Shameless Self Promotion // Rob
Rob
Poetry Slam Champion, 2006 at the Cheltenham Literature Festival on
Saturday. Fortunately, the Slam audience (400 plus) appeared to
understand what I was saying so I assume that we had no one in from
Shadowville.
In addition to the prizes (wine, books, and a little money) I have a
guest spot back at the Festival next Saturday where I'll be appearing,
albeit briefly, in the Roger McGough Poetry Party with him, Brian
Patten, Adrian Mitchell and John Agard (amongst others). How cool is
that?
Rob
--
Rob Evans
Poetry is the needle that pricks your finger;
everything else is the haystack
Will Dockery
Rob wrote:
> For those of you who are interested in such things, I became the UK
> Poetry Slam Champion, 2006 at the Cheltenham Literature Festival on
> Saturday. Fortunately, the Slam audience (400 plus) appeared to
> understand what I was saying so I assume that we had no one in from
> Shadowville.
Apparently my constructive criticism of your previous performance
helped... congratulations, Rob!
--
"Hasty Pudding" by Will Dockery-Henry Conley
http://www.myspace.com/willdockery
TAS, featuring the song "Fadeaway Encounter", written by
Dockery-Conley:
http://www.johnhmaloney.com/tuesdayshow/tasep34.mp3
ggamble
>For those of you who are interested in such things, I became the UK
>Poetry Slam Champion, 2006 at the Cheltenham Literature Festival on
>Saturday. Fortunately, the Slam audience (400 plus) appeared to
>understand what I was saying so I assume that we had no one in from
>Shadowville.
>
>In addition to the prizes (wine, books, and a little money) I have a
>guest spot back at the Festival next Saturday where I'll be appearing,
>albeit briefly, in the Roger McGough Poetry Party with him, Brian
>Patten, Adrian Mitchell and John Agard (amongst others). How cool is
>that?
>
>Rob
Congratulations, Rob!
Michael Cook
"Rob" <r...@mla001.demon.co.uk> wrote in message
news:9QgX8WOz...@mla001.demon.co.uk...
what did you win with,
lets see...
congrats
mdc
Paul Hansford
year, but when I did, I failed to get past the first round. I think my work
just wasn't silly enough for most of the audience.
How uncool is that?
And it isn't just sour grapes (honest!), but wasn't this just a /qualifier/
for the UK All Stars? The Festival programme seemed to think it was
Paul
Poets are the pricks that needle your haystack;
everyone else gets the finger.
"Rob" <r...@mla001.demon.co.uk> wrote in message
news:9QgX8WOz...@mla001.demon.co.uk...
ggamble
<paulha...@eggconnect.net> wrote:
> I didn't enter this
>year, but when I did, I failed to get past the first round. I think my work
>just wasn't silly enough for most of the audience.
You've failed to consider other alternatives.
I've read your work.
Paul Hansford
"ggamble" <f...@net.com> wrote in message
news:cb8ii21g5oj40cig3...@4ax.com...
Renay
> Slam Champion, 2006 at the Cheltenham Literature Festival on Saturday.
> Fortunately, the Slam audience (400 plus) appeared to understand what I
> was saying so I assume that we had no one in from Shadowville.
>
> In addition to the prizes (wine, books, and a little money) I have a guest
> spot back at the Festival next Saturday where I'll be appearing, albeit
> briefly, in the Roger McGough Poetry Party with him, Brian Patten, Adrian
> Mitchell and John Agard (amongst others). How cool is that?
>
> Rob
yay for you! CONGRATULATIONS!
Renay
Barbara's Cat
> For those of you who are interested in such things, I became the UK
> Poetry Slam Champion, 2006 at the Cheltenham Literature Festival on
> Saturday. Fortunately, the Slam audience (400 plus) appeared to
> understand what I was saying so I assume that we had no one in from
> Shadowville.
>
> In addition to the prizes (wine, books, and a little money) I have a
> guest spot back at the Festival next Saturday where I'll be appearing,
> albeit briefly, in the Roger McGough Poetry Party with him, Brian
> Patten, Adrian Mitchell and John Agard (amongst others). How cool is
> that?
>
> Rob
Congratulations!
--
Cm~
Beau Blue
>For those of you who are interested in such things, I became the UK
>Poetry Slam Champion, 2006 at the Cheltenham Literature Festival on
>Saturday. Fortunately, the Slam audience (400 plus) appeared to
>understand what I was saying so I assume that we had no one in from
>Shadowville.
No one was in from Shallowville 'cause the event wasn't 'noir'
enough for them? They're not interested in anywhere Dickel
isn't served? They couldn't afford the airfare? Were there any
dutchmen present?
>
>In addition to the prizes (wine, books, and a little money) I have a
>guest spot back at the Festival next Saturday where I'll be appearing,
>albeit briefly, in the Roger McGough Poetry Party with him, Brian
>Patten, Adrian Mitchell and John Agard (amongst others). How cool is
>that?
It's tres cool. [salute] You're a stud. Congrats.
-blue
>
>Rob
~ Beau Blue Presents ~ <> http://members.cruzio.com/~jjwebb
Bill Minor * Robert Sward <> Internet Broadsides
Morton Marcus * Renay <> Contemporary American Poetry
~ Blue's Cruzio Cafe ~ <> http://members.cruzio.com/~cafe
Will Dockery
"Beau Blue" wrote:
> Rob wrote:
>
> >For those of you who are interested in such things, I became the UK
> >Poetry Slam Champion, 2006 at the Cheltenham Literature Festival on
> >Saturday. Fortunately, the Slam audience (400 plus) appeared to
> >understand what I was saying so I assume that we had no one in from
> >Shadowville.
>
> No one was in from Shallowville 'cause the event wasn't 'noir'
> enough for them? They're not interested in anywhere Dickel
> isn't served? They couldn't afford the airfare? Were there any
> dutchmen present?
Why /I/ didn't attend? I didn't know about it, it was in England are two
good reasons.
How about you? Why didn't you or anyone else I know of on the newsgroups
attend?
http://www.cheltenhamfestivals.com/whats_on/event_detail.html?id=1189
THE UK ALL STARS POETRY SLAM! QUALIFIER
Event Number: 16
Venue: Town Hall
Unreserved Seating
Fancy a starring role in the UK's slam extravaganza (event 41)? Then take a
stanza on stage and see if your poetry and performance has what it takes to
rival the best of the rest. Or come and join the applaudience - there's all
to cheer for! Fifteen poets only, first come first served, contact Elizabeth
Robertson on 01242 263494 or email
elizabeth...@cheltenham.gov.uk
Looks like /the/ place to be in the UK, though, and again I congratulate
you, Rob, and look forward to more details of the event and the 14 other
poets of the slam.
Rob
<paulha...@eggconnect.net> writes
>For those of you who are totally bored by such things, I didn't enter this
>year, but when I did, I failed to get past the first round. I think my work
>just wasn't silly enough for most of the audience.
>
>How uncool is that?
>
>And it isn't just sour grapes (honest!), but wasn't this just a /qualifier/
>for the UK All Stars? The Festival programme seemed to think it was
If you take a closer look at the programme, you'll see that the
qualifier was the day before and the UK Championship was on Saturday.
Rob
--
Rob Evans
Diana
Rob wrote:
> For those of you who are interested in such things, I became the UK
> Poetry Slam Champion, 2006 at the Cheltenham Literature Festival on
> Saturday. Fortunately, the Slam audience (400 plus) appeared to
> understand what I was saying so I assume that we had no one in from
> Shadowville.
>
> In addition to the prizes (wine, books, and a little money) I have a
> guest spot back at the Festival next Saturday where I'll be appearing,
> albeit briefly, in the Roger McGough Poetry Party with him, Brian
> Patten, Adrian Mitchell and John Agard (amongst others). How cool is
> that?
>
Will Dockery
Paul Hansford wrote:
> For those of you who are totally bored by such things, I didn't enter this
> year, but when I did, I failed to get past the first round. I think my work
> just wasn't silly enough for most of the audience.
Study this so you'll know your audience, this is the sort of
performance they dig:
http://www.bbc.co.uk/berkshire/stage/poets/robevanspoem.ram
Rob's been in the poetry slams in past years as well, the site for the
2002 fest
http://www.bbc.co.uk/gloucestershire/festivals/2002/08/litfest/cheltlit.shtml
mentions "...Rob Evans, poetry slam heavyweight...", though no mention
if he won any previous ones.
