wrote 4 books, including "The Umpire Strikes Back" and "The
Fall of the Roman Umpire."
A: Ron LUCIANO
7.
Two of them are brother and sister. One is a masseuse. One is the ex-
husband of a lesbian who is carrying his child. One of them is the son of
a best-selling trash romance author. One of them works at Central Perk, where
they all hang out. And one of them is Courtney Cox. FTP, what are all these
people who are sandwiched between Mad About You and Seinfeld on NBC
Thursday nights?
A: FRIENDS
8.
The 1979 Dennis Potter BBC mini-series starring Bob Hoskins was
critically acclaimed; the 1981 film adaptation starring Steve Martin
flopped, both in reviews and at the box-office. FTP, name this musical in
which all the songs were lip-synched, Depression-era recordings, and whose
title completes the musical statement, "Every time it rains, it rains..."
A: PENNIES FROM HEAVEN
9.
The late Bob Marley is recognized as one of the greatest reggae
singers in the world. But in the mid-1960s, he got his start with one
of the greatest ska bands ever. FTP, name the Jamaican ska band Marley
originally sang with.
A: The SKATALITES (Skat-tal-ites)
10.
Pencil and paper ready, this is sort of a spelling question. You must show
your answer immediately upon buzzing in. His name was Prince. FAQTP, Draw
what it is now.
11.
It started in Flagstaff, Arizona. It moved to Lincoln, Nebraska,
Tallequah, Oklahoma, Lebanon, Pennsylvania, Oneonta, New York, and finally
to Sioux City, Iowa. FTP, where does David Letterman get his top ten list
from?
A: THE HOME OFFICE (Prompt on: TOP TEN LIST)
12.
In his years as a player in the World Football League and the NFL, he never
won a championship. He did win one in 1994, however, in his first season as
coach of the Arena Football League's Arizona Rattlers. FTP, name this
footballer, best known as the unsuccessful successor to Roger Staubach as
Dallas Cowboy quarterback.
A: Danny WHITE
13.
Oderus Urungus is the vocalist. Sleazy P. Martini manages the band. They
are opposed by the Morality Squad. They are known for their outrageous
costumes, often extending over two feet from their heads, and their extreme
volume. FTP, name this band which Beavis and Butthead try to see in
concert in their video game.
A: GWAR
14.
This year it introduced the Aquazone line. Last year it released the
Belville line, specifically designed for the young girls market. The
previous year the Paradisa line was launched, releasing the first blocks in
pastel colors. FTP, Name this Danish toy company.
A: LEGO
15.
Identify the following Denis Leary song and tell me what I am."I'm just a
regular Joe, with a regular job/ I'm your average white suburbanite slob/I
like football, porno, and books about war/ I gotta average house with a
nice hardwood floor." FTP, I'm the world's biggest what, according to Leary?
A: ASSHOLE
16.
Simon Bond is known for his cartoons. His third book, Dead Lawyers and
Other Good Ideas, didn't sell well. His second book, Odd Dogs, sold a
little better, mainly because it seemed to balance his first book. FTP,
What was Simon Bond's first book, showing an array of functionalites for an
ex-feline?
A: ONE HUNDRED AND ONE USES FOR A DEAD CAT
18.
She is the former director of the John Robert Powers Finishing School for
Modeling and a member of the environmental committee of the Beverly Hills
School District. You probably know her better, however, as the best friend,
roommate, and possible lesbian lover of America's most celebrated murder
victim. FTP, identify this author of The Private Diaries of A Life Cut Short.
A: Faye RESNICK
19.
He has a cat, a white Persian. He is bald, and a scar is all that is left
of his right eye. He was played by Donald Pleasance in You Only Live
Twice, and by Telly Savalas, in On Her Majesty's Secret Service. FTP, name
this James Bond Villain.
A: Ernst Stavros BLOFELD
20.
He hopes that it'll be MAGIC. That's why he's planning to open a theme
park dedicated to trancendental meditation. It's also why he's founded a
Canadian political party that will abolish Parliament in favor of a group
of meditators. FTP, name this one-time TV magician, known for his long
hair, and for being NBC's answer to David Copperfield.
