Who are all you people?
erik
> are you?
WELL,
I am a dynamic figure, often seen scaling walls and crushing ice. I have
been known
to remodel train stations on my lunch breaks, making them more efficient in
the area
of heat retention. I translate ethnic slurs for Cuban refugees, I write
award-winning
operas, I manage time efficiently. Occasionally, I tread water for three
days in a row.
I woo women with my sensuous and godlike trombone playing, I can pilot
bicycles up
severe inclines with unflagging speed, and I cook Thirty-Minute Brownies in
twenty
minutes. I am an expert in stucco, a veteran in love, and an outlaw in Peru.
Using only a hoe and a large glass of water, I once single-handedly defended
a small
village in the Amazon Basin from a horde of ferocious army ants. I play
bluegrass
cello, I was scouted by the Mets, I am the subject of numerous
documentaries. When
I'm bored, I build large suspension bridges in my yard. I enjoy urban hang
gliding. On
Wednesdays, after school, I repair electrical appliances free of charge.
I am an abstract artist, a concrete analyst, and a ruthless bookie. Critics
worldwide
swoon over my original line of corduroy evening wear. I don't perspire. I am
a private
citizen, yet I receive fan mail. I have been caller number nine and have won
the
weekend passes. Last summer I toured New Jersey with a traveling
centrifugal-force
demonstration. I bat .400. My deft floral arrangements have earned me fame
in
international botany circles. Children trust me.
I can hurl tennis rackets at small moving objects with deadly accuracy. I
once read
Paradise Lost, Moby Dick, and David Copperfield in one day and still had
time to
refurbish an entire dining room that evening. I know the exact location of
every food
item in the supermarket. I have performed several covert operations for the
CIA. I sleep
once a week; when I do sleep, I sleep in a chair. While on vacation in
Canada, I
successfully negotiated with a group of terrorists who had seized a small
bakery. The
laws of physics do not apply to me.
I balance, I weave, I dodge, I frolic, and my bills are all paid. On
weekends, to let off
steam, I participate in full-contact origami. Years ago I discovered the
meaning of life
but forgot to write it down. I have made extraordinary four course meals
using only a
mouli and a toaster oven. I breed prizewinning clams. I have won bullfights
in San
Juan, cliff-diving competitions in Sri Lanka, and spelling bees at the
Kremlin. I have
played Hamlet, I have performed open-heart surgery, and I have spoken with
Elvis.
But I have not yet gone to college.
erik
--
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Sean St.
I am part of the witness protection program. I watched a high up mob
boss litter, and I testified against him. Yeah....
Sean (Shh!) St.
--
Relax. Have Fun. Be happy.
Gina
morning in the 6th grade with my zipper down the whole time.
--
It ain't the size, it's the..... no, it's the size.
Gina
erik wrote:
> > I'm fairly new to this news group, and have no idea who anyone is. Who
> > are you?
>
TC3
sandbox at the ripe old age of 3. It all went downhill after that! Heh.
TC3
Gina <LilBi...@att.net> wrote in message news:38352E75...@att.net...
Gina
with toys when I was 2. At least that's the story I get from my
parents. Mom said it had to be a couple days old when she found it.
I've often wondered that if this story is true, what the hell did they
do to me to piss me off bad enough to do that?
And why, oh why do they have to tell the story at every blasted
Thanksgiving dinner?
--
Wash, rinse and repeat
Gina
erik
about the dog pooping, say, but I can't belch loudly and blow it in
her face! GEEZ!!
.....er....meebee it's not the same....
erik
--
http://www.eliteentertainment.net
free famous fonts, bizarre photos, news, comics, recipes, chat,
consumer news, editorials, tributes to Nolan Ryan, John Elway,
The Beatles, Tom Petty, and much more!
change the 'not' to 'net' to reply
.
Denise <tdt...@erols.com> wrote in message
news:813i0u$fuo$1...@autumn.news.rcn.net...
>
> Gina <LilBi...@att.net> wrote in message
news:3835494D...@att.net...
> You know, I love the topics that parents think are ok for dinner
discussion
> in front of family you see once a year. Yet I mention something
about dog
> shit and my mom will say, "Now, Denise I am trying to eat."
>
> Go figure!
>
> Denise
>
> >
> >
>
>
Gina
erik wrote:
> HA! I'm LOL! I know exactly what you mean! Like my fiance can talk
> about the dog pooping, say, but I can't belch loudly and blow it in
> her face! GEEZ!!
Oh..my....Gaaaaaaad.
erik
> > about the dog pooping, say, but I can't belch loudly and blow it
in
> > her face! GEEZ!!
>
> Oh..my....Gaaaaaaad.
um...er....uh...not....uh...that I DO that or anything...*blushing*
heh heh..