Seems to be an event not to be missed for poets in the UK area, so
don't give up.
leic...@bellsouth.net
Rob wrote:
> For those of you who are interested in such things, I became the UK
> Poetry Slam Champion, 2006 at the Cheltenham Literature Festival on
> Saturday. Fortunately, the Slam audience (400 plus) appeared to
> understand what I was saying so I assume that we had no one in from
> Shadowville.
>
> In addition to the prizes (wine, books, and a little money) I have a
> guest spot back at the Festival next Saturday where I'll be appearing,
> albeit briefly, in the Roger McGough Poetry Party with him, Brian
> Patten, Adrian Mitchell and John Agard (amongst others). How cool is
> that?
It's way cool.
Congratulations!
No reply necessary (but a reply would be like an authograph).
Stuart
Paul Hansford
(thanks to Will for the details) -
THE UK ALL STARS POETRY SLAM! QUALIFIER
Fancy a starring role in the UK's slam extravaganza? <snip> Fifteen poets
only, first come first served, contact Elizabeth Robertson on 01242 263494
or email
Hmm! So there were "Fifteen poets only, first come first served" and you
ended up top of them! Champion of 15 entries, that is, and anyone could
enter, even my humble self, if I'd been quick enough or interested.
Still enough bitching; you got the title. And after all, you've had plenty
of people congratulate you on the evidence of your ... now what did you call
it? Oh yes ... Shameless Self Promotion (couldn't have put it better myself)
and a little judicious name-dropping. Heavens, Will's even tried to grab
some reflected glory for himself, and how sad is that?
It is, however, interesting that, so far, only one of the multitude has
asked for a sample of the Meisterwerk. Please, you would not only satisfy
my curiosity, but also gratify your adoring groupies, if you were to post
the pieces you performed - 2 was it, or 3? - or even one of them, so we
could get a flavour.
How do you feel about proving your merit to the wider public?
P
"Rob" <r...@mla001.demon.co.uk> wrote in message
news:ecbfPkSe...@mla001.demon.co.uk...
ggamble
<paulha...@eggconnect.net> wrote:
> Heavens, Will's even tried to grab
>some reflected glory for himself, and how sad is that?
It's only a few degrees sadder than what you're doing now.
Paul Hansford
sadder than me. Some hope for me yet?
"ggamble" <f...@net.com> wrote in message
news:ltgji2t4k6r6r0q1a...@4ax.com...
Will Dockery
"Paul Hansford" wrote
>
> Thanks Rob, you're right - the qualifier was the day before, which was
> (thanks to Will for the details) -
>
> THE UK ALL STARS POETRY SLAM! QUALIFIER
> Fancy a starring role in the UK's slam extravaganza? <snip> Fifteen poets
> only, first come first served, contact Elizabeth Robertson on 01242 263494
> or email
>
> Hmm! So there were "Fifteen poets only, first come first served" and you
> ended up top of them! Champion of 15 entries, that is, and anyone could
> enter, even my humble self, if I'd been quick enough or interested.
It would have been cool if you'd been in it, or anyone else on these
newsgroups... funny that someone asked me why /I/ wasn't in the poetry slam,
and even funnier that neither he or /anyone/ else here was in it... wonder
why?
Didn't you write earlier that you have entered the poetry slam in one or
more past years?
Which year(s)?
It would be interesting to read what the experience was like for you, and
the other poets involved in that one, as Rob will hopefully report on this
one.
With more exposure on the internet (and of coutse on Usenet) there could
have been a wider variety of poets from the UK and beyond represented, and
perhaps next year this will happen.
> Still enough bitching; you got the title. And after all, you've had
plenty
> of people congratulate you on the evidence of your ... now what did you
call
> it? Oh yes ... Shameless Self Promotion (couldn't have put it better
myself)
If you had won you wouldn't have made an announcement here?
> and a little judicious name-dropping. Heavens, Will's even tried to grab
> some reflected glory for himself, and how sad is that?
"Refelected glory"? Not at all.
No, the man had the balls to go for it, he won it, and I've congratulated
him for now being the "best poet in the UK"... If you'd entered and won I'd
have done the same.
I don't mind you bitching about the outcome, but I need no help being
dragged into the middle (the "glory") of it... after all, Rob made the first
post mentioning Shadowville, which was funny and a reference to my critique
of an earlier performance of his, apparently:
http://www.bbc.co.uk/berkshire/stage/poets/robevanspoem.ram
Since this is his first win after other tries, it's easy to conclude that he
worked on his earlier faults, tightened up, and had the edge to win this
one.
> It is, however, interesting that, so far, only one of the multitude has
> asked for a sample of the Meisterwerk. Please, you would not only satisfy
> my curiosity, but also gratify your adoring groupies, if you were to post
> the pieces you performed - 2 was it, or 3? - or even one of them, so we
> could get a flavour.
>
> How do you feel about proving your merit to the wider public?
Knowing Rob, I doubt he'll have /any/ problem with posting the winning
entries... perhaps they were even recorded?
I'd like to know more about the other 14 poets, as well, which hopefully
he'll get around to naming and/or describing.
Dennis M. Hammes
> For those of you who are interested in such things, I became the UK
> Poetry Slam Champion, 2006 at the Cheltenham Literature Festival on
> Saturday. Fortunately, the Slam audience (400 plus) appeared to
> understand what I was saying so I assume that we had no one in from
> Shadowville.
>
> In addition to the prizes (wine, books, and a little money) I have a
> guest spot back at the Festival next Saturday where I'll be appearing,
> albeit briefly, in the Roger McGough Poetry Party with him, Brian
> Patten, Adrian Mitchell and John Agard (amongst others). How cool is that?
>
> Rob
Pretty cool.
Even for a Brit...
--
-------(m+
~/:o)_|
I do not "negotiate" for half my baby back, Solomon.
http://scrawlmark.org
Rob
<paulha...@eggconnect.net> writes
>Thanks Rob, you're right - the qualifier was the day before, which was
>(thanks to Will for the details) -
>
>THE UK ALL STARS POETRY SLAM! QUALIFIER
>Fancy a starring role in the UK's slam extravaganza? <snip> Fifteen poets
>only, first come first served, contact Elizabeth Robertson on 01242 263494
>or email
>
>Hmm! So there were "Fifteen poets only, first come first served" and you
>ended up top of them!
There were fifteen poets in the final. I have no idea of how many in
the qualifiers. Some of us were seeded and didn't have to qualify
(hence the "All Stars"). We were seeded because we had all won many
previous slams.
> Champion of 15 entries, that is, and anyone could
>enter, even my humble self, if I'd been quick enough or interested.
Or talented.
>
>Still enough bitching;
Evidence to date suggests this is unlikely.
> you got the title. And after all, you've had plenty
>of people congratulate you on the evidence of your ... now what did you call
>it? Oh yes ... Shameless Self Promotion (couldn't have put it better myself)
>and a little judicious name-dropping.
So, bitching's still working for you, then?
> Heavens, Will's even tried to grab
>some reflected glory for himself, and how sad is that?
>
>It is, however, interesting that, so far, only one of the multitude has
>asked for a sample of the Meisterwerk. Please, you would not only satisfy
>my curiosity, but also gratify your adoring groupies,
Yep, definitely still working.
> if you were to post
>the pieces you performed - 2 was it, or 3? - or even one of them, so we
>could get a flavour.
It was 4. They've all been posted here before but I'll repost at
Michael's request.
>
>How do you feel about proving your merit to the wider public?
You mean other than Slams and performances at Literature Festivals and
the Edinburgh, Birmingham and Windsor? Or perhaps you are the wider
public? Good to know it has such a generous nature..
>
Rob
--
Rob Evans
When I see a swine
I reach for 45-calibre pearls.
Rob
Cook <coo...@speakeasy.net> writes
Thanks Michael - they poems are printed below but I think they've all
been posted here before.
The Early Chicken Butters No Moss
Maud has a wayward way with a word,
absurd and awkward aphorisms
are born bewildered when she speaks.
She and the English language reach
for each other warily and finally,
when they touch, strange sparks fly free.
For her, an itch in time saves none,
an ill wind blows a dog a bad bone
and a wise stone knows to roll its own.
She'd never cross a bridge before it's burned,
she'd never leave a worm unturned
in her search for the unvanished truth.
Her sole contribution to economic theory
is to say that the reckless spending of money
should be avoided … at any cost.
If this woman were ever drowning,
downing for the third time, I swear
her whole loaf would flush before her thighs.
Listen to her and, after a while,
the surreal becomes so real it starts
to make a terrible kind of sense.
Maud, of course would disagree. She says
storks and stains can break your brains
but words can never charm you.
Quantum Mechanics - What Do They Do All Day?
I'll tell you. They draw the blinds, and sit in the dark
thinking up ways of marketing the sub-atomic Quark.