A: Doug HENNING
22.
If your front porch collapses and more than three dogs die. If you see a
family funeral as a place to meet chicks. If your idea of foreplay is, 'You
up?' If your idea of a cultural experience is a tractor pull. FTP, what 5-
word phrase prefaces all of these statements, a set of which was compiled
by comedian Jeff Foxworthy.
A: YOU MIGHT BE A REDNECK
23.
Name's the same. A 1988 film starring Mel Gibson, Kurt Russell, and
Michelle Pfieffer. An Eagles song which contains the lines "Take another
shot of courage, wonder why the right words never come, you just get
numb." And a cocktail containing orange juice and an a spirit contained in
its title. FTP, give the two words in common.
A: TEQUILA SUNRISE
24. He starred with Kentucky and Denver in the ABA, and wound up returning
to Denver, coaching them to an upset win in the playoffs over the Seattle
Supersonics in 1994. However, he recently stepped down citing an abundance
of pressure and too much time away from his family. FTP, name this former
Nuggets coach.
A: Dan ISSEL
25.
Last December, CBS ran a retrospective of this show. This was unusual, as
it was the only one of the three major networks not to air the program. It
started on NBC in 1978, and ended on ABC in 1983. FTP, name this show set
at the Sunshine Cab Company, which launched the career of Danny Devito.
A: TAXI
26.
According to John Stamos of Full House, a real Elvis fan can tell the King's
recordings from this man's. He was on his way to a taping of the Perry Como
Show to receive his first gold record when he crashed, killing his brother,
an incident which all but ended his musical career. FTP, name this Sun label
artist whose gold record was for "Blue Suede Shoes."
A: Carl PERKINS
(last TU actually read)
27.
Sabrina Duncan, Jill Munroe, Kelly Garrett, Kris Munroe, Tiffany Welles,
Julie Rogers. Once upon a time, they went to the police academy, and were
all assigned to "Hazardous Duty." But this show took them away from all
that. FTP. name this 70's show that starred John Forsythe as the title
voice.
A: CHARLIE'S ANGELS
28.
She is lobbying for the job of writing the screenplays if the next two of her
books to be made into movies. She failed in her attempt to write the first
such screenplay, but the real brouhaha came when she vehemently objected to
the male lead in that film. FTP, name this author of the book, but not the
screenplay, Interview With A Vampire.
A: Anne RICE
BONI (all worth 30 points possible)
Songwriting, like everything else, was much simpler in the '50s. If you
needed a lyric, instead of using real, sensible words, you just had to
string together some nonsensical syllables. Given a string of syllables,
name the oldie, FTP each.
1. Bom ba ba bom ba bom ba bom bom ba ba bom ba ba bom a dang a dang dang
a ding a dong ding
A: BLUE MOON
2. Sha na na na sha na na na na na dip dip dip dip dip dip dip dip oom oom
oom oom oom oom
A: GET A JOB
3. Sho doten shooby doo sho doten shooby doo sho doten shooby doo sho doten
shooby doo
A: IN THE STILL OF THE NIGHT
This was a record-setting season throughout the NFL, but perhaps you missed
this one. A Washington Redskin broke a 13-year-old record for total yardage
on kickoff and punt returns in a season.
1. First, FTP each, give the full names of the new and former record holders,
the latter a former Cardinal. Here's a hint, last name's the same.
A: BRIAN and STUMP MITCHELL
2. Now, FTP more, name the man who, in 1985, set a mark, called by NFL Films
one of the greatest forgotten accomplishments ever, for total all-purpose
yards in a season with over 2,500. He was nicknamed "Little Train."
A: Lionel JAMES
C is for Cookie. No, it's not a Sue Grafton novel, we're talking about
Sesame Street. Answer these questions about what was every 4-year-old's
favorite PBS show back when we were kids before dinosaurs were purple.
1. FTP, name the garbageman who carried around Oscar the Grouch sometimes.
A: SULLY
2. FTP, give the magic words used by the Amazing Mumford.
A: "A LA PEANUT BUTTER SANDWICHES"
3. Sesame Street was not above making fun of other PBS programming. FTP more,
identify the show hosted by Alistair Cookie which featured titles like
"Me Claudius" and "Chariots of Fur."