I looked up Quark in both my pocket dictionaries
and they agree - it's a type of low-fat German cheese.
Call me old-fashioned but I can't see it as a winner
with the odd grape and cream cracker after dinner.
I mean, you could pile this stuff up 10 to the power 13 wedges thick
and you still couldn't see it on your celery stick.
Now physicists want to sell us Quarks in a range
of six flavours called Top, Bottom, Up, Down, Charm and Strange.
Product promotion is not my game
but shouldn't words like Dairylea appear somewhere in the name?
Let's face it, physicists are crap at naming things -
all their ideas come straight straight from The Lord Of The Rings -
listen: lepton, kaon, deuteron, baryon,
meson, hadron, the list goes on and on.
Behold the mighty particles that dwell
in the Halls of Cyclotron... in Rivendell.
These anoraks believe the secret of the universe will be revealed
when the atomic hosts are gathered in a Grand Unified Field.
I suppose that's where they keep the tiny cows they need to milk
to make the quark.
Logically, these cows should be called Muons but no,
they gave that name to something that lasts
a zillionth of a second or so.
Why - what's the point? If you find this overweight electron,
what are you going to say?
It's gone again. Bye,
have a nice 2.5429 times 10 to the power -11 of a day.
By now, if you're a physicist, you'll be thinking:
Is he getting at me? Has he been drinking?
Do these insults pass for poetry?
Well, yes this is a poem. And no, this is not a poem. Simultaneously.
Think of it as Art's revenge for Schrodinger's bloody Cat.
That's right. This is a poem, but only when you are not observing it.
Shall We Call This Love?
You have grown on me,
like blue mould on old bread,
like a silent, second head
on a horror-comic,
post-atomic
war baby.
I am stuck on you
and I can't break your grip,
it's like we're joined at the hip
by a surface-wetting,
rapid-setting
superglue.
You're a good thing,
like an aspirin for pain,
an umbrella in the rain
or like two hands sharing,
each hand wearing
one gold ring.
If we ever part,
you will get a friendly hug
followed by a manly shrug
as I go, never showing
that it's snowing
in my heart.
Shall we call this love?
Not to make too much of it,
it's a name that seems to fit
all my daft devotions
and emotions
like a glove.
Love On Ice
They made love whatever, there or here;
they didn't let life's obligations interfere.
Many a time, she joined him under the car
and helped him to forget about repair;
many a time, the Sunday roast was left to char
while they got quite athletic on a kitchen chair.
To keep their marriage fresh, they thought it wise
for love to have the element of surprise.
One day, as she was bending over the freezer,
the fish fingers were forgotten as he seized her.
They pedalled hard to ecstasy, in tandem
and then...
the manager of Sainsburys banned them.
US translation: Sainsburys = Walmart
Will Dockery
Paul Hansford wrote:
>
> My, what a quick reply, GG. But I'm gratified to note that you think it's
> sadder than me. Some hope for me yet?
Gasfly's replies are always quick because, saddest of all, he really
hasn't anything to say.
--
"Hasty Pudding" by Will Dockery-Henry Conley
http://www.myspace.com/willdockery
TAS, featuring the song "Fadeaway Encounter", written by
Dockery-Conley:
http://www.johnhmaloney.com/tuesdayshow/tasep34.mp3
> "ggamble" <f...@net.com> wrote in message
Paul Hansford
well as long boring messages, I shall snip quite a bit. (I hope nobody
accuses me of selective quoting to make points.) You said -
> There were fifteen poets in the final. I have no idea of how many in the
> qualifiers. Some of us were seeded and didn't have to qualify (hence the
> "All Stars"). We were seeded because we had all won many previous slams.
But the Festival blurb clearly said
>>Fancy a starring role in the UK's slam extravaganza? Fifteen poets
>>only, first come first served,
Looks like a bit of a mismatch there, but let it pass.
>>Still enough bitching; you got the title. And after all, you've had
>>plenty
>>of people congratulate you on the evidence of your ... now what did you
>>call
>>it? Oh yes ... Shameless Self Promotion (couldn't have put it better
>>myself)
>>and a little judicious name-dropping.
>
> So, bitching's still working for you, then?
>
No, I'd just call that irony, or heavy sarcasm if you prefer, and if you
can't take that on /this/ ng, you must be pretty thin-skinned.
>> Heavens, Will's even tried to grab
>>some reflected glory for himself, and how sad is that?
Will has replied to that, and I take his point. It did look like what I
said though.
>> if you were to post
>>the pieces you performed - 2 was it, or 3? - or even one of them, so we
>>could get a flavour.
>
> It was 4. They've all been posted here before but I'll repost at
> Michael's request.
OK, when I entered it was maximum of 3, but you could get by on 2. And
thanks for reposting "at Michael's request." I can see you couldn't bear to
do it for me.
>>How do you feel about proving your merit to the wider public?
>
> You mean other than Slams and performances at Literature Festivals and the
> Edinburgh, Birmingham and Windsor?
I mean wider than the people who go to slams, who tend to travel between
festivals (like yourself) and consequently audiences are at least partly
composed of the same people. In particular, I mean people outside the UK,
who only know you through the ng, if at all.
And in reply to Will's enquiry -
> If you had won you wouldn't have made an announcement here?
- the answer is positively No. I wouldn't have announced that any more than
I have announced any publication of my work, or competition prizes (oh
bugger, now I've mentioned them!). Hope you don't mind my including it
here, Will, it just seemed appropriate.
P
I shan't mind if there isn't a reply to this, but if anyone feels I
shouldn't have the last word, be my guest. I think I've finished (and
please don't reply just to say Thank God for that).
---------------------------
When I see a haystack
I reach for 45-calibre needles.
Will Dockery
Paul Hansford wrote:
>
> I feel I owe you a reply to this, but as I hate to see multiple quotes, as
> well as long boring messages, I shall snip quite a bit. (I hope nobody
> accuses me of selective quoting to make points.) You said -
> > There were fifteen poets in the final. I have no idea of how many in the
> > qualifiers. Some of us were seeded and didn't have to qualify (hence the
> > "All Stars"). We were seeded because we had all won many previous slams.
>
> But the Festival blurb clearly said
> >>Fancy a starring role in the UK's slam extravaganza? Fifteen poets
> >>only, first come first served,
> Looks like a bit of a mismatch there, but let it pass.
Something seems a bit mixed up... the website seems to put it out as an
"open call" to any poet reading it that wanted to show... "first come
first serve", yet Rob reveals there were ringers brought in. He doesn't
give a number of how many were "seeded", and who had to go through the
qualification rounds the night before.
It comes across as a bit deceptive.
Perhaps Elizabeth Robertson (01242 263494 or email
elizabeth...@cheltenham.gov.uk ), who's listed as contact-person
for the event, would be able to give more details.
> >>Still enough bitching; you got the title. And after all, you've had
> >>plenty
> >>of people congratulate you on the evidence of your ... now what did you
> >>call
> >>it? Oh yes ... Shameless Self Promotion (couldn't have put it better
> >>myself)
> >>and a little judicious name-dropping.
> >
> > So, bitching's still working for you, then?
> >
> No, I'd just call that irony, or heavy sarcasm if you prefer, and if you
> can't take that on /this/ ng, you must be pretty thin-skinned.
>
> >> Heavens, Will's even tried to grab
> >>some reflected glory for himself, and how sad is that?
> Will has replied to that, and I take his point. It did look like what I
> said though.
Since Rob was compelled to bring me into his short announcement (the
space could have been better used by listing the 14 also-rans or
something) he gave the nod that my critique was helpful in driving him
to improve his performance from his previous attempt, apparently:
http://www.bbc.co.uk/berkshire/stage/poets/robevanspoem.ram
> >> if you were to post
> >>the pieces you performed - 2 was it, or 3? - or even one of them, so we
> >>could get a flavour.
> >
> > It was 4. They've all been posted here before but I'll repost at
> > Michael's request.
>
> OK, when I entered it was maximum of 3, but you could get by on 2.
Why not post the poems you entered with here?
> And thanks for reposting "at Michael's request." I can see you couldn't bear to
> do it for me.
>
> >>How do you feel about proving your merit to the wider public?
> >
> > You mean other than Slams and performances at Literature Festivals and the
> > Edinburgh, Birmingham and Windsor?
>
> I mean wider than the people who go to slams, who tend to travel between
> festivals (like yourself) and consequently audiences are at least partly
> composed of the same people. In particular, I mean people outside the UK,
> who only know you through the ng, if at all.