A: MONSTERPIECE THEATER
Now, kids what's a trash packet without a question on the old World Hockey
Association? Boring, right? Good, then. Given a city, tell me the name of
the WHA franchise based there, five points each.
Vancouver A: BLAZERS
Cleveland A: CRUSADERS
Quebec A: NORDIQUES
Houston A: AEROS
Phoenix A: ROADRUNNERS
Winnipeg A: JETS
We've all gone into the book store looking for fine literature and ended up
spending 2 hours in the humor section. Let's hope you were paying attention
to authors, though, and not just reading Calvin and Hobbes. Given a humor
book, name the author, 5 pts. each.
1. Cheap Advice A: Calvert DEFORREST
2. All The Trouble In The World A: P.J. _O'ROURKE_
3. I Took A Lickin' and Kept on Tickin' A: Lewis GRIZZARD
4. Deadline Poet A: Calvin TRILLIAN
5. Get Your Tongue Out Of My Mouth, I'm Kissing You Goodbye A: Cynthia HEIMEL
6. Buy This Book and Make Me Rich A: Rush N. _LIMBURGER_ III
Have you seen Pulp Fiction? Maybe you can help us. We know the movie is
divided into three parts. Each of them is given a title. If you can name
the titles of the three sections, you'll earn ten points each.
A: VINCENT VEGA and MRS. MARCELLUS WALLACE
THE GOLD WATCH
THE BONNIE PROBLEM
One of the most famous stand-up comedy bits ever is George Carlin's "Seven
Little Words," which recounts the 7 words you can't say on TV. Additionally,
Carlin includes 3 other taboo words. You'll earn 15 points, all or nothing,
for the first 7, and 5 points each for the last 3.
A: 7: SHIT, PISS, CUNT, FUCK, COCKSUCKER, MOTHERFUCKER, TITS
3: FART, TERD, TWAT
You've been annoyed by them, you've gotten email from them. It's time for
the College Bowl Netloon Quiz. Identify the Usenet Loony by the style of
looniness. Ten points each.
1. The Idiot Nazi Apologist, this Netloon had to be confined to
Alt.revisionism, after he crossposted Anti-Semitic comments to
rec.cooking.jewish, and to alt.usenet.net-abuse.
A: Dan GANNON
2. Not to be confused with the Supreme Court Justice, if you sent mail to the
sysadmin of this armegeddonist, you recieved several pages on the First
Amendment, as you see, he was the sysadmin.
A: Clarence THOMAS
3. The crazed Armenian. He frequently ranted on soc.turkish, on how the
Turks actually slaughtered the Armenians.
A: Serdar ARGIC
Well, since there's no trash science, unless you count engineering, we have
to trash science. Given an album with 'Science' in its title, tell me the
artist who recorded it, for the stated number of points.
15. Big Science A: Laurie ANDERSON
5. Weird Science A: OINGO BOINGO
10. She Blinded Me with Science A: Thomas DOLBY
[30-20-10] Give the common team name
30. On HBO's First and Ten, This was the name of the football franchise
20. In the USFL, this was Jacksonville, Florida's franchise name.
10. It's currently still the favorite basketball team of the Superfans.
A: BULLS (California, Jacksonville, and Chicago respectively.)
[30-20-10]
30-20-10. Name the TV Show by the quotes.
30. "What do you want for Christmas?" "I want to decide who lives and who
dies."
20. "Bad Movie? You're soaking in it."
10. "So what do you think, sirs?"
A: Mystery Science Theater 3000
She's the Grammy-nominated singer of If That's Your Boyfriend, He Wasn't
Last Night, but still no one can spell her name. F15P for the first name
and another 15 for the last, spell Me'Shell NdegeOcello, including all 4
capital letters, the apostrophe, and the accent mark.
A: M-e-'-S-h-e-l-l N-d-e-g-e-(accent mark)-O-c-e-l-l-o
Given the actor, tell me the villain played by him during the run of the TV
series Batman. Note that this is the 60's Adam West Batman.