Hopefully next year's poetry slam will be widely announced on Usenet so
the range of participants (in the UK and beyond) can make plans to
attend if they want, rather than hearing about it after it ends.
http://www.cheltenhamfestivals.com/whats_on/literature/special_projects.html?id=39
After all, the winner walks away as the champion UK poet of the year.
> And in reply to Will's enquiry -
> > If you had won you wouldn't have made an announcement here?
> - the answer is positively No. I wouldn't have announced that any more than
> I have announced any publication of my work, or competition prizes (oh
> bugger, now I've mentioned them!).
Why not?
After all, that's what Usenet is for, announcements and promotional
items such as Rob's.
> Hope you don't mind my including it
> here, Will, it just seemed appropriate.
Actually, I'd like to read more about it... definitely more details on
your experiences with the poetry slam in the previous year, and even
more so if you decide to enter and win next year.
--
"Hasty Pudding" by Will Dockery-Henry Conley
http://www.myspace.com/willdockery
TAS, featuring the song "Fadeaway Encounter", written by
Dockery-Conley:
http://www.johnhmaloney.com/tuesdayshow/tasep34.mp3
> I shan't mind if there isn't a reply to this, but if anyone feels I
Beau Blue
Do people in New York City, Philadelphia, Chicago, St. Louis,
Minneapolis, San Francisco, and LA count? I mean, I know a
bunch of people in each of those cities that consider themselves
fans of Rob Evans' poetry.
I've noticed a lot of net traffic from Japan, Mexico, Germany and
Italy accessing his poem 'Rumpelstiltskin' over at the cafe. As well,
there's a huge number of visitors to the cafe from Amsterdam who have
downloaded Rob's performance. Your definition of 'wider audience'
demands interested audience members from outside the UK. So, OK,
that would mean people from the USA and the rest of Europe, right?
Have you got any idea what you're talking about? Or are you just
woofing and wailing to prove your value to Willie Twitch and your
cluelessness to the rest of us?
-blue
>
>And in reply to Will's enquiry -
>> If you had won you wouldn't have made an announcement here?
>- the answer is positively No. I wouldn't have announced that any more than
>I have announced any publication of my work, or competition prizes (oh
>bugger, now I've mentioned them!). Hope you don't mind my including it
>here, Will, it just seemed appropriate.
>
>P
>
>I shan't mind if there isn't a reply to this, but if anyone feels I
>shouldn't have the last word, be my guest. I think I've finished (and
>please don't reply just to say Thank God for that).
>
> ---------------------------
> When I see a haystack
> I reach for 45-calibre needles.
>
~ Beau Blue Presents ~ <> http://members.cruzio.com/~jjwebb
Beau Blue
>On Mon, 09 Oct 2006 04:49:14 -0700, Will Dockery wrote:
>
>>
>> Paul Hansford wrote:
>>>
>>> My, what a quick reply, GG. But I'm gratified to note that you think
>>> it's sadder than me. Some hope for me yet?
>>
>> Gasfly's replies are always quick because, saddest of all, he really
>> hasn't anything to say.
>
>I've watched you reply to many posts within minutes. So by your own
>admission, you really have nothing to say.
Twitch has always got something to say. It's usually, "gurgle, gurgle,
mumble. schtumble, mumble-mumble, Zaahrooooow!" Or something
close to that. It's always hard to tell with the dickel-pickled head
dachshund, but many agree that's pretty much the gist of most of his
comments.
-blue
ggamble
<paulha...@eggconnect.net> wrote:
>My, what a quick reply, GG. But I'm gratified to note that you think it's
>sadder than me. Some hope for me yet?
Maybe you're a sloppy writer because you're such a lazy reader.
That's often the case.
Will Dockery
"Beau Blue" wrote:
> Italy accessing his poem 'Rumpelstiltskin' over at the cafe. As well,
> there's a huge number of visitors to the cafe from Amsterdam who have
> downloaded Rob's performance.
So someone hitting the link instantly makes them a fan?
--
"Hasty Pudding" by Will Dockery-Henry Conley
http://www.myspace.com/willdockery
TAS, featuring the song "Fadeaway Encounter", written by Dockery-Conley:
http://www.johnhmaloney.com/tuesdayshow/tasep34.mp3
> >And in reply to Will's enquiry -
Rob
<paulha...@eggconnect.net> writes
>I feel I owe you a reply to this, but as I hate to see multiple quotes, as
>well as long boring messages, I shall snip quite a bit. (I hope nobody
>accuses me of selective quoting to make points.) You said -
>> There were fifteen poets in the final. I have no idea of how many in the
>> qualifiers. Some of us were seeded and didn't have to qualify (hence the
>> "All Stars"). We were seeded because we had all won many previous slams.
>
>But the Festival blurb clearly said
>>>Fancy a starring role in the UK's slam extravaganza? Fifteen poets
>>>only, first come first served,
>Looks like a bit of a mismatch there, but let it pass.
Looks like a plain misleading error on the part of whoever wrote the
blurb..
>
>>>Still enough bitching; you got the title. And after all, you've had
>>>plenty
>>>of people congratulate you on the evidence of your ... now what did you
>>>call
>>>it? Oh yes ... Shameless Self Promotion (couldn't have put it better
>>>myself)
>>>and a little judicious name-dropping.
>>
>> So, bitching's still working for you, then?
>>
>No, I'd just call that irony, or heavy sarcasm if you prefer, and if you
>can't take that on /this/ ng, you must be pretty thin-skinned.
I prefer to describe it as heavy sarcasm. Irony implies self-awareness.
>
>>> Heavens, Will's even tried to grab
>>>some reflected glory for himself, and how sad is that?
>Will has replied to that, and I take his point. It did look like what I
>said though.
He may well have. It wasn't my point in the first place. Heavy
snipping can produce such confusion.
>
>>> if you were to post
>>>the pieces you performed - 2 was it, or 3? - or even one of them, so we
>>>could get a flavour.
>>
>> It was 4. They've all been posted here before but I'll repost at
>> Michael's request.
>
>OK, when I entered it was maximum of 3, but you could get by on 2.
You have little chance in slams if you can't grasp the rules. There has
never been a limit on the number of poems - just the time. In a final
it's usually 3 minutes each per round. I did two 2:50 poems and two
1:25 poems to fill the 3 slots.
> And
>thanks for reposting "at Michael's request." I can see you couldn't bear to
>do it for me.
Michael asked me first. Or were you just bitching - sorry - being ironic
again?
>
>>>How do you feel about proving your merit to the wider public?
>>
>> You mean other than Slams and performances at Literature Festivals and the
>> Edinburgh, Birmingham and Windsor?
>
>I mean wider than the people who go to slams, who tend to travel between
>festivals (like yourself) and consequently audiences are at least partly
>composed of the same people. In particular, I mean people outside the UK,
>who only know you through the ng, if at all.
And how would that work exactly? Do you think poetry makes enough money
to justify a world tour? Anyway, the audiences at the Edinburgh
Festival are pretty varied and I've also done readings at poetry clubs
and theatres throughout the UK so I don't think the audience is THAT
narrow. And unlike this ng, it's a true audience that has to pay to get
in. If they don't like your stuff, they don't come. Bums on seat is at
least one concrete measure of merit.
>
>And in reply to Will's enquiry -
>> If you had won you wouldn't have made an announcement here?
>- the answer is positively No. I wouldn't have announced that any more than
>I have announced any publication of my work, or competition prizes (oh
>bugger, now I've mentioned them!).
And I'm sure that everyone here would respect your personal choice.
However, over the years, it has become customary for people to announce
small triumphs here, including appearances and publications, under the
heading of "Shameless Self Promotion". It generally provokes a few
congratulations and the occasional "irony".
Beau Blue
You see, Bill, you have to restore the paragraph you snipped, the one
that made reference to 'fans', in order for this question to make any
sense. But, when you restore that paragraph, then the question seems
completely ridiculous because that paragrah plainly states where the
'fans' come from.
Someone hitting the link makes 'em audience. That would make 'em
a "wider" public. 'Specially when you throw in Asia. Traffic from
there and from other places in the world, South America, Australia,
Russia makes for an audience Paul might consider "wider" than just
the UK. Understand? Probably not, huh?
The snip and the question placement reveals your stupidity once
again and that HAS to be why you're here, right? It is the only thing
you know how to communicate, Twitch, how very, very sad you are.
And your need to let everyone know it is very Chunk like. You should
start a blog, you know?
-blue
Will Dockery
Beau Blue wrote:
> a "wider" public. 'Specially when you throw in Asia. Traffic from
> there and from other places in the world, South America, Australia,
> Russia makes for an audience Paul might consider "wider" than just
> the UK.
Something I've known all along, Blue... get the links out there and
build an /audience/ through /hits/.
Will Dockery
Beau Blue wrote:
> > Paul Hansford wrote:
>
> >>> My, what a quick reply, GG. But I'm gratified to note that you think
> >>> it's sadder than me. Some hope for me yet?
> >>
> >> Gasfly's replies are always quick because, saddest of all, he really
> >> hasn't anything to say.
> >
> >I've watched you reply to many posts within minutes. So by your own
> >admission, you really have nothing to say.
>
> Twitch
You do seem a bit /jerky/ today, Blue.
Will Dockery
Meat Plow wrote:
> On Mon, 09 Oct 2006 06:58:14 -0700, Will Dockery wrote:
>
> > deceptive
>
> Yes Will
For once we agree, Meat.
Will Dockery
Meat Plow wrote:
>
> Yes, that you are deceptive.
Takes one to know one, perhaps?
Dennis M. Hammes
>
> The Early Chicken Butters No Moss
>
>
> Quantum Mechanics - What Do They Do All Day?
>
>
> Shall We Call This Love?
>
>
> Love On Ice
>
> Rob
>
Heh x4. Tnx.
Dennis M. Hammes
> Beau Blue wrote:
>
>>>Paul Hansford wrote:
>>
>>>>>My, what a quick reply, GG. But I'm gratified to note that you think
>>>>>it's sadder than me. Some hope for me yet?
>>>>
>>>>Gasfly's replies are always quick because, saddest of all, he really
>>>>hasn't anything to say.
>>>
>>>I've watched you reply to many posts within minutes. So by your own
>>>admission, you really have nothing to say.
>>
>>Twitch
>
>
> You do seem a bit /jerky/ today, Blue.
>
See?
Dennis M. Hammes
> On Mon, 9 Oct 2006 04:40:31 +0100, "Paul Hansford"
> <paulha...@eggconnect.net> wrote:
>
>
>
>
>>My, what a quick reply, GG. But I'm gratified to note that you think it's
>>sadder than me. Some hope for me yet?
>
>
>
> Maybe you're a sloppy writer because you're such a lazy reader.
> That's often the case.
>
Duckurpy can read?
Vera
Vera
Dennis M. Hammes
> On Mon, 09 Oct 2006 21:16:55 -0700, Will Dockery Has Frothed:
>
>
>>Meat Plow wrote:
>>
>>>Yes, that you are deceptive.
>>
>>Takes one to know one, perhaps?
>
>
> Everyone is deceptive. You're just one of those who has polished it into
> a fine art.
>
That's "Performance Art" to you, Meat.
Will Dockery
Meat Plow wrote:
> On Wed, 11 Oct 2006 21:16:55 -0700, Will Dockery wrote:
> >>
> >> Yes, that you are deceptive.
> >
> > Takes one to know one, perhaps?
>
> a fine art.
"Is this the Will Dockery of the movie or the Will Dockery of the
dream?"
-E Horn
"Writing is creative lying." -H Ellison
--
"Ozone Stigmata" by Will Dockery
http://www.myspace.com/willdockery
The Ride (Combat Zone) by Shadowville All-Stars
Video by Janis Petersen:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9lZ3VAmNTWc
Will Dockery
Meat Plow wrote:
> On Wed, 11 Oct 2006 21:16:55 -0700, Will Dockery wrote:
>
> >> >> Yes, that you are deceptive.
> >> >
> >> > Takes one to know one, perhaps?
> >>
> >> Everyone is deceptive. You're just one of those who has polished it into
> >> a fine art.
> >
> > "Is this the Will Dockery of the movie or the Will Dockery of the dream?"
> > -E Horn
> >
> > "Writing is creative lying." -H Ellison
>
> support a family etc...?
Some things I've done week after week for almost 30 years, to set the
record straight, Meat.
Fun is fun, but now you're slipping into libel.
> Creative lying is fine in prose or poem. But when you live it off pen and
> paper like you do, it's not a good thing to brag about.
Again, takes one to know one, right?
Barbara's Cat
[ snipped for brevity ]
> Quantum Mechanics - What Do They Do All Day?
>
> I'll tell you. They draw the blinds, and sit in the dark
> thinking up ways of marketing the sub-atomic Quark.
> I looked up Quark in both my pocket dictionaries
> and they agree - it's a type of low-fat German cheese.
> Call me old-fashioned but I can't see it as a winner
> with the odd grape and cream cracker after dinner.
>
> I mean, you could pile this stuff up 10 to the power 13 wedges thick
> and you still couldn't see it on your celery stick.
> Now physicists want to sell us Quarks in a range
> of six flavours called Top, Bottom, Up, Down, Charm and Strange.
> Product promotion is not my game
> but shouldn't words like Dairylea appear somewhere in the name?
>
> Let's face it, physicists are crap at naming things -
> all their ideas come straight straight from The Lord Of The Rings -
> listen: lepton, kaon, deuteron, baryon,
> meson, hadron, the list goes on and on.
> Behold the mighty particles that dwell
> in the Halls of Cyclotron... in Rivendell.
>
> These anoraks believe the secret of the universe will be revealed
> when the atomic hosts are gathered in a Grand Unified Field.
> I suppose that's where they keep the tiny cows they need to milk
> to make the quark.
> Logically, these cows should be called Muons but no,
> they gave that name to something that lasts
> a zillionth of a second or so.
>
> Why - what's the point? If you find this overweight electron,
> what are you going to say?
> It's gone again. Bye,
> have a nice 2.5429 times 10 to the power -11 of a day.
> By now, if you're a physicist, you'll be thinking:
> Is he getting at me? Has he been drinking?
> Do these insults pass for poetry?
> Well, yes this is a poem. And no, this is not a poem. Simultaneously.
>
> Think of it as Art's revenge for Schrodinger's bloody Cat.
> That's right. This is a poem, but only when you are not observing it.
>
> Rob
Reading it was better than eating
a can of mandarin oranges.
--
Cm~
Michael Cook
"Barbara's Cat" <c...@XSPAMkookbusters.org> wrote in message
news:MPG.1f97609de...@127.0.0.1...
mdc
Barbara's Cat
>
> "Barbara's Cat" <c...@XSPAMkookbusters.org> wrote:
[ snipped for brevity ]
> > Reading it was better than eating
> > a can of mandarin oranges.
> >
> they come in cans?
> mdc
Yes. Honest.
http://www.delmonte.com/Products/FruitItem.asp?id=91
--
Cm~
Dennis M. Hammes
> "Barbara's Cat" <c...@XSPAMkookbusters.org> wrote in message
> news:MPG.1f97609de...@127.0.0.1...
>
>>
>>Reading it was better than eating
>>a can of mandarin oranges.
>>
>
> they come in cans?
> mdc
>
Yes.
(But not like Duckurpy and Jake.)
In season, they're tufer a buck.
(Again, not like...)
Cripple Jinn
"Rob" <r...@mla001.demon.co.uk> wrote in message news:9QgX8WOz...@mla001.demon.co.uk...
> For those of you who are interested in such things
No one here, loser ...
--
-------------------------------------------
AJ - http://ClitIn.Com e In.
(800 folders. -- kiddie-filtered -- FREE,
Usenet Porn.)
Rob
Jinn <aj...@here.nu> writes
>
>"Rob" <r...@mla001.demon.co.uk> wrote in message
>news:9QgX8WOz...@mla001.demon.co.uk...
>> For those of you who are interested in such things
>
>
>No one here, loser ...
>
sad and lonely little monkey you are.
Rob
--
Rob Evans
When I see a desperate LMD
I reach for 45-calibre bananas.
Dennis M. Hammes
> In message <eJCXg.13572$e66....@newssvr13.news.prodigy.com>, Cripple
> Jinn <aj...@here.nu> writes
>
>>
>> "Rob" <r...@mla001.demon.co.uk> wrote in message
>> news:9QgX8WOz...@mla001.demon.co.uk...
>>
>>> For those of you who are interested in such things
>>
>>
>>
>> No one here, loser ...
>>
> Speaking of which - look who just ooked "Hello cruel newsgroup". What a
> sad and lonely little monkey you are.
>
> Rob
Not even Death could keep him away...
Cripple Jinn
HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAaaa!!!!!
You are all a pack of liars.
Poets??????
HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAaaa!!!!!
robbie never won a thing
HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAaaa!!!!!
And what if he did?????? Toooooo funny.
Cripple Jinn
"Rob" <r...@mla001.demon.co.uk> wrote in message news:W0Qd1CDpALMFFw$c...@mla001.demon.co.uk...