[5]Burgess Meredith A: The PENGUIN
[5]Cesar Romero A: The JOKER
[10]Vincent Price A: EGGHEAD
[10]Milton Berle A: LOUIE THE LILAC
The best show on ESPN is NFL Primetime featuring Chris Berman, Robin Roberts
and Tom Jackson from (interject: "Louisville"). In honor of Mr. Jackson,
FTP each, identify these sports figures from ("Louisville")
1. This man recently left the university to take a head coaching position
at the University of Oklahoma.
A: Howard SCHNELLENBERGER
2. This quarterback who once led the Cardinals to a 10-1-1 season and was
thought to be the New York Jet's savior now languishes on the bench
A: Browning NAGLE
3. This former Nagle backup quit football to pursue a career in professional
wrestling with the WCW, but was mercilessly booed due to his father's
nepotistic policies.
A: Erik WATTS
(last bonus actually read)
Comedic composer Tom Lehrer is known for his work on That
Was The Week That Was, during the early seventies, but he's more familiar
to most folks our age for his contributions to the Electric Company. Given
the lyrics to a Tom Lehrer/ Electric Company work, give me the title for
15 points each.
1. "He can turn a can, alakazam, into a cane, but my friend Sam,
stayed just the same."
A: SILENT E
2. "In the public library, you fall and hurt your knee, but the
sign says QUIET! so how are you going to cry?"
A: L-Y
And now an emphatic thumbs down. Each year Siskel and Ebert choose the
worst film of the year. Given a description of a worst film of the year,
name the film for the stated number of points.
5 Points. Lea Thompson can't down from a goose, so she gets down with this
title animal. 1986.
A: HOWARD THE DUCK [Father forgive me, for I have punned.]
10 Points. Roger Ebert said it best about this 1994 star filled Rob Reiner
flop, "I hated this movie, HATED HATED HATED it."
A: NORTH
15 points. This 1992 sequel totally ignored the original movie and made the
main characters aliens from the planet Zeist. During the movie Virginia
Madsen said to Sean Connery, "I just don't understand this," one audience
replied "Right with ya there."
A: HIGHLANDER 2: The Quickening
Orenthal James Simpson isn't the only famous person to sport the initials
OJ. FTP each, identify these other famous OJ's.
1. This Penn St. grad is a wide receiver with the Miami Dolphins
A: O.J. MCDUFFIE
2. This longtime Cardinal running back achieved his greatest fame late in
his career with the Giants, carrying them to a Super Bowl 25 victory.
A: O.J. ANDERSON
3. While not strictly an OJ, his initials were OJJ. FTP identify this '80s
one-hit wonder whose Walkin' In The Rain makes Biz Markie's Just A Friend
sound like Beethoven's Fifth.
A: "ORAN" JUICE JONES
After an OJ question, equal time demands we write a Brown question, so
how's about an Encyclopedia Brown question? Answer these questions about
Sherlock Holmes in Tennis Shoes for ten points each.
Name the town where Encyclopedia Brown does his work. A: IDAVILLE
Name the leader of the Tigers, the gang that is usually responsible for
most of the crimes. A: BUGS MEANY
Give the name of the author of the Encyclopedia Brown series of books
A: Donald J. SOBOL
While we all know that the ultimate game experience is on a real computer,
cartridge-based machines have been the major market, no doubt due to their
catchy taglines. Identify the _company_ from the tag line. 10 points each.
Play it loud. A: Super NINTENDO
Welcome to the next level. A: SEGA
Do the math. A: ATARI Jaguar
This year one NFL coach achieved a distinction only two others have
achieved. Marv Levy managed to finally win one game against every other
team in the league. You'll earn 15 points for the other two coaches, who
have achieved this distinction. One who did it mostly with the Rams and
Seahawks, the other who did it primarily with the Oilers and Saints.
A: BUM PHILLIPS, Chuck KNOX
The name's the same, well half of it is anyway. The "real" names of all
these people or characters all contain the name Gordon. FTP each, given a
character or person's alias, give their real name.
1. Sting (the singer) A: GORDON SUMNER
2. ALF A: GORDON SHUMWAY
3. Batgirl A: BARBARA GORDON
Identify the following Winners in the NCAA's given the award they won.