> In message <eJCXg.13572$e66....@newssvr13.news.prodigy.com>, Cripple Jinn <aj...@here.nu> writes
>>
>>"Rob" <r...@mla001.demon.co.uk> wrote in message news:9QgX8WOz...@mla001.demon.co.uk...
>>> For those of you who are interested in such things
>>
>>
>>No one here, loser ...
>>
> Speaking of which - look who just ooked "Hello cruel newsgroup". What a sad and lonely little monkey you are.
Heck... I was just expressing that I didn't give a /rat's-ass/ for your
/whatever/....
You're a loser...
Fuck off and die: loser.
(as stated by your friend peewee)
Cripple Jinn
"Dennis M. Hammes" <scraw...@arvig.net> wrote in message news:aNidneyp6fTlRKzY...@onvoy.com...
> Not even Death could keep him away...
We'll both be dead soon.
If carbon's breath has any thought or care
when stillness settles, grasses of the stone
will sing the song. They're etched without a moan
on granite faces, igneous aware
of dates, the bookends, standing in the air.
And hear the song of death sung by the life-prone
music-men enchoired but each alone.
The music only bares a stone-full prayer.
In songs of granite grasses, simply listen
as tuneful dead now whistle through the runes.
Like dew in morning's glory can but glisten
then dry and die in scorching afternoons;
the babes upon the altars we will christen,
as soon they'll grow the grass that sings their tunes.
Cripple Jinn
I wonder if any of you idiots will produce anything
amusing.
Surely you and robbie are braindead.
--
-------------------------------------------
AJ - http://ClitIn.Com e In.
(800 folders. -- kiddie-filtered -- FREE,
Usenet Porn.)
"Renay" <rena...@yahoo.com> wrote in message news:jJGdnWujUbPLrLTY...@comcast.com...
>
> "Rob" <r...@mla001.demon.co.uk> wrote in message news:9QgX8WOz...@mla001.demon.co.uk...
>> For those of you who are interested in such things, I became the UK Poetry Slam Champion, 2006 at the Cheltenham Literature
>> Festival on Saturday. Fortunately, the Slam audience (400 plus) appeared to understand what I was saying so I assume that we had
>> no one in from Shadowville.
>>
>> In addition to the prizes (wine, books, and a little money) I have a guest spot back at the Festival next Saturday where I'll be
>> appearing, albeit briefly, in the Roger McGough Poetry Party with him, Brian Patten, Adrian Mitchell and John Agard (amongst
>> others). How cool is that?
>>
>> Rob
>
>
> yay for you! CONGRATULATIONS!
>
> Renay
>
>
>
>
Cripple Jinn
--
-------------------------------------------
AJ - http://ClitIn.Com e In.
(800 folders. -- kiddie-filtered -- FREE,
Usenet Porn.)
"Will Dockery" <will_d...@knology.net> wrote in message news:efd53$452964b6$18d651f4$19...@KNOLOGY.NET...
>
> "Beau Blue" wrote:
>> Rob wrote:
>>
>> >For those of you who are interested in such things, I became the UK
>> >Poetry Slam Champion, 2006 at the Cheltenham Literature Festival on
>> >Saturday. Fortunately, the Slam audience (400 plus) appeared to
>> >understand what I was saying so I assume that we had no one in from
>> >Shadowville.
>>
>> No one was in from Shallowville 'cause the event wasn't 'noir'
>> enough for them? They're not interested in anywhere Dickel
>> isn't served? They couldn't afford the airfare? Were there any
>> dutchmen present?
>
> Why /I/ didn't attend? I didn't know about it, it was in England are two
> good reasons.
>
> How about you? Why didn't you or anyone else I know of on the newsgroups
> attend?
>
> http://www.cheltenhamfestivals.com/whats_on/event_detail.html?id=1189
>
> THE UK ALL STARS POETRY SLAM! QUALIFIER
> Event Number: 16
>
> Venue: Town Hall
> Unreserved Seating
>
> Fancy a starring role in the UK's slam extravaganza (event 41)? Then take a
> stanza on stage and see if your poetry and performance has what it takes to
> rival the best of the rest. Or come and join the applaudience - there's all
> to cheer for! Fifteen poets only, first come first served, contact Elizabeth
> Robertson on 01242 263494 or email
> elizabeth...@cheltenham.gov.uk
>
> Looks like /the/ place to be in the UK, though, and again I congratulate
> you, Rob, and look forward to more details of the event and the 14 other
> poets of the slam.
Cripple Jinn
(but my porn is real an online)
--
-------------------------------------------
AJ - http://ClitIn.Com e In.
(800 folders. -- kiddie-filtered -- FREE,
Usenet Porn.)
"Diana" <Diana_of...@excite.com> wrote in message news:1160345389.5...@k70g2000cwa.googlegroups.com...
>
> Rob wrote:
>> For those of you who are interested in such things, I became the UK
>> Poetry Slam Champion, 2006 at the Cheltenham Literature Festival on
>> Saturday. Fortunately, the Slam audience (400 plus) appeared to
>> understand what I was saying so I assume that we had no one in from
>> Shadowville.
>>
>> In addition to the prizes (wine, books, and a little money) I have a
>> guest spot back at the Festival next Saturday where I'll be appearing,
>> albeit briefly, in the Roger McGough Poetry Party with him, Brian
>> Patten, Adrian Mitchell and John Agard (amongst others). How cool is
>> that?
>>
> It's pretty darned cool! Congratulations, Rob!
Cripple Jinn
<leic...@bellsouth.net> wrote in message news:1160357826.6...@i3g2000cwc.googlegroups.com...
>
> No reply necessary (but a reply would be like an authograph).
No, really, MORON...
robbie is lying -- he never <blah>
Fuck off and die, idiot.
Cripple Jinn
"Dennis M. Hammes" <scraw...@arvig.net> wrote in message news:Qd6dnf-
>
> Pretty cool.
> Even for a Brit...
<hick>
Cripple Jinn
Like the cat shit in your front cat shit area.
Heh...
You are a ghetto idiot, no?
"Michael Cook" <coo...@speakeasy.net> wrote in message news:heKdnc7YMcwOjLTY...@speakeasy.net...
>
> "Rob" <r...@mla001.demon.co.uk> wrote in message
> news:9QgX8WOz...@mla001.demon.co.uk...
>> For those of you who are interested in such things, I became the UK
>> Poetry Slam Champion, 2006 at the Cheltenham Literature Festival on
>> Saturday. Fortunately, the Slam audience (400 plus) appeared to
>> understand what I was saying so I assume that we had no one in from
>> Shadowville.
>>
>> In addition to the prizes (wine, books, and a little money) I have a
>> guest spot back at the Festival next Saturday where I'll be appearing,
>> albeit briefly, in the Roger McGough Poetry Party with him, Brian
>> Patten, Adrian Mitchell and John Agard (amongst others). How cool is
>> that?
>>
>> Rob
>> --
>> Rob Evans
>>
>> Poetry is the needle that pricks your finger;
>> everything else is the haystack
>
> what did you win with,
> lets see...
>
> congrats
> mdc
>
>
>
Cripple Jinn
"Rob" <r...@mla001.demon.co.uk> wrote in message news:7KI26kWQ...@mla001.demon.co.uk...
> In message <heKdnc7YMcwOjLTY...@speakeasy.net>, Michael
>>what did you win with,
>>lets see...
>>
>>congrats
>
> Thanks Michael -
Blow me..
You are fucking with a ghetto moron.
You are a LOSER.... FUCK OFF.
Cripple Jinn
robbie is a liar and never <blah>
MORONS...
--
-------------------------------------------
AJ - http://ClitIn.Com e In.
(800 folders. -- kiddie-filtered -- FREE,
Usenet Porn.)
"Paul Hansford" <paulha...@eggconnect.net> wrote in message news:12ii7f9...@corp.supernews.com...
> For those of you who are totally bored by such things, I didn't enter this year, but when I did, I failed to get past the first
> round. I think my work just wasn't silly enough for most of the audience.
>
> How uncool is that?
>
> And it isn't just sour grapes (honest!), but wasn't this just a /qualifier/ for the UK All Stars? The Festival programme seemed
> to think it was
>
> Paul
>
> Poets are the pricks that needle your haystack;
> everyone else gets the finger.
>
>
> "Rob" <r...@mla001.demon.co.uk> wrote in message news:9QgX8WOz...@mla001.demon.co.uk...
Cripple Jinn
Too funny...
I have porn you idiots..
Check out http://Art.here.nu
You're a joke...
--
-------------------------------------------
AJ - http://ClitIn.Com e In.
(800 folders. -- kiddie-filtered -- FREE,
Usenet Porn.)
"Paul Hansford" <paulha...@eggconnect.net> wrote in message news:12ii9ar...@corp.supernews.com...
> Curses! I was hoping nobody would pick up on the other possibilities.
>
>
> "ggamble" <f...@net.com> wrote in message news:cb8ii21g5oj40cig3...@4ax.com...
>> On Sun, 8 Oct 2006 16:48:57 +0100, "Paul Hansford"
>> <paulha...@eggconnect.net> wrote:
>>
>>> I didn't enter this
>>>year, but when I did, I failed to get past the first round. I think my work
>>>just wasn't silly enough for most of the audience.
>>
>>
>> You've failed to consider other alternatives.
>> I've read your work.
>>
>
>
>
Cripple Jinn
scuse--- BALD MORON
--
-------------------------------------------
AJ - http://ClitIn.Com e In.
(800 folders. -- kiddie-filtered -- FREE,
Usenet Porn.)
"Rob" <r...@mla001.demon.co.uk> wrote in message news:ecbfPkSe...@mla001.demon.co.uk...
> In message <12ii7f9...@corp.supernews.com>, Paul Hansford <paulha...@eggconnect.net> writes
>>For those of you who are totally bored by such things, I didn't enter this
>>year, but when I did, I failed to get past the first round. I think my work
>>just wasn't silly enough for most of the audience.
>>
>>How uncool is that?
>>
>>And it isn't just sour grapes (honest!), but wasn't this just a /qualifier/
>>for the UK All Stars? The Festival programme seemed to think it was
>
> If you take a closer look at the programme, you'll see that the qualifier was the day before and the UK Championship was on
> Saturday.
>
> Rob
>
> --
> Rob Evans
>
Cripple Jinn
This is Usenet, you idiot.
--
-------------------------------------------
AJ - http://ClitIn.Com e In.
(800 folders. -- kiddie-filtered -- FREE,
Usenet Porn.)
"Paul Hansford" <paulha...@eggconnect.net> wrote in message news:12ijgim...@corp.supernews.com...
> Thanks Rob, you're right - the qualifier was the day before, which was (thanks to Will for the details) -
>
> THE UK ALL STARS POETRY SLAM! QUALIFIER
> Fancy a starring role in the UK's slam extravaganza? <snip> Fifteen poets only, first come first served, contact Elizabeth
> Robertson on 01242 263494 or email
>
> Hmm! So there were "Fifteen poets only, first come first served" and you ended up top of them! Champion of 15 entries, that is,
> and anyone could enter, even my humble self, if I'd been quick enough or interested.
>
> Still enough bitching; you got the title. And after all, you've had plenty of people congratulate you on the evidence of your ...
> now what did you call it? Oh yes ... Shameless Self Promotion (couldn't have put it better myself) and a little judicious
> name-dropping. Heavens, Will's even tried to grab some reflected glory for himself, and how sad is that?
>
> It is, however, interesting that, so far, only one of the multitude has asked for a sample of the Meisterwerk. Please, you would
> not only satisfy my curiosity, but also gratify your adoring groupies, if you were to post the pieces you performed - 2 was it, or
> 3? - or even one of them, so we could get a flavour.
>
> How do you feel about proving your merit to the wider public?
>
> P
Cripple Jinn
Please don't post to usenet... Thx!!!!!!!!!!!!
--
-------------------------------------------
AJ - http://ClitIn.Com e In.
(800 folders. -- kiddie-filtered -- FREE,
Usenet Porn.)
"Beau Blue" <Beau...@comcast.net> wrote in message news:7qjii2pe4dcnoe5i8...@4ax.com...
> Rob <r...@mla001.demon.co.uk> wrote:
>
>>For those of you who are interested in such things, I became the UK
>>Poetry Slam Champion, 2006 at the Cheltenham Literature Festival on
>>Saturday. Fortunately, the Slam audience (400 plus) appeared to
>>understand what I was saying so I assume that we had no one in from
>>Shadowville.
>
> No one was in from Shallowville 'cause the event wasn't 'noir'
> enough for them? They're not interested in anywhere Dickel
> isn't served? They couldn't afford the airfare? Were there any
> dutchmen present?
>
>>
>>In addition to the prizes (wine, books, and a little money) I have a
>>guest spot back at the Festival next Saturday where I'll be appearing,
>>albeit briefly, in the Roger McGough Poetry Party with him, Brian
>>Patten, Adrian Mitchell and John Agard (amongst others). How cool is
>>that?
>
> It's tres cool. [salute] You're a stud. Congrats.
>
> -blue
>
>
>>
>>Rob
>
> ~ Beau Blue Presents ~ <> http://members.cruzio.com/~jjwebb
> Bill Minor * Robert Sward <> Internet Broadsides
> Morton Marcus * Renay <> Contemporary American Poetry
> ~ Blue's Cruzio Cafe ~ <> http://members.cruzio.com/~cafe
>
Barbara's Cat
> What a pathetic bunch of fools.
<pre><tt>
Thath fer thuwer. Clearly. Datz rat!
| / \ |
..... Yeah! ,'v', @@@@@@ |
/ \ | / _ _ \ @@ OO @@ ___
|() ()| Got any / . . \ ( -- ) /_, \
) ^ ( gay porn? | ) ( |O==**==O oo >)
\+++/ | > ! < / \ C__/ /
.=. .--^--. _| : : |_ / \ UU\(__
.-.-.=.-.-. | RIP | ( | : : | ******** / (\
/ (_-: :-_) \ | -%- | | | : : | |// |. ||\
---------------'-----'-'-----------------------'-----'--
Chuckles Mousy Blankverse Cyborga Goober Duck
</tt></pre>
--
Cm~
Barbara's Cat
> LOSER
"I wish you idiot-kooks would form
your lames based more on reality."
-- Tom Bishop, 5 Apr 2006
--
Cm~
Barbara's Cat
> CRAP...
Barbara's Cat
> You are all morons.
Barbara's Cat
> MORONS...
Barbara's Cat
> Joke moron probably lies about the whole thing.
Message-ID: <894ae$45312e36$18d651b3$22...@KNOLOGY.NET>
> > You're having reasing comprehension problems, Meat?
Message-ID: <8de30$45313b8d$18d651b3$21...@KNOLOGY.NET>
> > You're having reading comprehension problems, Meat?
--
Cm~
Barbara's Cat
> Please don't post to usenet.
Powerless.
--
Cm~
Barbara's Cat
> He's a liar
Cripple Jinn
"Barbara's Cat" <c...@XSPAMkookbusters.org> wrote in message
> "I wish you idiot-kooks would form
> your lames based more on reality."
> -- Tom Bishop, 5 Apr 2006
--
Cripple Jinn
"Barbara's Cat" <c...@XSPAMkookbusters.org> wrote in message news:MPG.1f9c4c0d2...@127.0.0.1...
Cripple Jinn
"Barbara's Cat" <c...@XSPAMkookbusters.org> wrote in message
> Powerless.
What power do I need, idiot?
I claim none.
You are a sewer sucker that subs to women.
Heh...
Upset?
Barbara's Cat
> "Barbara's Cat" <c...@XSPAMkookbusters.org> wrote:
>
> > "I wish you idiot-kooks would form
> > your lames based more on reality."
> > -- Tom Bishop, 5 Apr 2006
>
> squeak
--
Cm~
Barbara's Cat
> "Barbara's Cat" <c...@XSPAMkookbusters.org> wrote:
>
> > Mousy Tom "Champion of Perpetual Whining" Bishop squeaked:
> >
> > > You are all morons.
> >
> > <pre><tt>
> >
> > Thath fer thuwer. Clearly. Datz rat!
> > | / \ |
> > ..... Yeah! ,'v', @@@@@@ |
> > / \ | / _ _ \ @@ OO @@ ___
> > |() ()| Got any / . . \ ( -- ) /_, \
> > ) ^ ( gay porn? | ) ( |O==**==O oo >)
> > \+++/ | > ! < / \ C__/ /
> > .=. .--^--. _| : : |_ / \ UU\(__
> > .-.-.=.-.-. | RIP | ( | : : | ******** / (\
> > / (_-: :-_) \ | -%- | | | : : | |// |. ||\
> > ---------------'-----'-'-----------------------'-----'--
> > Chuckles Mousy Blankverse Cyborga Goober Duck
> >
> > </tt></pre>
>
> squeak
--
Cm~
Barbara's Cat
> I claim none.
Dead mousys usually don't.
--
Cm~
Cripple Jinn
Hey... Must be a friend of yours, loser.
--
-------------------------------------------
AJ - http://ClitIn.Com e In.