Five Points Each.
Heisman Trophy Winner A: RASHAAN SALAAM
Winner of the Maxwell Award for most impact. A: KERRY COLLINS
Champion of Division III Football. A: ALBION COLLEGE
MVP of the Hula Bowl, this Colorado QB improved his draft stock immensely.
A: Kordell STEWART
Fred Biletnikoff award for best wide receiver. A: BOBBY ENGRAM
NCAA Coach of the Year. A: RICH BROOKS
If you listen to oldies radio long enough, you just might shoot yourself in
the head after hearing too much tragedy rock, i.e. songs where boy meets
girl, boy and girl fall in love, boy or girl dies a sudden painful death,
and survivor sings about it. FTP each, 5 if you need the artist, give the
title of the song from a description of the sudde painful death.
1.a. Car stalls on railroad tracks. Both escape, but girl runs back to get
boy's class ring. Car and girl are demolished by train.
b. Mark Dinning
A: TEEN ANGEL
2.a. Boy runs car off road and crashes into tree. Boy lives, girl dies.
b. J Frank Wilson and the Cavaliers
A: LAST KISS
3. After being dumped, boy rides off on motorcycle in the rain and crashes
into, well the song never says, but something. He is, however, certainly dead
b. The Shangri-Las
A: LEADER OF THE PACK
Well, Weird Al strikes again. His song, "Headline News," takes aim at four
targets. Answer these questions about the targets of the parody, for the
stated number of points.
First for FPE, name the song being parodied, and the band who performs the
song, known for the lead singer's distinctive baritone.
A: CRASH TEST DUMMIES, "MMM MMM MMM MMM"
Next for 20 points, all or nil, name the three trash news events parodied in
"Headline News."
[Accept Equivalents for all:]
A: Michael Fay, the Singapore Caning guy
Tonya Harding and the skating thing
The Bobbitts
END
--
Joe Wright, Cunning Linguist; Captain, Trashiest CB Team in the World
Give me ambiguity or give me something else! Make war not love, it's safer.
"The most dangerous criminal may be the man gifted with reason, but with
no morals." -Rev. Dr. M.L.King, Jr.
DFRYE
"Seven Little Words," which recounts the 7 words you can't say on TV.
Additionally, Carlin includes 3 other taboo words. You'll earn 15 points,
all or nothing, for the first 7, and 5 points each for the last 3.
A: 7: SHIT, PISS, CUNT, FUCK, COCKSUCKER, MOTHERFUCKER, TITS
3: FART, TERD, TWAT"
Oh how the times have changed. I have actually and personnally heard 4 of
these words on television. F5PE name them. For an additional 10 points,
guess which one of the 10 I've never said.
Wishing I could have played on this round. Maybe I'll have to piss off
Colvin sometime.
Darrell!
Tom Waters
jkw...@pitt.edu writes:
>First of all, upon seeing Tom Waters to the first time ever, I remarked
>to Dwight that he looked much more like Vince McMahon than I expected him
>to. (Picture a powsder blue tux, I think you'll see it too) 8-).
Joe,
I tuned into WWF last night just to check this one out. I'll admit to
some vague physical resemblance, though I cannot contort my face into the
goofy expressions that Mr. McMahon manages to achieve. I also do not own
a tux, powder blue or otherwise. If I play NTN this week though, look
for VinceM from Savannah, GA. : )
I was always told that I look like Glen Campbell. But, I've chosen
Robert Urich to play me when they do the movie on my life story.
Tom
Jeffrey Mason Jones
In article <3glkun$6...@solar.Armstrong.EDU>, Tom Waters
Somehow I just can't picture Tom yelling "Oh my!" in the most annoying
way possible when someone rings in and misses a tough interrupt. Or
spouting out that a certain team has won before the first toss up (just
as McMahon does whenever there's a cover.)
And somehow I don't see Lex Lugar, Bret Hart, Diesel, and Shawn Michaels
playing for Armstrong anytime this existance either..
--
Jeffrey Mason Jones (jmj...@unity.ncsu.edu)
Professional Immature Freshman