(800 folders. -- kiddie-filtered -- FREE,
Usenet Porn.)
"ggamble" <f...@net.com> wrote in message news:ruuhi2paivhdla3im...@4ax.com...
> On Sun, 8 Oct 2006 11:15:15 +0100, Rob <r...@mla001.demon.co.uk> wrote:
>
>>For those of you who are interested in such things, I became the UK
>>Poetry Slam Champion, 2006 at the Cheltenham Literature Festival on
>>Saturday. Fortunately, the Slam audience (400 plus) appeared to
>>understand what I was saying so I assume that we had no one in from
>>Shadowville.
>>
>>In addition to the prizes (wine, books, and a little money) I have a
>>guest spot back at the Festival next Saturday where I'll be appearing,
>>albeit briefly, in the Roger McGough Poetry Party with him, Brian
>>Patten, Adrian Mitchell and John Agard (amongst others). How cool is
>>that?
>>
>>Rob
>
>
> Congratulations, Rob!
>
Cripple Jinn
"Barbara's Cat" <c...@XSPAMkookbusters.org> wrote in message
>> > > You are all morons.
Well put!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Cripple Jinn
Who gives a fyck for poetry, Will.
Stick with performance.
--
-------------------------------------------
AJ - http://ClitIn.Com e In.
(800 folders. -- kiddie-filtered -- FREE,
Usenet Porn.)
"Will Dockery" <will.d...@gmail.com> wrote in message news:1160348025.9...@m73g2000cwd.googlegroups.com...
>
> Paul Hansford wrote:
>> For those of you who are totally bored by such things, I didn't enter this
>> year, but when I did, I failed to get past the first round. I think my work
>> just wasn't silly enough for most of the audience.
>
> Study this so you'll know your audience, this is the sort of
> performance they dig:
>
> http://www.bbc.co.uk/berkshire/stage/poets/robevanspoem.ram
>
> Rob's been in the poetry slams in past years as well, the site for the
> 2002 fest
> http://www.bbc.co.uk/gloucestershire/festivals/2002/08/litfest/cheltlit.shtml
> mentions "...Rob Evans, poetry slam heavyweight...", though no mention
> if he won any previous ones.
>
> Seems to be an event not to be missed for poets in the UK area, so
> don't give up.
>
> --
> "Hasty Pudding" by Will Dockery-Henry Conley
> http://www.myspace.com/willdockery
>
> TAS, featuring the song "Fadeaway Encounter", written by
> Dockery-Conley:
> http://www.johnhmaloney.com/tuesdayshow/tasep34.mp3
>
>
Cripple Jinn
"Barbara's Cat" <c...@XSPAMkookbusters.org> wrote in message news:MPG.1f9c4d614...@127.0.0.1...
> Mousy Tom "Champion of Perpetual Whining" Bishop squeaked:
>
>> He's a liar
Yes, that's what I said.
You're slick, dickless-wonder.
Cripple Jinn
"Barbara's Cat" <c...@XSPAMkookbusters.org> wrote in message
>> I claim none.
You're really feeling today.
But then again... bald robbie never wrote poetry.
Like you.
Karla
>For those of you who are interested in such things, I became the UK
>Poetry Slam Champion, 2006 at the Cheltenham Literature Festival on
>Saturday. Fortunately, the Slam audience (400 plus) appeared to
>understand what I was saying so I assume that we had no one in from
>Shadowville.
>
>In addition to the prizes (wine, books, and a little money) I have a
>guest spot back at the Festival next Saturday where I'll be appearing,
>albeit briefly, in the Roger McGough Poetry Party with him, Brian
>Patten, Adrian Mitchell and John Agard (amongst others). How cool is
>that?
>
>Rob
Great news. Congratulations, Rob!
Karla
Barbara's Cat
> He's a liar, and never produced poetry.
Message-ID: <894ae$45312e36$18d651b3$22...@KNOLOGY.NET>
Barbara's Cat
Pimp of the Holy Sugir
"Rob" <r...@mla001.demon.co.uk> wrote in message news:9QgX8WOz...@mla001.demon.co.uk...
> For those of you who are interested in such things,
You are a brit-fag liar, and bald.
You've posted thousands of Moronic troll postings
and NOW you expect anyone to read your drivel.
Heh... :)
Fuck off, troll.
I've had enough of your shit.
Barbara's Cat
Mousy Tom "Bitter Moron" Bishop squeaked:
> I've had enough of your shit.
"I'm leaving now.
This will be my last post to Usenet groups.
Amd I won't read it either.... :)
I've thought a lot about mkey, and travelling
to MI and handle him. Fact is it sounds too boring.
Go for it, mikey.
Have a good life!
Please don't email me. Thx!"
- Mousy, bitter farewell, 21 Sep 2006
Message-ID:
<1158881616.6...@e3g2000cwe.googlegroups.com>
--
Cm~
Mousy Tom Bishop LARTed me
for "moronic harassment".
You can't see this post.
Rob
the Holy Sugir <A...@Clitin.com> writes
>
I'm leaving now.
This will be my last post to Usenet groups. Amd I won't read it
either.... :)
Ah, poor Tom.
I've thought a lot about mkey, and travelling to MI and handle him.
Fact is it sounds too boring. Go for it, mikey.
Poor, poor jinn.
Have a good life!
Please don't email me. Thx!
Poor, poor, poor little monkey dude,
all ooking a last goodbye on 22.9.06.
(witless typos faithfully preserved)
Rob
--
Rob Evans
When I see a swine
I reach for 45-calibre pearls.
Pimp of the Holy Sugir
"Rob" <r...@mla001.demon.co.uk> wrote in message news:d4ufWVSi...@mla001.demon.co.uk...
> In message <4542fa80$0$15874$8f2e...@news.shared-secrets.com>, Pimp of the Holy Sugir <A...@Clitin.com> writes
>>
> I'm leaving now.
> This will be my last post to Usenet groups. Amd I won't read it
> either.... :)
>
> Ah, poor Tom.
False alarm, and SOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
What is a bald brit fag to do but whine...????
>
> I've thought a lot about mkey, and travelling to MI and handle him.
> Fact is it sounds too boring. Go for it, mikey.
>
> Poor, poor jinn.
You want to go to detroit ghettos?
The moron has been LARTed.... Clear shit.
If he continues -- we'll see. :)
Let the fuckwit try. Or perhaps you, idiot.
You really are stupid enough?
Steal my picture for gay harassment.....
You think your ISP doesn't care??????????
Go for it fuckbrain... as in
http://mikeys-famous-pics.blogspot.com/
The pic is right there... you drooling moron.
Heh... :)
>
> Have a good life!
> Please don't email me. Thx!
>
> Poor, poor, poor little monkey dude,
Poor me.. But at least I have friends.
>
> all ooking a last goodbye on 22.9.06.
>
> (witless typos faithfully preserved)
Poor bald poetless robbie...
I'm sorry you are so dumb...
(but you are)
Art Deco
>Poor bald poetless robbie...
Oh look, Tommiiee Tosser felt the need to morph again.
Hi, Alexa!
--
COOSN-266-06-39716
Official Associate AFA-B Vote Rustler
Official Overseer of Kooks and Saucerheads in alt.astronomy
Official "Usenet psychopath and born-again LLPOF minion",
as designated by Brad Guth
Hi, fanbois!
acytra
Rob wrote:
> For those of you who are interested in such things, I became the UK
> Poetry Slam Champion, 2006 at the Cheltenham Literature Festival on
> Saturday. Fortunately, the Slam audience (400 plus) appeared to
> understand what I was saying so I assume that we had no one in from
> Shadowville.
>
> In addition to the prizes (wine, books, and a little money) I have a
> guest spot back at the Festival next Saturday where I'll be appearing,
> albeit briefly, in the Roger McGough Poetry Party with him, Brian
> Patten, Adrian Mitchell and John Agard (amongst others). How cool is
> that?
>
> Rob
> Rob Evans
>
> Poetry is the needle that pricks your finger;
> everything else is the haystack
acytra
Rob
an e-mail to me duplicating his ooking here. The moron fails to
understand that he would need half a brain before I'd ever exchange an
e-mail with him. Especially when all he has to say is:
"I'm leaving now.
This will be my last post to Usenet groups. Amd I won't read it
either.... :)"
Ah, poor Tom.
"I've thought a lot about mkey, and travelling to MI and handle him.
Fact is it sounds too boring. Go for it, mikey."
Poor, poor jinn.
"Have a good life!
Please don't email me. Thx!"
Poor, poor, poor little monkey dude,
all ooking a last goodbye on 22.9.06.
(witless typos faithfully preserved)
Rob